4 year old got outside school gate today to car park

[Triggles]

I am extremely upset as when I went to pick up my 4yo DS (on his 3rd day of reception), the teacher told me that he had gotten out of the school gate from the playground and into the driveway and carpark, which is laid out so that about 30 feet to the left is a major busy street. I am absolutely livid, as:

1 - we were told the reception children didn't go into the main playground but played in a separate more secure playground. (which I'm now being told is not correct, that they play in the main playground for about 45 minutes at lunchtime)

2 - the teacher made great pains to state that the reason this happened was because he (DS) opened the gate and walked out, which the children are not supposed to do, and that "none of the other children have a problem with this rule" so now he has to sit/stand with one of the dinner ladies that monitors the playground during this time and hold their hand instead of playing. (rather than simply locking or monitoring the gate instead )

3 - I told his teachers (2 of them, they job-share) that he is a runner and will need extra attention until he is clear on the rules of where he can and cannot go. And that the first week or so would probably be the worst as he would be feeling a bit "exploratory" (isn't that pretty much common sense??) in a new surrounding. The teacher today said "well, we don't have enough staff to monitor him 1 on 1".. well, okay, then LOCK the stupid gate or monitor the GATE when they are out there playing.

I was very clear with her that I was not happy with the situation, especially that he was put in danger. She also mentioned in passing that on Friday he had made for the gate... (nobody told us about this!) shouldn't this have put them on guard about him and the gate so that today's incident shouldn't have happened??

I just get absolutely ill thinking about what could have happened... what if they hadn't found him in the carpark?? There is a main entrance directly to the road right there (in fact, he would have had to cross the small road by the carpark, which has limited view, so cars coming from either direction wouldn't see him until they were right on top of him. And another entrance on the other side of the carpark (it's a small carpark and he could be across it in a matter of minutes) that is always open as well, so he'd be out and lost in an unfamiliar neighbourhood. of course, there's the obvious concern about getting run over by a car as well.

I'm thinking of speaking to the head tomorrow and telling them I am not happy with this situation. The teacher thinks that he should be holding hands (for 45 minutes??) with the dinner lady on the playground and not playing tomorrow and then they are going to put a sign on the gate to remind him not to go through it. Personally, I think the gate should simply be secured during school hours and unlocked at beginning and end of school day, just like the other pedestrian gate. This is just a little wooden halfgate that is only closed by a shoot bolt. Doesn't this seem a more reasonable option??

I am also concerned that they are quick to point the finger at a 4 year old, rather than the fact that their lack of supervision allowed him to get to the carpark. Yes, he needs to be warned about safety, but it's his 3rd day.. and he's 4... and it's an insecure gate which makes it unsafe IMO...

I also question whether or not they advised the dinner ladies on the playground that he was a runner and a concern. I suspect not, as the teacher stated that they have NOW been warned. I'm so angry!!!! And I don't feel confident AT ALL in their ability to keep my child safe.

Any opinions or suggestions would be helpful, as right now I am simply to cross and freaked out to think clearly.

Personally I would be livid. I suggest a strongly worded complaint letter to the headteacher as surely the school has a duty of care to ensure that your child is safe.

Of course your child needs to be aware that he can not go out of that gate, but some children are inquisitive and the school grounds should be secure.

Hope someone is along soon to give you some more advice, off to have a look at school duty of care.

Speaking as a reception class TA as well as a parent there is absolutly no excuse whatsoever for this happening!

The playground supervision at your ds's school is clearly inadequate and tbh I think you would be perfectly reasonable to report the school to Ofsted.

They have a duty of care towards your son and other pupils, and having a child escaping from the playground is unacceptable!

At our school all exits from the playground to the street/carpark are locked by the caretaker after registration and remain locked until hometime

All access gates should be locked to keep the kids in and uninvited visitors out during the school day.
Is he a good reader? The sign they have suggested may not have the desired effect.

They wanted to put a sign on the door with the driving "no entry" sign on it (the circle with the line across the middle), but I pointed out that at 4 years of age, he's HARDLY up on the appropriate driving signs. He does, however, recognise the word STOP (although whether or not he'll actually stop is another matter), so I pointed out that STOP would be more appropriate. But again, the sign isn't really anything that will ACTIVELY stop him from going through the gate. A LOCK, however, WILL.

Thank you reference the comments that it should be locked. We thought it made the playground unsecure as not only could a child walk out (as DS did today), but ANYONE could enter from the open main or side entrance to the carpark, walk through this unlocked gate, and interact directly with children in the playground. To me, this makes for a very unsafe situation.

Gates at dd's school have a bit at the top that an adult can flip and open but children can't. How hard can it be to do something like that? I'm astonished that the gates are that easy for a child to open.

Have you spoken to your DS too? He needs to understand that he is not allowed to leave the playground. I know this was an area I was concerned about when my son started school many moons ago - when I mentioned it to the head when we visited he laughted and said they were pupils not babies & they had never lost a child yet. However, I had an obedient child that would not have wandered off, know others are different.

Although I agree that supervision is clearly poor in this situation, one reason they might not lock access points is due to fire regulations. The fire people can get very upset about locked access points (even into playgrounds).

I would be very angry too - this is simply not acceptable. I'd be speaking to the head tomorrow definitely.

i do think that at 4 he really ought to understand that he is not to go out of the gate.

that said, i also think it would be prudent of them to put a lock on the gate. not only to keep kids in, but to keep people out too.

i WOULD be cross, don't get me wrong. but I don't think it's all down to the school.

on your behalf - that is completely unacceptable, they are failing to safeguard your son and the other children from them exiting or others entering the premises.

