40+ mums-to-be and those who've 'popped' - come say hi, pull up a chair and have some cake!

[jeanjeannie]

Hello everyone - yet another thread. I'm expecting a call anyday soon from ITV - as I imagine we'll be prime candidates for taking over the Loose Women slot when they need a break

So, for anyone interested in joining in with us - just jump in and say Hi - we don't bite - unless you're disguised as a chocolate sponge cake

Ladies..................Take it away

I agree with you ermintrude her first loyalty was to her children, not her career and my first thought was to wonder how she could have considered her so badly addicted son could be sufficiently compos mentis to give his agreement to publishing in the first place. I wouldn't mind betting that the reason she didn't anonomise it was because she needed the story to prop up the weak plot of the book she was already writing.

From what the son says and from her appearance on Newsnight I think the son's accusation that she is a bit daft bears some scrutiny. I don't doubt that he has a drug problem but all this waffle about her having to expose him because skunk is a national "emergency" is total boll*x. I think she is a fantasist and we know she is a proven liar as she has now had to admit to having written that Guardian thing despite having denied it in response to her son's direct questioning in the past and carried on writing it in the full knowledge that it was making her children the mockery of their peers. The thing about the pubic hairs - can you imagine?

I think she deserves everything she has got in the past few weeks.

Sorry I have waffled on but she has been irritating me all week.

Re the norkage of my maternal line; massive, matronly and immovable are the words that come to mind . I may be fighting a losing battle...

btw thanks for the link to Gourmet Gardeners - have settled upon the fig tree with figgy jam

Did anyone else see Hugo Rifkind's merciless parody of her column in today's Times? Is very funny...

oh no - I hadn't seen it but very very funny and probably not a million miles from the truth. I wouldn't be surprised if her other children weren't consulting privacy lawyers as we speak...

Thank you all for your kind words about Eva. mrsboogie - she has a combination of her parents' eyelashes (mine long his curly), but she seems to have YOUR eyes! (Yes, I've started catching up on the photos - all the babies are so so lovely. I'm so much more broody now I've got a baby than I was before. How's that for perverse?) JJ yes I particularly love Eva's pointy chin. Occasionally she rests it on mine while staring at her favourite thing - light fittings. jw can you believe where we were just a few months ago?

Tee and peachy, in China babies under 32 weeks are not resuscitated, plus they don't have surfactant here (develops the lungs) so even if Eva had survived the birth in China her subsequent chances would not have been as good.

We're members of International SOS and because the standards here are not great, we are always evacuated to Hong Kong for treatment unless the SOS doctor thinks there are risks. Both when I miscarried in Nov 2007 and when I went into labour with Eva, I was bleeding too much to be safely evacuated and had to be stabilised first. With the miscarriage we were lucky and the Chinese doctor was excellent even if the facilities were not (they do the ERPOC with only gas and air!), with Eva not a single Chinese doctor even examined me and they refused to use the monitor to check I was in labour (neither I nor my doctor on examination, could feel any contractions in the uterus). They literally ignored us and we still don't quite understand it. The SOS doctor eventually took a risk and ordered the evacuation anyway as she feared both Eva and I might die. As it turns out, the unusually heavy bleeding I had was unexplained - the placenta was fine and I would have been safe anyway, but my poor husband was left many hours not knowing.

I had a fabulous private room with a balcony overlooking much of Hong Kong at the Matilda, a beautiful private hospital on the Peak and a restaurant-style menu booked for the birth but it wasn't to be...

peachy how did you like living in China?

jw - I'm such a bubblehead. I did, of course, know your DSS had AS and did intend to address the book recommendation to you too, but I've got such bad baby brain it's almost embarrassing. I really thought it was a myth but I am living proof.

Really great news that you are out and about with K. I didn't have to keep Eva in but I did have to limit her contact with others and every trip out of the house was preceded by intense calculations (how many metres between tables at the coffee shop?) and preparation of back-up plans, so I have an inkling of what you've been through. We took the penultimate hurdle two weeks ago - a shopping mall on a Saturday, and in two weeks the last one - a flight home!

ermintrude I started baking relatively recently and have made all sorts of things but have had cold feet when it came to cup cakes. Your tips are great and I'll definitely be trying those this week. Will let you know how I get on. V jealous that I can't get the sugar decorations.

