were into september not long now frantic label sewing, shoe buying and general getting organised and breath!!

[bodenaddict]

hi ladies here is our new thread

Aranea - did your dd make up with her friend? I tried not to ask dd about friends yesterday but I just couldn't help myself.

norfolk - that is really infuriating. Totally agree that all children are unkind occaisionally - and it was really a very small thing and could have been dealt with much more gently all round.

Oh I know, dd hates colouring.She finds it so tedious. Although she is happy to try harder and finish a picture for praise from the teacher. But not for it's own ends. She is chomping at the bit to get doing sums and so on. The school seem to be waiting for half term. Or maybe she is writing and doing sums all day but doesn't say anything Could be!

I think you have fair concerns, and could also have little concerns about the handling of this tbh. Not major major but enough to ask for a formal 10 min talk with staff. Hearing that the other girl is too lovely to be unkind - as in your boy isn't? I have issues with that sort of thing tbh, as it is judgeing and type casting. In the first half term! I feel all children need to feel heard, including nice ones, perfect ones, hooligans more lively ones, loud ones....they all need to have their space to say their bit in non challenging surroundings. So the truth as they see it can be got at.

A teacher will be along shortly to give you a sensible opinion

I was also a tefl teacher in previous lives .

You can see I was a bad one. Look how I spell soap!!!! ROFL!!

norfolklass, that sounds horrible. As another who has opinions well beyond her experience and qualifications, I think it sounds very badly handled. I can't see any sense in interrogating a 7yo over what was probably a very throwaway comment made the previous day. Whether she said what he thought or not, she probably couldn't remember. It doesn't seem a situation where a forensic examination of the truth is necessary really. Surely they should just have listened to your ds sympathetically and suggested that next time he has a problem with another child it would be best to deal with it at the time?

Acinonyx, thanks for asking, the pain goes on.... the next day they seemed to be good friends again, but this morning I left dd1 very wretched because X didn't want to sit next to her. I wish I could persuade her to move on and stop obsessing about X, but there doesn't seem to be anything I can do about it.

roundabout, I hope your dd is OK and bounces back soon! Lovely that she is getting on so well now and that the older girls are petting her!

Aranea-thank you thats exactly what I thought. Tbh I couldn't care less if the little girl said it or not ( Im not the sort of parent to get worried over something a child said) all children say silly things but I think an in depth interrogation over a very small incident was extremely over the top. All the teacher had to say was "well that wasn't a very nice thing to say was it?" or something like that.
It did all happen the same day though-apparently at morning playtime all the full time children have to go in the big playground with the older ones and the part timers get to stay in the small reception playground so DS went to say hello to this little girl who he must have spoken to before if not he wouldn't have known her name and she say that he was a "stupid idiot" so after they went in from playtime he mentioned to the teacher what she'd said and the next minute it seems like it was something from CSI!

Actually feel sorry for the little girl as well because like you said it was probably just a throwaway comment which wasn't meant at all but because all the reception children are having it drummed into them on a daily basis that they must be kind/considerate etc my DS thought he'd just tell his teacher (who incidentally up until now has been lovely) what had happened>

Hope you can sort your DD friendship issues out-its really hard isn't it cause you just want to make it all ok and for me its the first time that Ive not been able to!

Sorry, I misunderstood the sequence of events. But completely agree with you that his teacher could have just made him feel better really. Your poor little ds, it all sounds very unfair and probably rather overwhelming.

Norfolk - Your poor ds just wanting the situation to go away. What a big thing's been made of a throwaway comment. It's not very reassuring how it has been dealt with & must be very upsetting for both children involved.

Aranea - sorry the pain goes on Blimey. This is tough no? Has she made any other friends you could kidnap invite for a playdate? To re focus her energies. Poor love

I know-I just want to cry for him. He never makes a fuss about anything really...he had a huge red mark on his neck on friday cause 1 of the other boys pulled his jumper round his neck and sort of tired to strangle him but he didn't say anything tot he teacher and tbh he probably wouldn't have said anything to me if I hadn't have noticed it. He just deals with it himself and basically wants to be friends with everyone so to see him so sad its awful.

I honestly don't know why he then turned round and said he made it up but I just think he must have been completely overwhelmed by it all...his teacher,the other little girl and a TA all questioning him must have been very scary and it was all over something so silly. Goodness knows what would have happened if something really serious had gone on...brought a judge in perhaps?????

Am counting down the minutes to half term now...can't wait!

Yes tree, I have been frantically organising playdates with other children, but dd1 only really has eyes for X. She is very faithful...

Aw Aranea... At least she has you to look after her and protect her and ease her into it all.

Def have a mini meeting norfolklass, if you want to. Set the tone and all that..

Hello everyone

I had a lovely child free weekend in London. It felt almost like being young again - we got drunk at lunchtime, we went to the cinema, we ponced around shops, bought make up la la la la laa . And dh did the school run on Monday so that was fun to miss, and on return everyone was pleased (ish) to see me again!

God these last few days before half term are a battle against completely giving in, counting the days left of clean socks, spending ages waking them up in the morning and then persuading them to go to school. Its exhausting. Cannot wait to do very little next week including LIE IN BED IN THE MORNING.

Norfolk lass - so sorry to hear about your ds. I wd deffo be going in to see the teacher and talk to them about it.

