TTC grads - the one where the old temp buddies come home to roost!!!!

[rainbowdays]

The old thread was getting impossibly slow on my computer, so decided that it was time to create a new one with hopefully Rah and Ready joining us, and with a whole new due date list.....

so MrsM, Momwi - come and start the list and hopefully Rah and Ready will come here now too!!!!!

I am so excited that the temp buddies are back together again, can you tell?!?!?!?

Good to see two lovely long posts from you seaside and Lottie! .

Totally empathise Seaside - its so easy to just expect it to happen again when you plan as you've been there and done it before! Conception is such a wierd unpredictable thing - hope it happens fast . When we were trying again after DS1 I didn't think I would be that worked up about it, but I did pretty much become obsessed - thats when I found MN! . In fact even though we are not ttc in any way, I had a moment in the last week when my period arrived. I've been using a persona machine for contraception (which is ace!) but I'd forgotten that I started the machine a day late that cycle so I ovulated a day earlier than expected and we had done the deed quite close to my 'red / dont have sex' days. The little sperm fellas would have had to have lasted 4 days to meet the egg but still there was that possibility! When CD1 came along I was a mixture of relieved and a little disappointed - and I'm not even TTC!!!

Great to hear about your progress Lottie - Hope you are feeling OK about your move? Sorry that your suffering a bit with carpal tunnel - just what you dont need right now! I only have experience of friends that have twins but every one of them loves it (at least they love it now ). The early days may be a bit more intense but now they are a bit older its great for them. You truly are blessed although it may not feel like it at times . So, where was this snotty thread? Was it a ttc thread or a thread about the ttc threads. I've seen some in the chat area where people can be realy critical and patronising about the people on the ttc boards.

All of us would love to hear how your pregnancy is progressing Lottie so please pop back on here soon - especially to let us know how your move has gone. Good luck!! And good luck to you seaside - keep us posted (in a 'no pressure' kind of way!)

hiya

hi lottie lovely to hear from you. Good luck with your move and have a fun night out in soho. I have a friend with twin girls who have just turned one- she says that the first year has been pretty hard- and hasnt really left the house very much! BUT- she says that she has the girls in an excellent routine which she has worked really hard on and it is paying off for her. Her girls are so gorgeous. I think it is better to be worried about it rather than thinking it will all be easy!

Sorry got to go- Dex is crying somewhere in the house...

Lovely to hear from you Lottie... totally intrigued about the threads of meanness... point me in the right direction so I can see . Good luck in Zurich.

Seaside, we have been thinking about cranial ostepathy for the colic, but a friend of ours did it and said that whilst she thought it helped, she wondered if it was just baby growing that did the trick, and this has put doubts into DH's mind of if it worth it. Hmm.

We stopped using the infacol as it was bunging her up and she was constipated and making things worse. She is still suffering with the colic, but touch wood doesn't seem to be worse since stopping the colic. Going to try gripewater, and the colic massage seems to be helping. H slept from 9.30pm til 4 - 6.5 hours!!! I was about the burst, leaking everywhere - and on top of that was really worried... is it ok for her to go that long without food?

xx

...stopping the infacol. DOH. Baby brain

hi ready - i think its ok for her to go that long without food. You've said before that she has been gaining weight well which is great so I wouldn't worry about her stretching things out at night - fingers crossed you'll have a good sleeper from early on. Is she about 4 weeks now? There may be other views but I reckon just try to enjoy it when you can.

Ready- don't worry about H sleeping that long- try and enjoy it- I used to wrap a towel around my chest when DD slept (she was a good sleeper from 6wks) cos I would be leaking everywhere and getting the bed soaked. My DS1 had cranio at about 4 weeks cos he wasnt very happy- especially lying down and didnt sleep well at all. He was a forceps baby. I cant tell you whether it definitely worked but he did seem calmer and would lie on his back after a coupld eof sessions. Very weird though- it doesnt look like the osteopath is doing anything at all. VERY gentle manipulation. I felt at the time it was worth the money.

Yes- what is this weird thread with bitchy TTCers??

gone quiet again!

