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Original poster

Shocked at DS's teacher this week!

217 replies

WellThisIsShit · 06/10/2017 23:04

She made a mess of something last week, which I did mention (politely!) in an email in which I was covering a couple of other unrelated things.

I then found out that lots of parents were 'up in arms' about the problem and there'd been multiple complaints, from individual parents and group complaints. Plus an angry exchange on Monday morning in the play ground, when a parent went in full throttle, and the teacher reacted in kind. All of which was inflamed by the teacher making it clear she hadn't got a clue what the issue was, or even what the parent was talking about at all.

Anyway, big furore and much concern that the teacher isn't up to the job (I'm glad I wasn't at the school gates this week!).

The wider context is that this teacher is coming into a challenging situation and is under the microscope, as she was parachuted in two days before the start of term after another teacher left the school in a fix when they pulled out with no notice. So, ht did a lot of classroom/ teacher shuffling and DS year ended up with this completely new teacher, who is very newly qualified, and has never taught in the uk before (or lived here actually). The school is really demanding and I have often mused that the poor teachers must have to be excellent, every single day, just to keep up - utterly exhausting to think about! Also the parents are err, well, they are much more involved than alot of schools, I think, and they expect to be listened to more as well.

So, anyway, it was all a bit heated and some of the parents were gearing up to a vote of no confidence in this teacher.

All made worse by the teacher responding ineptly showing her inexperience at handling parents... being confrontational, refusing to back down on things that she really shouldn't have chosen to make a stand about, being patently untrue and embarrassing to watch unfold (like the time when she decided to be firm and immovable that there was no one of x name in her class when grandparents did the pick up, and of course everyone watching was aware that x was been in that class for the last 3yrs and was in fact clearly there! Utter cringe my awful moment!), etc etc.

So basically, situation going nuclear fast argh!

So, I was completely shocked to get a sensible, well thought out response to my email, explaining her rationale at some points, and openly taking on my thoughts at others. Admitted she'd got the particular thing X wrong, and why, and how she was moving on from it... and according to other parents who are more tapped into this stuff than me, the teacher has responded in that same way to all the other complaints too, written and also verbal, meeting parents etc.

Basically, I'm really impressed.

Takes a big person to come back from this. And tbh, I wasn't expecting it!

So really, I wanted to share it on here and do a little private cheer for her :)

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viques · 07/10/2017 08:30

You say she is newly qualified and comes from another country. The chances are she trained in a country where teachers are given respect and are treated as professionals both by their employers and their students and students parents.

To be dropped into the war zone that is the British Education system with its crazy curriculum and sharp toothed parents must be like waking up to find a zombie apocalypse has occurred overnight and that all the rules and niceties you thought applied to a civilised society have been swept aside. I advise her to arm herself with a well honed samurai and remember to double tap.

viques · 07/10/2017 08:31

That's a samurai sword, not an actual samurai warrior, though on the other hand, if she knows one ..............

Lindy2 · 07/10/2017 08:32

You should all be ashamed of yourselves.
Butt out and let that poor teacher get on with her job of actually teaching your children.

LadyintheRadiator · 07/10/2017 08:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MaisyPops · 07/10/2017 08:36

I'm amazed how many people seem to think:

  1. They know when a teacher is an NQT
  2. That NQT means not a good teacher

What they actually are saying 'this member of staff looks young' and 'because I think they are a new teacher they naturally won't be very good'.

I had a student last year who told me after parents evening that their parent said 'you're lucky to have a young and enthusiastic new teacher' Apparently the student laughed at their parent and by way of correction said 'she's like 30!'Grin
I couldn't be doing with parents who judge my capacity as a teacher based on how old they think I am.

JustMumNowNotMe · 07/10/2017 08:39

Jesus christ, that poor bloody teacher!

I genuinely wouldn't teach even if offered a sodding million a year, when this kind of bullshit is what you have to put up with.

I work with prisoners ffs and I honestly prefer spending my days with them and the challenges they bring than primary school parents of PFBs 😂😂

SemiNormal · 07/10/2017 08:40

That shit wouldn't wash in the school my son goes to. I know of several parents who have been banned from the school grounds for kicking off being confrontational, and rightly so. Were any children in earshot whilst parents were rounding on the teacher?

Unless this issue was concerning the safety of my child I'm not sure I would bother to complain about a new teacher who was just settling in, not only to her new role as a teacher but to a new country too!
Although (if you're also the other poster but with a new name?) eye rolling does grind my gears in a particular way, so yes, that would give me the rage but I'd not mention it.

If I were you, or any of the other parents, I would be going in on Monday to apologise for any upset feeling I'd caused.

Herechickychicky · 07/10/2017 08:42

How dare you all.

Have you a job? Have you ever had one? Imagine if 30 people turned up at your job when you were newly qualified, three weeks in and you'd made a mistake. Imagine them shouting at you, going to your boss about you and sending you emails telling you what to do. Bullying, that's what it is. And don't even get me STARTED on how you casually "drop in" that she's from another country. You are NOT on her side. You are superior and sneery and patronising.

She will leave. I hope for her sake she does, and goes somewhere where her face fits better and she's not surrounded by such a load of entitled twats. And you'll all be stuck with a succession of supply teachers and your kids will be the poorer for it.

Cupcakey · 07/10/2017 08:42

The parents sound like a classroom of unruly children ! Confused

2014newme · 07/10/2017 08:47

Yes our HT happily calls parents and challenges them on their behaviour. She nips it in the bud. 'what are you so grumpy about' is one of her favourite openers. She would not take this shit.

