Flat vs house – settle a debate between DH and me

[butterbeanplant]

Hi all,

I would really appreciate your advice as we’re kinda stuck!

So DH and I are wanting to buy a place in south London. We’re looking for a 2bed, 2bath place. Budget of £500k (so we stay under FTB stamp duty rate). We don’t have kids yet and don’t expect them for a few years (fingers crossed!!)

Problem is we have wildly different views on what to buy…

[MN playing up!!]

DH reckons we should buy a house – we’ve been looking around Catford / Lee / Blockley. Up and coming… good schools… easy commute… potential to do up some repairs.

Now I reckon we ought to buy a flat - like Brixton / Balham…all places with easy connections to central London… better to get a place that suits our life now and worry about what happens next when an if it happens. Catford is too far away from where we work and socialise tbh and too suburban (sorry!! ).

DH is adamant on a freehold. He hates the idea of paying service charges etc and says we don’t know what will happen in a few years… he’s worried about being priced out when we start a family. That’s his “right-brain” analytical thinking a freehold place would be a sensible purchase.

But I can’t imagine being so far away from everything and needing to get home by the last train at 11pm.

Who can help?!! Were going around in circles. Any advice to break the deadlock? Anyone in similar situation?!

I'm with your H here. House and freehold every time.

House here too, you can always add value/extend with a house. Much harder to do with a flat.
Also flat you have to deal with noise/neighbour issues alot more.

I’d go with what works now and in the foreseeable future. If you’re not ready for life in suburbia, you’re not ready. And you are not going to be happy there.

Doesn't Catford have buses? If so there will be a night bus. Freehold house every time.

I live in the back of beyond. The last train from London to the nearest station ( 10 miles away, no taxis) leaves Liverpool Street at 9 pm. Think yourself lucky

World's greatest fan of Brockley and forward planning here .

Buy a house in Brockley. Or at least a flat with garden if that's something you feel you'll want/need with DC. And I agree with him re share of freehold/freehold. Basically I think house moving is stressful, time consuming and expensive enough that if you can leapfrog some "steps" you should. And I don't think the transport down here is so bad that it's last trains at 11pm. And we have a high street with things like this on it.

HOUSE

(Though for your budget it'll be a house on the west side of Brockley, which is less lovely-lovely. But I'd still go for it.)

House every time. Have you looked at Bromley, Grove Park, Lee area. You'll find something in your budget. Dont buy a leasehold property.

I would go for the house, or at least a flat with share of freehold. Brockley is nice.

We rented in Balham. Then moved further south after buying a house when pregnant

Looked at properties to purchase and everything around 500k was very small. Even if just looking for one bedroom.

you’d get more for your money elsewhere.

Definitely freehold and definitely a house.

Nah, you’ve got your whole life to live in a sensible quiet family area. Live for now and enjoy your time somewhere with some buzz about it.

We had a flat till first ds was 2 and I loved being somewhere buzzy and easy to walk around on maternity leave.

Been there, didn’t do house. Wish we had. We would be in a very different position financially now.

House everytime for me. I can't stand the thought of someone living above/below.

Plus you could be victim to increasing service charges and ground rents.

I would get a flat in a more interesting and central part of London now and move out to the ‘burbs when children come along (more Kent or Surrey). I don’t think the places you mention are a good compromise, they aren’t lively enough for a young professional and they aren’t nice enough to bring up children in. For 500k you won’t get a house in a decent part of London, go for a flat now, you are only young and responsibly free once!

A house every time, moving costs money so why buy somewhere you will outgrow. Be honest, how often are you out after midnight? (pretty sure trains run until then) and there's night buses.

Freehold over leasehold any day of the week

You’re just at different stages in your life. Sounds like you won’t be ready to settle down for many years? Is that what it’s about?

In terms of coming back from a night out, it isn’t all doom and gloom. We’re out in zone 5 (Sutton) and while we can walk to fields from our house, it’s only a £10 mini cab journey from the tube (or a bus ride).

If you are open to having children in the future, I’d probably settle on a house but in an area with good transport links so you can party all you want.

Re a quality family area on your budget, though, you’d ideally want to be in the boroughs of Sutton, Bromley or Kingston rather that Lewisham.

House. Don't know about this freehold stuff. Don't have that in Scotland.

House, house, house.

What if you stay in the flat while pregnant? What if you don't have a lift and you are on the top floor? What if you end up with symphysis pubis dysfunction and are in agony until about 1 year after birth?

Yes, that sounds oddly specific, yes that happened to me.

House, house, house!

With a budget ring fenced for Uber's perhaps? Until you have the transport sussed.

Even if you go for a flat, make sure it is big enough in case you do have any children and don’t want to move. I know loads of people bringing up children and teens happily in flats in Brixton. I knew very few who actually moved out to Kent or Surrey in the end. People tended to stay.

Pretty convincing! [shocked] Thanks for everyones answers!

@fufulina can you explain more pls? if not too personal.

@Platoatemysnozcumber where do you think would be a good compromise?

@stucknoue that's a good point...maybe twice a week after midnight

@jojoSM2 what sort of places are you thinking?

With a flat you are likely to be at the mercy of the other occupants and/or management company - and their mental health, common sense, practical minds or lack of - if you/they want to do anything, repairs or improvements etc, that affect a communal area or roof. Our when you need to sell. This can really really put a spanner in things.

I have had bad experiences with this so wouldn't ever go back to a flat if I could help it.

House

House. A leasehold is subject to so many other factors and potential issues like problems with the freeholder, other leaseholders, estate managers etc, that I just wouldn't. Yes social life is important but you'll not be moving to the arseend of nowhere.