Teacher row

[Wedny1]

My 9 year old teacher called my son a disgrace for talking in line am I being over the top but isn't that a bit harsh I've told him I'm not happy and am going to take the matter further

Disgrace definition....

loss of reputation or respect as the result of a dishonourable action.

bring shame or discredit to

Seems a valid use of the word to me,,,

Teacher wannabes ??? Well they're a rare breed.

Lots of teachers and loads of ex teachers I'm sure. People who got sick of feeling helpless to discipline behaviour of children who's parents won't allow it.

A disgrace - yes maybe the teacher could have chosen a different word. Maybe detention. I'm sure you'd have had something to say about that too.

Secondary school will be harder.

Disgrace - Loss of reputation or respect as the result of a dishonourable action.(OED). Seems like an appropriate word.

Bluntness, I thought you said you agree with Bertie on your first post...
I am a bit confused, am I missing something?

I thought Bertie was saying the op was being a snowflake and those agreing with her were snowflakes,,,hence my agreement,,im still a bit confused to be honest as to who is now the snowflake..😂😂😂

No teacher would call a child a disgrace over a one-off talking in the line incident. Have you asked your child how many other times they had been spoken to about inappropriate talking?

Bluntness, tbh, I was a bit surprised to see your first post, since I have seen your sage comments in the past. Now it makes sense. Thanks!

I think this is one of those cases where we as parents have the power to turn instance-of-less-than-ideal-reaction into something-really-serious-that-should-affect-you-deeply. If we care to exercise that power and think it is in the best interests of our child.

Not knowing the context, can't say for definite whether the words was justified. But if the teacher really did single out a child and call him a disgrace for a relatively minor first-time infraction (which it might not have been) then I would say it wasn't the best choice of words. As far as a reaction goes, YABU to make anything of it with the school. I think there are two lessons you can teach your DS:

1. Talking in the line when he knows quite well it's not allowed is wrong, and the teacher had every right to tell him off.
2. Sometimes in life people don't choose the perfect word for the perfect occasion. In the interests of getting along with people, you can discuss with him how to deal with that reality which he will come up again time after time.

I'm not being ridiculous thanks very much

So why post on AIBU if you don't want to hear the contrary?

I fee sorry for your DS's teacher...

Sorry OP-my mistake-you didn't post on AIBU.

Still feel sorry for the teacher though

Bertie = OP ? I just wondered. Same typing pattern with no punctuation...

99.999999% yes, I'd say Irvine. One leaves the thread, one joins MN just to post on it....

Hey ho.

Now if the teacher had called the OP's dd a sock-puppet...

That's the sort of parent the teacher is up against! Prepared to create new identities to prove her precious son was told off unfairly. I can imagine the child is unpleasant regularly hence the harsh reprimand. She needs to get a reality check or her ds will be running rings round her in a few years.

Entirely depends on tone and context. It is not an offensive word and, in the right context and said in the right way, may have been entirely appropriate.

Like I said before, I am a foreigner, so I may not get real nuance of what the word really means. So I asked my DH(He is English). He said he find the word a bit strong, but still he thinks that it's ds' fault that if he was called disgrace, doesn't even think about complaining. (Glad about it, otherwise it could have ended up us divorcing!)

If what I suspect was true(OP = Bertie), she must know she is wrong? Otherwise why does she need to change her id to back herself up?