Aranea - if its any consolation (and I doubt it will be), DD (now in y1) has had an unrequited friendship triangle for the last year, and suddenly she just seems to have moved on. its so hard while it lasts - and tbh I'm not entirely sure this one is much better - but it does pass, and new friendships will be made. Especially if you slightly force the issue with playdates with other people. Girls's friendships are incredibly complicated and they can be such "itches"

Oh am so so so so so so so at that description of your weekend, though happy for you naturally.

Take another

Thanks moodlum, that helps

I too am unbelievably at your weekend. How lovely.

Today I had to lock myself in the living room so my dd2's screams didn't drown out what the GP was saying on the phone, after dd1 scratched herself in the eye with a letter-shapes kit. It hasn't been what you'd call relaxing.

mmmm, thank you. What a good idea.

received and understood

Aranea. I hope you are drinking the wine Tree passed you. I just had a small bit massive slab of malt loaf with butter on, and i have to say that for cheering up purposes, its pretty hard to beat.

I've been eating chocolate.

Norfolklass - I agree with others that school didn't handle it well. I am a teacher, but have no experience of teaching anyone under the age of 11, so don't assume I have any insider knowledge!

Two days left. We may just make it.
Boy seems fine, it's me who has had enough!

I want moodlum's weekend.

norfolklass, awww I hope your DS is doing okay. That's so sweet and sad - I can see how that would happen, being overwhelmed and backing down.

Aranea, your poor DD. At preschool the friendships were so easy and open but now all of a sudden they have got really complicated and more important. I hope she's okay.

moodlum

DD's gone in today. (she probably could've gone yesterday - but I wanted to be sure). I'm glad she's getting a couple of days in before they break up.....otherwise I think it'd be just too long and we'd be back to crying on the way in.
My DH is playing guitar for her class this afternoon (they're having a music festival thing, and he's a guitarist) which has worked out well and got her through the gates easily.
I think she'd been hoping to have a couple of children running up to her having missed her (as she's been talking about a couple of them a lot) - but no one did....they've all been getting on with it. I'm hoping she gets back in the loop by playtime.

Our half term starts tomorrow whoooop whoooop (as my young trendy cousin says on facebook after anything mildly exciting) - There is a new film out over 'ere about a little school boy 'Le Petit Nicholas'. I think I will take dd to see it on Friday night to celebrate me just about surviving the first half term uuuuuuggg her very successful first half term at school!

How is all the PTAing going? At dd's school they don't have a PTA but instead class reps. I made noises about perhaps, maybe, possibly urrrmm being one (even though to be honest I am not sure what one is). I had no news from the school so presumed someone better for the job had been chosen. Anyhoo... after the first meeting I discovered I was one (I really didn't know) and had pissed everyone off by not attending - bad start. I have stayed upto 2am two nights on the trot mindmapping projects to try and make up for it - but I feel the damage is done. The words 'Either you help or you don't but this is no good' were uttered - I wanted the earth to swallow me up. [crying down the phone to DH emotion]

For half term we are going to visit Blighty and DD is going to embark on a week of swimming classes I keep wondering if I am crazy to do this... but it worries me what with school and everything she isn't getting to the pool anymore and they are such good value and small classes in England I simply couldn't say no![swimminghathmm]

And P.S - Big big mahooosive hugs and kisses to Norfolklad - he sounds like an absoluely adorable boy. I think he simply got caught up in a confusion on a day his teacher probably had a headache, was feeling bleeeeuggh and not thinking straight!!!

Hoodlum-am very jealous of your child free weekend. It sounds fab...I have a child free day every weekend I just unfortunately have to spend it at work lol!

Nope not doing anything for pta here...the pta mums in DS's school look a bit scary to be honest although they sent a letter out asking for someone to be an elf for the chrimbo fair and DH thought it'd be a good job for me to do as I fit the requirements...Im 4ft 10! Needless to say I wasn't impressed!

Aww thank you for all your good wishes about DS. I know Im biast but he is an absolute star and to see him that upset was awful. Im leaving it with the teacher for now as Im sure she already thinks Im completely neurotic because I suggested that it might be an idea to try and encourage the little girl who has attached herself to DS to find some other friends to play with as well cause it was driving DS nuts but because he is such a softy he wouldn't say anything to her. Apparently because its all "free play" they can't chose friends for them which I totally realise but at the same time don't send them on errands to take the register etc together cause thats really not helping the situation!!

Swimming lessons sounds fab-DS has only very recently been enjoying swimming again and I think its a great skill to have.
Our half-terms seems a bit jam packed...so much for our relaxing week. DH is having a couple of days off so we are going to zoo etc,then am seeing my parents for a day,then on thursday we are going to see Lazytown at the theatre (not with the real sportacus unfortunately) and then also our old neighbours and her children. Im exhausted just thinking about it!

Oh tea how horrible! Poor you, I would be so upset. And cross. How very unfair. I would be very tempted to go for the 'Ok I won't help then' option there. I think you're very nice to go to all that trouble mindmapping etc after they were so rude. But I'm sure the damage isn't permanent... people will forget soon enough and just get on with things. Are you the only rep for your class, or do you have people to work with?

Oh god.... more tears at pickup. This is hideous. It is awful seeing her hurting like this. She was wretched. There isn't anything I can do to help her, which is really hard.