were into september not long now frantic label sewing, shoe buying and general getting organised and breath!!

[bodenaddict]

hi ladies here is our new thread

My DD's also a slow eater and misses a lot of play. The TA said she's always sitting the longest eating all on her own. I've started putting a bit less in her lunch - as I always put in too much so she can pick and chose. I'm also wondering if she's lingering on her lunch on purpose to avoid the playground ..... I hope not.

I really felt for her this morning, nothing in particular - just the day to day, ongoing drudgery that is going to school.

I helped in the class on wednesday morning, and really enjoyed it, so I'll do that each week. I was nervous and most concerned that I would be in the way/hanging about. But I did feel really useful to them.

ihearttc, awww Joseph! You'll cry!
Aranea, I hope your DD's okay, and gets her confidence back. I'm hoping for fun things this term (children in need today, christmas things etc) maybe similar stuff will help your DD.
Golgi, you've got enough reports to write then !
Moodlum, I hope he's getting better from the tonsilitis now he's got the antibiotics.
Tree, it's funny how bad a 20p can make you feel.

Tree - how awful about the 20p! What a poignant image. Isn't it amazing how much guilt we can heap on ourselves?

ihearttc - that's gorgeous about him being Joseph! Aww.

Another slow eater here, too... dd1 tells me she is often the last one left eating, and is still there when the Year 1s come in for their lunch. Apparently they talk 'a lot of nonsense'.

I'm feeling a bit sick right now, as after a chat with dd1 this evening I have come to the conclusion that she is actually being bullied by ex-friend. Apparently this girl is unpleasant to her every day and says spiteful things to her and about her. I am planning to speak to the teacher on Monday. I do so hope she takes it seriously - she is a lovely woman but it is her first job and she is quite fluffy. I am feeling rather shaky at the thought that poor dd1 is so withdrawn at school because of one spiteful girl, and I am desperately worried that there won't be much the school can do. Though I have just looked at their bullying policy, and the behaviour definitely fits their definition of bullying.

I have told dd1 that she must tell a teacher every single time the other girl is mean to her, as I don't think the teacher is aware of it at all.

Oh Aranea, that's just exactly what we all dread for our little ones. And so soon at the start of her school experience . But you're onto it now, so here's hoping it can get sorted very quickly.
I hope you and your DD have a nice weekend together.

Aranea - refer to their policy when talking to the teacher. The school have to take action. If no joy with teacher, go to head. There are lots of things the school can and should do. Hope you and teacher can sort it quickly between you.

Son is another slow eater, but they have lunch in two sittings so only have 30 minutes max - and he doesn't like to be left eating alone so "finishes" when the other children on the table do.

The other day he said "I ate all of my sandwiches today" and I was very pleased with him, not so pleased with Daddy when I found out that the reason for this was due to the sandwich content....chocolate spread!

I suppose I should be grateful that I don't have to make the packed lunches in the morning (I have to leave for work an hour before husband, so it's his job).

Oh Aranea. Big hand hold from all of us, you must feel so so sick. Awfull. Get the bully policy and stick to your guns.

Thanks for the support. (and sorry if there are any typos - dd2 has done something mysterious and now the text is tiny!)

Courtesy of dd2's cold I was awake a lot last night and spent much of it worrying about dd1. golgi - what should I expect from the school? I want to make sure we go straight to some kind of action rather than the teacher just saying she'll keep an eye on it or something, as the TA did already speak to the other girl after the half term break and it obviously hasn't made a difference.

Aranea - hope you get good support from the school. I'm also curious as to how the school would actually handle this situation.

Aranea - I don't know much about primary schools I'm afraid. But if a parent came into my (secondary) school with concerns about bullying then the head of year would start by talking to the students involved separately, then if appropriate getting them together to try to solve issues. A bit different when they're 15 to when they're 5 though, obviously.

I think if it's clearly making Aranea junior miserable then more is needed than "keeping an eye on it" as girl X is unlikely to say unpleasant things when teacher is watching anyway!

Hi all.

Ironing uniforms and panicking about what on earth to create a packed lunch from. We have been away, have been worried about how tired dd has been, and not sleeping well. But slept from 6 on the drive home, carried her into bed at 6.30 when we got back, and she is still zonked so hoping a good 12-13 hours will put some colour in her cheeks.