Greedy- are you on hols? How is your sis?

really should be doing something more useful than farting about on the computer...

just got back from 2 weeks in spain yesterday. had a lovely time, even quite relaxing! marcy was a superstar and had no problem staying up till 11.30pm or not having dinner till 10pm. never would have tried that with the other two, but she was amazingly chilled out, so we had a great time!
my poor sister was due to have a c-section last thur cos she has a low lying placenta, but when she got into hospital, they said the baby's head had engaged and she should go home and wait for nature to take its course! poor thing! anyway, she is being induced tomorrow, so hopefully she will have her little baby in the next day or so!

rainbow - so sorry to hear about your mc. are they going to do some investigations at the hospital to find out whats going on cos thats more than just bad luck now isn't it?

choster - your school terms are a bit odd aren't they!? hope it went ok for him, its very emotional when they start isn't it? kiki starts in sept too and i know i will cry buckets! they break them in very gently at her school too, but i think they are all different.

iam - glad to hear you are getting the nappy problem sorted cos now i can laugh about it without feeling guilty!!!

seaside - yippee ttc again!!! how exciting! just read a bit further on and saw you hit cd1. i think ttc is harder second and third time round somehow, cos you already KNOW what its like to have a baby and how much you want it again. but like you said, you know your body can do it, and you know being relaxed is the key! are you friends with any other MNers on fb? i am friends with rainbow, fettle, scorpio, babylove, iam, chooster and now ready and i am 'julie jones' so i must be qute easy to find!!

ready - hello! nice to be your FB friend although i havent even had a chance to look at any pics yet, so i still dont know what you look like!! we moved all of ours into their own rooms after a couple of weeks and found that we and they all slept better once we had. and go for the cranial osteopathy! i do it at work and mainly get very good results, but agree with honey that it probably looks like we aren't doing much cos the movements are so gentle, but you wouldn't want anything else on your tiny abby would you.

hey lottie !!! - two of my friends who had twins did the contented baby thing and they both had the most amazingly well behaved babies who were in such a fantastic routine so young i reckon its the way to go! one of these had their babies at the end of november and already had a 3 1/2 yr old too and they had us round for a dinner party on new years eve and to stay over when the babes were only 5 weeks old!!!! they are nearly 3 now and a complete nightmare, but thats a different story!!!

ok, better go...............fingers crossed my sis has a speedy induction tomorrow.....

Lottie - so pleased to hear from you, you belong here! Sorry to hear about the carpel tunnel too, I have had that with my pg's, but getting worse each time (so not sure why I am trying again!) Anyway, all the people I know with twins love having two also, it is hard work, but twice the rewards they say. Are you in touch with the people at TAMBA yet?

Seaside - sorry to hear that you are on cd1 again. Rubbish isn't it. But we have to just relax and try again!

Ready - enjoy H having longer sleep time, just be careful you don't get mastitis, it is easy in the first 6 weeks for that to happen, but normally happens at 2 weeks like me last time. Otherwise just enjoy the longer sleep times while they last.

greedy - good to hear you had a good holiday and that marcy was a superstar. Sorry to hear that your sis is still waiting, not long now though.

I am enjoying not ttc this month, next month I have my recurrent miscarriage appointment at the hospital, not that I expect them to find any thing other than old age to be the cause, but at least I will know then, and see if they can advice anything.

Big wave to anyone else lurking.

Welcome back greedy! Any sister news yet? You must be on the edge of your seat . So good to hear that Marcy was great on holiday, its so much nicer when the kids are relaxed and enjoying themselves .

Good to hear you've got your appointment rainbow, and at least you can relax as much as you can this month and have a few guilt-free glasses of wine .

Honey - did you go for the NCT meeting yet or is that next week?

All good here, DS1 settling into school well and we are juggling the early finish times OK. I had my first day (well half day) with DS2 alone yesterday and it was great to have some time with him .

Longer sleeps are over. As quickly as they began, we had a few lovely long sleeps, then BANG no sleep at all.

Question... is this normal? H is getting much more alert as the days go by, playing on her mat, sat in her bouncer chair this morning in the doorway of the bathroom so I could shower, happy as anything... but she refuses to nap (although she napped mid morning today for 30 mins after a feed) the last couple of days and the rest of today she just won't drift off. She gets really wound up and cries, sometimes I think she is hungry but doesn't eat, and keeps yawning, so I am certain she is over tired - but she can't seem to close her eyes and go to sleep.
Yesterday we were out for a walk, and she clearly got overstimulated because she just began to WAIL - it was a cry like nothing we have heard before, I had to get her out of the pram and walk with her, WAILING, by the time we reached the front door, she had cried herself to sleep in my arms.
Is she normal? Will this pass? Can I help her?

