4 year old got outside school gate today to car park

[Triggles]

I am extremely upset as when I went to pick up my 4yo DS (on his 3rd day of reception), the teacher told me that he had gotten out of the school gate from the playground and into the driveway and carpark, which is laid out so that about 30 feet to the left is a major busy street. I am absolutely livid, as:

1 - we were told the reception children didn't go into the main playground but played in a separate more secure playground. (which I'm now being told is not correct, that they play in the main playground for about 45 minutes at lunchtime)

2 - the teacher made great pains to state that the reason this happened was because he (DS) opened the gate and walked out, which the children are not supposed to do, and that "none of the other children have a problem with this rule" so now he has to sit/stand with one of the dinner ladies that monitors the playground during this time and hold their hand instead of playing. (rather than simply locking or monitoring the gate instead )

3 - I told his teachers (2 of them, they job-share) that he is a runner and will need extra attention until he is clear on the rules of where he can and cannot go. And that the first week or so would probably be the worst as he would be feeling a bit "exploratory" (isn't that pretty much common sense??) in a new surrounding. The teacher today said "well, we don't have enough staff to monitor him 1 on 1".. well, okay, then LOCK the stupid gate or monitor the GATE when they are out there playing.

I was very clear with her that I was not happy with the situation, especially that he was put in danger. She also mentioned in passing that on Friday he had made for the gate... (nobody told us about this!) shouldn't this have put them on guard about him and the gate so that today's incident shouldn't have happened??

I just get absolutely ill thinking about what could have happened... what if they hadn't found him in the carpark?? There is a main entrance directly to the road right there (in fact, he would have had to cross the small road by the carpark, which has limited view, so cars coming from either direction wouldn't see him until they were right on top of him. And another entrance on the other side of the carpark (it's a small carpark and he could be across it in a matter of minutes) that is always open as well, so he'd be out and lost in an unfamiliar neighbourhood. of course, there's the obvious concern about getting run over by a car as well.

I'm thinking of speaking to the head tomorrow and telling them I am not happy with this situation. The teacher thinks that he should be holding hands (for 45 minutes??) with the dinner lady on the playground and not playing tomorrow and then they are going to put a sign on the gate to remind him not to go through it. Personally, I think the gate should simply be secured during school hours and unlocked at beginning and end of school day, just like the other pedestrian gate. This is just a little wooden halfgate that is only closed by a shoot bolt. Doesn't this seem a more reasonable option??

I am also concerned that they are quick to point the finger at a 4 year old, rather than the fact that their lack of supervision allowed him to get to the carpark. Yes, he needs to be warned about safety, but it's his 3rd day.. and he's 4... and it's an insecure gate which makes it unsafe IMO...

I also question whether or not they advised the dinner ladies on the playground that he was a runner and a concern. I suspect not, as the teacher stated that they have NOW been warned. I'm so angry!!!! And I don't feel confident AT ALL in their ability to keep my child safe.

Any opinions or suggestions would be helpful, as right now I am simply to cross and freaked out to think clearly.

Oh please. Don't be ridiculous. I never once mentioned suing. And I simply want them to be more diligent in their care. It was an incident that pointed out a problem in the security of their playground and posed a potential risk. It needs to be dealt with from a number of different angles, one of which (sigh.. as I've already mentioned nuuuumerous times) is reinforcing the rules with my son. It also, however, means that the school needs to take some steps as well.

It's unfortunate that your daughter is in hospital, but it really is not relevant to my situation, and I suspect that this colours your view of my situation somewhat. I would suggest you step back and reassess your own frame of mind, rather than snipe at me.

I don't expect perfection from my child's teacher. I do, however, expect appropriate action to a potentially dangerous situation, and solutions that are geared to a four year old, not someone of driving age. It would also have been appropriate for the school to admit some fault in this, rather than attempting to push all the blame on a four year old who is still trying to learn the rules. Again, there was never any intent to sue, I simply need to know that there are APPROPRIATE measures taken to resolve the problem so that I know it will not happen again.

A few years ago when my kids were still in primary, two new reception kids decided they didn't want to be in school and walked all the way home, across two roads - one of which was busy.

Apropos of nothing, just to point out that it isn't a new problem.

The school's solution?

They moved the locks on the gates up to adult head height, problem solved.

pixie - what happened with dd? want to talk about it?

x-post

That is terrible, not only that it was allowed to happen but that they tried to blame your ds. My ds's school has an 8ft metal gate which is padlocked 5 mins after school starts and not unlocked till 5 mins before home time, they have a separate entrance to get to the office that the children have no access to. Imo that is how all schools should be.

