Experience of Surgical Abortion at 8weeks

[GladWeNowHaveChoices]

Hi
I don't think I've ever added a thread, but I did search the archives when I was making my decision, so thought I'd add my experience to help anyone in the same situation.
I found out I was pregnant with baby no. 5 about 4 weeks ago. I tried to feel happy, and to imagine another new born but all I felt was dread. So found myself looking for my options, and 2 weeks ago, phoned BPAS.
I got a callback from my local trust the following day, and the girl was brilliant. She explained my options, but though my own reading up, I had decided a surgical was the better option for me than medical, as I couldn't face seeing what would actually come away. Once I had said this, she said she thought it was the right option for me at the stage I would be at at the time of the procedure.
2 days ago, I went for my first appointment. A lovely doctor did a scan (monitor turned away from me), talked me through what would happen, and stressed that once I took the tablet that she gave me, it really was a done deal as this tablet could cause fetal abnormalities if I then decided to continue with the pregnancy.
Once I'd taken the tablet, a fabulous nurse took my bloods and got me to do a vaginal swab... And I was free to go.
This morning, I had the first appointment at the hospital. My husband took me up, to where we were greeted by the same nurse that id seen before. She took us into a waiting room, where my blood pressure would be taken. Unfortunately my nausea got the better of me and I was sick, but again, the nurse was fantastic and so reassuring.
Blood pressure normal, the doctor came in and gave me anti sickness tablet, and before long I had the gown on and was led into the second room. I had assumed my husband would be in with me but he was left in the waiting room.
Onto the bed, legs in stirrups, and the doctor explained every stage of the process. I was offer d gas and air, and some other wee whistle-like pain relief that you inhaled, but neither was necessary. One nurse on one side of me did a scan the whole way through to guide the doctor, the other nurse held my hand on the other side.
There was a little discomfort as they administered the local anaesthetic, and then what I can only describe as bad period cramps as the vacumn did it's job.within 10 minutes it was done, I went back in to my husband and got dressed. I would advise a sanitary towel for immediately after. There hasn't been much bleeding yet but enough that you just want the confidence that you're protected.
We came home and I've rested up, and am keeping paracetamol levels up to keep the cramp-y pain at bay.
Overall, if you're at this stage of pregnancy and know that continuing with the pregnancy is not an option, I'd recommend it. One of the nurses came in afterwards with tea and toast, and said it's much more clean cut and less traumatic for the woman.
I'm just thankful for the service and that I could avail of it. We're in northern Ireland, so up to very recently this would not have been an option for me. It's not something I ever saw myself doing, but here we are. I will avail of the informing choices councilling services in the coming weeks, but at the minute, no regrets. I've done the right thing for my family and the children that I already have.

@Cannotcopewiththis it sounds like a shock but at least the wait is over. I hope you can build your life back together. And maybe that friend you told will come round. I haven't told any friends. Some people I know have fertility issues so I don't think it would be fair on them. And my general thought and guilt around that stops me. And while I think it's likely they'll be sympathetic, you just don't know.

So ....I took the first tablet yesterday. I found out two weekends ago now, and never wanted to abort before my child's birthday party, which was yesterday. I was going to wait until the counciling on Monday but decided, while I was scared and it's not what my husband wants, it's what I want. I never wanted to be pregnant, I just didn't want to do an abortion either....I spoke to a couple of different people on the Samaritans phone line. I read (I know I shouldn't) the week by week pregnancy development. Around it's developing its brain very quickly and will be turning from an embryo to a feutus. Looking forward the next two weeks there is always one reason or another in life why I don't want to do it then. And in the meantime the pregnancy symptoms would probably increase and I'm putting myself through unnecessary suffering.

After I took it I felt immediately sick, I think that was psychological, but kept myself busy. This morning I woke up feeling refreshed for the first time in a week and I'm not bursting into tears. I don't know how much is the pregnancy not developing anymore and how much is the psychological relief of making a decision. Now I could start the painful process tonight, or tomorrow. I have councolling with nupas still booked on Monday afternoon, which I still think will be helpful, especially if i struggle to take the second tablets.

I know this thread is on surgical.

@Bramblecrumble22 don't worry about this thread being surgical rather than medical. You found it, and if it helps you through, you write all you need to here.

