Medical booked.. worried about the pain :(

[Turkeytwizzlerz]

Booked my medical for 3rd January. I’m currently 8w 6d (roughly - still breastfeeding so periods all over the shop). By the time I get to take the pill, I’ll be right at the latter end of the window. I’ve given birth twice but still never been as worried as I am about taking this pill and the pain of passing this pregnancy. Does anyone have any information/stories from their own experiences regarding medical abortions at the near cut off point?

I’m going in for a scan first, so I guess they wouldn’t let me go over the window but I’m still going to be pretty close I think. 😣

Hi @Turkeytwizzlerz, I can’t offer any advice but just to hand hold and say I’m in the same position as you. Waiting for my phone appointment Tuesday and absolutely petrified of the pain. I don’t labour very well and I’ve also had a TMFR at 17 weeks and it was horrific. I am also 8 weeks so will probably going into 9 weeks by the time I get the tablets so I’m worried it’s going to be worse with being further on?

Yeah very worrying isn’t it? All they could tell me is that people take to it differently so couldn’t exactly confirm or dispel 😔 I hope your telephone appointment goes well ❤️❤️ Let me know! And I’ll keep you posted as I imagine I’ll be taking the tablets before you so can tell you what to expect x

Hi @Turkeytwizzlerz I don't have any advice either but I just wanted to let you know I am here for a handhold and I am too absolutely petrified,
I have children already from ages almost 15 to 3, right now this isn't the best time for a pregnancy and my partner is beside himself he really wanted this but understands my reasons and although he is showing support I know its hurting him,
I had my telephone consultation with bpas this morning and I need to go in for a finger prick blood test as I am generally low in iron when pregnant, and collect my tablets on Friday 6th January, I am currently 7 weeks
I have had spotting on and off with some cramps over the last week that the hospital wasn't phased by but it wasn't normal for me, so i had a private scan last night and it was incredibly painful to see a baby, but this was just for my own mind that it wasn't ectopic. I did however have a under 2cm hematoma which was causing the spotting.
I know the medical abortion is the right thing for me to do but the whole process of it is killing me, I just want it over with and I have a week of waiting just to pick up my pills,
I have given birth multiple times but I am just dreading this so much.

@Difficultime ☹️ I’m so sorry. It’s really shit isn’t it? I don’t know about you but I always knew we weren’t ready for a 3rd and unsure if we ever would be, but I would always think “if the worst happened then at least I can, and will, exercise my right to a termination”. But yeah, the worst happened and now I’ve just found myself in this little “what if?” Bubble. My other half is amazing but I think a third would just tip him over the edge. Our youngest has just turned one, eldest about to turn 3 - there’s chaos everywhere already. I feel like once I’ve just left a stage with my eldest, we enter it with my youngest so I just couldn’t do that a third time in such quick succession. We have no space, I’ve literally just started 5 year education to go into my dream career, it just isn’t suitable or fair to bring a baby into this but even so my head is like aghhh maybe you could?? But yeah like you, I know deep deep down this is absolutely the best decision. Doesn’t make it any easier right? especially feeling your body changing. I have absolutely 0 motivation and energy, so the only plus is that I look forward to going back to myself and getting some oomph back afterwards.

How did you feel post-scan? Mine is on Tuesday and honestly, it sounds stupid but I almost want to see it and can feel myself asking them to show me, because I feel like I just owe it that bit of respect, yano? Aghhh. What a rollercoaster! ❤️

@Turkeytwizzlerz I felt awful after the scan, I got given 2 bags with freebies, its not the companies fault I was a happy expectant mum to them, I feel tremendously guilty and my emotions are everywhere, I gave my scan report to bpas and the nurse called me this morning and she is sending me the pack in the post which will arrive tomorrow or Tuesday, I'm great full this has been pushed forward a little bit as the thought of another week of waiting was awful. My partner keeps asking if I'm OK and I'm not but he doesn't understand why I'm really upset with it as its my decision to go ahead with the termination, I have too gone through the what ifs, could I cope with another child. Realistically yes I could but I have a almost 5 year old who is on the spectrum and non verbal and I don't think he would deal with it, he just about tolerates his younger sister at the best of times, the decision I'm making is based off what's best for my other children and I guess this is why it hurts more.
I'm with you on the 0 motivation! I can't do anything for feeling sick.
How are you feeling today?

