Anyone done big commute for dream home?

[MonkeysWedding]

We (DH & 1 year old DC) have been looking at joining the London exodus, freed by the fact that we won’t need to be in the office everyday. But we’re quite late to the trend and so everything within an easy commute is already so expensive.

We’ve found what would be our dream house but it would mean 2.5 hours on the train each way. We’ll probably need to be in the office 2 days a week. We could work in the train so could be reasonably productive time. Train tickets would be very costly, but doable for the right home.

Has anyone done this? And was it a case of getting into new routines, or was it too exhausting to do long term?

I’m so tempted for the fantastic lifestyle we’d have, including being near family. But nervous of doing something we’d regret if it was a strain to do over time.

We've just bought in Scotland and my Husband will commute 2 days a week to Paddington.

@MeanderingGently were you doing that commute 5 days a week to start with? You must have the stamina of a bull !

It sounds a lot, but if it really is only 2 days a week then I think it's ok. It's 10 hours commuting a week, so the equivalent to doing 1 hour each way, 5 days a week, which is a pretty average commute.

For the right house in your dream location, I would go for it. Just make sure you've got your childcare sorted and a back up plan in place for if the children are sick and need picking up from school.

A 2.5 hour commute each way is pretty standard in central London (it’s the commute a lot of commuters do from the southeast)

Are you serious? I've worked in London for the past 20 years and I don't know anyone who does/did a five hour round trip, that would be complete madness, and definitely not 'pretty standard'.

It would be too far for me. I've done shorter commutes that have been a killer.
It all seems doable in the summer but winter is really hard. It grinds you down over time.
Just don't make a decision based on the best case scenario.

Trains can be a nightmare. If you've got any changes at all you'll be stressed for the whole journey. Nothing more frustrating than sitting outside Euston knowing you only need to move another mile, but there's a signalling problem and you're stuck.
Having to always leave on the dot for the journey home puts you in ill favour with your colleagues.
You're always tired.
Working on the train? Depends on the job. You can't (or shouldn't) take calls for anything confidential. WiFi is also a nightmare. That's if you can get a seat.

If you decide to go for it, try and test the journey before you are tied into a purchase. It really does depend on where you're travelling from and to.

I wouldn't do it - it's just too far IMO. I would (and did) contemplate somewhere 60-90mins away, but my 2-3day/week WFH/Flexi hours status was assured.

I'm a long commute veteran...

Honestly 1.5 hrs each way is the maximum tolerable commute IMO.

Is 2.5 hours door to door?

Even if you managed to stick to 9-5 that's a very long day and doesn't take into account train delays, needing to work a bit later, etc.

What kind of budget do you have? What kind of house and area are you looking for?

. I believe the average in London is about 45 mins.

I'm sure I read it was around 70-80mins. Im a Londoner & never lived further out than z3. A 20 min tube commute easily takes double when you include walking to & from the stations, waiting for trains, getting on one thats not too packed etc. I also worked locally & what was a 35 min walk & should have been less than 10 mins by car could take 45 mins plus due to traffic.

It's 10 hours commuting a week, so the equivalent to doing 1 hour each way, 5 days a week, which is a pretty average commute.

That's how I see it.

How can you be sure your company will guarantee WFH for the foreseeable, I say this as someone and everyone else at my company (blanket statement) who had a WFH contract that was pulled and we were required to go into the office everyday, I only live 10 mins away, others had set up home offices in rural locations. Lots of people left of their own accord, great for the company as less redundancy payouts.

I did newcastle to London once a week, staying overnight so 2 full days in the office. I managed 1 year could have coped with maybe 2 or 3 if no kids.

I think also you need to remember DC is only 1. Think long term about school drop offs/pick ups plus commute and how solid is the 2 day working from home. I would do it for a few years if it is just 2 yeras and you can cover childcare, food and other needa during those two days as those two days you may be too tired to do anything else.

I think if it was one of you, and one could work more locally it would be ok but if its both of you then you won't see each other in the week, the co-ordination and aggrevivation would get to you both. Either your London jobs must be very senior/ well paid to consider this, but that comes with a lot of expectation or I would look for a new job for one of you. I wouldn't rely on being able to work on the train as part of your standard working hours, we are a very flexible work place and this would still cause resentment so wouldn'tbe encouraged. Also even those who do long commutes infrequently have to be around for meetings when needed - not to their regular schedule. Never socialising with colleagues does impact on relationships imo but this can be over come / isn't a deal breaker. Staying in town is pretty bleak if you don't have family you can stay with.

Personally I’d find a cheap hotel or air bnb close to work so that you go to London one day, sleep in London, do another days work in London and return home. This would mean 2.5 hour commute on two days rather then 5 hour commute on two days

If you did Monday/Tuesday and your DH did Thursday/Friday in London, you’d be able to cover childcare.

I think it's doable (as is anything) but long term extremely exhausting, even for only two days.

In my youth I commuted an hour on the train from SE to London plus walk/tube each end. It was 5 days a week and it was shattering. Now I live in London and it's 45min door to door. So agree with all the comments regarding unreliable trains/poor weather etc.

Anyway no idea where you work but in City firms there has been discussions about wage negotiations for employees who are very far from the office seeing as they aren't able to come into the the office daily if required so could be offered a lower salary. Also flexible working agreements can change very quickly if the business deems it as necessary and there's nothing you can do about that. Plus the risk of losing this job and having to find another in your field - do opportunities exist locally?

As long as you are aware of these possibilities and can take it on the chin if your employer changes expectations/reduces salary (why pay london salaries to employees who live in *insert far away city) and emotionally you can cope with that commute then go for it. Most people I know who have increased commutes from London to adjacent counties pre Covid have found it very hard.

Obviously it's a gamble - not all these things may happen and it could work well for you. For me, the possibility of things turning on a sixpence, would make me say no.

I really wouldn't do this. Behind the scenes at various firms, there are regrets that they made arrangements to allow so much WFH. At my work a few people moved a long way away and that "only an hour from X" journey is actually 2 when they've to add on delays, time waiting on both sides and so on.

Do people really think remote working will stop? DH & I and I and the vast majority of people I know have always had an element of remote working pre covid, it's just increased a bit.

@duckyla - If companies want to reduce workforce without payouts/redundancy - yes, I’ve seen it happen, I work for a large global. People left of their own accord as didn’t want the commute everyday.

But surely it's quite drastic to completely stop remote working for all because you want some people to leave.

Like I said the firms I know all offered remote working pre covid for years & are planning just a small increase eg 1 extra day a wk

As someone who has a 15-20 minute commute in the car this sounds like utter madness to me.

My major concern would be that the WFH situation starts to reverse over time. It was all very well having equal productivity when we were all in it together and it was novel, but will that continue for years, through changes in employees and so on?

The only way you'd be guaranteed working from home is if your business was your own. At the whim of an employer I would not risk having to do that commute 5 days a week.

And most big firms need to remain competitive eg Deloitte is unlikely to say 0 remote working whilst KPMG has switched to a hybrid model. Londons sq ft office space was shrinking pre covid as many places embraced flexi working & hot desking. Don't forget it saves the businesses money too.

I'm doing the opposite. Selling my dream house with an acre of garden, a small rural town where we have friends of ten years plus to take the 1.5 twice daily drive out of my life. Moving to a town where I know no one and a teeny urban garden but will have a walk to work.

The commute is physically breaking me. I get out of my car like a hunched up little old lady. The amount of time I currently spend driving will be used for exercise, music, MSc studying etc. Plus my petrol budget of circa £400 per month will be saved.