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Primary education

Join our Primary Education forum to discuss starting school and helping your child get the most out of it.

Is this fraud and what to do.

329 replies

froggola · 19/05/2025 12:01

Please no judgement. DH and I have been living apart for a couple of years but still together. Me and kids will move back into with him in September.
When applying for reception place I put his address as our main residence. I also didn’t say DS goes to nursery. As the nursery he goes to would prove that my house not in the borough is his main residence. I know that is wrong but I made the decision in a moment when filling in the form….Ds got offered a place and now school want a home visit. It’s feeling really stressful. What’s the plan? To go there and fake I already live there? Withdraw the application? It’s making me feel uneasy. I’d appreciate honest advice. I wasn’t intentionally deceitful, but I was. by omitting information and lying about my address. …which will be my address by September. If it makes any difference I’m on the deeds and have owned the house got a decade…

OP posts:
JLou08 · 19/05/2025 15:19

Just do the visit at dad's house. I personally don't think it's a big deal. If that's where you will be living in September then you should have a school place in that catchment area

TheNightingalesStarling · 19/05/2025 15:21

The irony is here that your rental address might not have been accepted as you own the address his dad lives at and you partly live there.

FiendsandFairies · 19/05/2025 15:22

I haven’t RTFT but there’s a lot of unhelpful judgyness on here. I think OP you do have a right to a place at that school as you own a house in the catchment area that you’ll be living in when your DC starts school there. I wouldn’t try and make out you live there already though. Good luck, and ignore the posters on here trying to make you feel super-bad - you are in an unusual situation.

YinYangalang · 19/05/2025 15:26

Stay quiet with LA. Just do the visit. Your DS has two addresses. Stop over-thinking.

I would be more worried if you are claiming benefits as a single parent.

SheilaFentiman · 19/05/2025 15:26

Some people who are slightly hard of thinking seem to be unable to tell the difference between people who WANT OP to get into trouble and have the childs school place removed (of which there don't seem to be any) and those of us warning that this could be a possibility so she should probably keep quiet.

Absolutely. I both think that OP has broken the rules and consider that the outcome - on this occasion - is a sensible one and so she shouldn't rock the boat by speaking up to the LA.

SheilaFentiman · 19/05/2025 15:26

YinYangalang · 19/05/2025 15:26

Stay quiet with LA. Just do the visit. Your DS has two addresses. Stop over-thinking.

I would be more worried if you are claiming benefits as a single parent.

Edited

OP has stated she doesn't claim benefits, so your mind can be at rest on that. Phew, eh?

SnugOrca · 19/05/2025 15:28

Just do the visit at his dad’s house. If that will be his main residence by September don’t worry about it. Don’t worry about it being fraud or reporting yourself, you’ve been going through some difficult stuff and he will be there in September.

People get their knickers in such a twist about school places and I say that as someone whose child didn’t get the place they wanted

Liondoesntsleepatnight · 19/05/2025 15:33

Has your DS still got a bedroom there? If so style it out. If not get one set up asap.

BobbyBiscuits · 19/05/2025 15:34

If you'd moved out of the house and weren't going back and kid was majority with you elsewhere then you do have an issue.
If you're moving there, then it will be true once he's at the school, so why not just move in there sooner before the visit.

Tiredofallthis101 · 19/05/2025 15:37

In my LA they say you can list the address you're moving to, I'd just get in touch and say you listed your new address as your current one but your move date is XX. Would they like to do a home visit at your current address or your new one where DC will be resident?

Waterweight · 19/05/2025 15:37

Seriously am I the only one not giving a shit ?
So you lied on school application forms to get your kids into a better/easier school - hardly the end of the world

Just attend the appointment be 100% normal about it "of course you knew you were going to live here hence having the address" "of course he attends nursery elsewhere you work or have family near by" (assuming they know you lied about it & this isn't a visit to check your child is ready for school as apparently he hasn't been out of the house educationally since birth)

At the end of the day your moving - he will start school - might as well start at the one he'll be at the longest...

BoleynMemories13 · 19/05/2025 15:39

I'm actually really surprised at some of the replies. It's not a case of Mumsnetters being militant. Nobody is judging, or wanting OP to get into trouble. The OP asked us if it is fraudulent. Some of us are just answering them honestly that, yes, it is. We're not doing it to be mean, we're simply answering the question honestly.

It's the rules that you have to supply the address of the child's main residence at the time of the application. If you don't, it's a fraudulent application. It's not unusual for people to own a property but live elsewhere. The 'elsewhere' is the address which should be supplied, as that's where they live as opposed to simply a property you own. In cases of split parents, they ask you to provide the address which is their main residence. In this case, at the time of the application it was the house OP and their children currently live in, not the Dad's home.

For those of you saying it's not a problem as he will live there soon, I'm sure you'd be the first to complain if your child missed out on a place at your first choice school because someone else filled out the form fraudulently. As I said to the OP, this is the crux of the matter. If it's not oversubscribed, what she did was wrong but she'll probably get away with it as no major harm done. If someone else has missed out on a place though because of the inaccurate information she supplied on the form, that is wrong.

Imagine if we all had the attitude of "it's ok, you're just planning ahead doing what is right for your child" when planning a move while applying for a school place? People who live closer at the time of applying could miss out on their rightful places. This can and does sadly happen. If it's found out, you risk losing the place because it is against the rules and therefore it is fraudulent.

Ilikeadrink14 · 19/05/2025 15:39

froggola · 19/05/2025 12:21

I don’t know if it’s over subscribed. So I should contact the school or the council and tell them?

