Things you would NEVER want in your house:

[AlphaBravoHenryFoxtons]

I'll start.

A kitchen island.
A hall console table.
A corner sofa.
New rugs.

I am thinking of getting a plumbed-in Miele coffee machine.

Antumbra: if the door is shut I can never smell the burning!

I find this all fascinating, not horrid at all. I am genuinely curious as to why so many hate carpets in bathrooms. I've never known anything else from when I was a tot myself and have had it all through DCs growing up. I'm just about to put it in a new house now - what don't I know?

Carpets in bathrooms collect any available fluids and smells. When people get out of the bath/shower with wet feet, or splash water about, it takes for ever to dry and the room can end up smelling fusty.

Hell would have to freeze over before I'd have a bar, a mat round the loo, curtains with tie-backs or placemats too.

Fleas
Cockroaches
Rodents
Bedbugs
Mould
Damp

Other than that I'm not fussy and fairly glad I have a house :) Though I do have a bit of an aversion to lots of knotty pine everywhere.

only lovers - what do you have instead of placemats?

and why is the OP refusing to tell us what is wrong with "NEW RUGS". I neeeeed to know

(Is having new rugs a class thing?)

"Carpets in bathrooms collect any available fluids and smells. When people get out of the bath/shower with wet feet, or splash water about, it takes for ever to dry and the room can end up smelling fusty."

We have had carpets in bathrooms for years and they never smelt fusty. They were proper bathroom carpets and we have never had a problem with bodily fluids on the carpet as we are all very careful.

That said, when the carpet needed replacing we replaced it with cushionfloor.

Well, you lot would just adore our house!

We live with my very elderly mum in my childhood home, which boasts amongst other treasures:

Magnolia-painted woodchip wallpaper. Swirly-patterned carpets.

Kitchen with fitted units (1960s) and lino floor.

Bathroom with pink 1970s bathroom suite (inc. bidet!), baroque burgundy wallpaper, pedestal mats, toilet brush, tiled bath-surround, shower over bath (hence shower curtains) and carpet tiles on the floor.

Out bedroom has floral wallpaper and 2 HUGE wardrobes

Living room with enormous leather 2 piece suite and smoked glass-topped coffee table and pouffe (early 1970s designer Danish though - does this count as fashionably retro?) and a gurt big flat-screen telly.

We have slugs and sometimes wasp nests and occasionally mice. And some bastard magpies have built a nest in one of the chimney-pots noisy noisy bastards

The house is a complete mish-mash of styles and periods, including a lot of Victorian antiques picked up for nowt at auctions in the 1950s when my parents were first married and skint, and some wonderful 1970s stuff when they had money to buy new. Mum is 86 and extremely resistant to changing anything in the house, so it's just as well DH and I are simply not pretentious up-our-own-arses shallow bovvered enough to get all all precious about 'style' and we enjoy the luxury of feeling smug about not caring about what is currently fashionable. And not spending actual money on re-decorating or replacing perfectly functional stuff with new stuff. We just buy more pictures and book-cases and rugs off eBay to hide the wallpaper and carpets!

lapsed I imagine my children's generation will grow up and describe with horror their parents' awful houses with island units, conservatories, metro tiles, ' keep calm' trinkets . This will be countered with a 'well, my mother's house is top toe in bloody scandi- chic' or ' god, mine has a horrible white high gloss kitchen circa 2015' etc etc.
Plus ca change.....

I actually think your house sounds rather fabulous lapsed! More my cup of tea than a chocolate brown sofa from Next.

A deep fat fryer.
Carpet in the bathroom.
Chinese fucking rugs!!!!!!
China cabinets full of absolute tat that means nothing and is worthless.

Ruler, plates on the table. I do have a motley selection of mats/stands for hot serving dishes though. PS love your username!

Bun, there must have not been proper bathroom carpet in the houses I've lived in because fusty carpet was very much a problem. In fact I didn't even know you could GET proper bathroom carpet, so live and learn.

I still like tiled or other hard bathroom floors though; just prefer the look, innit.

I want to know about new rugs too. OP wasn't the only one who said it

Feeling a bit worried about my beams . If I have them removed the house will fall down.

Dogs. Last time I was round at my NDN's her dog was continually wiping its bottom on her carpet? How revolting is that?! (I like dogs, I just don't want to live with one!)

Dark wood kitchen units - they make me feel depressed

Huge portraits hung of ponced up Mum lying half naked on a chaise longue with a boa and looking totally unlike the actual person

Ceiling beams - again they make me feel depressed

Wood work surfaces in kitchen

Plug in air fresheners. Obviously hiding some awful smell like arse wiping dog.

So do I Only. We inherited the bathroom carpet, but much prefer the cushionfloor that we have now.

Just have to comment again. Also not sure about the new rugs thing?!
I would feel more icky about having old rugs! Ones that people have already walked their sweaty feet all over, had their food and drink spilled on, (or even, in response to a previous poster, their dog wipe it's arse all over!)

A conservatory
A reclining armchair - eeew. Go to bed if you want to stretch out!
A "bar area"
A wallpapered "feature" wall
A deep fat fryer
A display cabinet filled with photos / ornaments
A bidet

My mum's house has a high gloss white kitchen from c. 1990. She keeps going on about how it'll never date, but it's been very dated for a long time.

New rugs: I just dislike them. I didn't say the things we would NEVER want in our houses should be rational.

New rugs always seem unnecessarily thick so you have to step up onto them and descend down off of them at the other end. What is that all about? And they are always 160M X 240M (+ or - 10cm) which is pathetic given we all seem to have knocked down walls to created big open plan spaces. I have bought new rugs on various occasions only to discard them after a few months because they work their way across the room, the corners curl up, they are a trip hazard in front of your fireplace/next to your bed/in your hallway. I prefer my ancient rugs because they lay flat on the ground, the ends don't curl up, and they continue to look good even when my lilac duvet cover and matching curtains has done its worst.

Here you go, a 100% polypropylene www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Viala-Modern-Ivory-Lilac-Burgundy-Wilton-Rugs-Flower-Design-160x230cm-OW-1521U-/251246338557 I challenge anyone to buy this rug and still love it in two years.

We are getting our new rugs made by the handmade rug company. They will be rather huge (big open plan living) not very thick and lay on top of wooden floors. That's an ugly rug Alpha, but not all new rugs are like that obviously.

I must add that my mother has passed on one of her antique rugs to me, so I'm not against them either apart from the bloody moths

Floral feature wall
Concrete coloured grey walls
Vertical blinds

We do have a corner sofa - a proper one, not one with a silly long cushion so there's only 2 seats that work with your back supported and your feet on the floor. It's fab, though I do still end up sat in one corner with the boys squeezed up either side of me.

I'm just not fond of rugs at all. I like fitted carpet in the living room and bedrooms and hard floors elsewhere (rug free)