Being told that taking child out of school whilst I'm in hospital will be unauthorised absence

[hdbs17]

Has anyone been told before by their DC infant school that any absence for a medical need that is not that of the child's would be unauthorised absence?

I have requested authorised absence for DC whilst I go in for my elective caesarean and they have told me that this wouldn't be granted and would be unauthorised. We have no family or anyone close by to be able to drop and collect DC and they will be going to my parents over an hour away whilst I'm in hospital (and obviously DH will be with me). I don't know what else they expect me to do!

I am aware that they have this year granted authorised absences for children to be taken away on holiday - but they are refusing to grant one day for a medical reason!

I have emailed them to request again and plead but if they still say no - how can I take this further? The school board?

They're causing me a lot of stress which I don't need right now.

It's just an admin thing for the school. Our school office are lovely and would have just said 'please call them in sick on the day so we don't have to record it as unauthorised, congrats and good luck'.

Apply again. If they deny it then on the day get the grandparents to phone school and say he's had diarrhea so will return 48 hours after the last episode.
They'll likely know its a lie but also covers you from getting a fine.

I’d still phone in sick on the day and let them try and prove you’re fibbing.

can’t dh drop them/pick them up. unless you’re gestational diabetes etc you’re unlikely to be one of the first to go in

Taxi or bus? There are other ways to travel.

There's no fine. This whole thread is beyond nonsense!

Theres no need for buses or taxis or anyone missing a birth or any changes or any new requests or anything else. The only thing needed is to accept that a mark is made on a register...who the feck actually cares?

God, the British system has you all gone mad!

Another not really understanding why your DC would need to miss school. Your DH won't need to be at the hospital 24/7 so couldn't he take DC to school and pick them up, then your parents could either have DC at their house or yours, DH can also use that opportunity to pick up any bits you need while you're in hospital and get himself cleaned up. Hospitals often don't have showering facilities for partners just for patients, especially on a ward, the facilities are for the women to use,

Schools used to just reply, "thanks for letting us know," which was much simpler.

Never ceases to amaze me how scared and brainwashed we've all become about SATS results, unauthorised absences and the effect of short term exclusions.
As a parent of a young adult I can assure you that my child - who had term time holidays at Primary School and a number of Fixed term exclusions at Secondary school has not had his adult life impacted in any way by having these on his school record. He had Uni offers, passed a BA (Hons) with a 1st and went on to pass a Masters and is gainfully employed.

Schools will rarely authorise absences because the rules don't allow them to. Doesn't mean you can't keep your child off school for a legitimate reason and as long as they don't have a generally poor attendance record or there are known safeguarding issues, I doubt that the school are really that bothered - except for the fact it impacts on THEIR statistics!

Why can't your husband pick up the parents and do the school runs? Sounds like it's your 3rd+ child, it's normal for dps to have to do this for subsequent kids. It's not even a given they can attend the birth.

We did once get absence authorised for my daughter for a medical need which was not her own… but it was a pretty extreme scenario, we had to go to Germany for 6 weeks for my other daughter to have radiotherapy for her cancer and didn’t want to split the family. So it’s possible! But I honestly wouldn’t worry about it, they’ll be working to their own guidelines, just do what’s best for your family and don’t let it stress you.

This thread just proves the madness ..there are people worried concerned about one day off scum when those with really pooor attendance still don’t care won’t be incentivised by prizes as they have no chance of 100% attendance. It’s absolute madness

I agree with this.

I don't think we've all become like that at all, in real life most people don't overthink or worry about it. I wonder if online forums/social media give people a place to air their worries without judgement so it seems that everyone is worried when really it's just that others aren't feeling the need to post about it?

Telling them in advance doesn’t make any difference as to whether it’s authorised or not?

Also can’t see why DH can’t do pickups and drop offs. He won’t be able to be in hospital the whole time anyway

Agreed... utter madness for a father who wants to be there to risk missing the birth of his baby... to get a child to school 🙄. Yes, some dads are doing childcare and can't be there, but it's a question of priorities. Ensuring your older children are being cared for while your wife gives birth if there is no one else around to do it = high priority. Getting a primary age child with good attendance to school when there is perfectly adequate childcare available in the form of grandparents = fairly low priority, compared to being present for the birth of their sibling.

If the OP feels guilty about her DC missing school, she can order a couple of Biff and Chips and a craft kit to inflict on the grandparents.

The register is a legal document and there's rules about which codes can be used to record absences and attendance.

Just because it's recorded as an unauthorised absence doesn't mean you can't take the day off.

You're better off having it correctly recorded than lying and saying they're unwell. Children will come back talking about seeing their grandparents and a new sibling and it will be obvious to everyone they weren't ill.

Attendance only becomes an issue if a child has persistent poor attendance. In the unlikely event your child did hit the threshold for poor attendance, it's better for the head to say to the LA "this child has low attendance, but X days were due to parents having a c section books so the children were with grandparents" rather than "this child has low attendance and seems to have random days all over for illnesses, but we know on at least one occasion parents have lied".

I agree. DD went to nursery as planned when I went in to have my section- nursery wasn’t open yet at the time we had to depart for the hospital, so we had to leave her with a nursery friend who lived nearby. The mum left both her DD and ours into childcare at the normal time. DD was then collected by her grandparents and taken back to our house, before DH relieved my parents at about 9pm.

You’ll probably be in for the equivalent of two school days and it’s a lot easier for the babysitting GPs if the day is broken up with school, especially if they have no car. An excited primary school age kid stuck in the house, out of routine, missing mum and dad? Honestly I’d be trying to get them to school, even if it means asking a few favours or providing grandparents with taxi money for the pickup. If you can’t, then just shrug your shoulders at the unauthorised absence. It ultimately means nothing.

There are fines nowadays. It varies between councils but our council issues one for more than 3 days which would be reasonably likely for a c section stay.

Doesn't matter whether it's authorised or not, it's still an absence. You can just let the school know she won't be in on that day for X reason, they will say they can't authorise it, you say okay that's fine. Makes no difference to her attendance percentage.

The authorisation for your earlier D&C may have been on compassionate grounds taking into account as well that it's not a procedure that is planned months in advance.

The school will know you're lying and will put it down as unauthorised. Which changes nothing.

So take this absence as the unauthorised one, where the school had given you the benefit of the doubt and you admit he could have logistically gone in.

Just look.at it as its evened itself out

One authorised when he could have gone in.
One unauthorised when he cant.

No big deal really

It not being authorised is no big deal. Accept that it is unauthorised and do what you have to do. They aren't allowed to authorise this. Being unauthorised doesn't mean you'll definitely get fined, and if you are fined then just pay up. You can't do anything different.

Just ignore it. It makes no difference to you if it's unauthorised, only to the school. What do you fear ? That you'll be arrested, taken to court, fined ? That's all nonsense for one day off while you are in hospital. Just tell the school it makes no difference to you whether it's authorised or not.

You actually have a confirmed c section date and enough time to organise child's attendance if you're not happy with unauthorised absence. Imagine the thousands of other mothers who go into labour naturally just before the school run in the early hours, I wonder what they do.