WWYD, difficult choice re selling MILs house

[sweetkitty]

Background, MIL died July 2009, left her house to DP and SIL equally. House didn't officially go on the market until July 2010 as it took forever to get it up to spec for selling. We live an hours drive away and have 4 young DC including a young baby, SIL lives 5 mins away, is on her own with on 17 year old still at home so naturally a lot of stuff to do with the house has fallen with SIL although we have helped out where we can.

The thing is say the house was valued at 100K for simplicity. We dropped the price to 95K a few months ago since had 2 viewers.

We are about to start a much needed extension to our own house but cannot until MILs house is sold. The house next door is up for sale at 10K more although it is in a better decorative state.

We are paying house insurance every month for the house as well and I feel the longer it is on the market the less it will appeal to buyers.

The thing is SIL is hesistant to sell the house well we believe it wouldn't even be on the market if it weren't for us pushing it.
I don't think it is the emotional side of things just that she is completely useless at sorting things out. It's just a desperate situation and we don't know where next to go with it.

I have suggested lowering the house another 5K to a Fixed Price to attract buyers, we know SIL won't be keen but if it's about money we would pay the difference if it sells IYSWIM?

SIL buying us out? She has already hinted that she would use the money to invest in another property to rent out. Obviously we would sell our half below the market value but I don't know how she will take it.

She has suggested putting in a new kitchen and bathroom which aren't modern granted but aren't old either. I think it would be spending money we wouldn't recoup.

We really need this house sold but don't want to upset SIL either, just looking for some advice?

Oh dear. Sounds very tough all round. She's maybe a little bit odd when it comes to houses and house repairs?

It may be easier for your DSiL when the house is sold even though she's not going to lift a finger to get you there.

I think you're right that your DH had better just go down and sort it.

Look, I am sorry to be harsh, but your sil does not sound like the only person with her head in the sand. You are ONLY an hour away, and have not seen the house since it went on the market, like more than 9 months ago?

I think you both need to be a little proactive and do what it takes to get the house in shape for sales.
No wonder the agent is not pushing viewers through the door, it might reflect badly upon them, to be honest!

If you are that desperate to sell, you cant just sit on your hands and expect a person who you KNOW is lax to sort things for you, especially since she is not keen to sell it, for whatever reason.

The longer you wait, the more it will get into disrepair, and the more it will cost you. Arrange a gardener, arrange a deep clean, arrange for a decorator to apply a coat of paint, steam clean or refit new carpets/laminate flooring, keep an exact record of your expenses and keep all receipts, and deduct this from the final sales price, so you get your money back. Dont bother with the bathroom and the kitchen. The buyers will most likely want to put in the bathroom/kitchen of their choice, if the price is right and reflect that these rooms need updating.

Sorry, but I agree with Quint. She' basically saved me the effort of typing it. She was also slightly more polite than me.

I have steel capped boots if you need a kick up the bum!? [bugrin]

How come you didn't go and see the house in 9months?! We sold my grans house last year after she died. Went on the market, first viewing next day. Sold.

I sorted it all. I live 2hrs away and at that time I had a 4yr old and a 6month old. I often left the children at home with their dad while I sorted things at weekends, skips, gardening, cleaning, council and charity collections of donations.

You could have got more done. Why doesn't your dh go up there on his own?

I agree with other posters. Plus, if the EA doesn't open on a Saturday and hasn't been helpful, you really need to get a new one.

i think that you need to get some other agents in and take some advice. they will tell you if spending money on decoration etc is worth it. some friends were in a similar situation and the estate agents advice was to clear the house and then put it on as it was- there was a maximum price that those particular bungalows etc go for and people would rather put their own bathroom/kitchen in etc.

the question i would throw at you is what would you/dp do if he was an only child? it might not be easy being an hour away and with 4dcs but it is not impossible to sort this out.

work out what you would do if he was an only child, do it and tell his sister that is what happening.

book a saturday off on the calender- get 2 or 3 agents to come look- and he can spend the day cleaning. if it is so desperate to get extension built or whatever, he is going to have to put the time in.

Thanks for all your messages, however harsh, FWIW I am of the same opinion that we need to get our finger out and get it sorted. DP has seen the house quite a few times in the past 9 months but he said it wasn't as bad as it is now. I said to him that if it were mine only I would be paying for a gardener and would have paid to have it deep cleaned. I would have also bought cheapish neutral carpets for the upstairs, DP said we have no money to shell out on carpets (!) I disagree as someone said it could be taken off the final price.

It would be a lot easier if he was an only child, we wouldn't feel we were treading on SILs toes all the time. When we told her we were going to see the house on Friday she said everything she could to put us off going, right down to saying it was a bit overcast. She wants to do everything about the house but then doesn't get around to doing it. For instance she noticed the for sale sign had come down in the front garden (she drives by the house every day), one 5 minute phonecall to the EA and it would be sorted, no she moans about it to DP and now DP has to phone the EA. DP cannot arrange a new EA etc without her say so and she doesn't want to so she makes herself uncontactable or disagrees. DP is going down on Friday to sort out the garden a bit and give the carpets a good clean.