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Original poster

Buyers remorse...tell me it's normal

240 replies

DavetheCat2001 · 02/06/2019 18:47

I've been reading back on old threads about this, it does seem to be 'a thing', but I am slightly freaking out about us moving into our new house this coming Friday.

Canned version of events: it has taken over 4 months to get here, lost a set of buyers on our place, lost a solicitor along the way, had financial issues etc..won't go into detail as not really relevant, but we REALLY wanted this house and finally exchanged last week.

Went in there yesterday morning with the kids to measure the windows for blinds, and as soon as I walked in it felt cold, dark and gloomy. It's Edwardian, and it's been empty for over a year and not loved, it's a project house and in my head could be beautiful but the truth is we are stretching ourselves to our absolute limit financially, and will have nothing left over after completion.

OH is going to do a lot of work himself (when he can fit it in working FT), and we save for things as we go.

It was such a beautiful sunny day yesterday, but walking in there was like going into a musty cave. Both DC's were bickering and youngest had a meltdown when she saw the room we were thinking of for her..stomped around the house on raw floorboards making a racket and saying she hated it etc..

OH and I have been bickering too..think the stress has got to us, and best of all it appears that the vendor has for some reason since the last time we saw the house (mid April) ripped down the fusebox in the hallway, leaving us with no working plug sockets in the house???!!?

We couldn't test the grotty oven that is being left and so as it stands we move in on Friday into a house we cannot plug in our fridge/cook anything/heat etc...fucking nightmare.

Obviously we raised this with the EA on Saturday, but in his typical fashion he never came back to us despite saying he was going to contact the vendor immediately to find out what he is doing.

So tomorrow morning we get onto our solicitor to let them know...vendor has to make good and I have said there is no way I am moving into that house on Friday with my kids if no electricity, FFS.

That would put us in breach of contract with our buyers I'm guessing, so the whole thing is a nightmare.

Came back to our light, bright flat yesterday and just wanted to cry. Been here 14 years, had my kids here and made this place lovely.

I don't want to go..what were we thinking??? We need more space for sure with 2 growing DC's (5 and 8), and I thought I loved the house but I don't think I do anymore. Rang my mum for advice and wise words and she said I was the same when I bought our current flat as it was a state too, and I apparently spent many weekends back at her house as didn't want to be here either!

Can anyone please just bring me down and reassure me that this will pass and it will all be ok?

Packers come in on Thursday to pack us up, and we have a cleaning co booked to go into the house on Thursday too to deep clean it as it is minging....obviously they cannot do this if no bloody power in the house!!

Auuugh..just want to crawl under my duvet and it all to go away.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
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Original poster
DavetheCat2001 · 02/06/2019 21:41

Thank you @tethersend

It has a lot of potential and is a bigger house than we ever though we could afford...just daunted and nervous.

OP posts:
Inferiorbeing · 02/06/2019 21:48

When we moved in I nearly cried- it was so much worse than we expected, everything was sticky with dirt, it stunk and all I could see was a list of jobs. 7 months later and I love our house! It was hard at the start though, I felt like blaming DP for "choosing" this house (despite it being my decision too) and kept looking at rightmove and all the other houses we "could" have had. Now though I adore everything and couldn't imagine not living here

Bluntness100 · 02/06/2019 21:52

It's gorgeous ! What are you worried about.!

Original poster
DavetheCat2001 · 02/06/2019 21:53

It's a wreck inside!

Trying to see if I can post some pics.

OP posts:
Bluntness100 · 02/06/2019 21:54

Ok let's have a look then!

Ginnymweasley · 02/06/2019 21:57

In the 1st week of moving into our house the toilet broke, a damp patch appeared on the wall from a leaky drain pipe, we realised that only 2 sockets in the kitchen worked, the vendor had left a rusty freezer in the garden and everything was painted green which hadn't seemed to bad on viewing but was horrible to live in. I spent the 1st week stressing out and telling my mum I had made a huge mistake.
3 months in, we get a new kitchen soon, the toilet has been fixed and I have got rid of some of the green. It's nowhere near where I want it (only dds room is finished) but it feels a lot more like home.

Ginnymweasley · 02/06/2019 21:58

Oh and the cream walls were actually just nicotene stained white paint.
It really does get better. You chose the house for a reason and you will remember that after a while.

DavetheCat2001 · 02/06/2019 22:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Ginnymweasley · 02/06/2019 22:05

It looks lovely in a got loads of potential sort of way. I have found it helps to focus on the end game but 1 room at a time. So I focused on my dd room first, then the kitchen etc. Its helped to stop me getting overwhelmed. I also have to admit I dont notice the little things that bothered me in the 1st few weeks anymore.

Bluntness100 · 02/06/2019 22:08

It's not a wreck.but get your stuff in there and it will
Be fine.