Oh dear Ready- what you have there is a NORMAL baby . I don't think even after 3 that I could ever really understand why sometimes they would just have a screaming fit. If she was fed recently, and has a clean bum, then there really isnt much else you can do- other than give her a cuddle. What pram/buggy have you got? Is it a forward or backward facing one? Avoid all those toy things that you can have flapping about in baby's face as I am sure they DO overstimulate. Babies dont generally get into a pattern of nap times until much older- usually sleeping for a little bit after feed- or when in the pushchair or the car. Sometimes I think that we fuss babies too much and this can be enough to make them cry even more. I don't belive in leaving babies to cry for too long- but a little bit is OK. Did you try a dummy again? Also BF is good for calming babies even if they arent actually particulary hungry. Please don't worry- I am sure there is nothing up with little Hannah- she is just trying hard to get a grips with life too- the real world is a bit scary after so long in your tum. White noise is often good- sit H next to the washing machine. Do you have a sling? I spent a lot of time with all mine carrying them around in sling at home as well as out.

x

Gawd... I think I should rephrase, I don't mean to say is 'she' normal... rather is it a normal scenario? She is perfect
H loves to be walked around while being ssshed. I can't stand to let her cry... had a row with mum as I am 'making a rod for my own back' and that I should 'leave her in the garden to cry herself to sleep'
I have tende to pop her on the breast if she is inconsolable but if she isn't hungry she tends to fuss and punch!
We have the bugaboo, so it is facing me at the moment. She cries a lot in her pram, with or without the toys, I thought it was because she couldn't see I was still there...
Tried a few times with the dummy but no joy... litle finger is all she will entertain.
Sorry if I sounded like a plum... I guess being a control freak makes it hard to not know what to do.

my silly sister still hasn't had her baby!!! she got sent home from hospital yesterday cos she saw a different doctor who asked why she was being induced at only 5 days over! (good question! but thats what the consultant had told her to do the day before!) poor thing! she is now booked in for induction (again!!!) next wednesday!!! hopefully she wont make it that long. i cant wait to meet her baby much longer or i think i might just explode!!!

ready - baby's are tricky customers aren't they! sometimes they just cry i'm afraid! i always remember my hv saying that they cant make any other noise than cry to begin with, so it doesn't always necessarily mean they are really unhappy, just trying to be heard, unless they are really screaming obviously. that made me feel a bit better about leaving them to cry for a bit, mind you i'm a tough old witch anyway!

just had a really lovely afternoon working in my new clinic! didnt like it on tue when i was in there, but today it was great so i'm relieved after spending so much money setting it up and i was really really busy which is what i need to pay off all my huge overdrafts i have now!

gotta go, my bbq chicken bean casserole type thing is almost cooked (a dh speciality!)

t'ra

Ready- Don't feel bad! I never thought you meant H wasnt normal- of course she is perfect .

I don't believe you are making a rod for your own back - so long as you let her have enough time on her own- ie laying awake under a baby gym or in a bouncy chair etc (when she is happy)... I never liked to hear my babies crying either. I think fresh air is good but no point if she is screaming to be left on her own. Patting and shhhing very good to keep reminding baby that you are still there. Every week she will get more content. I think the 6 week mark is a real milestone. Everything will get slowly better. The little baby days are so short- try to enjoy them if you can- don't think I did much with my first though- I was too tired and overwhelmed with it all. Some babies are harder work- but they often end up as very interesting children .

Greedy- hello . Good in a way that your sis isnt being induced just yet- as you say 5 days over is nothing.

Off to Italy tommorrow- DP is down the pub [grr] while I am packing- not sure why I let him do things like that . DS1 has teabags and dishwasher tablets in his hand luggage...

Aww - Ready - I am sorry you and H are having a bit of a hard time. I have no good advice to offer as Cassius just never really cried very much at all But that is def not normal - I know I am VERY lucky. My bf's little girl was much more vocal (and still is 20 months later! very chatty and opinionated in a great way) and honestly she never really understood what it was all about, she was not hungry, was clean, warm etc. My bf swore by her Baby Bjorn carrier thing and used it a lot in the first 6 months as she found her dd a lot calmer in it i.e. very close to her (I used ours once!!)

