TTC grads - the one where the old temp buddies come home to roost!!!!

[rainbowdays]

The old thread was getting impossibly slow on my computer, so decided that it was time to create a new one with hopefully Rah and Ready joining us, and with a whole new due date list.....

so MrsM, Momwi - come and start the list and hopefully Rah and Ready will come here now too!!!!!

I am so excited that the temp buddies are back together again, can you tell?!?!?!?

Iam - huge congrats!!! Welcome Herbie!!

Minxi - Lovely to hear from you, I always wonder how you are!

Good day followed by tricky day... grumpy baby who refuses to sleep longer than 30mins!Settles fairly well after night feeds now though, so positives to be found!

lottie - I had one of these for Cassius and used it loads in the pram - I could never get to grips with getting him in the snow suits with legs! and also he couldnt move once he ws in one - whereas these ones are easier and you load the layers underneath.
I also had a hideously expensive down filled cocoon which was amazing too. Glad you liked the blankets - I promise you will not regret getting them- I bought about 4 different types of generic cellular blankets and gave all the rest away once I felt those ones.

rainbow - also with you in the 2ww although it is really a 6ww as no hope this month anyway!

hope the pil have been ok today fettle - admire your dedication to being a good daughter in law - I am rubbish!

hideously expensive cocoon
sorry lottie - I am the temptation queen!

{{seaside hides before she is run out of town but much more sensible and monetarily responsible mummies }}

Ooh Seaside - I want one of those for me!!!! They look so snug and cosy and warm and lovely! Suppose I could get inside my sleeping bag, if I knew where I'd hidden it, but that picture looks so cosy and I'm not sure I'd get the same feeling in my sleeping bag!!!!

PIL have gone - thank goodness!!! Cannot begin to go through all the rubbish I've had to deal with, and I doubt you've got the time, but I'll just tease you with a couple of the best I've had today.

Picture lunch in a cafe after a long run around an adventure playground for the kids and slow walk around the lovely house for the adults, so we are all hungry and the children are tired and a bit bored. Waiting for our meals, I had to prevent Toby climbing all over his chair and sticking his knife in his eye, while playing I-spy with DD, while [get this!] PIL sat in SILENCE!!! Not even trying to have a conversation between themselves, just sat there watching me struggle - NO ATTEMPT to help me. FGS, I'm on my own here, HELP ME!!!!!!. Then later walking to the car, Toby decided he was too tired to walk anymore, but didn't want to go in his pram. Normally I would fight him, but I just couldn't be arsed, so I picked him up and struggled to push the pram one-handed. Did I get any offer of help?! Did I a;lfsdkjads;lkfj;laksdjf;lkasdhsa;kd.

I've done my duty and there is no way I'm having them back unless I have to before DH is back. We are going there for a weekend before Christmas, but I've already said I'm going on Saturday morning, not Friday night. I'm being mean really, as MIL is lovely and the DC adore her and she gets down on the floor and plays proper games with them. And she did some gardening! Step-FIL also did some essential DIY for me, which was great. And step-FIL is no worse than my father, but at least I can tell him he's being dull or moan at my mother about him!! and step-FIL never wanted his own children, he inherited DH and his brother, so these grandchildren have been thrust upon him a bit. So feel better for ranting at you all - please ignore me!!!!

So how is everyone else? Hope you had good weekends?

Lottie - that does sound pretty cold, but I wouldn't strand yourself too much. Surely if they are wrapped up really really well you can get some fresh air on sunny, calm days? I took Toby skiing at 12 weeks and it was freezing, but wrapped up warm in his pram, he was almost too toasty I think! And he looked very cute with his little sunglasses on, so you really only saw his nose, behind his hat and blanket and sunglasses.

Right - going to get into X-factor now!!!

xxx

its taken me ages to catch up!

herbie herbie herbie! welcome to the world little one! i bet he is GORGEOUS iamamummy, and i cant wait to hear about your homebirth. so glad it all worked out for you. hope the feeding is still going well.

hiya everyone else.

fettle - i would have been annoyed too! my PIL are a bit like that too and my mum is so far the other way that that gets annoying too!!! they can't win really can they! it is part of their jobs as PILs to be really annoying!

Seaside - i think we may buy one of those cocoons, it is just what i was looking for to put baby in, in the P&T cocoon bit. Great for a December baby! It is gorgeous.

LOL lottie - I saw that wool one as well - serious dosh! I think could only justify it if moving to Alaska as the babies would like Nanook of the North (I have to say the down ones are amazing though - as very light not restricting but def the idea of buying one is let alone 2!)