She has eaten 3 wheetabix, 2 slices of toast and 1/2 tin beans all weekend. Totally exhausted.

Aranea, I think a formalised meeting is required now really. Maybe also start a diary of the things dd says, as a document to show the regularity of what is going on.
Perhaps ask the teacher in the morning for a meeting at some point that day or Tuesday at the latest? I think the message needs to get across that this is more than a few 'sharing issues' or the usual stuff. That you have serious concerns, have read the bullying policy and feel it is time the tools the school use to work on bullying are put in place.

Totally agree that the 3 min drop off chat and 'will keep an eye on it' won't do.

Hopefully if teacher is new and fluffy she will be happy to refer to head for support, which might be a good thing in fact. More people actively monitoring and investigating this the better I say!

Good luck for Monday folks. Not too long till the holidays.

I had a big proper chat with the teacher this morning. She is going to speak to both girls individually, and then do a whole-class chat about being nice to each other. I really hope it sorts it. Dd is so reluctant to go to school now, which is such a shame after her very positive start.

I feel horrid atm though. Just all icky and bleugh inside. (aren't I articulate today?) The teacher basically said I was clearly over-anxious about dd and was affecting her confidence. I really really don't think this is the case. I work very hard to be positive about school with dd, and not to ask questions that will provoke negative answers. I know it isn't actually important that the teacher thinks I'm nice and sane, but it would be helpful I think, and pleasanter for me. Still, I suppose their bullying policy has now kicked in and if they think I'm a neurotic mother they'll just have to suck it up.

Thats fantastic that she is going to have a chat with them and with the whole class as well but it shouldn't have had to come to that should it. Really hope your dd starts to feel happier soon.

I can't believe that the teacher said you were over anxious...just because you are concerned about your little girl. Pay absolutely no attention to her-every single one of us would have done exactly the same thing.

DS is having school dinner today as a bit of an experiment to see if he'll actually eat something cause last week he didn't eat any of his packed lunch at all. Gave his money to teacher this morning and said he was a bit worried about it as didn't know exactly what he had to do and she looked at me as if I'd gone completely mad...so can completely understand the feeling like a neurotic mother cause I feel like that most of the time!

Am trying to sort out the rest of the christmas presents but really can't get the enthusiasm this year. Went to try and find a Joseph costume yesterday as DS is adament he won't wear the school one because it smells funny but all the ones I found were either red and gold which seems an odd colour for Joseph or there was a blue one in Tesco which was Joseph/shepherd. We only have 1 supermarket in our town which is Tesco so can see all the shepherds having that one so think I need to hunt out another one from somewhere...if he's going to be Joseph I at least want everyone to know he is Joseph and not a shepherd lol!!

Glad it went well Aranea, apart from the over anxious comment , what a thing to say!

Iheartttc - Ebay? My answer to everything..
cgi.ebay.co.uk/SHEPHERD-JOSEPH-INN-KEEPER-Nativity-COSTUME-S-4-5-6-Y_W0QQitemZ390121067298QQcmdZView ItemQQptZUKClothesChildrensFancyDressRL?hash=item5ad5071322#ht1434wt939

" over-anxious about dd and was affecting her confidence"
At least the ball is rolling to sort it and the teacher will be having more of an eye out. A teacher's chat should be enough for the other girl to think about being kind.
I hope things turn around for you DD now.

Well I'm glad you have some action being taken but sorry you were made to feel bleagh. I get quite anxious talking to the teachers which is very weird considering I have been a teacher myself.

and [hmmm]

There is no need for it is there. Harumph. Can't believe she actually said you are over anxious. Actually said it. Think what you like but that's something not to say. Are you tempted to comment [can you tell I would be ] along the lines of 'having thought about your pov that I am too anxious and affecting dd's experience of school, I have reflected and can only say that my praise, support of school and open ears policy on all her thoughts, have had nothing but a positive effect on dd. On the otherhand the snide, unpleasant and sometimes frightening experiences she is having at the school it's self seem to be having the opposite effect. Perhaps this is why she discloses her feelings to me rather than to the school, plus of course I have known her 5 years.....'

tree - I'd love to be able to say that.

Thank you all for being so nice. paisley - I hope you're right that a teacher's chat will sort it. I am a bit doubtful, as the TA did speak to the other girl at the start of this half term, and it clearly didn't make any difference.