@Difficultime hey, sorry I’ve been MIA. I guess I’ve just been trying to avoid it mentally, but my appointment is today 😔 how have you been getting on? Did you get the pills? X

@Turkeytwizzlerz
Hi no need to apologise! My pills should have arrived Saturday and the nurse had said that if I'm not in royal mail will just post them throigh the letter box but they didn't and they left a red card so I'm having to wait till Wednesday which I found very frustrating really I don't like the waiting around,
Other than that I'm okay! I know its not 100% the decision I want but I'm 100% certain it's the right thing to do at this moment in my life.
How have you been doing?
I hope your appointment goes well they really are so nice and understanding

@Difficultime I took the first pill today. They were really friendly and we actually had a bit of a laugh in the appointment. Sounds odd but it’s as depressing as you make it, I didn’t want to wallow. There were 3 of them - midwife, student and sonographer. They determined that I am 9 weeks + 1, and she did ask before telling me whether I wanted to know. I said yes and that I’d also like to see it if possible. I know it sounds ridiculous but morally it just felt wrong to completely turn a blind eye. I felt like I owed it some level of respect even though it’ll never know, yano?? So anyways they let me have a scan photo and yeah - first tablet done. The final 4 (2 back ups) to be taken 24 hours after. i did leave with the idea of coming back in 3 weeks to get the coil but my Partner had already been on the phone to the GP to arrange a potential vasectomy. I’d love a third but equally, I’d love to stick with 2 so a vasectomy (although very final) is something I’d happily accept. It really takes away the potential of this happening again and I’d be absolutely fine sticking with 2. Means I don’t have to worry about a coil.

anyways, so yeah! That’s that I guess 🤷🏻‍♀️ I did get a bit teary on the journey home. It felt odd that there was a little moving baby on the screen with a flickering heartbeat an hour ago and now any moment from now I was stopping said heartbeat with the tablet 😔 but it was and still is the best decision for us as a family.

sorry for the novel!! Massively offloading here. I hope you get everything you need in the post tomorrow and that there’s no more delays 😩 🤞🏻

@Turkeytwizzlerz hey, offload as much as you need to! You did extremely well yesterday, I can completely understand the respect thing as I too kept a picture of the scan, I didn't particularly want to but felt that I needed/had to.
I'll be taking my first pill tomorrow evening I am planning it so that my youngest 2 are at their dad's Friday to Sunday so I was hoping if I take the second lot Friday I can hopefully be over the worst by the time they are home.
I wish you all the best today in taking your second lot and I'm here if you need a chat

@Turkeytwizzlerz how are you doing today?

@Difficultime took the final 4 today at midday, with an extra 2 in the mouth at 3pm and it began almost immediately after the last 2. Very painful to begin with and bled through some trousers suddenly, but it’s died down to waves now. Hopefully I’m over the worst. I do get sudden “gushes” and there have been a few clots but I’ve not inspected them closely to know if it has actually passed or not. I’m just worried about bleeding too much which they said would be 2 pads in an hour. Thankfully my partner is a paramedic so that helps me feel a little bit at ease. You doing ok? X

@Turkeytwizzlerz I'm glad it's eased up a little now, it sounds like you might be over the worst of it, I've read the pain does become less once the pregnancy has passed, I relieved my pills today and I was planning on starting the first tomorrow evening, next lot Friday evening once I've dropped my youngest 2 off with their dad, but I'm worried that I'll end up awake all night so I think my better option is to take them Friday and Saturday morning. I don't think I'd be able to sleep for worrying about how much I'd be bleeding