I am sure that your cervix will be just fine too. They will be coming a bit earlier than 40 weeks anyway won't they - I think you said D day is NYE (pretty momentous start t0 2010 - how cool(or not ) if you could deliver around midnight and have one in 2009 and the other in 2010 ! I think contractions are diff for everyone but in my exp and the general consensus they are an extreme period-like cramp. I only had one braxton hicks one and that actually felt quite diff than actual labour - it was more a tightening and hardening than a pain/cramp.

fettle - when I got our cocoon I also wanted one in my size too!! Have to admit to customising it now and using it as a foot warmer for me on cold winter nights on the sofa! What a nightmare with your PIL - You are very good - I would have snapped and stroppily told one of them to push the buggy probably!

Hope all is well with Herbie

Greedy - how is your sis?

hi all- gone a bit quiet... so just bumping us really.

Iam- how is herbie? Hope everything going well and that Oscar has taken to his little bro. x

lottie lottie! these midwives are daft creatures sometimes! i think cos they are dealing with pg women all the time they forget how everything they say gets analysed by us pregnant women. she probably wasn't implying anything by talking about contractions. and i think its very true that you 'just know' when they start! you are a bit unsure to start with but after a few and they start to get worse, you 'just know'!

i sold my red leather skirt on ebay for a whopping £2.69!!! not worth the bother really, but altogether i have made over £180 just by selling lots of old crap clothes. spent about the same unfortunately, but hey, its keeping me busy!! and keeping my wardrobe varied!

my sis is doing absolutely fantastically thanks seaside! she is coping so much better than i ever thought she would! sounds mean, but i thought she would struggle to start with, but she really seems a natural to me! dh freaked out earlier when i said we couldn't throw the steriliser away in case we needed it again!!..........i think he has forgotten that i want another one in 2 years time! or he is in denial.

better go, got patients waiting

Hi all - I'm here, just not really in the mood for posting anything. Feeling a bit bleurgh!

Lottie - do you have anyone you could ask from the UK to answer your questions? Is it Germany you've moved to, or Austria - can't remember at the moment. I think that Germany anyway are renowned for being a bit more hands-on shall we say and into interventions. However, having said that they are probably giving you a worse case scenario. You may well have a short cervix naturally and it is not related to the pregnancy - however, there is probably no way of knowing that, unless you happened to measure you're cervix previously? When are you next seeing the consultant? MAke sure you have a list of questions written down to ask him/her and don't be fobbed off. It would be a shame to worry your way through the rest of your pregnancy, if you don't have to.

Can't help on the contractions front - I was induced with both mine, so went straight in to big full on contractions! But have to say that mine felt quite like my braxton hicks, thereby concluding that they are different for everyone!

Off to bed now, to wallow under my duvet and double-blanket!

xxx

hi ladies

sorry not posted but things are pretty manic here, i have posted this in bf'ing but wanted your valuable opinions too....

hi ladies

I have a 6 day old ds who i am bf'ing, however my left nipple is cracked, bleeding and bloody painful! my right side is very sore but i am still managing to feed but the left has become literally impossible. I gave ds formula this morning as i just couldnt bare the pain. i really dont want to give up as i know this is what is best for him and he wasnt too keen on the formula anyway. what can i do?

feed from the right and express from the left?

nipple shields?

i have no clue and desperate for advice!

thanks

forgot to mention, i have seen the bf'ing lady and she said he is latching on lovely with a very strong suck and that the pain should ease off. 2 days later.....still agony!

Iam! Poor you. How hard? All I can say is that I had the same with toby. I was literally sobbing as I tried to latch him on. I got avent nipple cream which did seem to soothe my nipples. Wish I'd known about lanolin one can't remember name sooner as it was magic. It suddenly improved when ds was around 10 days I think. I never had trouble with pain with dd so was a bit shocked tbh to have problems with toby.

Try and hang in there but if u need to give up remember you've given him the very important colustrum so don't feel too guilty about it. It is better to be happy and enjoying your baby.

Take care

xxx

Iam- Is this your first time BF or did you feed Oscar- sorry can't remember. I had really sore nips with DS1- cracked and bleeding- and basically I just gritted my teeth and put up with it- and it DID get better. Can't exactly remember how old he was but all I can say is stick with it- avoid giving him formula if you can. The pain is awful but if you keep thinking about what a good thing you are doing for Herbie . I am sure lots of women give up around this time becuase it is blooming sore- but honestly your nipples will get better.
Lansinoh I think is the name of the nipple cream.
Big hugs x

Definately Lansinoh - its miracle stuff... In between 'left' feeds wallop a load on and cover it up so it doesn't rub on anything, and as Honey says it should be better soon if you grit your teeth. Sometimes with Theo I would cry before feedling him (particularly at night when everything seems worse) when I knew it was my 'bad side' coming up.

