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Panicking about moving to suburbs - WYYD?

103 replies

toburbornottoburb · 09/04/2021 14:47

TLDR: I’m worried lockdown has impacted our requirements for what and where we want to buy and we’ll end up regretting our choice to move further out once London starts to open up again.

Insanely long version of events:

Myself and my other half had an offer accepted on a house in a London suburb about a month ago. We’re late 20s and FTBs. Our sellers have only found a property to buy in the last week and since then, the thought of us actually moving away from our much loved area in Zone 2/3 has sent me into a panic with many a cold sweat.

I fear the combination of lockdown brain and the craziness of the current property market got to us a bit and we made a rash choice based on immediate circumstances which won’t be permanent.

When we first started looking, our area and criteria were wildly different:

  • Flat with garden space for dog
  • Quick transport links into London for work and hobbies (I dance and take classes in central)
  • Okay green space for dog
  • Decent area with the classic millennial loves - coffee shops, good pubs, some bars etc
  • A place we’d be happy in for at least 7 years

Somehow over the course of 6 months they morphed into:

  • House
  • Decent transport links
  • Huge swathes of green space for us and the dog
  • Excellent schools for our hypothetical children
  • A place we’d be okay to live in for 10+ years if not maybe forever

I think the impact of second lockdown in London over winter (aka feeling suffocated and claustrophobic as hell) meant that we started to prioritise certain requirements over others without taking a beat. These lockdowns are not permanent, our beloved city will come back to life eventually, and I’m terrified we’ll then spend our entire time wishing we hadn’t moved so far away.

Moving to the burbs for better green space and a house was never even a consideration before the lockdowns occurred. I’m used to having activities in my immediate area - we go into central for hobbies and occasionally for a night out, but predominately our local area “nights out” are important to me - I like to support my local community. The new area doesn’t have much in the way of “basic millennial loves”…which you’d expect. It’s also full of people in quite a different stage of life to us (kids etc.)

The new list is definitely highly practical on paper and makes long-term sense, but I’m struggling with the idea that some of the reasons we're moving are hypothetical scenarios i.e. kids. We’re moving to a family focused area - we don’t want to start trying for kids for at least 2 years so we won’t actually need the facilities of a “good family area” for 3 (if all goes well), and definitely won’t need excellent schools for about 7-8 years.

My other half is far more logical and rational than I am - I’m definitely an emotion and gut person. He is quite happy with the area (he’d be happy most places as he’s far more easy going than I), and is frustrated with my back and forth (understandably)…he also loves the house. The house is lovely, but it’s the area I’m having wobbles over. He’s also stated as I’m the one who is unsure, it’s ultimately my decision…which is piling the pressure on and I don't want him to be unhappy.

If you were in our shoes, WWYD? Find somewhere further in for the shorter term to enjoy, or bite the bullet, move further out and just accept that while in the short-medium term it’s not quite the right fit, long-term it makes sense.

Our budget is approx 650K, which gets you a decent flat where we live now, or a house further out...we could extend to 700K if it was the right home.

I know it sounds ridiculous - the burbs are not the sticks and you'd think I was moving to a village in the back of beyond with the way I'm talking! That being said, I'm London born and bred so it's a relatively big change for me. Equally I'm aware of how much of a privileged position we're in to even have this (seriously first world) "problem".

OP posts:
Charley50 · 10/04/2021 20:13

It's called Buyer's Remorse.

shivermetimbers77 · 10/04/2021 20:39

I grew up in Zone 4 and really enjoyed it as a teen: easy to get into town on the train/night bus, but also lots of green space . I thought it was the best of both worlds. Now I live in zone 2/3 borders and find it a bit too noisy/polluted.

DoIHaveToMakeUpAUsername · 26/10/2023 19:33

Hi there, I stumbled upon your message in 2023. I'm in a similar position, offer on a house in Zone 4 accepted but struggling to come to term with leaving Zone 2. How did things turn out for you, two years down the line?

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