How to change school policy

[Pookielumchum]

There's a school policy i believe needs changing. I reached out to other parents on a private parent Facebook group, and it turned out several parents agreed with me. I went to the headteacher and said, I and these other parents want change. Can we address the policy." She said that no one had minded before. So it wasn't a problem before I brought it up. And it wouldn't be appropriate for me to bring the other parents in with me. And she wouldn't accept a poll showing all the parents who want a change. How is one supposed to fix things, if not by working together as a group of parents?

'family bathroom'?

Out and about there aren't generally 'family bathrooms'.
There are mens, womens and disabled.

Out of interest, what would you want to happen if your child falls and scrapes their knee or elbow or has a rash on their shoulder? Or falls and rips their tights?

This wouldn’t bother me at all and I can’t imagine it bothers enough parents for the school to change any policies. What would you do if the reception teacher or TAs weee male?

Having worked in this setting , you have like 5 mins for a class of 28 kids to get changed and I can assure you no child is standing about staring at any other child .
I’ve also never seen a child at this age uncomfortable because they are just thinking about what their doing in pe . And after Pe someone looking for a jumper , or a pump in middle of floor with no name .
It also wouldn’t be practical as we were lucky to have teacher and TA , some days it would maybe just be a teacher . Certainly wouldn’t have the staff to supervise 2 changing areas , wouldn’t even have the space sadly.
By the time you take breaks and dinner out of the school day you would be surprised at the time you have left and everything you have to fit in that time .

I’m sorry but you are being ridiculous and precious.

Assuming that the majority of teachers are female, do you want the 4 year old boys to get changed alone with no help? because obviously they can’t mix with the females!

Just a couple of things:

When you say that other kids have extra clothes on when it is PE days - do you know for sure this is for "modesty"? I'd assume it was for ease of changing - quicker to get ready if you're already wearing tshirt and shorts under school uniform.

Does your DD never share bathtime with her siblings? Or are all your DC female? If she has male siblings, does she see them undressed? Do they see her undressed?

Are you expecting that the girls in the class also only be supervised by female staff? Is this achievable?

I don't think at reception there is a need to separate by sex - underwear is worn (or shorts as you've previously mentioned) so children aren't "exposing" themselves.

The head isn't wrong about spotting bruises etc when children are changing - as a student teacher I helped a little boy take his tshirt off and discovered burns all over him where cigarettes had been ground out on his skin. That was horrific

I'm very GC and very much in favour of single sex spaces (as opposed to splitting by gender or having mixed sex) but at this age I really think you're being ridiculous. This is not an issue I'd raise because I don't actually think it's an issue full stop.

You are being ridiculous, what exactly do you think will happen between 4 and 5 year olds? What are you going to do about swimming? Our son swims at school every week and his uniform swim shorts are no bigger than his boxers! None of them care they are all completely oblivious to it, it isn’t like they are taking their underwear off. Parents dressing girls in extra clothes is just teaching their children their is an issue with boys, as a boy Mum this makes me so sad.

You do know at this age they are too busy looking for lost pumps and trying to put things on inside out to notice other children's bodies

We did pe in our underwear I think until year 2 did notice last year that the reception girls in ds school had cycling shorts on in bright pink longer then there dresses.

My ds got changed in class at that age and I think our biggest concern was for the poor teacher trying to get them all changed in time.

I think your being ridiculous but if enough parents have concerns the teacher should at least listen and try to explain.

Yeah the parents agreeing with you were only doing so in order to get out of the conversation. I highly doubt they actually care.

Bonkers.

You're being ridiculous. Like other posters, I'm absolutely for single sex spaces and protecting girls from the male gaze but these children are in reception. They aren't looking at each other's bodies. They are learning how to dress and undress, which many may not yet be adept at.

It's not practical or necessary to segregate. It's like you're sexualising 4 year olds. I'm all for educating about boundaries and dignity but this is not worth the attention you're giving it. Let children be comfortable and innocent at 4, not told anyone of the opposite sex is staring at their bodies while they change.

My bet too.

Most places don't have a family bathroom, so what happens when you're out? Or are you using disabled facitilites?

Parents putting on extra modesty clothes are not helping.

I sometimes put extra shorts on under my daughter's school dresses and skirts but only for warmth and comfort, rather than being a 'modesty' thing

I don’t agree with you (I think it sexualises children to separate them very young) but best way to change a policy is to ask the parent governor to ask for it to be placed on the next governors meeting agenda by contacting the clerk to the governors. They would need to vote on reviewing the policy, so even if all parents agreed with you if the governors don’t then that’s the end of it.

I don’t think that it’s really down to the school to cater to every personal belief of parents.

It’s reasonable for you to ask, but also for them to say no.

Most places have handicap bathrooms. I literally can't use the bathroom without one. Where would i leave the other 2 kids?

Disabled often doubles as family. I literally can't use the bathroom without it.

Is your reception child your eldest? I used to get mine to stand outside the cubicle with their feet under the door, singing (the child, not the feet).

Have you read all school policies to be clear about what section of the relevant policy it is you want to have reviewed? Statutory ones at least should be on the school website. It's very unlikely there will be a discrete 'PE changing' document.

"handicap bathrooms"

There is a whole other debate here about bathroom use. Suffice to say, as your children get older, or if you ever take ds out alone, you will use the female toilets. Same with changing for something like swimming.

You literally can and should, having kids is not a disbility.

'handicp bathrooms' is a whole other thread of ignorant, offensive fuckwitty so I'm not even going there.

But one thing is clear, you think the world revolves around your child. But it doesn't.

Fuck me, “handicap”?

Your child’s going to have more issues than the ones you’re causing already.