Just moved in. Massive regret. How soon can we sell up?

[Pearmain]

Ignoring the fact we’ve spent all our savings on stamp duty and fees and it’s going take a long time to save plus selling in a falling market and equity being at risk - how soon are you actually allowed to sell after buying?

Also and not to be flippant, I just remembered our 2 cats after our move.. omg they were so upset...(the DC were fine, happy to have their own bedrooms)... but the poor cats were so upset, very unsettled. Took them a good while to settle down.

The noise problems will fade surprisingly quicky as you get used to it. Soon enough you will get to know the area and start to appreciate it to some degree.

Treat yourself through the transition to take the edge off. Eat well, good food, home cooked and soon enough it will feel like home.

How long have you been in@Pearmain? Wait until you’ve unpacked /decorated & it feels properly your own.

Perhaps complex emotions and the consequences of stress?

It was a move that was a huge lifestyle change and relocation. It's not necessarily 'wrong' - it's an adjustment.

The reality of moving into a stranger's house with the unfamiliar smells, decor that isn't your own, unexpected work that needs doing, mental fatigue after a big move, etc.

How about giving yourself a six month deadline to make a decision? And in the meantime see is there something you could work on that might help you sell it? Could the front garden be improved? Or could you experiment with staging?

Having a plan to work to might help with the immediate feelings and maybe as you work on it you might just start to like it.

We did this once, I lasted 4 years, still hated it, was so pleased to have left!

This exact thing happened to us. I wanted to move almost as soon as we got there. Never house hunt 4 months pregnant! We tried repeatedly to sell (as our 2 year fixed mortgage deal came up for renewal), 2 failed buyers later and finally we found someone as stupid as we were to sell it on to. Never ever looked back - I flipped the bird to the horrid road as our removals van pulled off. Not to sound patronising, but I now use the mantra ‘location, location, location’ when house hunting and am not lured by period property sirens in unfavourable areas. You could argue that’s a way to realise the full market potential of a property, but you need to dig deep to live somewhere you don’t like or feel at home in.

Less than 6 months and you'll face some difficulties. So put your house on the market in 3/4 months and you should be fine.

@OsirisservesAnubis what difficulties??

I've been here 13 years, but I just like to know these things!

I feel like this too. But I’m addition we moved areas and changed my sons school - which I’ve had massive guilt over. We’ve had many nights with him crying saying “he wants to go home” - felt awful as I actually felt the same but had to reassure him that it was all going to be ok and that he would gradually feel more settled and make new friends in his new school.

I’m still not sure if we made the right decision and we moved in December just gone - gorgeous large house and recently renovated but just still doesn’t feel like home somehow - I hope over time that will change. If not I’m thinking of it as a 2-3 year house and we will move again. I just don’t want to cause my son any more move trauma!

I was coming here to ask exactly the same as @IAmMerfacus !! I think we're thinking of the same person.... 😊

@YukoandHiro , are you the person who moved from a small, terraced (I think) house where you knew all the neighbours to a larger house a short drivable distance away with a beautiful garden??

I really hope you are the person me and Merfacus are thinking of, because that poster was so lovely, and her moving grief was so horrible. Either way, I'm glad things worked out for you!

I had this for at least a year - redecorating helps I chose room that annoyed me most I still think we paid too much and I still look through rightmove once a week.

I hated my current house for the first year. I didn’t miss the location of the previous house but I did miss how lovely and easy to keep nice it was.
The last 6 months I have worked really hard on current house and I think it’ll take another year to make it home.
So give it more time. I’ve moved a lot and it’s always awful for the first few months

Joining in with the chorus here @Pearmain

We (me DH and 2 kids) moved into our current property about 12 years ago. And once we've moved in, within a couple of days, an elderly man from down the road walked past and pointed at the garden and said 'you'd better sort that lot out soon. They'll be talking about you in this road. We don't like messy gardens' and walked off!

And shortly after, two women were just about to pass our driveway and I said 'hi' and smiled. They crossed the road to avoid speaking to me. I was like

Then the first night we were there stopping overnight. The aged 45-ish man next door was playing music so loud at 1am, that me, and our two kids (in their teens at the time,) were in floods of tears because we couldn't sleep. I thought what the fuck have we moved next to?

And then after four or five days - our toilet was blocked and we had to get the water board out, and it turned out it wasn't the toilet!! It was the drain outside at the bottom of the big side garden (some 50 feet from the house.) Even though it's about 4 foot deep, it was blocked right to the top with shit and baby wipes and all kinds of crap, and it took them 2 hours to clear it. The same man who slated the garden was walking past and said 'they always had to get that cleaned out every few months ...It's always getting blocked.' I thought 'fucking great!'

The flipping curtain poles came out of the wall as soon as we put the curtains on them, the bathroom ceiling turned to shit and went mouldy and all cracked and split within a few weeks of moving in (was a split and mouldy ceiling that had been carefully painted over,) and then the garage door broke, and we had tons of stuff in there and couldn't get to it!!!

This was all in the first few weeks. I regretted so badly moving in that I was in tears day after day after day for the first month.

