Urgent

[Tumi]

When a baby is conceived on the 30 of August when will the due date of the birth be? i am really looking for an urgent answer please, my boyfriend slept with another girl on the 30th August and now she says she is pregnant and does not know who the baby daddy is but she is giving birth this april ... how possible is it my boyfriends? he is very traumatised and when i call her she laughs, we had a fight and thats when he slept with her. Thing is if the baby is his then i wont be able to be with him as its his first child and i dont even have a baby yet, i wont be able to stand the hurt.

Please help ...

Do you mean she went in for induction on the 2nd May and was sent home (as sometimes happens if they are too busy). If so she is probably 2 weeks overdue, tying in pretty well exactly with what you originally thought.

Nekabu i dont know how to thank you for what you just said, i just cant mention how greatful i am coz this is taking up my mind most of the time. I deserve better and i will be better, next time i right here it will only be good news.I am going to win physically and emotionally.

Shellmc i am 3 months now and its harder and harder everytime for me ...

Tumi, make yourself put this out of your mind. You can achieve absolutely nothing by worrying about this other than upsetting yourself and your bf. Will you worrying change the date this wretched female gives birth? No. Will it stop her winding you up? No. Will it change the dna of her baby? No.

Each and every time you think about this, briefly remind yourself it is almost certainly her bf's baby (that's what my money's on) and after you have briefly reminded yourself of that, think "I'm not going to think about this any more." and go and do something else. Read a book of baby names. Go and cook something. Start making a list of what you'll need for your baby and have a look on the internet to see if there are reviews for any of the things you want. Each and every time you find yourself thinking about her, think "No; not playing." and force yourself to do something else.

I conceived ds around the 15th August (LMP 31 July) and gave birth to him on 26 April (39 weeks and 6 days so almost exactly on due date). If she says she conceived on 30th August her due date will be mid-May at the absolute earliest. If she gives birth before that, either the baby has arrived prematurely, or your boyfriend is not the father. I would put money on her own bf being the father.

Congratulations on your own pg

Today is a different day for me, i woke up feeling on top of the world and for the first time i actually thanked God for the baby i have inside of me. It is such a blessing to me because i am healthy and so is my baby, my bf is always on my side and runs around for me when i have those silly cravings

It feels great to be back in control of my life again, thank you to everyone for all the encouragement and help. I will update as soon as everything is back on track.

Thanks again!!!

That is great news! You carry on and enjoy your pregnancy!

Thanks Nekabu, i will deffinately do that!!!

I know you all are pribably getting tired of me, but i have no one to pour out what i am feeling as my boyfriend already is not doing well with this conversation.

This girl has not gotten the baby yet and it is the 25th today, if it is my boyfriends then she would have had it on the 23rd. Now this makes me more scared coz she even passed the 23rd which makes it more that it could be my boyfriends. I cant sleep or even eat just thinking about this whole thing every day and night.

It is affecting me to a point that i get cramps every night i sleep.

What am i going to do

Ohh hun, please try not to stress its not gud for u or the baby u are carrying.

I personally knew i ovulated on the 28th august and my due date was 21st may iv actually gone over my due date now.

Is there anyway of getting dna testing dun?? wen did ur bf and this girl sleep together??

xxxxx

They slept together on the 30th of August but to what i was told she was suppose to get her baby on the 30th - 5th of may. The thing that worries me is that she is overdue and now it ties up with the time she slept with my boyfriend.

We can get dna testing when the baby is born but it is taking time

Im soo sorry ur in this posistion and i cant evan begin to try and feel wot ur feeling.
Buit untill baby is ere i suppose its just a matter ov sitting and holding tight.
What will happen if ur bf is the babys father?? av u talked about this?? as now ur pregnant ur gonna need his support.
xxxxx

Tumi....try to concentrate on yourself and your lo, thinking of you. x

Yes we have talked about it and he clearly told me that he does not want to be her, he did what he did out of anger and look what it has done to us now. We are happy about out pregnancy but cant really enjoy it much since we are having a tough time, he says it its his child then he wont run away from his responsibility but he does not want to be with her. It will be easy for him but what about "ME" how am i going to handle my baby and that womans???

mrsdisorganised i will do my best to keep calm

Im pleased u av talked.

