What witty, non-aggressive and clever retorts do you give to parents who

[Technoprisoners]

ask what reading level/book band/nc level etc your dc is on?

This really annoys me. I have no wish to discuss my dc's levels or whatever with other parents at my dc's school, least of all random nosy feckers in the playground. Some really persist, no matter how I try to skirt round it.

So, what do you say to to shut 'em up for good?

"lemur? Cornflower blue? 87? I have no idea, I think the last one had a magic tangerine that granted wishes... or an orangutan... something like that anyway..." then wander away looking slightly dazed. That'll fox 'em

Juniper - am so nicking that.

lemarchands

Surely a 'why do you need to know?' would work, as they really can't have a good reason.

I've never been asked but my DC moved to a new school this year and DS2 is starting P1 after summer, and I know of a couple of parents who will ask.

They might just be trying to see of their child is okay or behind? It could just be harmless. If I ever ask by mistake, , then it would not be for
Comparing in the wrong way. It would be just to get some re assurance if I need to concentrat on any particular item
With my DC for example. I would be mortified if I pissed someone off by asking.

"Whiskey Galore! It's helping her understand the historical context of whisky, plus it's really sparked her interest. She's set up a little distillery in the basement! I'm so proud"

Can't say I've ever been asked, in 12 years, with 3 dcs, and 3 different schools, but I'm loving the "Why do you need to know?" response.
tbh, I could quite honestly have replied with "I haven't got a clue, we tend to read library books mostly at home" though.

Can't you just say you have no idea???

I have never known what reading level my children were on and have never been asked by anyone.

I've always been somewhat bemused by all this competitiveness re reading levels etc etc? As long as your child is doing fine what is the problem?

DS1 never seemed to be particularly interested in reading and seemed to view it a necessary chore. I did set myself the task of finding books he would enjoy reading and he now will choose and request books to read.

DS2 had a bit of a reading issue which the teacher felt was caused by the teaching method they had used and sought my agreement to try a different method which sorted the problem. Still don't know what reading level he's on though.

Yes I'd say "Why do you ask?" Always shuts people up

megabored I imagine if they were worried about their own DC they would possibly use this as the opener, as in a sorry to ask kind of way, rather than I'm a nosy bint kind of way.

I agree MrsMcEnroe, that is why people give up when they realise it isn't a race.
Why not just ask the teacher if you are worried?

The only times I've been asked are when a parent I'm friendly with is worried about her child. But I have heard stories at ds's school of parents who snoop in book-bags when a child comes round for tea. Maybe someone did snoop in ds's book-bag when he was tiny but it's no skin off his nose, or mine.

I've never been asked, but DD2's school have a chat in the diary, explaining level progression and where an 'average' pupil will reach by the end of each year (infant school).

Chart*

IndigoBell and exoticfruits:

Yes, I think I am embarrassed actually. But it's nothing to do with my dc's reading levels. I happen to think my 2 ds's are great readers and I'm confident my dd is ready to start school in September and will take to reading well.

No, it's embarrassment because they cross the line in to the personal. I don't mind chatting to anyone who asks about their reading generally, and indeed I try to keep these discussions as general and neutral as possible. It's when that question comes: "So, what colour book band is he/she on then?" that I dread. It's like being asked how much you weigh, by a complete stranger. It's odd and it's annoying. And I also feel embarrassed for them, that they feel the need to do that.

Re parents who just want reassurance because they don't get the full picture from teachers - that's not how I perceive it. Staff at the dc's school have always reported very clearly where they fit in relation to national standards. They will not divulge any pecking order in the class, and quite rightly too. And it is that which I think prods the insecurities of some parents, who need to know where their child fits in relation to their peers (as if that makes any difference whatsoever) and who seem, imho, to have the supreme arrogance of a) asking personal questions which are none of their business and, b) making judgements about children's reading skills which they know little or nothing about, in a professional sense.

I have come across the generally worried parents and have no trouble advising them or fielding their enquiries. I can understand that. It's the blatant other types which get me. Fortunately, they are in a minority, but they are out there.

My Book of Quotes is filling up nicely, thank you all! Love "beige or taupe" and I have perfected the art of looking vague years ago. Probably because I am.

I don't get embarrassed if people ask me personal questions- there is no need to reply. I don't tell anyone how much I weigh - unless they need to know.

I have been guilty of asking this question, but only to close friends, or people who has asked me in the past. I don't do it any more, but in Reception and yr 1 I was genuinely concerned about DS's reading. Turns out he's dyslexic and had a vision problem (so was right to be concerned), but has since caught up with the reading. With pfbs you have no idea what is 'normal' for their age. I won't be repeating it with DS2.

I guess it's British cultural to think of it as a personal question.

I don't think it is.

I never had any idea whatsoever if my child was being banded at all, let alone what band they were on.

I have had other parents worry at me about how the class teacher let them read joke books or suchlike for pleasure and wasn't this terrible. I waffled on, pretentiously and at length, about how reading is a primal pleasure and shouldn't be disturbed because of this, and they went away

I went through an education system during my early years where competition was encouraged. I agree it is rude to compare and not very nice but at an overall class level, where the brightest or more able is rewarded whether it's academic achievement or for a school play or sports. There should be some transparency of where ur child is in relation to the class, not just the national level. It would give an indication of how well the teacher is teaching too!

indigo I agree with you somewhat. It is very British to underplay any achievements. Therefore our kids tend to lack that inner self confidence that Americans seem to have. Maybe that's another debate.

platinum.

No one's actually asked to be fair but that's what I'd say if they did!

I am surprised parents would ask what reading level children are on as the children all seem to know what level all the others are on!

I would never ask someone what NC level their children is on but I really can't understand what the problem is if people did ask, if they don't like your answer then they shouldn't ask.

I was chatting to another parent once about an issue I had with the teacher saying DS was not really trying as hard as she thought he could in his writing (long story - she was talking crap but is a bit notorious for these sorts of comments). She was quite sympathetic at first and asked what level he was on, I told her (had never had any experience of levels at that time and thought it went a then b then c no the other way round) and she actually said she didn't believe me!!!!