Daughter has hair down to knees! Now wants it cut short

[Josie1968]

Hello

My daughter will be 11 years old in August .. her hair is down to her knees, she’s never wanted it cutting but I cut her fringe and trim the ends. Suddenly she’s decided she wants it cutting which is absolutely fine I’ve no issue with that, but the style is extremely short and I’m not sure that her hair will suit the style if you know what I mean? I’m worried mainly that once it’s cut she doesn’t like it, that’s happened to me a few times!

I’ll put some pics on the thread for people to see. She gets a lot of compliments about her hair but she always has it in a plait as it gets so knotty. For sure if she gets it cut it will be easier for her to manage as she starts secondary in September and will have to be out the house for 07:45 to catch the school bus. I’m also a bit worried kids will think she’s a boy, as she won’t wear skirts or dresses, and her name is Frankie!! She’s a bit of a tomboy 😊

I did take her to a hairdresser who is happy to cut it but says it will need styling to maintain. Well I’m rubbish with hair, I’m a wash & go type of person and never use hair products. I just thought I’d see what people think.

Thank you! :)

Could she be persuaded to cut it in stages so it's not such a drastic change?

My dd did similar. Very long to extra short. Raised money for the charity that make wigs for kids undergoing chemo, and sent the hair there too.
It grows back, don't worry about it!

I’d do it in stages. Let her have it cut now to shoulder length and then if she still wants it short by the end of the summer holidays it will be less of a shock.

Dd went from knees to shoulders so not extreme short. She was very happy with it.
Anyway, just mentioning in case you hadn't heard about it, she could donate to Little Princess Trust who organise making wigs out of it for cancer patients

It's only hair, it grows back. If she would like it short just let her have it cut short.

This is daughter’s hair the others are styles she’s thinking of x

I'm another donator to The little princess trust. It takes about 2 years for my hair to grown to its longest.

I usually go for a short bob that I can wash and wear, I think that is a bit of a safer bet than a pixie cut but I have had long hair and short hair and I actually enjoy the going from long to short.

And another possible..this one might go better..?

It's her hair. But a faffy one I'd steer to something a bit more manageable so I wasn't being roped in. Ultimately though she should be allowed to do the hair lessons like we all did.

Definitely ask her about donating it though.

I would go for a shoulder length bob and then if she still wants it shorter, then she can have the pixie.
I would not worry about her being mistaken for a boy.

She will need to learn how to maintain her new hairstyle.

You could ask if one of the juniors / trainee could be booked to spend a hour to show her how to use brushes, a hairdryer and styling products etc.

And I second seeing if she can donate her hair to a cancer charity, that way if she gets upset once the deed is done she knows that her hair is going to a good cause.

Thanks for the messages, yes I’ve heard of donating hair :) I know a few who have done that. A great cause. ❤️

I’m all for getting it cut if that’s what she wants, it’s a lot easier for me as it’s me who has to spend time getting all the knots out! 😅😅 and I’ve said if she doesn’t like it it’ll grow back :)

just not sure whether the styles she’s chosen will work on her hair as they look like they have really thick hair. It might be better if she has it layered or feathered?

That’s a good idea thank you x

You will be surprised how thick her hair feels once you cut it that short.
Very fashionable cut and from what I can see of her, it will suit her.

I would really encourage her to do it, she is old enough to make that descision

Just let her cut it!
A long plait is quite a young hair style. I also don't think you should cut it but into another style that you or other mumsnetters like. Let her have agency over her own body. It isn't permeant or outrageous in any way.

Those pictures are of hair that is very different to hers. Plus they’re hardly even styles.

id try to steer her towards an undercut bob. It will give her the shortness she is after but with a bit more flexibility

Suggest you say yes to a big chop but to her shoulders, for example.

Then she can learn to take care of it herself.

As PP have said, hair grows, and it's so silly to fight over this, she'll only try to assert her independence in less reversible ways.

I love the new hairstyle, it’s so cool. It is quite androgynous but that might be what she’s going for if she’s a tomboy.

Just a thought. Both those women have quite thick hair & whilst your daughters hair is lovely it looks quite fine, so she may find it doesn’t sit fluffy & out without quite a bit of styling. It’s a great mad professor look though! And yes she has to make her hair choices herself. I had my hair v short around that age (my mum cut it ) and yes, lots of people thought I was a boy.

I know, it’s probably my worries. I had really short hair when I was 10.. back in the days when your mother took you to hairdressers and told them how to cut it 😅 people always thought I was a boy, and call me ‘young man’ I used to be mortified!! 😂😂 But to be fair I don’t think it would bother my daughter anyway!

If she doesn’t like it for any reason it will grow back.

Longer hair always looks and feels thinner, mines collar bone length and it looks a lot thinner/finer compared to when I had short hair. Even if her hair is a bit thin, good styling can overcome that.

Has her hair even got a wave to it?

Haha yes mad professor is actually a good description of my daughter tbf!!

If she is to have her long hair cut off please go to a hairdresser who knows how to do it so it can be donated to the Princess Trust who make wigs for children with cancer.

Let her have it, it will grow back. I like the sound of your daughter and it doesn’t sound like a bob would suit her personality at all.

They’re not the most interesting of hair cuts (she says, as someone about to go and get one today, but I am 50!)