All that said my bf now also recognises that her dd's crying did used to completely stress her out and so then it became a viscous circle of stress vibing between her and her dd. But that is about as useful as telling someone to relax when they are TTC - hahaha - wasted on me cos I just can't do it!!

Have you tried lying H on her side to sleep with rolled up towel/blanket tucked in her back? Cassius was much happier like that even in the bug - I used to prop him against one side of the carrycot iyswim? He never slept well on his back and still sleeps on his side and front now - in fact now he often sleeps on his knees with his bum in the air very cute!

(I would also suggest trying the cranial osteopath - but I think I may have already said that about a million times so I promise to try not to mention it again! )

Like honey said - white noise is good - C has slept with a CD of a waterfall/stream or his sleep sheep turned on since he was very little and also he sleeps with muslins around him - when he was very little he liked to sleep with them over his face

Again, as honey said 6 weeks is a big milestone and so is 10'ish weeks - you may see big changes then.

greedy - your poor sis just what you need your first time - lots of consultant confusion! So hope her lo makes an appearance before next Weds.

Did anyone else see the good news for our old mate duchesse - she had a little girl this morning - birth sounded a bit tricky (on childbirth topic) but so pleased for her

honey - I feel your pain with the packing - my DH does NOTHING to help at all - grrrr

Chooster - glad school is going well

Lottie - thanks for the TTC sympathy I have to say I just have those annoying AMH results still ringing in my ears and that was 2.5 years ago! I am just sure my ovaries are pretty pooped and I will be extremely lucky to get a another bfp. But as I said I do feel very different to when I was TTC #1 as all I wanted then was to experience pg and have a baby and at least I have had that - problem is I loved it all so much I want to do it again!

TBH I think if I was pg with twins after a long time TTC I would be very mixed up about it.Of course that bfp is fab and amazing and so wanted but I know I had this perfect idea when TTC of how it would be and certainly had enough time to visualise what I wanted and how it would be, nursery, buggy etc etc and twins was not really in that visualisation - so I imagine it would take quite a seismic shift of perspective! Having said all that I have every confidence that you will handle it all beautifully and it will be amazing/testing/brilliant/scary all at once. Most importantly it will be your normality just as having one is mine iykwim? Re the GF book I have to say I bought her book and many others and I used bits from all of them to find what worked for me and C - I am sure you will do the same

You must be on the move now I think - I hope it all goes well. Make sure you don't get too stressed or do too much lifting!

BTW did anyone read that article in the Guardian about studies showing stress is pg linked to ADHD and hyperactivity?? another stick to beat pg women with! Mind you this guy was advocating that maternity leave should be increased and should be start at 6 months pg so the mother has 3 months off before birth, not working in a stressful environment. (how can they regulate stress at home though? plus I was thinking being pg in WW11 must have been stressful but there was not a raft of ADHD baby boomers was there?

Anyway lottie -do post with us here more -go on - we are in the PG topic after all and we all came here when we got bfps - it's just there are not many pg ones around now!! Only you and Iammummy These girls were brilliant at helping with all my pg questions and quibbles - I could not have done so well without them Group hug everyone!

Has anyone seen Babymad around recently?

I have been rambling on now for an hour while doing other stuff online- sorry for the wacky/stream of consciousness post everyone!

that was a MrsMcnr size post !

x posts lottie - your ears must have been burning, you will live long good luck with the move.

cr*p I meant babylove - not babymad

Ok I am giving up and going to bed now - I have overposted and lost it!

wow seaside that really was a mammoth post!!!

babylove is fine.......think she spends all her time on fb now just like bodders spends all her time on her blog.............some of us are still sad enough dedicated enough to post on both of course!

curry on its way! just opened a bottle of wine and it fizzed and it was the last bottle in the house! disaster! luckily dh has gone out to buy beer now to go with our curry! phew!

Hi All

Back from a fabulous 10 days in Brittany with my beautiful family. Had a fantastic time and came home very sadly - possibly because we're now on countdown to DH leaving. He's back up North on Monday and then hopefully we're probably seeing him for at least some of next weekend and then that's it until probably January for 10 days and then end March until he's home properly. I've coped so far by just not thinking about it, but now the time as come I have to think about it and I just want him gone! Sooner gone, sooner home philosophy!