@Difficultime yeah, it’s hard to plan them when you have children around so I think youre making a smart move by choosing to take them sans kids. I’m with you in spirit! I’d definitely recommend maternity pads if you have them or can get them. I think the pregnancy has definitely passed now, thank god. I was a bit worried being over 9 weeks but hopefully it’s less clots now and just more period-like. I couldn’t take it as I’m breastfeeding still (another guilt of mine - they said it’s passed through milk so I could continue but to know it could make my youngest ill. he’s such a boob monster and doesn’t take lightly to being refused it so had to keep feeding him 😔 thankfully no signs of illness yet though!) but they did say codeine could be taken. Just stock up, get yourself in front of Netflix and a heated blanket on the go 🫶🏻 (I absolutely smashed a fresh tub of b&j’s chocolate brownie earlier - 0 regrets 😂)

Hi @Turkeytwizzlerz, I know exactly what you mean. I’m first tablet down, they arrived through the post yesterday and it was so hard taking that first one. It goes against everything I believe in but I know it was the right thing to do.
Hoping to take the 4 this afternoon. I’m so scared of the pain. Did you take the codine? I’ve got codine, paracetamol and ibuprofen at the ready.

@Coi123 I hope today goes okay for you, I got the codine too. Are we able to take codine, paracetamol and ibuprofen all at the same time or does it need to be spaced out? I'm taking my first tablet this evening and I'll be taking the rest either tomorrow night or Saturday morning

@Turkeytwizzlerz @Coi123 Hey! So sorry you’re going through this too. It’s an absolute rollercoaster isn’t it?? I genuinely used to think that this would be the “easiest” option if we found ourselves in a mess like this 🙃 I hope you can make peace with your decision soon. Sometimes the best things happen at the most in opportune times.

no I didn’t have codeine, I didn’t explain it clearly above. I think my head was just all over the place when o wrote it 😬 but basically I’m breastfeeding my youngest still so I can’t have codeine (thats whag I was told anyway). So I just had paracetamol and ibuprofen. Xx

Sorry - tagged myself and not you @Difficultime 🤦🏻‍♀️😂

I've took mifepristone at 4.30. Really nervous about taking the rest tomorrow night or Saturday morning, have had a shower. Just feel a bit numb, but I am glad that I didn't chicken out at the last minute because I'm so panicked about what's going to happen

@Turkeytwizzlerz that's OK! You've had alot to deal with so totally understand

@Difficultime 😔🫶🏻❤️ Sending love. Can totally relate, the first isn’t easy mentally. If it’s any consolation, pain wise I was over the worst of it before I went to sleep last night. Pain only really started after I took the final 2 tablets at about 3 yesterday, so just a couple of hours of pain waves then all good to go to bed and I was 9 weeks so hopefully at 7 weeks you won’t have anything more than that. Take it easy. It’s so difficult but remind yourself of why you did this. X

@Difficultime just reread that last sentence and it sounds awful!! I meant as in, as awful as it makes us feel we chose this route because it was right for us/our families so try remember that and not get bogged down with guilt x

Hi ladies. I took the 4 tablets at 1.30 today along with ibuprofen and paracetamol. Started to bleed around 2 hours after then it because quite painful but I took the codine and managed ok. The cramping pain seems to have gone now so I think I’m over the worst of it. It was painful and uncomfortable but so much less than I was expecting (and I have the lowest pain threshold!). I’ve passed something but it didn’t feel big, is that normal? And did you all take 4 tablets or 6? I thought you only took the last 2 if you hadn’t started bleeding. I’ve rang the hotline but there is no answer.

@Coi123 I'm glad it's not been too bad for you, in my pack it just states to take the last 2 orally, so I would think to take them anyway just incase any bits remain, I hope your doing okay! I'll be inserting the 4 tomorrow around 7pm ish.
@Shoesarered thank-you! We go through this for the right reasons and it is hard to not feel guilty

Thank you @Difficultime. I did end up taking the last two orally. I am so relieved it’s over although worried I didn’t pass enough. Good luck @Difficultime, I have the worst pain threshold, my TMFR was horrific and my induced labour with my son was also horrific so I was absolutely terrified of this. It was very uncomfortable at times but honestly nothing like I expected. Good luck 💖

Thank-you @Coi123 I wish you the very best in healing!
I felt a light gush about an hour ago and rushed to the loo and it just looked like a little clear water in my pants and I have started spotting when I wiped, had backache today. No idea if I should be inserting the first 4 later if I'm lightly bleeding already