I don't know who mentioned fake coughing ages ago, but Eva does it too when she wants to wake me up. So funny. Every time she discovers she can make a new noise she makes it repeatedly.

Re Julie Myerson, the only thing I hesitate over is that I don't know how many of the commentators in the press have actually read the book, and I don't know anything about skunk. Having said that I was very disturbed when I found out she wrote her teenager column anonymously - talk about destroying trust. It also suggests to me she knew what she was doing was not fair on her children. Michelle Hanson who wrote about living with her mother used to read the column to her before publication - at least there is honesty there.

mrsj (do you know how close I keep coming to typing mrsbj? It's a combination of the two of you ) when you say a flight home, does that mean you're all coming back to the UK? Has your OH's job finished over there?

I certainly know what you mean about keeping LO from other people. Especially during the winter months and all the bugs that this particular season brings. Bronchiolitis was our biggest fear. She was having monthly jabs against it although it didn't provide total immuity. In the end, she got a mild version of it right at the end of the season (feb). They didn't keep her in hospital and let her come home. Thankfully she didn't require any further O2 either. All the equipment bar the SATS monitor has gone now anyway You say you calculated how far from tables/people etc and I know exactly what you mean. You see every situation as a possible illness. Something that mothers of term babies take for granted, I know I did on my older 3. Our first really big outting was to Ikea a couple of weeks back but I did feel very aware of being in there with all those people and we didn't linger. Yesterday was our first big trip out as a family and mixing with the masses

In answer to your question, no, I can't believe we've both come a long way since we last spoke back in October. Amazing difference in just a few months.

Just laughing at the fake coughs. Brilliant!

K already has 2 favourite tv ads. The world stops spinning when they're on and you'll get nothing from her until they've finished. The first one she likes is the Lloyds TSB with the nice music and the second is the Direct Line one. I think it's a combination of the bright red phones and Stephen Fry's voice. Obviously has her mother's great taste

It's a very beautiful day here. Blue skies, no wind and very mild temperature. I think we'll go out to the park for a promenade.

JJ hope you and yours are feeling better today. Has the vomitting stopped yet? Hopefully the nice weather will put the girls in the mood for a trip to the park

Morning all.

I had an excellent nights sleep and then a horrid morning when DH, who is a klutz and a half, dropped our external hard drive. All of our wedding pictures, as well as back ups of our business files, are on there. Now it won't read.

I am and a bit with him. He is never careful. And now something else that will cost us about 100 quid to fix.

But what really irritates me is him saying 'well, I didn't mean to!' I know he didn't mean to. That doesn't mean he wasn't as careful as he could have been.

tee oh no! I would have given him a real tongue lashing. Maybe you already have done. All I can suggest is taking it in somewhere like PC World and pleading with them to try and save the data on there. Things like that tend to really irritate me. I shouldn't let them as life is far too short.

At least you got a good nights sleep. One good thing to report this morning at least

Oh he got one of those all right JW.

I did realize that most of our wedding pictures are on my flickr. But that still leaves previous business stuff.

I am going to take it to PC World. It just kills me how much it costs!!!

Oh yeah tee I feel your pain on handing over money to PC World or anyone else for that matter. You should let DH foot the bill! At least your pics are on flickr so that's one less worry. Phew.

I really feel like doing something exciting today. Weather is fab and all the older children are busy today so I'm not doing a sunday lunch. Maybe we'll all go out for lunch instead - although that might be a tad ambitious with Katherine. Well, we'll only know if we suck it and see. DH has finally risen from his pit so will put the idea to him.

Woot!

DH and I share all assets, so there's no way to make him foot the bill instead of me!

Go! Have lunch! Its fairly nice here as well!