Still, positive attitude and all that... or failing that, more cake.

Have fun with the Joseph costume, ihearttc. That ebay one is very sweet - I sort of wish our school was doing a traditional nativity (even though I'm not Christian).

Pfft to "over anxious".
What are you supposed to do, just sit back and let her get bullied?

Am cross on your behalf.

I would never tell a parent they were being over-anxious (even though I might think it!)
Completely unhelpful.

Did you tell her you think she's ineffective?

Aranea - "over anxious"? Thats a terrible thing to say to a parent. And also, completely pointless - what does saying it actually achieve ? I hope its being sorted out, but I think Tree's point on keeping a diary is a good one. Also, if nothing gets done - as well as talking to the Head, I'd also talk to the Governors - there should be a parent Governor. But hopefully that's not needed.

DS is finally better. These things take so long to weedle out of them - a week he's been ill. Hopefully he hasn't missed too much. Its nice to have the house to myself again, but I did feel sad this morning - I hate him being ill, but I love just spending the day having cuddles, and it does feel a bit like it did at the beginning of the year all over again.

ihearttc - I know you only have a Tesco, but apparently asda have brilliant nativity costumes for only £8, so if you have someone who could send you one, that might help? DD and her friend will mainly be matching asda shepherds this year (although I'll probably have to add some form of pink/sparkly stuff - DD is shocked not to have some kind of angel/ballet dancer/barbie type costume)

Thank you-there is an Asda 20 miles away so me and DH are going christmas shopping tomorrow so will pop in there then! Main problem is that DS is rather solid and would need a 7-8 costume and most of them seem to be 3-4 or 5-6 but will see!

DS's teacher is off sick today so expected a meltdown from him this morning cause he doesn't do change but he really surprised me and was fine with it.

He had school dinner yesterday after not eating his packed lunch last week and was so happy and smiley when I picked him up whereas he is normally mega grumpy (which I think is due to lack of food!)...might be a coincidence so we'll see what happens today.

I think sparkly shepherds would be fantastic! The little girl who DS adores and who he wanted to be mary with him is apparently going to be the Inn Keeper and she is not a happy bunny!

DD's class are doing some kind of nativity with aliens but she doesn't know what her part is yet. She says she doesn't want to be an alien and thought perhaps she could be Jesus I said that would probably be a baby doll and also, Jesus was a boy.

Glad to hear moodlum jnr is feeling better.

'ello - just checking in after a long absence!

It sounds like the nativiy plays will be good fun for all of you especially with a few aliens thrown in for free, Acinonyx!

Seeing as French education is secular there is no Nativity for us instead the 'school play' comes at the end of the year. So I have to wait until the summer for that lump in throat and wet cheek moment!

We had a rather lovely e-mail last night - DD has been invited to a Christmas party that one of her classmates is having - it is always reassuring when your child gets invited to someones house - however, for some reason I felt completely over the top proud of her! It is funny, sometimes little things like that, actually really touch me as a parent in a deep and profound way!

moodlum, glad to hear mini moodlum is better. Both of my girls are full of snot and misery at the moment. Yuck. BTW I think you need to go for full-on spangly lurex disco shepherds. It would be fabulous.

tea - how lovely. I would be so chuffed.

I'm feeling a bit more positive today, as dd1 seems to have had a really good day. We had a friend over to play, and they were both very bouncy about it. And best of all, she mentioned in a wonderfully off-hand way that she had played a bit with X today. So not only was X nice to her, which is great, but also and possibly even more significantly, dd1 wasn't all overwhelmed and full of 'X let me play with her!!' which would always have been her reaction in the past. So I presume the teacher must have had some quality chats with them both. Hooray.

Yay!! That's great Aranea, what a relief for you.

Hello Tea!

OO we had the traveling crib home last night. Can you imagine such a concept. Hysterical. Very cute though.

They are invited to make a diary entry of where it went and what it dod,a dn also to say a prayer. Also to make their own up. DD's was 'Dear God, Thank you for your love today. Please send more tomorrow'

Made me chuckle.

Every invite dd gets makes me warm and fuzzy Tea. Am loving aliens in the nativity.

I think boy might be a shepherd. No official word about a costume, but shepherds are easy-ish, aren't they?