Not well off and worried about bullying at private school

[Pansyt77]

Our 6 year old is at our local prep, we picked it because the classroom environment was second to none. In the grand scheme of things we have a good household income - but not multiple 6 figures, I'm a SAHM and we live in a flat. A few people (not in the private school system mind you) have said our child is likely to be bullied as we are clearly less well off than the other families. Have I made a horrible mistake? Is bullying common for less well off students? We had the choice between a bigger house and the school and we picked the school but am now worried we are in a bit of a 'sweet' period and the financial difference will become really clear.

I have not seen any bullying over this, but I agree with PP that bullies will always find something. I don't think she is more exposed to it than she would be at state school.

Around that age I did field some fairly blunt comments from visiting children - why is your house so small etc. It's not bullying though, I think it's nearly always just a social gaff made by a small child and they will learn. Easy to over-react to those comments though. If you are worried, make your house memorable in another way. Make it the house with the bright pink bedroom, the cool den in the corner, magnum ice creams for pudding, or messy crafts allowed and encouraged. This is what kids remember.

Going against the grain here, I went to a private school but it was in a very wealthy area which is maybe why it was different. Kids definitely cared (because of their parents views I expect) who had what, and was doing what with it.
Exactly why I wouldn't send my children to public school, my family were comfortably off but was often treated as the poor relation, when realistically we definitely weren't.

I think younger children really don't care about that sort of thing. We are reasonably well off although state educate and DC have been friends with whoever they like. One child did report back that our house has hundreds of toys (it doesn't but DC are luckier than many).

I don't remember at my private primary caring about this either.

However by private secondary it was evident who had money, not in a bragging ways but holidays, cars (at 17) and general experiences. I don't remember any bullying because of it. It was about looks and personality. Those who could attract a boyfriend had cache (no money needed!)

It is very evident at our local secondary modern and grammar who has money! New cars for DC are quite normal. This isn’t just happening at private schools. The pretty well off are in state schools too and it’s very noticeable who had what and the parents even have Porches and Aston Martins. And big houses and gardens. The idea that better off people only go private is ridiculous. The local NHS surgeons have lots of ££££ for cars and wow houses!

I was worried about this too, but I’ve not found it to be an issue at all. There was far more ‘keeping up with the Joneses’ at the state school they were at.
Nobody seems to give a shit at their private school who’s got more money than others, and it’s been a far more inclusive and friendly environment than I feared.

If I was paying for my child to go to a "better school" for a "decent education" then I would expect them to have a positive experience and any issues dealt with fast. Why should she be bullied? People get bullied for anything to be fair now. It used to be the scruffy kid. The smelly kid. The one with glasses (not right but sadly it was usually based on appearance) now the pretty blonde girl gets bullied. So your DD might be just fine. If not take her out and move her to a normal free school. Id rather grow up with poorer people than stuck up bullies.