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Pregnancy choices

This topic is for sharing experiences of pregnancy choices; to debate the ethics of termination, visit our Politics or Chat forums.

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Original poster

Antenatal support thread for women who have chosen to terminate 7

863 replies

mrsbigz · 14/05/2011 22:54

May this thread continue to offer support and friendship to all who have found ourselves knocking at its door. May the door stay firmly wedged open - to be a comfort to those who have recently lost a little one, and welcoming back those who have longer memories of their loss. May the tea always be brewing and the millionaire shortbreads always freshly baked.

And may our all little ones find each other in a magical place, where they can run, laugh and play together with no boundaries

OP posts:
blacktreaclecat · 06/09/2011 21:23

Great news mrs b
Starting ivf next month- nervous but excited. We are using array cgh so if it does work at least we will be a bit less worried about repeat t21.
Hi to all xx

flower11 · 07/09/2011 02:15

Mrsb great news, glad it went well for you x

Endo sorry you are having a hard time with sil, re ttc probably best to start when you feel ready to . Though I think there is a difference between being physically ready and emotionaly ready. That said I started ttc as soon as I could as it was my way of coping, given that its taking so long, probably a good thing.

Misty glad that you had a good holiday. It has gone very autumnal now.

We have got our consultant appointment through for oct 17th at sub fertility clinic (great name) really hits home.

Hi to everyone else xx

blacktreaclecat · 07/09/2011 06:48

Good news flower, it really helps when moving forward with treatment. I've felt much happier and less out of control since we decided on ivf.
Endogirl and lily- how are you both doing?
Xx

misty0 · 07/09/2011 08:34

blacktreacle ! .... flower ! Hello ladies! Grin

I love an update. 'Specially when its good news. Things are really moving on for both of you Smile everything crossed for you. Yeah, that name isnt the most inspiring for the clinic is it flower Hmm

Yep - summer (for what it was worth) does seem to have left the building now. Yesterday was WILD here, and cold, and half the leaves have been blown off the trees (together with alot of branches) around the village so it looks like the end of Oct already. I saw the first Halloween bits in town yesterday already. Goodness!

Usually my emotions tend to take a bit of a dive when it starts getting dingy and grey out - but somehow this year i'm enjoying the fact that i can bung the heating on, draw the curtains after tea, light some nice candles and generally cozy up in the house Grin This summer hasnt been worth the effort.

at cremegg and fingers crossed there too. Really hope the witch stays away for you xx I've just ov'd (i think) so i've done my bit this month. I can chill for a while.

stunned - are you still reading? Are you ok?

to everyone else. Hope everyone is enjoying their week and is finding life is treating them well.

Love to all xxx

MyangelAva · 07/09/2011 19:51

Hello girls, a very quick one before I make myself some dinner- am starving! Sorry to have been AWOL and will catch up with you all soon, I promise! Went to the FMC again today for 20 week scan and all looking fine and healthy. We are expecting another baby girl and I feel a bit optimistic for the first time since last Dec I think! Still feel like I'm not out of the woods (think I've realised you never are!) but still, hopefully I can admit to myself I'm pregnant again now and start to relax a tiny bit!

Just wanted to say congrats to mrsbigz and to flower and blacktreaclecat- a bit of positive taking you all forward I hope!

Also hi to Egglet and cremegg and misty et al! Oh, and to the newbies- I'm sorry I've been so rude! The last few weeks (leading up to these anomaly scans have been very difficult for me- I terminated at 26 weeks in Jan for T18)

Also wanted to add that I waited for my first period before ttc and ignored the whole 6 month thing! Interestingly the FMC form asked whether your last pregnancy had been within 3 months of the current one that they were examining. Not sure why. As it happened it took me 3 cycles before I conceived anyway.

Anyway, hope to catch up soon although away on hols again fairly soon! Take care xx

Original poster
mrsbigz · 07/09/2011 20:50

just posted this on the sister thread but wanted to quickly share with you ladies too (if you don't mind);

"hi i'm sorry have had a very rollercoaster day today...it was Eve's due date, plus the 30th anniversary of my dads death, so all in all i've been pretty much an emotional wreck. just wanted to update you that my consultant rang this evening (at 7:30pm!!) with my bloods results to give me my combined risk....

