Oh, God - she has brought home...

[UnquietDad]

... the s*dding "Class Teddy".

I thought we'd left this behind in nursery. So now we've got to make up some exciting things that she and Teddy did this weekend. And we were going to have a quiet one. She can't really write "Teddy and I sat and watched Cbeebies while Mummy did her marking and Daddy read the Guardian", can she?

Why couldn't we have had him two weeks ago, when her grandparents came to visit and we went swimming? Aaaaaaaagh.

And I suppose we've got to try and match - or outdo - what's already in the book. Well, the last child to have had him seems to have been basically illiterate, but the one before is pretty good.

Oh, joy.

[Blu]

"Teddy posted on MN all w/e"
"Teddy drank Fruit Shoots"


I think that Class Teddies should have their own MN section! They could start threads:
"Help - can Teddies use a mooncup?"
"Could I be pregnant?"
"Am I being unreasonable - no MN connection in the footwell of the car!"
"What's this quinoa - I wanted Hunny!"

[UnquietDad]

Well, I'm sure you'll all be pleased to know that teddy had a good weekend and we didn't resort to putting him in the washing-machine. DD did a nice write-up, although we almost had a stand-up row because she wanted to start the report with "Me and Teddy went..." And I insisted she should put "Teddy and I".

"But everyone ELSE has put 'Me and Teddy'!"
"Yes, but everyone else is WRONG, DD!!"

[snowleopard]

Oh ffs! Class teddy? Is this what awaits me?

The more I hear about primary school the more I know I'm going to be every primary teacher's worst nightmare. I just will not be able to resist taking the piss if stuff like this happens.

[sis]

Ahem, Batters may I point out that surreal turn of this thread is more a little due to your posts! Thanks for posting them though - they have just made my day!

[NotQuiteCockney]

Hmmm, is it Animists who disapprove of photos as they steal people's souls? Or are there religions that disapprove of stuffed animals entirely? I'm looking to convert ....

[Greensleeves]

I had this a couple of weeks ago with Rosie the Rag Doll . I felt quite intimidated with the damn think gawping at me all evening. We took it to the allotment, sat it in a wheelbarrow and picked raspberries. I hope that's good enough for the teacher.

[dinny]

God, we had to take it on holiday all summer and do scrapbook (needless to say I spent a fraught hour before her first day back writing hilariously witty captions for pictures of bloody teddy with dd on the beach etc etc)

[indignatio]

Absolutely PMSL at this thread - I love the power of mumsnet. I now know that the innocent looking note in ds's school bag re going away somewhere - take teddy - is actually more than a mere poisoned chalice

[NotQuiteCockney]

Oh dear god. DS1's new class has a class teddy, we've already had tears because he didn't get it one weekend. I didn't realise we had to do something with it and do a report.

Gah, I hated the Easter Hat ludicrousness at the old school, now I have Teddybear Stupidity to enjoy.

Loving "Teddybear Spends Weekend in Footwell of Car", SD.

[sunchowder]

Brilliant thread Mumsnet at it's BEST.

[UnquietDad]

that's PENCIL. Gah.

[UnquietDad]

"some people have far too much time on their hands", DW remarked after seeing the Competitive Easter Egg display, which featured many a Humpty perched on a wall, Dalek, set of Teletubbies etc. The very idea that these could have all been done by the children's own hands is enough to cause hysterical laughter.

And the teacher knew it too. DW pointed to one lovingly-crafted exhibit and said in awe/disbelief "Did N really do that?" And Miss X sniggered and said "No, of course not. N can hardly even hold a penvil properly."

[twelveyeargap]

I am in stitches here. My DD (11) has read through and chortled as well. She was in school up to age 7 in Ireland. Never HEARD of class teddies. Arf! Have it all to look forward to. Guffawing at photoshopped teddy montage. Where to they find the time?

[Blu]

Batters - I am seeing your MIL in a whole new lifght, oh yes...digging up the gerbil...

Am still LOLing at the 'crunch'...

[geogteach]

Glad its not just me.
DS1 told his teacher we were going to London this weekend, so he got it. I had no plan for going anywhere, as its suposed to be geography I feel I ought to take it somewhere exciting but I like a lot of the ideas on here.

[UnquietDad]

class bear (upper)

class bear (middle)

class bear (working)

[Flamesparrow]

pmsl @ the gerbil

I seem to recall Psychomum shoving teddy in the washing machine because teddy was rank...a nd then drawing pictures of teddy drowing with his face up against the glass...

[codwiggle]

these thigns are shite
one upmaship by saddo parents

[SherlockLGJ]

Teddy got legless

We eventually found him in the gutter.

[MrsSpoon]

ROFL at the gerbil! Makes me realise that the teddy thing is getting off lightly, it could worse they could send home a gerbil!

When we had the teddy home I was ashamed not to do anything 'exciting' so we took him to the zoo at a cost of about forty quid and took a photo of DS1 holding him in front of the tiger's cage!

[motherinferior]

I've just remembered DD1 has a class teddy. We avoided him last year; I shall continue to do so, I think.

[IdrisTheDragon]

I had no idea that there are class teddies.

At least there isn't one in DS's pre-school so there is a while for me to get my writing skills up to scratch.

[frumpygrumpy]

Does teddy take his turn cooking?

[frumpygrumpy]

Would teddy ride Tesco or Waitrose?