Then as time went on, we got the garden nice, we got the drain fixed properly so it never blocked again, and we decorated, got a new bathroom ceiling, and fixed the curtain poles. We also and started speaking to the man next door and told him there was someone living here now - it had been empty for 6 months and he got used to playing loud music, and his music was turned down after we said we live here now. Then the neighbours in the village started warming to us.. They were wary about outsiders as they had had a few townies moving in who were entitled arseholes moaning about farm noise and Church bells and shit...

When they realised we weren't like this they started to be much friendlier and chatted to us ... Then we started getting compliments about our garden, and within about five or six months, we absolutely loved it here - and still do. How close it was to the river and the woodlands and the hills. It's a beautiful area that we live in. We are still here after about 12 years, and will never move.

But yes! Very common to dislike your new house and the area! You'll be fine.

I know how you feel, we moved into a property, hated it , then put it back on the market after 2 weeks. It took a while to sell , but in the end it all worked out. Good luck with whatever you decide.

the poroblems would be all the fees for getting out of the mortgage the solicitrs etc

give it 6 months then see how you feel

I am about to move in 4 weeks. The house is lovely, big (hopefully not too big with COL crisis 😞) and exactly where we wanted to move to.

So why do I have regret already? Because I know I'm stuck here for 10 years. I'm really nomadic and have moved a lot, including countries, but now I need to settle for the DC senior schooling.

Which is probably lucky, as I think it will take us that long until the market is ready again to be able to sell the house for what we paid.

Every house I've moved into a house, l've only felt happy when I remind myself we'll move again soon because of the size of the house/location etc.

I still hate mine two years in, but not as much as when we first moved in. It's a renovation so we can't sell until it's done as we would lose money.

The more changes we make, the more acceptable the house becomes, but that doesn't change the issues we have with the arsehole next door (semi). When he goes on holiday and the other neighbours are out, it's truly lovely stood in the garden listening to the birds and the peace/quiet. Sadly it doesn't happen often enough.

I knew it was a mistake before completion but my DP was sure this was the best option for us. We both loved a different house but it seemed like a money pit - our house has turned out to be a more expensive money pit that we hate, so we're doubly pissed off (sold for £25k less than ours and was detached 😑).

Time really does fly though and I can't believe we've been here 2.5yrs. We'd never intended to stay longer than 5yrs anyway but with COL etc, we might end up stuck here as the house won't be easy to sell (was for sale on/off for 10yrs before we bought it).

Yes I’m curious as well.

I hated this place for the first five years I lived here. The people are bloody awful too. My ex then buggered off with OW and tried to get this place from me and I had done so much work here, I wasn't prepared to let the pair of them have it and since then, I have come to love it and have been here since 1996 now.

It's not my forever home and I will move to be closer to family soon but I will struggle to find anywhere I love as much. The locals are still foul but I don't mix with them.

Same here - 4 years. Just sold the bloody place.
I really wanted to sell last year but kept putting it off.
It wasn't particularly 'bad' in any way. It was very spacious and good sized rooms but it just never felt like home and needed things doing to it on a regular basis which I didn't have the money for. I also didn't like my neighbours who had 5 cars and consistently parked one of them about a cm off my dropped curb making it very difficult for me to reverse into the narrow driveway. The silly woman suddenly stopped speaking to me when she saw the sale sign go up (even though she was the one being an entitled teenager with her cars). 😂

When we bought our first house though OP the seller had only been in it a year. I think he was a student and couldn't keep up the mortgage.

**So why do I have regret already? Because I know I'm stuck here for 10 years. I'm really nomadic and have moved a lot, including countries, but now I need to settle for the DC senior schooling.

I can so relate. I don't think I've been in the same place for more than about 4/5 years since I was a teenager (my parents moved to France first) and then I worked abroad in different places after uni until I had children. Even then, we have moved a lot as we separated and left the area. After that, moved again to a cheap area to get on the property ladder. Now moving again.
I think it's very difficult for us to stick in one place for long and we should be banned from buying houses in one place.😆Luckily, my kids have settled well whenever we've moved and it's not affected their education so far but I need to stay now as 2nd one is going up to secondary and 1st will be doing GCSEs in a couple of years.

I think the media/ marketing narrative around homes doesn't help. We're all supposed to have dream homes and forever homes, but for the vast majority of us, there are going to be compromises and often those have to be fairly significant (no-one's ideal location is an A road but maybe that's what you can get if you also want 4 bedrooms and a big garden). Often even dream homes throw up nasty surprises like previous owner's DIY botch jobs/ drains that are prone to blocking/ electrics that trip/ the mysterious leak in the living room ceiling.

Give it at least a year before making any decisions.

@SpidersAreShitheads @IAmMerfacus

I didn't move from a terrace, but I did move from a flat in a place I loved to a 4 bed house with a garden further away from DC school etc. Don't get me wrong we've still got tons of renovation work to do and it doesn't feel like a forever house yet but it's getting there and I feel very settled now. Our lounge and our DCs' bedrooms are all done and look lovely, so lots of places to feel at home. Our master bath is also done and I'm so pleased with it. Just need to get our bedroom done now so can really relax there.
Kitchen will be last as we're running out of money. But I'm so so much happier than I was when I first moved. The space has really improved our quality of life