Pixie, as I explained, Ofsted does not regulate schools, but they do inspections, which include child safety. I did not call to make a complaint, but to ask about what things the school was required to do as far as playground and general security regarding the children, and to ask them what the appropriate course of action would be. I did not want to walk in to speak to the head with inaccurate information about what the school is and is not required to do to ensure the safety of the children with regards to playground access. I do see that they are placing a sign, however, I do not feel that is adequate. It is a poor substitute for closer supervision at the problem site, simply placing one of the playground monitors close to the gate to make sure no children access it. When I mentioned it, the teacher said she felt the sign was better than someone watching the gate, which I simply don't agree with. And I don't think standing with a playground monitor for 45 minutes, holding her hand, and not being allowed to play is going to be anything but extremely detrimental to him. He will be forced to stand there, watching the other children play, will not have the opportunity to burn off some energy, so will be restless and inattentive afterwards. It is much akin to putting him in timeout and watching everyone else have fun for 45 minutes, which is ridiculous and OTT for a 4yo. Not to mention it will tie up one monitor that will be needed to assist watching ALL the children, when that monitor could more effectively be positioned near the gate and simply monitor children from near the gate as well as keeping an eye on the gate.

I think we rather reached the sniping point with the comment about whether or not he understood traffic lights since he didn't drive, which I feel was unnecessary and inflammatory.

oh pixie, that sounds very stressful. at least they worked it out quickly and she's getting the right care now. wondered if it was asthma related

hope you manage to get some rest x

Pixie hope she's ok now, what a horror for you... hope you got some rest and you get her home today (have name changed but our daughters broke their legs at the same time last year)

Triggles, I had to step away from this thread yesterday as I just could not believe there were some people who thought you were overreacting or that this incident was your fault for not disciplining your 4 year old enough. Just wanted to continue to add my support - I still think you did the right thing. Whether or not you called ofsted too early or not, the school are not giving you a satisfactory response now so I would say it is definitely appropriate to raise it further now (no one is talking about suing anyone ffs not that that would ever work since, thankfully, he wasn't injured).

I also think it is interesting that the 2 people on this thread who actually work with schools of for an LEA were equally as horrified as you and indicated that in their areas, the schools simply put bolts that open outwards at adult height on the gate - and that this is what they and most people would expect.

I mean I understand the concept of natural selection, survival of the fittest etc, but are people here really saying they are happy to just let their 4 year olds take their chances on urban streets where no one knows where they are or where they've gone - it's day three, you've been told at least twice not to go out of the gate so it's your fault if you get hit by a truck - that or your parents for not having managed to turn you into a blindly obedient automaton at all times by the time you started Reception. Bloody hell that is not why I had kids! (and am not PFB either, on third child, very much in favour of discipline).

Whata shame his first week of school is being coloured by such a horrible (and unecessary) incident. I hope something is put in place so you don't have to spend the next year at work/home worrying if today is the day he will get lost/run over (my son has just started Y1 and it is only now really I would be reasonably confident that he would never wonder off - and there are still kids in his class who probably would).

Triggles - for what it's worth I totally agree with your astonishment and upset.

You have done exactly the right thing IMO and you need to follow it through no matter how frustrating and stressful it may get.

There are obviously issues at your school and why wait until a child has strolled out and been killed by a car/fallen in a pond/been snatched etc.etc.

There were many 'unhappy' children at DCs old school and a number of them on a number of occasions just decided to 'walk' because they knew they could. One memorable occasion of the deputy head running like billyo to try and catch an 8 yr old.

These kids are not stupid, just frustrated.

Just to say that since the recent safety at school initiative the gates have been locked (much to the disgust of some of the parents as they have to wait at the gates now or take a little longer to walk around to the school reception - can you believe it!) Children should not now - in theory - be able to 'escape'. TBH, thought this had to happen now in all schools - certainly happens at DCs new school too.

I took DS#1 to pick up his younger brother from school the other day. He was telling me about the yellow line around the main playground - jokingly called it the 'Yellow Line of Doom' and that no-one dared cross it . And they didn't. No-one did. it didn't occur to anyone to do so. Not sure what I am trying to say really - other than IME most children are keen to stick to the rules, even DS#2 who is 'sprited' at home is a stickler for rules at school. So perhaps the school hasn't experienced a child doing a runner before? I don't think it's that common.

