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Original poster

Bought house with parents, now they want their money back in one go.

187 replies

DreamlessSleep · 08/10/2013 11:46

My mum and step dad suggested that they helped us buy a house 5 years ago when our landlord was selling the house we were in, but now they want all their money back in one go (70,000 I don't begrudge them for wanting it but think they could have gone about it in a different way) and obviously we don't have this. We tried remortgaging but they won't take their names off the mortgage therefore we cant as they are now deemed too old to be on our mortgage.

Are there any other options I have not thought of apart from from selling? (Which is the option it looks like we will have to go for at the moment.) We were naive when we bought it and in hindsight we should have stuck to renting.

OP posts:
IrisWildthyme · 08/10/2013 13:12

It's fair enough to want their money back - things can change a lot in 5 years and if there's a different thing they want to do with their assets then that ought to be allowed. Obviously it's a shame that they aren't going to stick to their "Pay it back when you are in a position to" which you might have reasonably expected them to despite not having anything in writing, but that bit is not worth falling out over. The crazy thing is them not understanding that having-£70k-invested-in-the-house and having-their-names-on-the-deeds are two inseparable things that go hand-in-hand, they cannot have one without the other. IF you can get access to £70k, you cannot, should not and must not give it to them without their names coming off the deeds.

Is your own financial standing now enough to support a mortgage on the current sum + £70k?

Bamaluz · 08/10/2013 14:00

They can't expect to keep a share in the house if they get their money back. It's that simple.
Another way of looking at it is that you would be buying their share off them. Would they understand that better?

HaveToWearHeels · 08/10/2013 14:22

Depends how much you want this house ?. If the house is sold, they will get 25% each of the profit in the property after all fee's are paid, that way they will certainly loose out. As will you. You need to weigh up how much you put down and how much you will loose.
They invested in property and it didn't pay off, simple as. I have invested in property, and had to ride out any crash, maybe you should suggest they do the same.

TheFabulousIdiot · 08/10/2013 14:26

Have you tried saying 'ok, we'll put it on the market this week'?

Bluegrass · 08/10/2013 15:13

How is the legal title held, hopefully tenants in common at 25% each and not as joint tenants?

This is not a loan, a loan would need to be declared up front to the mortgage company as a condition of them making their own loan. They have bought 50% of an asset. If you sell they get 50% of what is left after sharing costs, which at the moment means they lose money. If you buy them out you should similarly offer 50% of the property's current value (again, they make a loss). In either case they have no more interest in the property and their names must come off the deeds. From that point onwards the risk of owning that property is all yours, and if the value increases the rewards are also all yours. They can't get something for nothing!

WhatWillSantaBring · 08/10/2013 20:02

Another thing to consider sadly is stamp duty- if they take their name off the mortgage then you have to pay SDLT on their section- though at only £70k it might come under the threshold. Possibly a compromise would be to say you will return the full £70k but only if they take their names off- ie you treat the £70k as a loan rather than a shared investment.

Agree you could do better finding a friendly but neutral mediator - trusted friend or family member? Family feuds could cost more (in emotions!) than the amounts at stake so worth trying all "nice" approaches first!

TiredFeet · 08/10/2013 20:09

you need to go and speak to a solicitor. they can advise you on the structure of how you own the property and the implications and options you have now. That doesn't mean things need to get nasty, just that you need to be clear what the legal position is.

Original poster
DreamlessSleep · 08/10/2013 23:16

Thanks for all the advice. Just got back from work. Have taken it on board. Will be having a meeting (hopefully a nice oone) in the morning.

OP posts:
IrisWildthyme · 11/10/2013 07:37

Hi Dreamless have you had any progress?

Original poster
DreamlessSleep · 11/10/2013 12:42

We had a chat on weds and decided to sell. Much as I like this house its just not worth all the hassle. Im a bit sad but the longer it goes on the more problems its going to cause.

OP posts:
HaveToWearHeels · 11/10/2013 15:25

I hope they are going to take a hit on the investment they made. It is not fair if you take the whole lot.