But like fettle says, whatever you decide DONT beat yourself up about your decision if you go for formula. If its really not working and making you miserable then I reckon you need to follow your own gut feel.

For what its worth, MrsMc was very successful with nipple shields and it was hte only way she fed Xavier in the end, so it seems they can work a treat!

Lasanoh - that's the stuff!!!

Iam - forgot to mention that I so nearly gave up with Toby as I was in so much distress, but suddenly I noticed that there was an improvement that feed, so I perserved for another couple of days and it got progressively better each day. I'm so pleased that I worked through the pain as I loved feeding him as he got older.

Chooster!!! Was getting really worried that you'd come down with Swine flu!!

xxx

lansinoh!

Why not call it something easy - like "help my nipple are about to fall off!"

yep! stupid name!!! but yes, i used that too in my brief 3 weeks that i fed ellis for! it helped a lot, and dont panic if he sicks up blood cos it will have come from you if your nips are bleeding...........I remember panicking about that with ellis and phoning NHS direct cos i thought he had internal bleeding or something!!

Second the lansinoh for sore nipples, I still use it now when sore. It is miracle stuff! Iam, I have some nipple shields if you want them... I know it sounds an odd thing to offer second hand but I couldn't get on with them, only used one once - if you'd like them, shout on facebook and I could pop them in the post.

How is everyone doing?

I need a bit of breastfeeding advice myself - H never cries for food except in the middle of the night - but she has dropped on the weight chart, only putting on 2oz in 2 weeks. The HV are a little concerned and want to make sure she puts on more next week. I am worried that she isn't getting enough from me... I don't want to give up BF, but I am not going to starve H just so I can continue... the HV said to feed her more often, but I am not sure how to when she doesn't ask for it! She said to offer both breasts, which I have only done at growth spurt times, so I have no idea whether I am coming or going and I am worried I will never have a breast drained fully now. What should I do? tips? advice? words of comfort?

xx

Hi Ready

I wouldnt worry too much about H's weight in terms of those dreaded charts (They are still based on bottle fed babies apparently anyway). If H is happy- having wet and pooey nappies then I am sure she is fine- we need Bodders on this one. Isla was always little and had similar worries as you- different babies do different things- some feed little and often- some guzzle down both breasts at one feed. If you have fed H and she seems full, see if you can get her to do a big burp and wake her up a bit if she has got sleepy and then offer the other side. BF babies don't take more than they need- unlike bottle babies (who are usually bigger). I think when you have a bottle of milk you want to get baby to finish it all up- but it is very different with BF cos as you know you can't really judge how much they have had. I am sure she is getting enough milk.

Iam- how are you?

Ready- Dex started off quite big 8lb 6 (just above 50th centile)- but then he started going down on his chart quite a lot around 10weeks to the 9th centile- but he then levelled out about 16 weeks on the 25th centile. (Just got out his red book to have a look!) How often do you take her to be weighed? Once a month is plenty IMO.

Ready - ignore the HV totally, she is talking rubbish !!!! Firstly if H is doing wet and dirty nappies, and has some alert time during the day: then she is getting enough food. The weight charts are for formular fed babies, you can get a breastfeed baby weight chart and it is totally different. Breastfed babies do not put on as much fat as bottle fed babies, as they do not "finish the bottle" they stop when they have had enough, bottle fed babies tend to just swallow was is offered as it does not take much effort. Also please do not listen to her about switching sides - your breast cannot empty of milk. By switching to the other side you are offering more foremilk rather than hind milk. The foremilk is sweeter and more watery and babies love it, but the hind milk contains the calories. By switching sides you are only going to give her more foremilk and this will not help with weightgain. Hence why I tell you to ignore the HV, she is giving you poor advice. As I said if H is not fretting for food, is having time where she is alert, and having wet and dirty nappies, then she is doing great, ignore all weight issues. Sorry I will get off my hobby horse now....

Iam - you have been told the miracle cream here by the others! I did use nippleshield with ds1 for a while, it helped me with the pain, as ds1 had a tongue-tie, which caused problems for me feeding him. But When he was a couple of months old I gradually stopped using the shields and was ok.

You can feed from one side and express from the other, I did this too but it does lead you down a path of supply issues, as pumping is not as effective as the baby latched on. However pumping is less painful than the baby latch, so if you can't manage anything try hand expressing and or pumping and just feed from the other side more often. Even women with one breast only can successfully breastfeed, your breasts will adapt to supply. However by feeding more from one side that side might become more sore, so make sure you are liberal with the lansinoh.

Also beware to make sure you do not let the sore side become engorged and swollen, as that will make latching even harder and risk mastitis.

Just remember that this is a temporary phase, it does get much much easier I promise.