Well, just wanted to update. I spoke to the head teacher today. She told me that they had a staff meeting last night as she was not happy with the way the incident had been handled. She told me that she did not agree with the playground monitor holding DS's hand all during the playtime (almost 45 minutes), as it smacked of "time out" and would be perceived as a punishment for DS, which was not appropriate. She also stated that she was going to have the gate assessed immediately and either have the latch changed to something the children can't just open, or put a full size gate with a higher latch that the children cannot reach on it, as she agrees that the security (or lack of) at the gate is a major concern. She agreed that if DS going out the gate was a concern (which it should have been if he went for the gate on Friday), then there should have been a priority for the playground personnel to monitor the GATE, not specifically DS, as the gate is the ONLY route out of the playground that is not locked (other than going back into the school where all the outgoing doors are switch locked to get out so he couldn't leave the school in that way), thus ensuring nobody would be going through the gate. (basically using the idea that they may lose sight of him briefly which she said is apparently what happened, but it's not like they would ever lose sight of the gate which is sort of STATIONARY )

Until they can correct the security of the gate, they are putting DS and some of his classmates in a smaller enclosed playground (so that nobody is really feeling singled out) - and she stated it wouldn't be like a punishment or anything as it's got particular playground equipment that the children really love to play on (pirate ship thing?).

She didn't think we were overreacting and completely understood why we were concerned about his safety while at the school. She also stated clearly that the school needed to improve the security at this gate and was going to take measures to fix it. So I am well pleased with that.

I also called back Ofsted and told them that I had spoken to the head teacher (as I told them I wanted to do that first prior to them going any further) and that we were in agreement on how to resolve the situation, and they were happy with that.

Is there a reason why you didn't go to the headteacher first, before you rang Ofsted?

Glad it has been resolved.

Yes, most 4yos can stick to the rules but the odd few won't, and do they deserve to be hit by a car for that?

good news - that sounds just the right response - calm and measured but stopping the problem in the future. Hope you can relax now and he can enjoy school.

The head seems to have handled it all very well.

feenie as I've said previously on this thread, I called them to ask what the requirements were regarding security in the playground/school grounds area, so that I would have some idea of where I stood when I spoke to the headteacher. As previously explained, I told Ofsted that I wanted to speak to the headteacher before they went any further, and that I was planning to speak to the headteacher today, and they were fine with that. As I mentioned before, Ofsted do not regulate primary schools, they just inspect them, so they wouldn't be stepping in to do something anyway, they would refer it to the LEA. But they can advise on what the school is required to do in regards to security and were able to provide me with some helpful information.

sorrento yes, she did, and I was immensely relieved. She even stopped to chat with me when I went to pick up DS afterschool to give me an update of the assessment they did on the fence and stated they are going to be putting a lock on it this week. Just a huge load off my mind.

But if you'd spoken to the head in the first place, then presumably the same outcome would have been achieved?

I don't think it's a good idea to ring Ofsted in the first instance - it won't help in building effective relationships with the school. It's the worng way way round to handle things, imo.

Glad to hear they are acting sensibly re these issues Triggles and also wanted to say I totally understand your concerns and in my opinion sensible actions to ensure there is no repeat. I fail to understand why those criticising you on this thread think your child should be a perfect angel who never does anything wrong. Children simply are not like that! I have good kids, but I wouldn't put it past them to try something out of curiosity especially in a very new situation.

feenie Sorry that you don't agree, but I'm quite comfortable with calling Ofsted to find out what the school is and isn't required to do. It provided me with a better idea of what type of suggestions for solutions would be more appropriate, not only for my son, but for the school as well. It's just a simple matter of doing homework before going in to speak to the school further. It's not a matter of building an effective relationship with the school - I called them for advice and they provided that. They were happy to hold off on any further until I spoke to the headteacher, but were happy also to provide me with information needed and gave me a few suggestions that were helpful as well. I then called them back and updated them on the situation and they were again quite happy with the results, so it will go no further. They are not just there for inspections and such. And please remember they do NOT regulate primary schools as such. They are a RESOURCE to be used by both schools and parents. THAT IS ONE OF THE REASONS THEY ARE THERE!!!! What's the point of speaking to the headteacher to discuss possible options without understanding the entire situation and where the school stands legally on these types of things. That would be a complete waste of not only my time, but the school's time as well.

I see your point but surely if there is an issue wrt a child's safety it doesn't matter what their legal responsibilities are? They need to act to prevent accidents.