Buyers remorse...tell me it's normal

[DavetheCat2001]

I've been reading back on old threads about this, it does seem to be 'a thing', but I am slightly freaking out about us moving into our new house this coming Friday.

Canned version of events: it has taken over 4 months to get here, lost a set of buyers on our place, lost a solicitor along the way, had financial issues etc..won't go into detail as not really relevant, but we REALLY wanted this house and finally exchanged last week.

Went in there yesterday morning with the kids to measure the windows for blinds, and as soon as I walked in it felt cold, dark and gloomy. It's Edwardian, and it's been empty for over a year and not loved, it's a project house and in my head could be beautiful but the truth is we are stretching ourselves to our absolute limit financially, and will have nothing left over after completion.

OH is going to do a lot of work himself (when he can fit it in working FT), and we save for things as we go.

It was such a beautiful sunny day yesterday, but walking in there was like going into a musty cave. Both DC's were bickering and youngest had a meltdown when she saw the room we were thinking of for her..stomped around the house on raw floorboards making a racket and saying she hated it etc..

OH and I have been bickering too..think the stress has got to us, and best of all it appears that the vendor has for some reason since the last time we saw the house (mid April) ripped down the fusebox in the hallway, leaving us with no working plug sockets in the house???!!?

We couldn't test the grotty oven that is being left and so as it stands we move in on Friday into a house we cannot plug in our fridge/cook anything/heat etc...fucking nightmare.

Obviously we raised this with the EA on Saturday, but in his typical fashion he never came back to us despite saying he was going to contact the vendor immediately to find out what he is doing.

So tomorrow morning we get onto our solicitor to let them know...vendor has to make good and I have said there is no way I am moving into that house on Friday with my kids if no electricity, FFS.

That would put us in breach of contract with our buyers I'm guessing, so the whole thing is a nightmare.

Came back to our light, bright flat yesterday and just wanted to cry. Been here 14 years, had my kids here and made this place lovely.

I don't want to go..what were we thinking??? We need more space for sure with 2 growing DC's (5 and 8), and I thought I loved the house but I don't think I do anymore. Rang my mum for advice and wise words and she said I was the same when I bought our current flat as it was a state too, and I apparently spent many weekends back at her house as didn't want to be here either!

Can anyone please just bring me down and reassure me that this will pass and it will all be ok?

Packers come in on Thursday to pack us up, and we have a cleaning co booked to go into the house on Thursday too to deep clean it as it is minging....obviously they cannot do this if no bloody power in the house!!

Auuugh..just want to crawl under my duvet and it all to go away.

Thanks @tethersend

Feeling like I'm ready to do this now.. spent the day de-cluttering and OH has been taking our lights down.

Packers arriving early tomorrow so it's all systems go!

EA has been round to the new house today and apparently gas and electrics all working again.

Cleaners going in tomorrow too.. I think that will make all the difference.

Brilliant news! (I'm late to the thread and dying to see pics!)

Good luck tomorrow, OP! I'm wishing you all the best (I know we all are) and popping a virtual bottle of bubbly.

Yay!!

Thank you!

Awaiting packers and wishing school started earlier as the kids are driving me round the bend.

Have a tight knot of anxiety in my stomach 😐

Have a tight knot of anxiety in my stomach 😐

Brandy's good for that. 😆 Maybe it's excitement? Butterflies in the tummy and a twisted knot of dread feel very similar, in my experience.

Brandy in the morning?? 🤪

It's def anxiety ( I suffer from it anyway).. have escaped to a cafe!

Hope it went ok. You must be in now! Hope you’re feeling better, and not sobbing through every room, kicking the walls and wailing WHAT HAVE I DONE....

But if you are, then it’d definitely not too early for brandy now. Cheers 🥃

Just read your thread. I hope you got in ok and are making it start to feel like home.

6 years ago we moved in to project house. 1930s total diet upper with a hugely problematic extension. It was the only way to afford a 4 bed with garden in catchment for the school we wanted. We just started the final phase of work this week. It's been 6 years of almost constant diy, renovations, budget stretching, with one profiler at the start and now two kids and the second about to start school.

It's been totally worth it. I love our house.

Hope you are safely in. That should be the worst of the stress over now.
You are home.

Thanks all for checking in.

We have had a brutal day.. it took hours and hours.. we had to pay extra removals costs as had far more than we thought.. then the money from the mortgage co failed to come across, so mid afternoon we were sitting in our car, outside our flat desperately calling solicitors/ broker/ finance co/EA trying to find out when we could move in. Removals guys had loaded up 2 lorries with our stuff, and needed a further lorry load so wanted to take our stuff to the new house to unload. We obviously couldn't as house wasn't ours.

Buyers money came across in a timely fashion, so for about an hour we were in the car technically homeless 😳. I was panicking and trying to make a contingency plan of who we could stay with tonight, and how we would afford storage costs for our stuff.

It pissed it down with rain all day, after weeks of sunny dry weather, and our hoover broke whilst I wastrying to clean the flat ready for the new owners. I did leave them a bottle of wine though 😊

I have cried today more than I have in a long, long time.