Phew, I'm glad I didn't attempt to defend Julie Myerson on artistic grounds! Part of the writer's responsibility is to use material carefully. You can't avoid using characters, conversations and situations you've encountered or heard about, but how you use them is what makes the difference. I expect her whole family is feeling very bruised and confused at the moment including the other children. Media interest doesn't help of course - which is why I'm hyper-keen to be anonymous on MN. I can speak freely to you guys and if I ever write a bestseller no unscrupulous types can scroll through my posts and release info about my obstetric history and family relationships! OK it'll never happen, but I can dream...

Mark Lawson in the Guardian review thought the book was good and she was naive. I don't know how that's an excuse really, after the furore about the teenagers column and I'm surprised at his taking that stance.

Tee oh dear, hope you get that fixed at not too much cost. Has DH muttered anything about 'back-up' yet or has he too much sense? . The only time I ever wish we had our own money is for situations like this but I might get a bit punitive ("that cereal bowl was dropped by DS on your watch. you're paying for it") so probably best we don't.

Hope you both enjoy your lunches out (do it *JW!)

mrsjupiter (am writing it out in full to avoid the bj trap , you could be v virtuous and make your own sugarcraft. My mum used to make all the leaves and roses and stuff and was a wiz with the icing syringe. I'm completely cack-handed at anything arty so only decorate with foolproof ready-made items!

ello all

I love that sugar craft stuff if I ever got married it would only be so I could have the dress and a fantastic cake!

Myerson may have been naive but she was also selfish and totally lacking in foresight. The poor boy will never get a job when he does finally sort himself out.

haha re mrs bj mrs bj I sure am not today as I am sick again. Have caught D's latest cold and was up all night with a sore throat. Also seem to have affected my tummy as I can't lie down without acid filling my mouth. Also threw up last night's dinner at 6am. I sound like one of you pregnant ladies! Its all very odd but I am sick of listening to myself whinging so I will shut up!

So, no promenadings for us today as OH also has the cold.

tee boo to the dropped hard drive. That's the problem with keeping all our photos on electronic devices these days instead of stuffed in a biscuit tin.

Just read the Hugo Rifkind in yesterday's Times. How spot on was he? The article further in says that Paxo gave her a pasting on Newsnight but I didn't see it so I dunno.

mrsb is it your turn again for the cold? You and JJ have really bourne the brunt of the bugs flying around I think it's officially spring time on 20th March (only think) so hopefully with a bit of good weather we're all in for a less bumpy ride.

lol@pics in a biscuit tin.

What I forgot to mention about yesterdays outting was the strategic planning with military precision it was. Getting spare nappies, clothes, bottles, kitchen sink etc etc etc ready to go and hoping en route that I hadn't forgotten something really important that would ruin the day. I didn't but couldn't take her solid food. Yes, they would arm the bottles for us. Yes, they actually sold jars of baby food. However, as I explained to DH, I'm still sterilising her bowls and spoons and I doubt they provided that service so, she made do without and gobbled down half a jar of sweet potato when we got home. I felt very guilty as she'd cried with hunger in the car journey back Anyway, no biggy and we all lived to tell the tale.

Yuck. Clouding over here but think we're still going to brave the local park. Miss having the ice cream though (boo sob)

tee in that case if all monies are shared, make him really pay. I'm sure you're inventive enough to create your own little punishment for him

Its all this bloody mixing with the diseased hordes jw you are so right -the thought of trying to protect a premie from it all fills me with horror! well bloody done you for managing it.

yeah Paxo did give her a good grilling one of his v good points was how do they think that this expose will help any other family - it doesn't offer any advice except to kick the child out. She was arguing that people don't realise how strong and therefore dangerous skunk is. She seems to be the sort of person who can remain convinced of the rightness of her own position despite any evidence to the contrary especially if half of what her sister says about her is true.

I gave up on the strategic planning malarky as I could never get out the door - now its just a bottle anda nappy in a plastic bag shoved under the buggy. Although when we take D to OH's mum on Thurs and Fri we practically need a trailer for all the stuff - buggy changing bag, toys, bouncy chair and once even the baby einstein centre.

