Just moved in. Massive regret. How soon can we sell up?

Pearmain · 2023-08-10T19:00:12+00:00

Ignoring the fact we’ve spent all our savings on stamp duty and fees and it’s going take a long time to save plus selling in a falling market and equity being at risk - how soon are you actually allowed to sell after buying?

FiddleLeaf · 10/08/2023 20:01

I’m not sure there’s a limit but my two cents… I HATED my current house when we moved it and it took about 6 months for it to feel like home. I love living here now. No one ever talks about hating the new house!

YukoandHiro · 10/08/2023 20:02

I felt like this for the first six months in our home. Now I really like it. Am hopeful that once we finish the work we're planning I will truly love it.

Moving is a big adjustment. It's a kind of grief. Give yourself time before you make a huge decision.

What are the main issues you're struggling with?

minipie · 10/08/2023 20:02

Ok. Deep breath. Many many people think “shit, what have we done” when they first move into a new place. They always seem dismal at first till you have made it your own. What’s the problem with it?

In answer to your question - I don’t think there is any restriction, you could put it for sale tomorrow if you want. But as you say, that’s a lot of money down the drain.

Peeeas · 10/08/2023 20:04

What do you regret? What's changed since you viewed?

Lots of people feel this way immediately after, but it subsides. Can you make changes to make it feel more like hone?

To answer your actual question, I understand that it can be difficult re mortgages etc if there are two sales within a year (money laundering suspicions etc). But not sure if that's a legal point or just policy / practice.

Clefable · 10/08/2023 20:05

You've got the moving in fear. It'll most likely pass.

Pastelrainbow · 10/08/2023 20:06

As others have said, buyers regret is very very normal. Maybe it is a massive mistake but there must have been a reason you wanted to buy the new house. Can you focus on that? Give yourself some time to try and settle in. Try redecorating a room or two to your taste and see if it makes a difference to the way you feel before taking any drastic action. Is there anything in particular that is making you feel so down about the new place?

EmmaGrundyForPM · 10/08/2023 20:07

Why do you want to.move immediately? Is there an issue with the property or neighbourhood you weren't aware of prior to buying?

When I was a baby my parents moved to a new house in a town where my dad had got a job. They didn't know anyone. There was a railway line at the bottom of the street and my Mum spent the first three days crying because she was so lonely and the trains were so loud. She knew they had made a massive mistake.

Then she made friends with the new mum next door, got accustomed to the trains within a week so didn't hear/notice them, and lived there very happily for 10 years.

Give it time.

Original poster

Pearmain · 10/08/2023 20:10

It does fees a bit like grief actually, I’ve not been able to eat properly for days.

I honestly hate it, I keep crying - I don’t want to go into specifics what with the Daily Mail picking up threads but it’s a bit of everything - location actually worse than I thought, layout, noise… things that can’t be changed.

We had a lot of viewings as well plus paid probably top of the market price as the sale has been going through since just before Liz Truss.

I had lots of doubts and DH reassured me but all those doubts are now real and feeling bigger by the day

Trying to stop myself calling webuyanyhouse

OP posts:

borntobequiet · 10/08/2023 20:11

My new neighbours put their place up for sale two weeks after moving in. They said it wasn’t because of me.

Cloudsandrainnotsunandsand · 10/08/2023 20:13

Imo every house is noisier in school holidays.. Give it chance to get quieter op!

PurpleBananaSmoothie · 10/08/2023 20:13

I cried the first morning in our house because we’d made such a massive mistake. We’ve been here 6 years now. We are hopefully moving soon and I’ve never loved the house but I’ve grown to love it and I’m sad we won’t get it to it’s full potential.

How quickly you can move depends on how much equity you have. I would have said that for us to have enough equity that we could do the next move up it was 4 years. But it depends on the house, the market and your earning potential.

VimtoPassion · 10/08/2023 20:16

There's no law against but many lenders won't offer you a mortgage if you're flipping a property within 6 months - to help them comply with money laundering legislation.

The first night we moved in here I was horrified at the road noise. We're not on the main road but you can really hear it. We've been here 20 years now and didn't notice it after the first week or so.

Original poster

Pearmain · 10/08/2023 20:18

Sorry cross posted with your replies, thank you there’s a lot of reassurance there, glad to hear feeling like this is common. We’d been in our last house a long time and it was home even though we’d really outgrown it. I’d go back there like a shot if I could

OP posts:

uhtredbebbanburg · 10/08/2023 20:18

I was really upset the first year we moved in. A big stone house, it was bloody freezing and the roof leaked. I had a gas leak in the first six months, gas leaking out of the original lead pipes under the flor boards. I had sleepless nights about our huge mortgage etc etc. All good now 8 years later. It’s still cold but I’m used to it. The roof is fixed, new pipes. Hopefully it will start feeling like home for you soon.

