Please talk me through your abortion

[Ffshowcouldthishappen]

Maybe this needs a trigger warning, I don't know.

I have been monumentally stupid - I am aware of this and don't need to be told.

So last week I really stupidly had unprotected sex with a friend. We aren't seeing each other and don't want to be. Thursday I thought my period was starting, bit early but I'm peri-menopausal so not unexpected. Bit of blood, then nothing. I've been pregnant 4 times (2 children, 2 miscarriages) and I have had implantation bleeding in 4 out of 4 of them and they were exactly like what I've just had. It's obviously too early for a pregnancy test but I suspect the worse based off previous pregnancies. I do not want another child.

So, how easy is it in England to access an abortion at 4-5 weeks? How much does it cost (I assume I'll have to go privately?) and what's it like?

Thank you.

I might be coming across a bit cold, but I'm just really spiralling right now. I can't believe what an idiot I've been.

Hand hold OP. If you are early (before 10 weeks) then you can take some tablets at home. this can be organised through your GP or other organisations such as BPAS. If you know the date of your last period this can be done over the phone with no need for a scan. This is free of charge.
If you need any further details let me know x

I think you're massively jumping the gun, make a doctor's appointment and tell them everything. You need more support than MN can give you with this.

You could try BPAS if it does turn out your pregnant, i believe you can choose tablets and i think it’s free (or it was when my friend contacted them)

You should also get STI screening done! Some sexual health clinics also have contraception/family planning/abortion services which are free. You'd need to call your local clinics to see what services they provide though.
https://www.nhs.uk/nhs-services/sexual-health-services/find-a-sexual-health-clinic/

Yes I was already intending to get an STI screening but it's too early at the moment. Got to wait 7 weeks for gonorrhea and Chlamydia and 3 months for some of the others.

Thanks for the advice so far.

Trying to avoid my GP to be honest, it's really hard to get an appointment.

If it’s last week you might be able to go to the GP or sexual health clinic and have a coil put in as emergency contraception. I hope you are ok.

I hope you’re ok.

you might be better asking for this to be moved to pregnancy choices?

@Permittedperson thanks, I didn't realise there was a pregnancy choices section.

@mumsnet any chance it can be moved?

@cheeseforever unfortunately there's no emergency coil appointments available which would be in the window. If I hadn't been such an idiot and waited before checking my dates, I could have done that.

I'm such an idiot.

You need to report your post to mumsnet tagging them won’t help.

good luck.

I’ had a medical abortion (tablets) this week.
I found it easy to access. TBH I just googled abortion clinic and the name of the place I live.
It was funded by the NHS, I think it varies by organisation/clinic - when I first enquired the website asked for my postcode to check NHS funded services were available in my area.
I had 12 days from my initial telephone call to book until my actual appointment to get the tablets- this is because I had to have a scan first as I’d taken the morning after pill. If I hadn’t had to have a scan, I could have had a telephone consultation sooner and the tablets sent to me.
I hope your suspicions are wrong and that it’s a false alarm. Happy to answer any questions you may have.

Thank you @GimmePizza I really appreciate that.

How are you feeling? How soon after taking the tablets is it until it kicks in? I have googled some local services. I don't think I need a scan, I've got my dates for the whole of this year.

2 more days and I'll know.

@GimmePizza hope your experience of ma was ok. I’m 6 weeks today have received the pack via bpas and need to take the first one today but I’m literally shaking worrying about it all

Hope you are ok.

Period is due tomorrow. I've got a test ready.

I took the first tablet on Wednesday, second set on Thursday. It took around 2-3 hours after taking the tablets on the Thursday for things to start. It was very painful for several hours but manageable with paracetamol and ibuprofen and nowhere near as bad as I thought it would be. Have only had mild cramping every so often since. Bleeding is like a very heavy period with clots but fine with maternity pads.
I’m mostly ok, I have had a couple of days where I have felt sad about it as the realisation of what has happened sinks in.

overall my experience of MA has been ok and nowhere near as bad as I thought it was going to be, I read some total horror stories! It’s a big thing to actually take the first tablet. Did you take the first one yesterday?

Yeh took the first one yesterday and just inserted the tablets. So nervous xxx

I hope you are doing ok, one of the worst parts is the waiting and anticipating what’s to come next. Hoping it’s over for you quickly, make sure you take care of yourself- watch tv/read books or something to keep you distracted.

How did you get on OP?

The test is negative. But my period hasn't shown up yet. I can't relax until it does.

Test was positive today. Fuck.

@Ffshowcouldthishappen hope you're ok, I know how much of a shock it is getting that positive.whatever you decide you’ve got this and will be ok x

Thank you @Shalalalalaohbaby

How are you doing now? I've requested an appointment via bpas online form.

I know what I want to do. I'm just unsure whether to tell my friend.

I’m doing ok. Iv got a lot of other stuff going on which I’m stressed about but in terms of the abortion I know Iv made the right decision. The dad has blocked me on all social media and my number hasn’t even asked how I am just checked id gone through with it. I’m relieved it’s done. I’m still bleeding and passed a few small clots today but apart from that I feel well and I think the bleeding a sign it’s worked it’s just like a heavy period xxx

Bpas were bril im shocked how quickly it’s all been sorte. Just post on here if you need ongoing support. If you can I would tell someone I was so anxious but telling my friend really helped xxx