Morning! Yes I know it's afternoon. We had our leaving party last night and I got to see both ends of it with some sleep in the middle. This morning I've been up, done the clearing up, washed the floor, been to the shops for the papers and eaten a large bowl of fresh fruit of yoghurt listening to just a minute - yet my DP still seems unwilling to arise from his pit. Actually I'm enjoying the peace and quiet and basking in how many brownie points I've earned!

The thing that struck me about Julie Myserson, (Duchesse I'm going to check-out that link in a minute) is how they went on about what a golden boy this son was, how brilliant at school, what high hopes they had for him, etc. and yet never considered his rebellion might be linked to their unwillingness to accept him for the person he was and make him feel like that was OK No, it had to be the drugs. It couldn't be their parenting, could it! Also, they keep citing the fact that he once came to Sunday lunch without a t-shirt on, which I think sounds charmingly eccentric but obviously they can't have anything besmirch their Sunday Telegraph lifestyle.

Tee I bet a little computer shop would do your data transfer for less money than PC World. I nearly bought a cable in their the other day for 12 quid but ended up getting it from an electrical shop for about 75p!

MrsJ we loved China but there was no end of strangeness. I once acted out a headache in what I hoped was a chemist, in the hope of proper painkillers, and got taken next door to the hairdressers! I'm interested (and horrified) to hear about the maternity care. Where we lived people had their one child and thereafter anthropomorphized their pets - a dog in my block wore a rather slutty pants and skirt outfit - weird!!

ermintrude that was the backup! We bought a new computer about 6 months ago, so we put all of the old computer files on the external hard drive. I keep meaning to move a copy to this computer, but never did it.

JW he's paid a bit already by making me a very yummy bacon sandwich for my lunch!

The thing about this Myerson stuff is that no one is blaming her husband for anything, although he seems to be with her 100% on all of it. I get the feeling he did know about the column and thought it was just fine for her to do that.

Hasn't nearly all the Myserson family been to various newspapers with their side of the story? (more publicity for her, more shame and damnation on the boy). My motto to my children - and is/will be to the two LO's here - is what is said/happens within the family, stays within the family. It's always worked for us. I just don't get how a mother can betray her son for her 30 pieces of silver

mrsb yep. The trailer idea is a good one. As I was packing the car yesterday I kept thinking that if we went on holiday for the week, we'd have more suitcases than the Andres. DH's brother was here on Friday saying 'ah you should go abroad while she's little. Won't cost you anything for her on the plane.' And I'm thinking that I couldn't think of anything more tortuous for both myself and DH. We'd probably have a nervous breakdown by the time we arrived back home.

tee I sincerely hope you have more planned in your campaign of punishment for DH! Milk it for all you can dear. Only 3 months to baby's arrival. Then you kind of get left behind as the spotlight shines on LO (as it rightly should do )

Oh dear Tee, that's bad . (Note to self: back up EVERYTHING now). Glad you've saved some on Flicker.

Just got my breast-pump, steriliser and bottles down from the attic along with the old buggy. I reckon I can sew up the bits where the plastic is poking through, and must make sure my amateur stitching is always covered by a cozytoes or something (not for the baby's comfort, just to avert my shame ). Looking at the pump I realise I'd be really happy never to use it at all but I suppose if I ever want to leave the babe for a few hours it's going to be needed. We were always thinking ahead to my return to work and baby at nursery with the previous 2 DC so this is a new experience.

duchesse I love that link. That's what I'm like about Coco Pops; they are the devil's work .

peachyfox lol @ the dog in tarty skirt! DH has long yearned to take the Paris-Moscow-Beijing train and spend some time in China, don't know if we'll ever do it but it's a great idea. that they won't care for a 32-week gestation baby though; that's appalling!