I really cant suggest anything or dont know wots the right thing to say to try and help u.
I feel for u, i really do hope itl all work out for u both and i hope u can start and enjoy ur own pregnancy once u know for sure about this girls baby.
I know it will be hard for u if he is the father but u can make it work, my husband had a wee boy wen we first met he was 3 and i didnt think it wud work coz i kept thinking to myself well he already has a child and its not with me. But iv grown to love this child and after all its not the childs fault, it didnt ask for this mess, ur bf cud still pay a part in the childs life (if its his) and u also, u also have a wonderful thing coming that is part ov u both!!

Hi,

I have been reading through the posts and my heart goes out to you... it's amazing how spiteful people can be at times.

When I first got with my fiance (we were friends whilst he left his fiance and it turned it to more afterwards) she used the im pregnant line when she realised nothing else would have an effect and she was clutching straws... but it soon came to nothing.

Just bear in mind people use the 'pregnant' card to hurt people as it is a very emotionally involved situation.

I know it is hard to forget about it... have you actually seen this woman recently to know whether she has had it, or is she stringing you along? It is very easy to make things up over the phone, email etc.

The main thing you need to think about is looking after you and the baby... try and take your mind off it, by doing other things, give yourself a manicure, pedicure, try out some new recipes, treat yourself for the next few weeks to try and reduce your stress levels.

I hope it all works out for you, stay strong for you and the baby if nothing else, and remember your bf loves you!!

Take care,

Laura

Thank you Laura233 for those encouraging words, it feels really good to know that i am not alone and that i have sisters here. Thank you so much and all i know is she will never win, what my bf and myself have is more precious than a 1 night stand and ever since what he did i truely say he does everything to show me he will never leave me..

I am going to be strong ladies, even if it kills me ...

Err - are you sure there actually is a baby here? It's very unlikely that she would be allowed to go more than three weeks past her due date. I think there's a major element of fntasy and game playing going on here.

I am sure that she is pregnant but i dont really understand either why it is taking so long for her to give birth

Have you seen a scan picture? That will have the date on it and then you can work out her due date from that? Put it this way - if your boyfriend was the father she should at least show him a picture of the baby!

We have not seen anything, just her stomach growing and growing every month thats about it. She seems to be content with herself does not even bother to even callor even worry what will happen with her baby, i guess she is enjoying seeing me miserable.

One of her friends told my bf in secrecy that her bf does not even know that she is confused about who the father of the baby is and they are happy as ever, i dont know what to think of this whole thing. But then if we go for dna testing then it turns out to be my bf's what the hell am i going to do

She's playing with you - she has no intention of endangering her relationship! And no need to because Gordon Brown is as likely a contender for this babies father as your boyfriend!

I dont understand how someone can be so low like that, what kind of a home is she going to grow her baby in???

This was suppose to be the happiest time of my life and she is messing it all up, she is so cruel.

Hi Tumi,

I have just seen this thread and although I haven't been in this situation one of my friends has and it was so hard for her.

I'm sorry to be the one to say this but can I ask why your boyfriend thought it was okay to go and sleep with someone else in the first place? I know I could'nt trust my boyfriend if he had done this to me, there is no excuse for it and I would'nt bank on him staying around in the future if that's his attitude! But if you have both managed to talk things through and sort it out then good for you

Back to the girl she sounds like a horrible person, do you know her personally or just because of what happened with your boyfriend? Does she know you are pregnant? If so my bet is that she is just trying to put the pressure on you to try and ruin your relationship and your happiness DO NOT LET HER!

Worrying won't get you anywhere it will not change anything, if you and your boyfriend truly love each other then you will find a way to cope with this, just think yes that baby is a result of betrayal but in the end if she and your boyfriend can come to a decent agreement with money and visitation then it could end up being a good thing your LO will have a brother or sister (whether you like it or not) who they will be able to take trips out with, play with and grow with! You just have to try and make the best out of a bad situation.

But I doubt it will work out happily ever after she will probably try to keep tormenting you and your boyfriend with this, get a DNA test done when you can and you will know once and for all at the most you should have to wait is 2 weeks until the baby is born! If she won't allow it, which is what I'm betting on then change your phone numbers and move on as best you can.

Congrats on your pregnancy by the way , get planning for your LO there are alot of things to buy and plenty different types to choose between

Thank you mamadiva for what you have just said, it actually put a smile on my face

I guess in all this i deffinately do feel like he killed me emotionally with what he did and even though i did forgive him i will never forget!!!

Time will only tell ...