Oh, God - she has brought home...

[UnquietDad]

... the s*dding "Class Teddy".

I thought we'd left this behind in nursery. So now we've got to make up some exciting things that she and Teddy did this weekend. And we were going to have a quiet one. She can't really write "Teddy and I sat and watched Cbeebies while Mummy did her marking and Daddy read the Guardian", can she?

Why couldn't we have had him two weeks ago, when her grandparents came to visit and we went swimming? Aaaaaaaagh.

And I suppose we've got to try and match - or outdo - what's already in the book. Well, the last child to have had him seems to have been basically illiterate, but the one before is pretty good.

Oh, joy.

[morningpaper]

What about Teddy breastfeeding?

[MegaLegs]

I had no idea this was going on all around the country. DS2's Year 1 class are doing this. It will be our turn this week as it's done alphabetically. There is an unspoken rivalry amongst the parents as to who can come up with the most original photo - if we have him the night ds has his op we can have him in full scrubs, in theatre, scalpel in hand. ( Sorry, have found forgotten bottle of Raspberry stoli and have gone all surreal - best get over to the bar thread pronto.)

[morningpaper]

"Daddy watched mummy and daddy play a strange game of wobbling each other on the bed"

[motherinferior]

Unquiet Dad - just go and write it, now, a magificent work of anodyne fiction. It'll take you about five minutes. Take a couple of pics of the sodding bear in some sort of vaguely educational context (next to the computer, lolling on top of a book, that sort of thing). Then go and read the Guardian and drink beer all weekend

[nikkie]

ROFL at this thread!

[morningpaper]

The gerbil is GREAT batters!

[frumpygrumpy]

Please, someone give me an opinion on my thread before I have to leave........please, fgs, its make or break

[MegaLegs]

oo - I fancy a bit of a wobble when dh gets back.

[morningpaper]

Can you pout some sort of saddle on the cat and give Teddy a whip?

[motherinferior]

WTF would your DP steal a gerbil, batters? They're hardly rare, are they????

[ills]

I had a look at last years book. Teddy went sking, Paris for theweekend. Do you think a ride in a supermarket trolley will do

[morningpaper]

Lol

I would have been tempted to buy some brown fur from the Haberdashers and fashion a small gerbil-fur rug out of it for Teacher

[motherinferior]

Come on, even in Catford gerbils can't have that much resale value, can they?

[frumpygrumpy]

Would teddy ride Tesco or Waitrose?

[frumpygrumpy]

Does teddy take his turn cooking?

[IdrisTheDragon]

I had no idea that there are class teddies.

At least there isn't one in DS's pre-school so there is a while for me to get my writing skills up to scratch.

[motherinferior]

I've just remembered DD1 has a class teddy. We avoided him last year; I shall continue to do so, I think.

[MrsSpoon]

ROFL at the gerbil! Makes me realise that the teddy thing is getting off lightly, it could worse they could send home a gerbil!

When we had the teddy home I was ashamed not to do anything 'exciting' so we took him to the zoo at a cost of about forty quid and took a photo of DS1 holding him in front of the tiger's cage!