Are you actually grown up? You seem very uninformed and seem to have no idea where to go for answers, other than on here.

HedgehogB · 19/05/2025 15:39

Have always wondered Why is it an issue for a child to go to school near their dad’s? He’s the parent too? Mothers are not legally ‘no 1 parent’ automatically. Obviously child should be local for a good part of the school week is my view. And yours will be all week by Sept which is the first anyone would notice anything anyway. So you are unlikely to get caught although yes, it was fraudulent, We did something like this, but openly, with an oversubscribed outstanding state C of E primary and I drove 45 mins a day each way. Dad was 6th of 7 generations to attend the school (old village school) and they were actually very supportive of not breaking the tradition. DS was 8th gen. Governors were written to. DS was at dad’s 1-2 nights in the week and alternate weekends. So not an impossible idea but…it’s better to tell the truth.

SheilaFentiman · 19/05/2025 15:44

Have always wondered Why is it an issue for a child to go to school near their dad’s? He’s the parent too?

Most LAs stipulate that the child should use the address they live at more of the time for school applications. If that is the dad’s address then that’s fine.

Moveoverdarlin · 19/05/2025 15:45

Can’t see the big deal. Do the home visit at your partners house. The school won’t be checking the drawers for your underwear, they won’t know if you live there or not. Presumably your partner has a sofa and a working kitchen and can offer the teacher a cup of tea. Get a bunch of flowers, stick a nice family photo on the mantle piece and voila!!

BoleynMemories13 · 19/05/2025 15:49

HedgehogB · 19/05/2025 15:39

Have always wondered Why is it an issue for a child to go to school near their dad’s? He’s the parent too? Mothers are not legally ‘no 1 parent’ automatically. Obviously child should be local for a good part of the school week is my view. And yours will be all week by Sept which is the first anyone would notice anything anyway. So you are unlikely to get caught although yes, it was fraudulent, We did something like this, but openly, with an oversubscribed outstanding state C of E primary and I drove 45 mins a day each way. Dad was 6th of 7 generations to attend the school (old village school) and they were actually very supportive of not breaking the tradition. DS was 8th gen. Governors were written to. DS was at dad’s 1-2 nights in the week and alternate weekends. So not an impossible idea but…it’s better to tell the truth.

Edited

It's nothing to do with favouring mothers. It has to be their main residence. For most children, that is their mother's house. I have known children where their father is theor primary care giver. In those cases, it's his address which is submitted.

Admissions is a complicated enough process, without allowing people to pick from multiple addresses which could completely change which school they are allocated. Someone should not be allowed a place at an oversubscribed, popular school which is on their dad's doorstep if they only see him every other weekend and they live the other side of town with their mum during the week. Yes dad is still their parent too, but in the case of school admissions it has to be main residence only.

Riaanna · 19/05/2025 15:50

froggola · 19/05/2025 12:16

I know. It’s making me feel unwell. I WILL be living there. It is my house. But I was not living in it , nor was DS. I did what i thought was best at the time but now with the home visit it’s all feeling insane.

It doesn’t matter where you will be living. The application is clear it is your address now. This is why they do home visits to uncover fraud. They will also speak to your child who will drop you in it.

And let’s be honest no one believes you’re moving back in September - make it make sense.

They will work it out and withdraw his offer of a place. And rightly so.

PineForestsSmellGood · 19/05/2025 15:51

Where I live parents do all kinds of deceitful things to secure a school place.
Along the lines you have.

I don't think you can undo the application. All you can do is to move in with your H for the date of the inspection.

I've never heard of a house visit- is this to check out addresses as being genuine?

prh47bridge · 19/05/2025 15:51

@froggola - I have not read the whole thread, only the first few posts.

It is impossible to say whether or not this is fraud on the information given. Many LAs say that you must use the address of any property that you own even if you don't live there. If the borough in question is one of those, you have not done anything wrong and you have nothing to worry about. You can have the home visit where you live and it won't make any difference.

If the borough does not insist on using the address of any property you own, that is a different situation.

So the first question is what your LA says. If you don't know, I will be happy to take a look for you if you PM me the name of the LA involved.

Riaanna · 19/05/2025 15:53

FuckityFux · 19/05/2025 14:41

How is it fraud when the child has two homes and other parent is already living there?
Honestly, some folk love to shit stir unnecessarily. 😂

Because you’re required to apply using the child’s normal residence. It’s very very clear on the application.

PicaK · 19/05/2025 15:57

What a nightmare of Admin paperwork you are about to give the school office and the admissions team. Extra work they don't need at this time of year.
You lied on the form and you got the place at the expense of someone else.

froggola · 19/05/2025 15:59

Ilikeadrink14 · 19/05/2025 15:39

Are you actually grown up? You seem very uninformed and seem to have no idea where to go for answers, other than on here.

Ouch. Seriously? I made a post seeking genuine guidance from other women regarding school places and my own shitstorm living situation and how I’ve gone about applying. I’ve been benefit bashed and now i’m a child. I’ve had a variety of answers. For those that answered constructively i’m grateful. I’m not looking for a pat on the back or a lynching either.

OP posts:
KIlliePieMyOhMy · 19/05/2025 15:59

Ask for the last appointment of the day. Offer the teachers wine in the garden. Say how the child lives in two places and what is happening in September.
Don't panic. If the school have a summer fayre pop into that so your child can see the school.

I used to work in school admissions this is a very minor issue compared with most.

feelingrobbed · 19/05/2025 16:03

It’s your house. It’s fine it’s not like it’s your aunts house. Chill. Decline home visit if you want.