IrisWildthyme · 11/10/2013 23:04

Sorry to hear you'll have to move but I'm glad that you have come to an agreement with them without falling out. Good luck getting through the bumpy road to a sale and eventual resolution!

BrownSauceSandwich · 12/10/2013 08:19

Just caught up with this. Dreamless, if I were you, I would be fucking furious with my parents for putting me in this position. And frankly, I wouldn't be letting go of a 50% share of the proceeds. It started as 50/50, but since then you and your other half have paid off some part of the mortgage (let's call it X. May not be huge, but your parents haven't contributed to that.) So the ratio of ownership is actually you: £70K+X; parents: £70K. I'd divide up what's left from the sale, minus fees, in those terms.

They probably won't like that, but if they're forcing you to sell the house, you have to treat them like the co-owners/investors they want to be. If they want to consider it a straight-up loan, then you remortgage IN YOUR AND HUSBANDS NAMES ONLY, you give them back their £70k, they have NO MORE INTEREST IN YOUR HOUSE.

They can't have it both ways. I'm sorry it's a source of discord for you, but please don't rip yourself and your husband off to satisfy somebody else's unfair demands.

Original poster
DreamlessSleep · 12/10/2013 10:47

Thanks for all your support. Brownsauce I am am actually quite cross but I feel like I shouldnt be. Mum just came over to take ds out and I coukd barely even even look at her. I know they want their money back but think they could have been much nicer about it. It is going to take a while to get over this I think.

Tbh I just want to give them as much back as poss and walk away, even if that means leaving with nothing. I dont want to feel like they have us over a barrel any more and I dont want to owe them anything. Im just so drained right now.

OP posts:
RandomMess · 12/10/2013 10:52

I'm sorry that your parents have put you in this position, I think your life will actually much easier though once you have ended all financial ties with them, they sound a bit erm selfish in that respect.

Original poster
DreamlessSleep · 12/10/2013 10:55

Hoping so RandomMess. plus we were supposed to be hosting Christmas day here for them, but the way I feel right now I dont really want to.

OP posts:
RandomMess · 12/10/2013 10:56

Well perhaps create a bit of distance for a while, tell them you can't host anymore as you'll have the house staged for selling!

Original poster
DreamlessSleep · 12/10/2013 11:02

Yes. I dont think it will be happening. I just cant envisage dh but but particularly me being able to sit through a whole day with them.

OP posts:
HaveToWearHeels · 12/10/2013 17:49

I don't blame you Dreamless, I think it will be very difficult to forgive them for this, afterall they are technically making you (their daughter) and their grandchild homeless. I know you didn't want to fall out with them but this this is unavoidable.

Original poster
DreamlessSleep · 12/10/2013 20:25

Havetowearheels they just seem so uncaring about it all. She has phoned me to ask me if we've seen anywhere nice to rent. Hmm

OP posts:
Liara · 12/10/2013 21:41

If they want it to be sold, the price will now be 27k less than it was. Any debt outstanding will have to be paid in full, so the loss will come entirely out of any equity that exists.

In the absence of any contracts to the contrary, that equity will be divided equally between the four owners of the property.

You and your dh can put in an offer to buy the property at its current price, using your parts of the equity and a mortgage.

You will probably end up better off than you would have done otherwise.

RenterNomad · 12/10/2013 22:11

Is legal cover included with your mortgage bundle (you know, the life insursnce, etc.). That could be a way of getting some "good" advuce, not just 39mins of "free"/ initial consultation advice.

Original poster
DreamlessSleep · 13/10/2013 12:52

Im not sure on that one, I will ask dh later as he probably knows that.

OP posts:
Original poster
DreamlessSleep · 18/10/2013 11:55

Thought I'd pop back to add the new development, a friends ex has offered us the very lowest acceptable offer on our house. Its all happening a bit quicker than I'd like.

OP posts:
MummytoMog · 18/10/2013 12:11

Don't accept. If someone has offered quickly, then someone else will probably offer more and you shouldn't have to lose out. I'm enraged on your behalf.

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