3+ 4+ 5+ 7+ support thread 2018

[mumteacher]

In previous years I have started these threads to help and support all those involved in the independent school admissions process.

I wasn't going to start one this year as I know I would not be able to check back on it as regularly as I would like, which then defeats the purpose of the thread.

However, after numerous positive PM's about the threads I think it would be a shame not to start one where at least the hand holding can continue.

There are many many people who have been through the process and 'live to tell the tale' . There are also other tutors I know who read this thread and it would be great if you all could help and support and share your ideas👏🏼

(Roll on 2018!) 😉

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/primary/2783435-3-4-5-7-support-thread-2017

Thanks fitnessfanatic, that explains why we still haven't got a letter yet despite a phone call from the head offering a place. So pleased and relieved!

Congrats rumpleteezer x x

@rumpleteezer do you happen to know if non siblings got phone call offers

My daughter is a non sibling (this is for the 4+). I still haven't got the letter yet though.

Hi 4+! In response, that's where parents come into it. You know your DDs best. If you don't think a school is right for your DD, don't send them. Schools offer a place. It's not an order.
Please understand that the schools have been doing these admissions for decades. They do not want to take DCs who will flounder miserably and they really don't like sitting parents down and telling them that their DC is struggling. Very academic schools teach at a very brisk pace and want DCs who will actually ENJOY it.
Do they miss DCs who are brilliant but have an off day? Yes. Do some DCs who are missed go on to be brilliant later? Yes.

That's true horsemadmom, it's down to the parents ultimately. But we're only human :) Would I be tempted if Habs rejects us while NLCS offers? Of course I would, even though I think DD is not NLCS material. There is always that thought in the back of the head - perhaps I might try? may be it will work?..
There is risk in it. A serious one, as it can deteriorate rather quickly - I know of a 5yo who was withdrawn from the school by her parents because of self harm symptoms (mild, but still). It took less than a year.
I believe some children do enjoy this type of fast paced environment, but it's certainly not for everyone, however bright DC might be. And it's very difficult to tell at 4, they are too immature emotionally.

4plus, you are a wise parent. I would say that there isn't much difference in pace between Habs and NLCS. To a certain extent, if they offer a place, it's because the school thinks your DD will do well. They select from an awful lot of girls and can be chosey. As I said, if your mummy radar says 'this isn't the right school', you can decline. These decisions are not written in stone and if at 7 or 11 or 16 you feel differently, you can try again. I promise that they never hold a decline against you. In fact, they dispose of the past applications so as not to prejudice future admissions rounds unless a waitlist candidate asks to be kept on file.

Re-read. How sad for that 5 year old. I have a DC who developed anxiety (not at NLCS, I hasten to add) and it's rotten. It is also rarely just about the school. But that's a whole other thread.

That's interesting information horsemadmom, thank you! I was wondering exactly about this - how would it look like at 7+ or 11+ if we turn down some offers now but decide to re-apply later.

This discussion brought to mind another thing I was always interested to know if you can share your thought? I'm a foreigner and in my country at some point in history the whole education system was 'redesigned' with the only purpose in view - to produce workforce for rapid industrial development. It was a long time ago but still lingers on. Thinking of British top schools from that background, I cannot quite understand what's the 'purpose of existence' of such schools as NLCS? I can understand Eton and the likes for example, to me it's a tradition of producing military and government elites, makes perfect sense. But what do NLCS, Habs, City do actually, in the context of society, economics etc? Surely being on the top of the league tables cannot be the ultimate purpose, it just doesn't make sense as it's a technicality, not the essence.

I would be really interested to hear any thoughts on this.

The purpose of NLCS was to provide an academic education of the same standard that boys received. Frances Mary Buss was determined in 1850 to teach girls more than needlework and good manners. The first qualified female dentist came out of NLCS- for example. The head engineer of the Shard is a more recent example. The purpose is to take bright girls, teach them with enthusiasm, let them know they have no limits to what they can achieve and send them out into the world.
We looked at a range of schools at 11 for DD2 including co-ed and observed lessons where boys dominated the discussions and an A Level physics lesson with only one girl. Parents don't think about these things at 4+ with tiny children but I was won over to single sex education . The purpose of schools like NLCS, Habs, SPGS etc. is to produce young women who will not accept limitations on their ambitions.

Thank you horsemadmom, that's something to think about. I'm not quite sure at the moment if it's really good for a girl to be very ambitious... men usually don't want constant competition at home (but I'm sure it's just my personal perspective, I'm speaking as a divorced high achiever :) )

On another topic - sorry for bombarding you with endless questions, I do appreciate your answers - we now have offers from NHEHS, Wimbledon and St Alban's and if we don't get anything from Habs or NLCS we'll need to decide between those three.

I've heard NHEHS now has a headmaster who was formerly NLCS head of classics. Do you think the school may change a lot in the next few years? What might be the direction of change?

@4plus - sounds like you have a great choice of schools!!

Did you receive St Albans High School for girls today? Im not at home but know they were possibly sending out today!

Yes, we've just received it. I expected it tomorrow but they are quick :)

Mr Shouts is (cannot overstate this) amazing! NHEHS is very lucky to have him. He's inspiring, kind and very funny. He'll push standards up at the school and keep a very keen eye on the methodology behind changes. The last lecture I went to with him was about the difference in boys and girls assessment of their abilities when applying for first jobs out of uni and how NLCS planned to tackle it from the start. I'm sure he'll be applying this approach at NHEHS too.
I disagree with you about ambition and hope you aren't passing this on to your DD (unless I misunderstood, in which case, apologies). Boys just better get on the feminist bus!

Thank you horsemadmom!

one of the things I like about Habs is almost no homework in the juniors and a huge focus on resilience and wellbeing. They have a head of wellbeing who took a sabbatical to go and look at what other schools, and organisations like businesses were doing and is now back to implement it at the school. My daughter has had some issues that I suspect at more pushy schools might have led to her being edged out - Habs have been amazing and she's now doing really well. They somehow manage to have a really laid back attitude in the juniors and yet continue to be academically strong by GCSE/A-level time.

@4plus - thanks - phoned MIL from work who happens to be at home - and we’ve received letter too

Congrats pk4317! :)

Are the Habs 4+ results on Monday or Tuesday (the letter says they would post the letters out on Monday)?

@aditi83 I tried to call the school today to ask as I had the same question. No answer. Post will arrive on tues 30th. I think unlikely they will tell parents on the Monday as I think the schools have an agreement to only announce from tues 30 Jan. I feel your pain. Roll on Tuesday ....🙃

Thank you fitnessfanatic108! Was thinking of it too! 🤞

Hi all, any thoughts between orley farm, alpha prep and Chigwell?. Still awaiting st Helens but confused between through-schools and prep ones.
Another DD waiting in the wings (6 mth old now). Most likely will give 7plus for another shot at nlcs and habs and city of london girls. Older daughter is bright and social and we think we would like an academic school @11plus

Rexcub - where is Chigwell school ?. I have friends at Alpa - it's very academic & geared to passing 11+. Orley - good longstanding reputation and facilities - but they prep more for 13 than 11+

Ma518, Chigwell is in East London - Essex border. It's local to us but we would move to NW london if we choose a school over there. Thanks for the additional info on orley as well.

Ladies, before everyone starts choosing between Habs and NLCS frantically, do you mind helping me solve my trilemma? :)

It's here www.mumsnet.com/Talk/education/3152135-STAHS-vs-JAGS-vs-Wimbledon-High

TIA!