Buy some cheap paint and do the walls. Then either hire a sander or get some cheap carpet fitted. It's got a huge amount of potential both inside and In the garden,

Original poster
DavetheCat2001 · 02/06/2019 22:14

Thanks...planning to sand the floors downstairs and carpet upstairs eventually.

I told OH that we should get the front room done as soon as possible so we at least have one space we can shut the door and escape from the rest.

Thanks all for sharing your stories. I'll update after we have moved in and hopefully settled a bit.

OP posts:
hsegfiugseskufh · 02/06/2019 22:14

Oh it will be fine! Ours was much much worse than that and weve had to knock a wall down and put patio doors in and re plaster every. Single. Wall. That house will be beautiful and youll be wondering why you ever felt this way!

Janleverton · 02/06/2019 22:36

Looks like lots of houses near me (the style I mean). SE London. I go inside loads of houses for my work. You will be able to make it look great and feel like home and after the first few weeks the things that are bothering you now will not be so noticeable. Apart of course from the circuit board - but that can be dealt with through solicitors.

Original poster
DavetheCat2001 · 02/06/2019 22:42

I am in SE London..good spot!

OP posts:
MsTSwift · 02/06/2019 22:42

I spent the first 3 months of living in our Edwardian large project house crying in the garden. Was in late pregnancy but still. It was like a horrid old people’s home. 5 years later admittedly after 6 months of building work it is so stunning our photographer friend suggested hiring out for photo shoots

user1474894224 · 02/06/2019 22:46

I really hope the electrics are sorted - but as a work around - could you have an electrician lined up and recover the costs back from the purchase? - so your solicitor witholds £1000 until they are fixed by your contractor - and then passes on the remainder once the work is done with a bill to show what you spent.

(When we moved in we found filth every where, old razors in the shower, food in the fridge, the gas fire is unusable and unfixable, the built in dishwasher was broken and full of minging mouldy water, under the sink leaked - they knew as big bowl to catch the leak, rats in the loft - evidence they knew of this too.......Love the house though.)

HUZZAH212 · 02/06/2019 22:47

It'll be amazing. All that wonderful space!

AntiHop · 02/06/2019 22:54

That nonsense about the electricity is completely unacceptable. The vendor needs to sort it before you move in.

We bought a house last year. Our house is tiny, as it's all we could afford. When the removals guys left and we started to unpack, I felt so low. I had no idea how we were going to fit everything in. Once we'd settled in and worked out where to put things and make the most of the space, I felt so much better. I still wish I was in a bigger house, but can't afford it, so nothing we can do about that!

Neolara · 02/06/2019 23:05

That's going to be a completely awesome house once you've got it sorted. And because everything needs doing, you'll be able to make it exactly how you want.

Redglitter · 02/06/2019 23:12

I loved my house the moment I set foot in it for a viewing. So much so i went home and phoned the EA with an offer immediately. I was moving from a 2nd floor rented flat to my own gorgeous house with a garden parking etc- perfect

Then I moved in. I hated it. Couldnt imagine ever settling & being happy. For 2 pins id have gone back to my rented flat. That lasted maybe a week then passed completely. I fell back in love with my house & just still feel the same several years down the line.

I think it's quite common - itll pass

longtompot · 02/06/2019 23:16

It is gorgeous! Keep picturing the image you had of what it will look like when you've done all the work. Maybe they have done you a favour by ripping out the fuse box. It might have been dangerous and could have had disastrous results.

When we got the keys to our new house, I went in during the evening. The place was dark, and the kid next door was playing some drum n base on top volume, and I just imagined awful neighbours and wondered what we had done. But, the next day I came round to show my mum, and it was a gorgeous morning. We went out into the garden there was a sundog rainbow over the house. My mum said that it was a good sign, and it was. We have fab neighbours, and no loud music (apart from the odd bbq party 2 or 3 times a year).

Hope all works out for you!

GreenTulips · 02/06/2019 23:25

We lived in a similar house and I lived it! Big windows and high ceiling!

Get a log burner an big curtains and once you’ve warmed the place up it won’t feel anywhere near as cold or dark!

Can you come back when you’ve done some work?

badg3r · 02/06/2019 23:33

A house like that in SE London? It looks amazing! It needs work yes, but it will be so so wonderful when it is done up. And at 5 and 8 the kids will soon adapt. Get their rooms and the garden sorted first. The electricity problem is very strange, that us a separate issue that needs sorting, but with regards to the house itself I think w need to get in and get going, the regret feelings will pass.

Serendipper · 02/06/2019 23:44

Go on rightmove and look at the sold houses in your new street. See if any of those have pictures. Looks like a terrace so lots of the houses will be identical in layout and you can see what your house could become. Maybe show the kids too!

morallybankruptme · 02/06/2019 23:53

So many people can not afford to buy a home. Try feeling grateful instead of bitter.