The psychological (no clue if that's spelt correctly) relief in actually making a decision is real. I know I immediately felt relief after just making a call, and then my first appt, knowing that I had taken action helped.

I deliberately didn't look at development week by week, I needed to stay detached. But I did ask if "it" could or would feel pain with the process. The doctor assured me that it wouldn't, that the nerve system didn't develop until (I think, some parts are a blur) around 18-20 weeks. Knowing that helped.

Hopefully you will find someone to confide in. I took a big gamble telling a friend one day I unexpectedly met her, and she insisted on going for coffee. And it helped me no end. Having someone validate all my reasons, and basically tell me I'm not a bad person or mum for making that decision was a huge part of my recovery.

I hope all goes ok for you today and tomorrow. Sending huge hugs for you to get through it x

Thank you @GladWeNowHaveChoices

I did it last night and it really wasn't that bad. My little one needed a breastfeed just after I started bleeding, and that caused things to speed up, like post natally. But I had just half an out of uncomfortable cramping, after that just similar cramping to how I've been feeling the past 2 weeks of my pregnancy. And I slept between going to the toilet every 2 hours and passing clots three times. It wasn't painful, just blobby. The second time I coughed on the loo and something big fell. There was no way of seeing anything because the toilet water was all red. On the pad was just fresh blood. I filled 2 maxi pads full then the third was lighter and no more clots so went to normal sanitary towels. I didn't even need painkillers, I look some ibuprofen in preparation then paracetamol at 2, because I was a little achy, getting a headache and wanted to sleep well. I could easily have done without.

@Bramblecrumble22 I'm so glad to hear it went ok for you. I think definitely sometimes it's the fear we build up in our minds that is worse than the actual thing itself.

Take care and hopefully things go back to normal for you soon.

Yes, there were 4 points where I felt awful. When I took the first pill, felt sick and I'm sure it was psychological as it was instant and I didn't get side effects. Then psycing myself up for the unknown of inserting the medicine....Timescale and pain varying women to women. Then the time I coughed out a blob, I was expecting more and pain to follow, but that was the top of the hill and it was better from then. Then when my husband said something hurtful, half asleep and I was feeling cold and vulnerable. So I cried for a bit. He didn't even remember in the morning!

Sorry to jump on the post and I hope you are all doing well. It’s a traumatic process and tough decision to go through and I’m just reaching out as I feel very alone.
I am 4 + 6 weeks pregnant and will be 5 + 3 at the time of my surgical procedure. I have an ultrasound booked before then to confirm how far I am along.
Since reading this thread, I will be asking whether I’m too early for a surgical abortion as BPAS didn’t mention I would be or if there would be a higher risk of complications. I wanted this over as soon as possible but I also fear excessively bleeding at home with the tablets.
Just hoping for some reassurance as I can’t find anything online to say I’m too early.

Good luck, I don't know about risks but I think for any abortion the earlier it is the lower the risk. However, I think medical procedure is cheaper, quicker to get started (no waiting lists) and doesn't require travel. So that's why it's recommended early. It really wasn't even a fraction as bad as I was imagining.

@Chickenfeed1 I'm not sure if it's riskier, my conversation with the lady that booked me in (from BPAS) went through the options. Once I voiced my preference to go surgical, she agreed this was a better option for me at 8 or 9 weeks (I'm forgetting exactly how far I was). She said that the doctor that would be performing the procedure preferred the pregnancy to be a bit further on, as it was easier to ensure that it all came away, and that earlier, she would recommend medical.

All that being said, this was with the doctor in my local hospital in mind. I am sure that when you were booked in, they knew your dates and how far you would be. But it's worth a call to put your mind at rest before you go through with it.

Best of luck, and come back here for support if you need to x

Hi, I'm commenting here as I'm in NI and worried shitless

I had an ablation and my tubes tied over a year ago and have found out today I'm pregnant.

No idea how far, I'm assuming not massively but my boobs are huge and I am starting to look slightly bloated.

I have medical issues and have taken many tablets that aren't compatible with having a healthy baby so I'm fully prepared for an Abortion.

I called them today and they said they will ring me back in 5 working days. I'm NT so assume it'll be the Causeway. Which is hell as my whole family are going up to the caravan for weeks there (mum, dad, sister, nephews, son) and apart from my husband I don't want anyone else to know.