We are in.. OH had some tears just now having had to hold it together all day. We haven't eaten since breakfast ( just managed to bung a pizza inthe oven), and now trying to settle DS who just ' wants to go home'

Tomorrow things will seem better.. will post some pics of where we are at.. stuff everywhere, but I have had 2 bouquets of flowers from friends, and wine and champagne, so officially have the best friends in the world so I'm giving my head a wobble and keeping calm and carrying in.

This is the front room.. we have so much stuff! 😳

Glad you are in, after a sleep things will seem better in the morning.

I had to smile at this though our hoover broke whilst I was trying to clean the flat ready for the new owners.

Ours did exactly the same thing last year when we moved, just totally conked out. Oh and the movers said they had never seen as much stuff.

Though I am not sure who got the rawer deal with the weather, you with the rain or us with that ridiculous heatwave.

@DavetheCat2001 your post just reminded me that our money didn't go to our vendor when we bought our house. It was a mainly Thursday and someone at the bank ticked to say they'd sent it but hadn't. We spent an Easter weekend with literally ALL our life boxed up. Fortunately we weren't completing on the flat we were selling until a couple of weeks later so we just stayed put on a mattress on the floor. That feeling of nausea and the sobbing has all just come back.

I hope you enjoyed your champagne and I bet you'll find places for everything soon enough in your lovely big new house.

OP it will be the home you dreamed about and over the months you'll start to see things coming together. We are also owners of an 3 bed Edwardian semi, probate property so had been empty for some time as well as last being decorated by the previous owners in 1972 (floor AND ceiling wallpaper in EVERY room).

It took 2-3 months to get it liveable and that was having already had the major work done prior to moving in. So all the decorating, carpets, boarding out and insulating the loft, cleaning, stripping. It was exhausting particularly as I was getting more and more pregnant throughout.

All the other major things such as garden clearance, new roof, decking and landscaping, blocking paving to the front etc have all been planned for in stages due to logistics, time and money - it's been a huge project.

We have just had our 2 year anniversary at the house and it's completely unrecognisable from what it was. Major work wise we've only got about a 3rd of the decking to do plus landscaping and then the block paving at the front. There are also still many bits inside that we need to do but they are fiddly, messy and time consuming but they can wait as we have two young kids plus work. It will get done eventually but doesn't stop our enjoyment of the home.

We had to unexpectedly replace our kitchen before we'd planned to due to the discovery of damp and black mould last winter. We had to borrow money to get that done so can't complete anything else until that's all paid off in December 2020 😩

It'll take years to get to a stage where we consider it complete but it's still a labour of love. There is so much character in this house and a rare property in this area.

Honestly chin up and just crack on with it 👍🏼 good luck

Oh, you poor thing! That sounds like the most stressful moving day! So glad you’re in now. I’ve always enjoyed the first few dats in a brand new home so hopefully you’re going to have a fun, if frantic, weekend.

@FleetwoodStorms you know it's true

@DavetheCat2001 I am the one

People should just be grateful they have a house to live in and not on the streets. Such a first world problem
This thread

I'm amazed you had to have two lorries to clear your flat! Crikey you must have a lot. Anyway, good luck with the new house. (I inwardly shuddered when I saw you pic of your stuff piled up. We were the same. Just reminded me why I really don't ever want to move again).
@morallybankruptme - this is not a thread about homelessness. If you want to discuss that, make a thread of your own, instead of making silly comments that just serve to display the large chip on your shoulder.
.

MorallyBankrupt should be glad they have a chip on their shoulder, since so many families have nothing to eat.

Maybe so, but what's that got to do with this thread?

Morally... perhaps ‘Property’ isn’t the best section of the forum for you, if you’re so against people discussing, um, property.

Dave, it will all be fine. We’re 4 months ahead of you in a similar move - old house, massive project - and every step forward feels like a brilliant achievement. We’re slowly getting more rooms done and it’s feeling more and more like home. I absolutely love it, after a big wobble at the start!

Maybe so, but what's that got to do with this thread?

It was a joke. You know, chip - food...

I’ll get my coat.

@morallybankruptme do feel free to FO and not read the thread if it chaps your arse.

Day 3 and feeling a lot better. Had a locksmith out to fit new locks which makes me feel better and wifi now back up and running..whoop.

Cat back from the cattery today too..she is so disorientated poor thing.

Terrible weather..seems we have a leaky roof in the lean-to on the side return, so going to need to get a roofer out at some point.

All in all though I am feeling loads better. OH put up curtains in our bedroom which makes such a difference to the old bedsheets hanging there before!

Will post some new pics later this week if anyone is interested.

Glad you feel a bit better about things now, it can be so overwhelming when you move in - I just wanted to sit in a cold pool rather than be worrying about getting stuff in the house, but once we had taken stock it was much better.

It is amazing how much difference just putting things like your own curtains make.

I’d love to see some pictures! I moved some furniture round in my bedroom at the weekend and it reminded me hoe much I genuinely love the upheaval and change of moving. 😂

Glad you’re feeling better. These are exciting times!