Anyway - I read up a few days ago and probably have forgotten most things, so forgive me, but I just wanted to pop in and say i'm here and think of me!!! In a selfish type way!!!

Lottie - so great to hear from you. I think it's totally normal to be scared about having twins. As others have said those I know with twins obviously love them to bits, but it has been hard work - but just think double the smiles and cute moments to make all the hard work worth it! Good luck with the move - hope it goes smoothly. oh and keep posting as I'm not having another baby, I want to re-live someone else's pregnancy!!!

Rainbow - enjoy your month off TTC. I hope the recurrent MC clinic are more helpful than just telling you that you are getting old! You're not that old anyway are you? People get pregnant much older than you!

Ready - glad to hear from you. How is H's colic? I can really sympthasise - DD was a real crier and it was awful. I hated hearing her cry and so she spent most of the first few months attached to my boob or asleep on my lap after a feed! CAught up on loads of TV!! It was great! Something I couldn't do with Toby as I had DD to look after, so enjoy it!!! DD also didn't sleep very well (Still doesn't, but that's another tiring story!!). My mum used to try and make me feel better by saying it was a sign of intelligence, so hang onto that thought (although by that reckoning, Toby is as thick as they come!!, but then DD was talking in sentences by 24 months, Toby can still barely say a recognisable word, so maybe there is some truth in it!!) As someone else said, as for sleeping in the same room, you do whatever is best for you and Hannah - there are guidelines, but you have to work with what works for you as a family! I was much more relaxed with Toby with regards to sleeping - on his side or front and it may be why he is still is a better sleeper (he also does the bum in the air pose like Cassius!)

Honey - enjoy your break - sounds lovely - although you are good letting DH out while you pack!!

Chooster - very cute pictures of DS1 on FB! Is he enjoying school? Does seem a very gentle run in for them! DD went straight to full days down here! When do you find out about work?

Greedy - glad your new work premises are working out ok. I've lost impetus for my course being on holiday - I hope it comes back, as I don't want to get too far behind in my coursework. Glad you had a fab holiday too - again the photos look fantastic - was it a villa you were staying in? Looks gorgeous!

Seaside - competing with your mammoth post here! You think a lot of cranial osteopathy then?!! I think that's what my sister is offering to pay for DD to have after all her orthodontic treatment as I think sister suffered a lot with pain - so it is good to hear that it is much less intrusive nowadays! Good luck with the TTC and staying relaxed about it!!! I have to say that MN is not a good place to be if you are trying to stay relaxed about TTC! But we'll all be here to support you.

Bodders - we miss you!!!

Iammummy - how you getting on? You finished work yet?

Sure I've missed someone, but it is not intentional - really ought to pay some attention to my lovely husband!

Take care all (if you're still reading this!!!!)
xxx

Aww, thanks Fettle! Sorry, so busy with guests and stuff this summer. Glad to hear you had a smashing hol. I understand where you're coming from with your philosophy on your DH's departure, that's a long old stint he's doing isn't it.

Ready - so sorry to hear you're having a bit of a hard time with an unsettled babe. It is so so difficult when you want to make them happy but nothing you do seems to help. But eventually you will find your own little tricks and tips for calming her - annoyingly, all babies are so different and what soothes one might make another freak out! Both mine were very unsettled in the evenings up until the early hours, and it is KNACKERING - pacing and patting and feeding and bicycling for hours on end. But they did both grow out of it quite quickly (about 10-12 weeks I think - it didn't seem quickly at the time though!) so hang in there. Isla used to feed and feed and feed in the evenings, but we were rewarded by a long sleep afterwards, so don't worry if Hannah can sleep for 6 or 7 hours, that sounds fine to me and hope it is the start of a pattern (and some longer sleeps for you!)

Sorry can't chat for longer as have got loads of work on at the moment too, so big waves to everyone else and see you all soon xx

Oh and Seaside - very excited to hear you are TTC again, but sorry to hear this month was not to be.

Rainbow - really sad to hear you've suffered another miscarriage but taking a break sounds like a good plan and let your body have a good rest x