LadyLapsang - yes, I have spoken to DS today and explained that he is not allowed to leave the playground and not allowed to open the gate. But he's 4, and it's a new environment, and I simply can't guarantee that he won't try it again. DS will sometimes wander off if he has the opportunity, and I was quite clear with the teachers prior to school (in 2 separate meetings!!) that this was an issue that needed to be monitored for awhile until he was clear on the rules and boundaries.

I find it aggravating that she now is going to make him stand and hold hands with the adult playground monitor for 45 MINUTES tomorrow while watching all the other children playing. He's going to be fighting to go play the entire time, or be crying, and then they're just going to think he's a horrible brat or something.

I've spoken to someone from Ofsted on the telephone now, and he's stated that the school has a duty of care to keep him safe and in this instance, they did not. I was advised to contact the school headteacher (which I will be doing tomorrow morning), and they will be notifying the appropriate person at the LEA.

That is unbelievable, I have never heard anything like it. Are you seriously telling me that while they are playing in the playground with one or two adults supervising a whole load of kids, anyone could open the gate and grap a child nearby or entice them out!? I have never been to a school where this is the case and I certainly would not be happy with my child being in a school that he could wonder out of. I think yos should complain to Ofsted. 4 is too young to take personal responsibility for their own safety. And what about younger children? Are there nursery children there? And what would worry me more is that noone noticed he'd gone.

I understand what people are saying about fires. I know at my son's school, the gate opens from the inside only and is at adult height. i don't see what is so hard about that.

I am so glad he was ok. You poor thing. I am not a helicopter parent and I dpn't over react about starnger danger etc but this is really lax imo.

I also happen to think that at 4 he should have been taught how to behave a bit better than that and that "a runner" is really code for ill-disciplined.

This is assuming he does not have learning disabilities.

The school have no excuse for letting him escape apart from the fact they don't employ trained zoo-keepers. Instead of writing to the LEA, try going to the library and getting a book on disciplining children at home

I do not think that the "punishment" is at all proportionate to your son's behaviour and that is what I would be most angry at.

Tbh, I can see the school's POV in that they cannot watch him every minute of the day, and saying "he is a runner" does not stop him having to obey the rules of the school.

Where we live the gate is never locked and the children just have to learn to stay within the playground.

so what?

Are you saying that children never mis-behave and if they do you are happy for them to get anhillated by a car - just punishment? How ridiculous.

Do you think all 4 year olds do what they are told all the time and never wonder off exploring without thinking? Do you have a 4 year old?

Preghead
Get a grip, would you. When we were at school the gates were never locked. Have you ever heard a case where a child was grabbed from school? Really.

I know that the Brits have gotten a bit paranoid about this in recent years (and I do understand the reason for it, in wake of such horrors such as Dunblane) but it is a bit out of hand now.

I am astoundede ofsted let any primary school get away with that. Adults yes fair enough, personal responsibility, they take their chances. But the whole point about small children, surely, is that they haven't yet or are learning it. Gobsmacked. No school round here leaves it to chance whether primary school age children stay in the grounds or not. Secondary, fair enough, but 4 year olds? Really?

Preghead
Did you misunderstand my post about the punishment? I meant that he should have to stand with the dinner lady, and that I thought it was disproportionate ie. too harsh.

I have a 6yo, for your information, and he is one to wander off. He only did it once in school and was spoken most severely to. He never did it again. He was about 4yo at the time, iirr.

Have you seen the gate?Is it easy to open? Might have been better to speak to the Head first before phoning Ofsted.

Yes I have - there were a series of attempted abduction from just before the school gates recently in Croydon near where I live. My friends sisters children were snatched by her ex partner from outside the school gates and taken abroad. And the whole point of these were that they were before the gates becasue the abductors couldn't get past the gates. But that is not the point - these incidents are extremely rare. As are the Dunblane ones. 4 year olds walking into the road daydreaming and getting mown down by cars aren't though.

While your children are with you it is your responsibility to teach them road sense, not to run off etc. But when they are at school, surely the school has a responsibility to try and keep them safe. They aren't born knowing this stuff and aren't little robots that will automatically do the right thing every time. I really am astounded you think this schoool's attitude is fine.

I saw a Dr Phil show that was about children abducted from their schools - so it does happen.

Looks like someone got their mammaries shut the door this morning....

ML I was addressing massivemammaries who thinks it's all the childs fault - I know what you mean about the punishment being unfair

I am not sure if I think it is ok, tbh. Here where I live it would be nothing unusual and I am sure that the children here are not generally better behaved than children in UK.

My children go to a school where the gate is never locked. They are fine.

And if an ex-partner is determined to abduct a child, then a locked gate is not going to stop them.

Of course, if it has been on Dr Phil, then it must happen all the time

There is this thing called risk assessment, which should be being carried out by the school.
It is not that difficult to undestand that at playtime one of the biggest risks is that of a child wandering off and that an inviting gate is a natural place to do that. As such the risk assessment should have bought out the fact that the school needed a school dinner lady /playground monitor positioned relatively close to the gate to stop this happening. The next steps are to ensure that this is made more difficult to achieve - it is never going to be 100% safe as children will always find a way around something. As others have said a more secure mechanism on the gate is sensible, but another easy visible sign to children is to paint a 2 metre wide strip in red by the gate. The pupils in my primary school are taught not to go on the red warning strip.
Not matter what they do the school have a duty of care and you need to be making a formal complaint to the headteacher as the most sensible way of making the school think more about this lapse in their care.

I don't think it's all the childs fault and I didn't say that. I do think that if the parent fails to discipline the child to the extent it needs to be under lock and key all the time (even at 4 years old)

It is not fair to blame the school entirely.

Yes the school should lock the gate, yes they have a duty of care to the child, but the parents cannot abdicate from their responsibility to teach a child how to behave.