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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

feeling really low...convinced baby is dead :-(

105 replies

Nemo1977 · 02/06/2005 22:30

hi all
i need to get this out cos my head is done in.
I am supposed to be 12wks tommorow but dont have another scan till 9th august. I had a scan at 8wks to check viability and they saw a heartbeat.
I just feel really bad at the min. I have had 3mcs in past and last was a missed mc where baby died at around 9wks. I dont know why i think baby is gone but i just feel it is. I am sitting here crying and getting stressed as i know there is nothing i can do. I am due to see mw again on tues but prob wont be able to hear hb with doppler as with ds i was 16wks before i could hear it.
I was feeling really sick etc until about 4 days ago. Everything has just stopped which i know can happen around now anyway but it isnt helping...i just dont know what to do my head is messed up. sorry for moaning but i just feel so lost

OP posts:
aloha · 03/06/2005 10:02

Yes, invent a bit of blood if you have to.

handlemecarefully · 03/06/2005 10:04

Absolutely - do what you have to do!

MINNIE1 · 03/06/2005 10:28

Nemo,
Sorry your feeling like this, were all here for you. Did you get to use your friends doppler??

Enid · 03/06/2005 10:34

we don't have a right to a scan before 20 weeks here.

having said that, my symptoms suddenly stopped at 12 weeks with dd2 and I dissolved into tears on the phone to the EPU and they scanned me that day . I had previously had one miscarriage.

and every thing was fine

and I have to say...although it may not be what you want to hear...I hope the info about the hearbeat is correct but it didn't work like that for me and I couldn't bear to pretend that seeing a heartbeat at an early scan is a surefire sign that everything will be ok...sorry.

I really hope everything is OK.

beansprout · 03/06/2005 10:38

Best wishes to you Nemo. hope everything is ok xx

Original poster
Nemo1977 · 03/06/2005 10:39

hi all thanks for messages.
havent contacted hospital basically because dh is in work on a 8-8 and the same on mon so will just have to wait until tues. wont make a difference if baby is dead anyway cos last tiem they made me wait 2wks for rescan and all that crap.

OP posts:
Enid · 03/06/2005 10:40

why do you need dh?

can you get a taxi there if they can see you today?

can't you at least ring and make an appt for next week?

handlemecarefully · 03/06/2005 11:32

Yes c'mon Nemo - at least ring, it might help to be doing something

trefusis · 03/06/2005 12:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Trix1 · 03/06/2005 14:06

Nemo, Why are you considering waiting until next week to put your mind at ease. Go to the hospital NOW surely you can go on your own or bringa friend you do not need dh. You cannot wait until next week - go now.

beansontoast · 03/06/2005 14:15

xxx hang in there nemo xx

tamum · 03/06/2005 14:27

Nemo, if you really can't get to the hospital why not do another pregnancy test? As aloha says, if there was a heartbeat that's a really good sign, and if the test is still positive then put together with the heartbeat I would have thought that would be quite reassuring. Do try and get a scan if you can though.
xxx

george32 · 03/06/2005 17:55

Hi Nemo,
Wondering if you had any news, if you managed to call the hospital or doctors today? I know its hard, as the last thing you probably feel like doing is having battle with someone to get a scan, but it will so be worth it when you see your bean waving at you and asking what all the fuss is about.
I do hope you are feeling a bit better & more positive this afternoon.
I wish you lived further south & I'd come round, put you in the car, & take you to where I'm getting my scans done.
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

bunny2 · 03/06/2005 20:34

Nemo, any news?

Original poster
Nemo1977 · 03/06/2005 21:05

hi all
feeling a little better as found babys heartbeat with doppler...sorry mears i know u said not to
so feeling a lot relieved although had a tiny bit of spotting tonight,nothing major at all just couple of drops really...so will just mention to mw on tues as it is that insignificant

OP posts:
Evesmama · 03/06/2005 21:33

Nemo, does your hospital not have a maternity day unit??..james cook hospital where i had dd were wonderful(well, expect the two who helped me push dd out!)i was in and out literally every couple of weeks with normal anxiety..thinking i couldnt feel her move or feeling ill and limbs swelling..each time they put me into a private room, got me to do a water sample, gave me a cup of tea and strapped me up to monitor..to be greeted 9 times out of 10 by dd's hicc ups(must have been the sugary tes)...they told me if i was ever concerned, thats what there were there for and to go in anytime...only in retrospect to i realise just how wonderful they were if no one else has access to this care!

worth ringing them to find out, your midwife should have told you, but she doesnt seem very nice tho...kep bopping away to the beat on that dopler

Original poster
Nemo1977 · 03/06/2005 21:35

evesmama my normal community mw is fab its not her its the hospital. they have changed all their policies since i had ds dont know if they have cut budgets or what but everything is very limited

OP posts:
Evesmama · 03/06/2005 21:40

is that the only hospital you can go to?..it was for me as the little one in guisborough i wanted to go to was underfunded and closed for a while just before i was due...
they should be taking your pregnancy more seriously..my SIL has had 5 misscarrages and with her two children has been on very strict watch...such a shame that at this wonderful time in your life theres no preffesional body to help ease the worry for you

Papillon · 04/06/2005 07:13

Hi Nemo
Glad you found the babies heartbeat I saw my midwife two weeks ago and she used her doppler. She was my mw in the 1st pregnancy and she seems to have no problems locating the heartbeat. I did see the support mw once and she had problems initially finding the heartbeat and that was at 30 weeks or so ! Which was initially a little unsettling - Everyone has a different touch I guess.

I have been having some old blood, its like I am having a wee period every month.

I sympathise with the feelings about the baby, I had the same thoughts earlier in the week wondering if it is alive - it is, but doesn´t stop me from experiencing these emotions!

Take care and all the best, Paps

spangles · 04/06/2005 08:11

Nemo1977
I can't believe that with your history you havent been refered to a consultant and given scans every 2 weeks. It beggars belief that you are being left this long between scans when you have had 3 mcs, one of them a missed mc at 9 wks. I would have a word with mw and see what she says. Good luck

Xena · 06/06/2005 15:24

How are you doing Nemo?

MamaMaiasaura · 06/06/2005 16:30

Hi Nemo, havent spoken to you before but saw your thread and just wanted to say i really really hope everything goes well for you. x

Xena · 06/06/2005 18:12

Bump.

Original poster
Nemo1977 · 06/06/2005 18:14

thanks awen

i am seeing mw tommorow so will see what happens from there although i have been a lot more relaxed since finding heartbeat on fri...stupid thing is i know the mw wouldnt try that as mears said it can cause stress but im my cause it has caused much needed relief

OP posts:
lunavix · 06/06/2005 18:24

Nemo - can you change hospital?

I had three miscarriages before I was pg with ds, and like you I panicked just about every day that I couldn't feel him (although I was lucky enough in not finding out till I was about 13 weeks which I thought was a blessing.)

Fortunately my local hospital had a drop in for an hour every morning where you could go and hear the heartbeat if you were panicking. I was there most lunchtimes

It sounds like this would do you the world of good...

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