I'm too ill to take DD to school and now DH is unwell too -- can we just keep DD home for a day or two?

[SongsOfSongs]

I have COVID or the flu or something and I have been absolutely floored with fever, congestion, racing heart, etc. since Friday. I've camped out in the bedroom all weekend while DH took care of the children. Now, he says he's got it too. For me, it came on very strongly, so I worry that by the morning he is going to be very unwell. If he is, can we just keep DD home for the day? She's in Y5.

Ideas I've considered that won't work: We live a bit far from the school so no other families near us that I know of. No good enough friends that I would ask this of them either. It's tube + walking and I don't feel comfortable sending her on her own. I have an older DD but their schools are in opposite directions, so she couldn't make the primary drop and then get to her school in time and would get detention. Don't think I'd feel comfortable sending her in a taxi. Is there anything else I'm missing? Hopefully it'd just be a day - maybe two - before I was well enough to take her.

Never had one of us become ill before the other was better before!

This is sensible advice in my opinion.

Yeah, this. Surely she wouldn't be THAT late, and if you explained it to the school, they would surely go for it. Possibly pay for a taxi for them both and drop younger one off first, then older wouldn't be too late at all.

Absolutely. Ds had a virus 2 weeks ago that caused his to have an anoxic seizure and then a further collapse with a BP drop of 70 when the paramedics sat him up.

He’d gone to bed with a “slight headache”.

This is all a bit strange to me, if she's not in an exam year or has an event or something in school then why wouldn't you just keep her home for a few days until you both feel better? Much less stress than trying to get her into a taxi or running about.

On a tube ?

I’d like to know this too. Do they put your name in a book somewhere with a big X beside it?

You can’t see the difference? Really ???

I guess all you can do is call the school and explain the circumstances. But really OP, you need to use this as a kick up the backside to try and build up some sort of back up plan, there might be any number of circumstances where you and DH might find yourself in an emergency and be unable to drop / collect. You need to try and get something in place for emergency situations - be it a family member, school friend, even someone you could pay.

Mine is nearly 16 and can't get to school on her own

I live a 25 minute walk from DC school. I am a single parent. When i was absolutely floored with illness and could get help taking them to school on some days but no help in bringing them back. They stayed home, i didn't think twice about keeping them home. It was an easy decision for me.
I couldn't do what I couldn't do.

Exactly! Who is anyone to say what we are doing is ‘failing’

Failing at what? Nobody actually knows what we are supposed to be doing!!

I’d probably just take her in myself and then go back to bed afterwards.

It’s no biggy ring in sick

Addison Lee used to have a special service for unaccompanied children with additional safeguards and DBS checked drivers. Used to take children from airports to boarding schools, and by us when DD needed to go to country sports training and we could not take her.

Really? Cost a bloody fortune Are the parents made of money do you think?

Nobody has come up with a good suggestion on collecting the child either

Couple of the schools here wont even let year 5s walk to the sc hool gate to meet parents ( which is bloody ridiculous but hey) so getting a random driver to collevt her wont be easy

And what if the child becomes ill themselves during the school day. Then you are up shit street.

Best to keep them off

You say it’s for a couple of days and that may be the case but what if she then becomes ill herself which is fairly likely. You could be then talking a week plus so it’s not just about now. I agree with another poster that this really should be taken as an opportunity to see how you manage things like this. There could be any number of reasons why neither of you could take or pick up in an emergency situation.

Wow

If you are totally floored, is your DH also completely floored aswell?

I would speak to the school and see if they can advise on a taxi company they use for other students (we have kids in taxis comr yo our school). Thousands of kids take taxis to school every day by themselves so im sure your daughter can do it without issue.

For the future, I really would sort something with a friend. What if this happens again (you could easily both get flu next year) and its not fair on your daughter to be forced to stay home with ill parents. Can you make an agreement with a friend that you will drive further for absolute emergencies only?

A one off, and perhaps the school is not that far.

I forget the security measures, but included named drivers and ID etc. When I used them they took me through in some detail. Clearly enough to be trusted by boarding schools.

It was a suggestion. I accept that a taxi will be unaffordable for some. However I was putting it forward as an option that might be useful to other on occasions where parents cannot be two places at once.

In this situation I would take a cab and do the round trip with her. Then just dose up on paracetamol and just sit there without having to concentrate. I’d only not take her if both parents had a sickness bug and couldn’t be away from the bathroom.

It may be feasible with time to arrange Not a last minute thing ( i have a DGC who us a " taxi" child to school and it wasnt fast to sort out. )

But still there is risk of child becoming ill during school day,what then?

You do realise thousands of kids take taxis to school every year.

You dont keep kids off because parents are ill on the off chance they might get it - if its Covid, its every chance the child had it first with no symptoms and passed it on.

Year 5 is standard year for walking to school. Would be a good idea to practice for if this ever happens again.

First thing i’d be doing when well is making an agreement with a friend to help out in absolute emergencies only.

I hope that you just kept her at home OP. It really isn't a huge deal. I had to do the same a couple of times when DS was younger. Things happen, obviously if one of you can get her in that would be better, but you have clearly stated that you can't. Don't tie yourself in knots trying to get her in.

Depends on the journey, the area and the child surely.

Of course i do. I already stated that myDGC is a taxi child. Its not arranged with an hours notice.

And what do you do when schools wont even allow year 5s to meet parents at the school gate rather than classroom door? They might walk in but leaving is a different matter

The chances of the child becoming ill are much higher than usual wouldnt you say? So what DO you do in that situation if you get a call from the school?

Chances are one or both parents may feel better tomorrow or had a chance to sort alternative arrangements

I agree year5 is a good time to be taking yourself to and from school.