Tugtupite · 07/10/2017 08:50

I hope I am mistaken but did I sense a little racism there too?

I sensed that too...deeply ignorant and unpleasant.

MaisyPops · 07/10/2017 08:53

I picked up on the racism too.

Just dropped in there... a bit like the vote of no confidence and the fact she is new.
But obviously, the OP is on the teacher's side. Hmm

SardinesAreSwimming · 07/10/2017 08:53

Give her a public cheer OP. Not a private one.

In total agreement with the bullying, impossible parents comments.

Id love to know what you all do for a job?

2014newme · 07/10/2017 08:55

Yes racist.

MyWhatICallNameChange · 07/10/2017 09:17

My DS's school had a lot of trouble retaining a teacher for his class, but not other classes. I'm now wondering if there was a parent thing going on there that I wasn't aware about. (Not me, I used to drop off/pick up and run, mainly so I didn't have to talk to other parents!)

How horrible for the teacher to have to put up with a load of braying parents. No wonder the other teacher left before they started, maybe they'd heard about the parents!

I'm sure the teacher is so pleased that you are so patronisingly on her side now.

bakingcupcakes · 07/10/2017 09:20

I don't know how teachers do it.

Lowdoorinthewal1 · 07/10/2017 09:24

My guess is that the school is in a deprived area, there is a high staff turnover due to the school being unable to hit unrealistic targets

No no MrsP my bet is a very naice, high performing school in an affluent area. Probably outstanding. Those are the hardest schools to work in IMO because of the pressure to get top results and all this ^ shit.

What the parents will get themselves is a string of new teachers who are in and out in a couple of terms because nobody can hack the atmosphere they create.

Anasnake · 07/10/2017 09:26

That teacher WILL leave and you can all pat yourselves on the back for your vote of no confidence. How clever of you all for bullying out the foreigner. Then supply after supply after supply will come and go.
Grow up you utter bunch of fuckwits.

user789653241 · 07/10/2017 09:36

I think OP was graceful and brave enough to come back after all those harsh comment.
I'm sure she got the message, and what most of people think about what happened at her school.
No need to be so harsh anymore, do we?

Original poster
WellThisIsShit · 07/10/2017 09:38

And yes, personally I find the err, parents influence pretty scary, and I'm not the one facing it everyday Blush. I've been through tense boardroom conversations and yet nothing comparing to the situations facing teachers at school .

I honestly thought it would be obvious that I'm saying 'bloody hell this was a nightmare' rather than 'yay I'm agreeing with the crazy parents who apparently shouted in the playground'. Didn't occur to me I'd be ripped to shreds just for describing the situation and saying a massive well done for her handling the situation instead of it exploding as it seemed set to!

I guess I was not writing it clear enough, as I started with that assumption, not realising anyone on here would think I'd be doing anything but looking on in horror.

I'd already decided that I'd be getting the ht involved if this carries on... not to make it worse but to ensure the school know what's happening so they can support the teacher. But don't want to make it worse for the teacher if she can quell the angry mob herself... which seems to be what is happening.

She's inexperienced and thrown into a crazy situation. No she didn't come over especially for this job, she was over here and by 'luck' got snapped up straight away 1-2 days before the start of the school year! I didn't think she's particularly right for the job simply because she's so new to it all, and the expectations are unrealistically high, given the specific situation.

So, amazing whirlwind for her, or feeding to the wolves depending on how you look at it!

And no, the school has a good retention rate, and a good reputation, and a very strong ht. But I think it suffers from being 'the best' (allegedly!) in an area where schools are oversubscribed, and people are scrambling to get their child in... and parents have historically had a huge sway over decisions there. Partly because they've raised literally millions for the school, so a force for good if pointed in the right direction, but like a stampede if not.

I will say again, I am shocked by the teacher turning this week around, and the way she responded to it once it had got so awful. I wouldn't expect anyone to be able to 'talk down' the outrage, and yet... she did. Without cow towing, or going postal.

That is impressive and maybe I don't need to feel so worried about her! Core of steel that young teacher :)

OP posts:
Original poster
WellThisIsShit · 07/10/2017 09:42

And no, no racism from me at all. Incredible.

Was ok with people misunderstanding, fair enough, but people just deciding to make stuff up to justify their own vitriol... well, I think that says it all doesn't it?

Nb I'm not British myself you idiots, but don't let that stop you from making me into your Saturday morning whipping boy.

OP posts:
MaisyPops · 07/10/2017 09:43

Good on you for coming back OP.
I did feel from your posts you were on the fringes a bit.

I don't think it's your place to comment on her suitability for the job. The fact you do suggests that the parent culture in your school is awful.

I would be contacting the head immediately.
Sometimes overly invested pushy middle class parents can be worse to deal with than those from poorer backgrounds who are tearing their hair out trying to get their child to see the value of school.

The head needs to sort this mean girls culture out straight away.

Scabbersley · 07/10/2017 09:46

Just leave her to sort it out herself. It all sounds awful. My dds independent prep was like this - awful parents constantly up in arms about things. It was a blessed relief to leave. I can't believe that the teachers put up with it

user789653241 · 07/10/2017 09:48

I started to feel bit sorry for Op, not anymore, after this.

"Nb I'm not British myself you idiots, "

Horrible. And I am not British either.

AccrualIntentions · 07/10/2017 09:50

The parents were going to hold a vote of no confidence in the teacher? Who the hell do they think they are, the 1922 committee? Shock