T21 ~ 1:1,669 (this was including my increased risk from Eve). Apparently this on age alone was 1:83!)
T18 ~ 1:7,800
T13 ~ 1:24,800

!!!!!!!!! :D :D :D :D

I can't quite find the words to describe just how relieved i'm feeling at the moment! Not quite secure enough yet to be telling all and sundry, BUT definitely not having CVS now, and will wait and see how i'm feeling around amnio time.

Sorry this is all very much me me me - i'm shattered, have red blubby eyes and need to go to bed soon"

OP posts:
gillianread · 07/09/2011 23:50

well done mrs big, after my good bloods i didnt have a cvs and at my 20 week scan on my lost baby reads due date, everything was great, only thing was that its number 3 boy lol, i am so sure that the nub on baby read was a girl, still trying to find out.

misty0 · 08/09/2011 08:03

YAY mrsB !

Fab, fab, fab! Now get some bloomin rest! lol. I know you're at work today, but please take it easy?

xxx

blacktreaclecat · 09/09/2011 07:13

Right will be AWOL for a bit, off to California for a couple of weeks. When I come back due date will have passed. Time to look forward and hope and pray the ivf works first time.
Xx

cremegg · 09/09/2011 09:07

boooo the red witch arrived :o( All that effort!?!
but yayyyy it's friday!

have a great trip treacle and fingers crossed for IVF on your return xx

must go find some friday Wine

xxx

cremegg · 09/09/2011 09:10

what the heck happened to the sad face ?! :( did not put a grin in there!

misty0 · 09/09/2011 09:37

Lol cremegg ! Sorry, but i thought you were being very upbeat there and was admiring your 'Grin'

Boo hiss to blasted Autie Flo. Buy i'll join you in yay for Friday! Sadly off the Wine for now, (bit all or nothing for OH and i, so we're doing the nothing for a few months .... ) but will have a Brew instead Grin

blacktreacle has a wonderful holiday hun! Sounds fabulous.

xxx

misty0 · 09/09/2011 09:41

what is with my typing today?

but + have Hmm

Original poster
mrsbigz · 09/09/2011 10:28

Cremegg was also just going to comment how upbeat you were with your grin!? Sorry Auntie Flo found you but huge YAYs for Friday and wine!!

Blacktreacle hope you have a lovely holiday in California, sounds amazing - and somewhere completely out of the norm to be spending your due date, which you may find helps a little? Have everything crossed for your IVF when you return xx

Misty - you sure you've not been on the wine Wink hope you're ok this morning and got a lovely weekend planned!

to everyone else - hope that you are all doing ok. I'm still coughing and spluttering everywhere, drinking gallons of honey and lemon to no avail - hoping to improve my health (and subsequently my temprement) for the weekend, otherwise i'll be no fun for the boys to be around!

Working from home today so at least i'm not annoying half of the office with my constant barking!!!

speak soon xxxxxxx

OP posts:
Endogirl · 14/09/2011 23:33

Hi ladies. Haven't been on here for a little bit but thought I'd pop in and say hi.

mrsbigz hope you've conquered your cold now and are feeling better.

Am very jealous of treacle on her California trip. Where has the summer gone here??? I think I blinked and missed it!!!

lily are you still here? How are you doing?

Hope everyone else is ok.

Things here are going ok. We had Cora's funeral last Thursday and I feel better and a bit more able to move on now that's over. My DH is now on a boys golfing holiday and I will admit I was petrified about being parted from him but I'm actually glad to have some time part!! I've managed to avoid the pg SIL so far too! They fly home on 23rd though so I am going to try and be brave and see her before she goes.

Love to all. xxxxxx

Endogirl · 18/09/2011 18:19

Hi all. I hope you've all had a nice weekend.

I've had a bit of a weepy day as af (as I think you all call it!) arrived this morning. I know it should be a positive thing as it means everything is getting back to normal but I sort of feel like it's a bit of a slap in the face! Everything seems so final now with the pregnancy and although I know it's all over this seems to have brought reality crashing down again.