BadBarry · 10/08/2023 20:24

I love my house, I walk around it feeling thankful when I'm not fed up of all the mess left by the kids etc
BUT the day we got the keys I walked in and I thought fuck this is a mistake.
Please try not to panic, like people say give it different seasons and see how you feel.

Tulipvase · 10/08/2023 20:25

We moved in lock down, only saw the house once. I felt pretty awful when we first moved in. We moved from a very quiet place to a main road and it felt so loud. We also needed to extend so had to sleep in the living room for 6 months.

I still don’t love the road but being 5/10 mins walk through the park to town is great. And a period property like mine, but one road back, would have been 100k more.

I love my house now (mostly).

girljulian · 10/08/2023 20:26

I remember when I was twelve and we moved house, my mam sat down in the living room and cried, saying “I want to go home”. They’re still there twenty years later.

ActDottie · 10/08/2023 20:30

I think buyers regret is normally particularly early on when you’re trying to make the house work for you.

In terms of “being allowed” to sell you can sell as soon as you want to there are no rules.

EmmaEmerald · 10/08/2023 20:30

borntobequiet · 10/08/2023 20:11

My new neighbours put their place up for sale two weeks after moving in. They said it wasn’t because of me.

You know they lied though right? 😂

seriously, OP, I felt terrible after I moved in April. I didn't realise I was grieving until someone said it to me.

four months later - yes, it still might be a mistake. I feel much better than I did but I don't know for sure and won't decide in a hurry. But I think you will know what's right, if that makes sense.

TheYearOfSmallThings · 10/08/2023 20:32

Don't do anything - just wait. Most people freak out and have buyers remorse when they move into their new home and see everything that needs doing. I did, and I KNEW I liked it really.

Suspend judgement while you tidy the place up and fix what needs fixing - you will almost certainly feel differently in a month or so.

YukoandHiro · 10/08/2023 20:32

Pearmain · 10/08/2023 20:18

Sorry cross posted with your replies, thank you there’s a lot of reassurance there, glad to hear feeling like this is common. We’d been in our last house a long time and it was home even though we’d really outgrown it. I’d go back there like a shot if I could

Honestly I felt EXACTLY like this, and I posted somewhere about it so you might be able to find the thread. It was only nine months ago. I just felt like we'd been rushed into a decision (by the Truss stuff) and although we'd outgrown our previous place and it was impractical I also adored the location and was very at home there.

I felt particularly awful because I'd never experienced that before; I've moved a lot in my life and considered myself quite nomadic and normally feel totally at home very quickly. But it took me months to adjust here. I took a lot of comfort from other posters saying exactly what they are here too.

And they were all right! We've done quite a bit of cosmetic work, which obviously helps it feel more "ours", but I'm much more settled now. The location isn't exactly what I wanted but it's what we could afford in these weird times and having the space for the whole family has been life transforming.

Hang in there OP. Promise yourself you'll give it a year (that's what I did) and then see how you feel then. I bet you'll be surprised!

HauntedPencil · 10/08/2023 20:32

Pearmain · 10/08/2023 20:10

It does fees a bit like grief actually, I’ve not been able to eat properly for days.

I honestly hate it, I keep crying - I don’t want to go into specifics what with the Daily Mail picking up threads but it’s a bit of everything - location actually worse than I thought, layout, noise… things that can’t be changed.

We had a lot of viewings as well plus paid probably top of the market price as the sale has been going through since just before Liz Truss.

I had lots of doubts and DH reassured me but all those doubts are now real and feeling bigger by the day

Trying to stop myself calling webuyanyhouse

I cried all week when we moved here - I know loads of friends that did to.

Set yourself a timescale - think it's a one/two year house and think of things you can do to improve it that might help sell it on, and regroup next year.

NewHouseNewMe · 10/08/2023 20:33

Does your new house need extensive work?

I think people who move into non-renovated places somethings feel like this. But remember the things that made you decide it was perfect - garden, location etc.

bonzaitree · 10/08/2023 20:34

I hated my flat when I moved in. HATED it. It was scruffy, old fashioned, filthy dirty, noisy etc.

4 years and some TLC later I love love love it.

I think sometimes it’s us hating the change not hating the house.

Backstreets · 10/08/2023 20:37

I remember getting the keys to a previous apartment and going straight in to sit on the toilet seat (closest thing to a chair in the house) and crying my eyes out. I think it’s a pretty common feeling! Most of us live within our means and few of us get the dream house, but we grow into a place and make it ours.