Inappropriate teacher behaviour?

[urbanite]

My son is in reception and one of their newish teachers is a young male nursery worker. He has singled out a few of the boys, including mine, as his favourites, calls them 'my [name]' and 'my favourite boys'/ my gang - tickles their necks. It all feels a bit intrusive. All the other staff, male and female, have quite clear (possibly too much so) boundaries and don't seem to get close to the kids at all. It just seems slightly off - maybe more appropriate in nursery but even there I think it would be a bit odd. Not just because he's a man. Would you say something to a manager - not to try and cause a storm, but maybe just to alert him about appropriate boundaries? Or am I being silly?

How many times have you had ringworm and scabies Mrz?

So what? Nits, threadworms, ringworm, scabies - all (unfortunately) go with the job. The alternative is to resign, not to hold children who trust you and need comfort/reassurance, etc, at arm's length, fgs.

Scabies only once, ringworm lost count, ditto thread worm, never had nits not even as a child.

oh I missed out impetigo

Have worked in schools and a prison ed since 1996.
Scabies = 0
Tape worm = 0
Ring worm = 0
Threadworm - couple of times or so; very easily sorted with a tablet
Headlice = once - sorted with 10 mins of Hedrin

I think she'd rather be able to hug her children.

TBF I also have a primary school aged child - so could equally come from her or her friends too.

I still hug my own child regardless. The two are not mutually exclusive.

As it happens I would think your friend is very much in the minority with her hands off approach.

The only education based job I have had where I have been hands off (and I mean enitrley hands off on my part) is the prison ed.

I think she'd rather be able to hug her children.

What about the various viruses, stomach bugs, colds, flu, chickenpox, etc, etc germs? Can she hug her children having been in the presence of those afflictions? What's the difference?

Maybe she has OCD???

I still hug my own children and they have never had any of the above.

When I was training there was a man on the course who stated he went home from teaching practice and had a shower with dettol before he allowed his children near him ...he didn't complete the course

It sounds like she is definitely in the minority. She probably gets away with being hands off because she's so good at her job. My DCs school do hand holding and arms around the shoulders but no more than that. Definitely no sitting on the teacher's knee. She has to deal with a number of parents who don't treat, so the child is contagious all year. I think I'd draw the line at scabies myself, but she had it and got rid 3 times before stepping back.

My dcs teachers are always telling them a load of bollox along the lines of "this is the best group I've ever had"

I caught scabies in a very middle class private school ...

I don't think scabies are class sensitive.

obviously not and oddly enough I hadn't held hands with anyone

They can be in the scalp in children. Puts nits into perspective.

Actually it was a parent who was infected

i taught for many years in nursery, reception, y1, y2 and am a little puzzled about this problem. yes, children need hugs for comfort, playful cuddles sometimes and affection, but isn't tickling slightly different?
it sounds like the adult is initiating it and the children aren't in a situation where they need comfort or reassurance, and tickling is a bit irritating imo.
If he's trying to build a positive relationship with children in the school, this is a very odd way to begin, he sounds inexperienced and a bit desperate for the children to like him.
you need to ask for a straight answer - who is he? what is his job? but in as subtle way as you can, i agree that a witch hunt should be avoided.
shouldn't men working with children be more cautious that women about how thier behaviour might look?

So you have never taught a young child Round and round the garden like a teddy bear ...?

yes, in the context of singing time, not just random grabbing/tickling like this sounds.

or read the tickle monster book?

or the Tickle Book?

yes, but your examples are of tickling in a context with the expectation that tickling will be involved at some point, not just tickling for ticklings sake!

make a note if you can giving times, dates and examples. It is inappropriate and highly unprofessional!! take your notes and your concerns to the head asap. Good luck :)