Did anyone else feel like this or am I being over emotional?? It's probably hormones as well but I'm finding it really hard to cope with.

Sorry for the "me" post.

xxxxxx

cremegg · 19/09/2011 01:44

Hey endo it's another stage that confirms you're not on the path you once were, I'm sorry it's making you feel down but it's part of the process so don't be too hard on yourself. We waited before the first af before trying again, so I was obsessed with the idea that once that was out the way we could ttc. But now hate it arriving as it means we didn't crack it! Go easy on yourself, have a treat of some kind!
xxx

misty0 · 19/09/2011 07:06

Hi Endo xx And cremegg!

Sorry your feeling low Sad

Yes - the first AF (Auntie Flo) is always a bit of a mixed blessing emotionaly. On the one hand it does signal that our bodys are up an running and are getting on with life just like like before - and that we're clear to go again - BUT it is the biggest reminder that we've gone back to square one, and what we've lost..... A slap in the face describes the feeling very well!

Just started spotting myself yesterday - so, along with the PMT i'm not a very happy bunny today Hmm I'm always much more cheerfull when AF gets underway peroperly and i can count day 1 again.

Hugs and waves to all, of course xxxxx

Endogirl · 19/09/2011 11:28

Thanks Cremegg and misty. I guess you're right that it is a good thing that it's arrived as it does mean everything is back to normal.

Not too sure i'm ready to start trying again yet. I thought I would be raring to go again but I'm too scared to even get down to business! I'm hoping that will pass soon! My DH also wants to wait a bit and maybe go somewhere special over Cora's due date (24th Jan) and then start afresh after that. I'm not sure I want to wait that long but it does sort of sound sensible. However I'm sure the age panic will kick in when I turn 37 in December!!!

misty I'm sorry AF is arriving for you too. Have lots chocolate treats to help. I'm taking cremegg's advice on that one!! Hope you feel a bit brighter soon.

xxxxxx

EggletinaClock · 19/09/2011 13:51

Hi Endo, I try to tell myself it's a good sign but what I actually find most distressing is that the pain I get now before and during my period is identical to the pain I felt during the termination. I didn't have pains like that before with periods so it now feels like a particularly cruel addition. Full of PMT here too, not good for my already ropey mental state.
x

Endogirl · 19/09/2011 23:05

Oh egglet you poor thing that must be horrible. Have you spoken to your GP or anyone about it? Surely that can't be right? I hope the PMT passes soon. Chocolate, chocolate, chocolate........oh and wine! Tons of hugs xxxxx

blacktreaclecat · 03/10/2011 18:16

Where is everyone? How is everyone?
Start stimming for my ivf today- any vibes gratefully received.

Endogirl · 03/10/2011 22:33

Hi treacle. Welcome back. How was your trip to California? Are you all nicely rested and ready to start your IVF?

Is stimming the injections? Sorry I'm a bit clueless with IVF. I'm sending you lots of lovely good vibes anyway :) How long do you do these for and what's the next stage?

Hi to everyone else. It has been quiet recently so I hope everyone is ok.

xxxxx

cremegg · 05/10/2011 00:14

Hey treacle how was your trip? Sending lots of good vibes to you (maybe a tad late!) How's it going so far?
Hey endo how r u?
I've been camping in the outback for the last few days, good to get away, nice and warm but not crazy hot there yet! On school hols now for a week an a half now :D
How's everyone else doing??
xxx

misty0 · 05/10/2011 07:10

Hi ladies x

Yep - good vibes to you treacle, keep us updated. I too am fairly clueless to the details of IVF, but am happy to learn!

Hi endo and cremegge. Nice to 'see' you Smile

endo you must be well over AF now and well into your mid cycle. Hows everything with you?

cremegg its been HOT here for a few days, warmer than in the summer! All gone back to grey damp Autumn now though.

Not alot to report here. Big strong OPK yesterday, and LOADS of cramps on my left side during the day and night. Pretty painful actualy. Not too thrilled - never had this before at ov time. Hope its not a sign of anything awful ....

Love and hugs to everyone, how are you all?

xxx