Quickly calling in from JJ towers....hazmat suits on though - face masks at the ready - there is a red cross daubed on the door. Bottoms are footloose and fancy-free here

Not sure what I think about this whole Myerson malarky - not read enough about it but it does sound like lazy writing. I agree with ermintrude people you know and meet are always going to influence you - but usually you give them the benefit of anononimity. Sadly she's not given this to her nearest and dearest. Possibly she didn't think out the consequences, or maybe like some of my former colleagues within the media, she has an unhealthy ambition and most of her life/work revolves around her, and her desires. This obviously isn't compatible with being a mother if it's at the expense of your children. I think the roles of mother and ambitious writer with a sniff of fame became muddled and the latter took president. ermintrude asides - but many people I know who put pen to paper as a profession have a tendancy to disappear up their own Ar*e

tee OMG - I'd be fuming AND looking round for a biscuit tin

jw hope you got out - it's lovely here - not that I've inspected the day closely. I HAVE made jelly though. Actually I made it yesterday and I can't tell you how it makes me feel..................ugh......I can barely bring myself to touch it or look at it. DP is giving it to Iris now. Yes, I have an irrational fear/loathing/distrust of jelly So, add that to the list of food in jars and squeezy tubes!

peachy glad you enjoyed your party. Your travels sound like they're make interesting reading.

Oh - almost forgot. emintrude that link you posted last night to the Cake Disaster website had me howling for ages...I had tears rolling down my face. I've posted it onto my mate in Dubai who was equally appreciative.

This post has taken 4 hours....so thread has probably travelled to Oz and back since I started.....

JJ and ermintrude I looked at the cake disaster link too. That cake with the writing 'scrawled' over the design would look like the cake after I'd had a go at it. I loved it!

Jelly? Obviously not KY but Chivers? You fear it? Have you been watching too many B-movies?

JJ thought of you before. Y'days Times mag is devoted to fashion (see 'out of my league prices' and 'wouldn't wear it anyway'). Not sure if you've seen it yourself but try and snaffle a copy from someone. There's lots of shit interesting articles written on what's hot and what's not. I'm in the latter category.

We have a sparrow in our loft. Hopping all over my Decleor which my DH thinks is most charming I'm all for blocking up the hole under the eaves and throwing the nest out. DH has already named it Eric. You can see which one of us got our own way.......

aww poor Eric - shame you haven't got a cat jw that'd see him off

No Sunday dinner here today - its a bad sign when the roast goes uncooked. I'm sucking on Gaviscon tablet and wondering how heartburn goes with a cold virus and whether I will be fit for work tomorrow.

jj can I borrow your red paint and brush please as we need a cross on the door too!

OH's dad just dropped off our Ikea cot and a mattress and some lovely colourful bedding. They are so good to us...

wow mrsb. A new cot AND bedding. How good are they? If I give you my address........

As for Eric, if the dog could get up the ladder he'd have a go at getting hold of our lodger.

OOOh what a horrid combo there; heartburn and a cold You deserve something alcoholic except I bet it'd make your heartburn worse.

My daughter bought me a posh scented candle that I was going to buy, as an early mother's day prezzie. I lit it today and DH said 'is someone burning rubbish in one of the gardens again?' That man has no bloody taste, honestly.

Dentist for me in the morning. Oh I cannot wait Only bonus is that it's free. Probably my last check up (and treatment if needed) before my maternity runs out. Better get him to pull the lot out and gimme gold ones then The pimp look is soooo me!

JW I'm seeing you as a pirate with those gold teeth, kind of swashbuckling and slightly dangerous. Especially to sparrers, har har jim-lad etc.

My DH is intolerant of almost all scented candles except one called 'Winter' by the White Company. A friend gives us one every year and that lovely smell in the sitting room has become part of Christma for us now.

JJ I said I wouldn't attract attention to members of my family by writing about that, I never said nuffink about not disappearing up where the sun don't shine from time to time. Hazard of the job. DH usually pulls me out before I start enjoying the atmosphere.

I'd happily writhe naked in jelly

Mrsb hope the lurgy leaves your house soon and that the cot is a winner.

Evenin' all.

Reminder: do not go to a 2.5 hour movie when 6ish months pregnant. Watchmen was interesting (if bloody loud and very violent) but way to long to sit there in an uncomfortable theatre seat! Did, however, enjoy the baby back ribs at TGI Fridays after!

Was a bit when I went to the loo and two small girls were in there with no parent. They were maybe 6? Younger? Way to young to go to toilet in a public place alone, IMHO.

JJ and Mrsb sorry you've both got the plague. Hope everyone feels better soon!