How am I going to have a medical Abortion in a tin hut filled with people?

Or am I so far along I'll need a surgical one....would that be easier to hide?

Plus I keep reading about the complications of becoming pregnant after an ablation, ectopic, placental/utrine rupture that I'm now just shit scared

I'm so glad we have Abortion here now. It makes this slightly less awful.

Hi
I'm sorry you're going through this, but glad you have your husbands support.
I think first, you need to have some idea of how far along you are, as that will be a factor in whether it's medical or surgical. I knew how far I was, but when I went in for surgical the first thing they did was a dating scan. So there's a chance they'll do that.
I would hold off on doing it if you're going to be in a caravan with extended family. You'll need your space... But you'll know more once you get talking to them. I agree, where would we be if we still didn't have the option.
Come back here as much as you need x

@GladWeNowHaveChoices thanks for responding

Do you get a scan appointment or is it all in one day?

I think I'm just very nervous as I've no idea about dates.

Surgical seems best for you. You should be aware that you will bleed a bit after but you could tell family it's period.

You could consider getting a private scan this week to find out how far along you are. Costs around £90.

I'd contact the team that did the tubes tying. Make sure they know this is an urgent problem and you want to speak to a doctor. Badger them until you get an appointment.

Wishing you all the best x

@Watermelonistheanswertoallthings I had 2 appts. They did scan at the first, confirmed dates gave me the tablet, and procedure was 2 days later.

Surgical was probably easier to deal with afterwards. As @ClickClickety says, there'll be a bit of bleeding but very manageable. I went to bed for the rest of the day when I went home, and then was up and about the next day.

No matter what, I'd probably prefer my own space than with the family though. It was an emotional time x

Ps wish they would tie my tubes. 3 year waiting list, while they told me in clinic it would be 6 weeks

Yes I was told 18 weeks for the ablation and tube tying and it was over 3 years.....for all the good it's done me lol. Apparently there is a 1 in 50,000 chance of ending up pregnant after both procedures .....yayee me!

I got a call yesterday and was meant to go for a scan today, then it was suggested as it so rare and I'm quite far from Coleraine that I get a blood test to 100% confirm but my GP is refusing to do the blood test, i coukd rant forever about how shit my GP is... though i think this is the boot in the arse I need to make me move from the practice. So I'm back waiting for Coleraine call me back.
I could have had the scan over and done with my now.

Well that GP is more than useless 🙄🙄🙄

Did they get back to you? We're southern trust so I've no experience with Coleraine. But given the risks you'd think they'd have a bit more urgency about them all.

Chin up, you will get sorted soon x

Currently in a&e for the last 20hrs as GP refused to do the bloods. Coleraine phoned on Monday (today) said I should wait a week and retest.

GP then decided to test today and had another positive and then panicked and sent me here as I have some pain on my right side.

Arrived and had a negative urine here. So waiting to hear what the blood test says????

All very odd....

Any more word now @Watermelonistheanswertoallthings?
That is wild. The hospitals have gone to pot. But I'm hoping that at this stage you have some answers x

Hiya.. I need some advice.. I’m southern trust.. I put in a request for call back today regarding a abortion 🙈🙈🙈 how long do you think it’ll take for them to get back to me

@GladWeNowHaveChoices I'm due for my procedure on Friday, is the pain manageable while having it done.

Hi @Babyghirl
Yes, it's totally manageable. I had thought I wanted to be knocked out, but it isn't necessary.

It's getting a little hazy now (thankfully) but from memory they inject local anesthetic, and thats possibly the sorest part. After that it's like period pain.

Good luck 💗

Thank you very much for your reply, it has eased my mind somewhat for it on Friday. ❤️

I won't lie, it's possibly the hardest thing I've ever done. Take all the support offered after the procedure. I did counselling and don't think I'd have got through without it. And go easy on yourself.
Take care x

Thank you, it's 💯 the right decision for me, so hoping it makes it somewhat abit easier, I don't want the baby grown up with me resenting it cause I didn't want it, I had a tough time trying for my now 2 year old 4 miscarriages and I happy with just her.

Thank you, it's 💯 the right decision for me, so hoping it makes it somewhat abit easier, I don't want the baby grown up with me resenting it cause I didn't want it, I had a tough time trying for my now 2 year old 4 miscarriages and I happy with just her.