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Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

TTC grads - the one where the old temp buddies come home to roost!!!!

932 replies

rainbowdays · 03/01/2009 09:31

The old thread was getting impossibly slow on my computer, so decided that it was time to create a new one with hopefully Rah and Ready joining us, and with a whole new due date list.....

so MrsM, Momwi - come and start the list and hopefully Rah and Ready will come here now too!!!!!

I am so excited that the temp buddies are back together again, can you tell?!?!?!?

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
fettle · 10/03/2009 17:47

don't let my experience put you off coil. Think it is fine for most people! I think bodders has one . I think she told us that. Just not for me. I've suffered from depression in past so shouldn't really have had it anyway. Was just convincedby registra when I was about to have op last spring. While we have you why not put one in. Sounded perfect at time!!!

Thanks for reassurance on toby clips. I think boys clips would be a grand idea honey!!

I too worry about how like me dd is. She is very much I can't if she can't do something straight perfect first time and gives up. Has made learning to read really frustrating! But she does have some stubborn determination from dh so does to e things a go which I never did so hoping that side wins over!!!

Rainbow sorry to hear jak is poorly. Really can't wait for better weather and some healthy time!!

Xxx

Chooster · 10/03/2009 20:59

Maybe you are just psychic greedy

fettle · 12/03/2009 18:54

we'd disappeared!

Chooster - forgot to ask? how is work? Horrible atmosphere, or not that bad - I hated it when redunancies were happening at my work (but mainly because I knew I wouldn't be eligible and I so wanted to go!!!).

How do you feel? Secretly excited that you might be a SAHM, or worrying about the financial side of it all? Sorry very personal questions - you don't need to answer them!

Honey - how is the tile search going?

Greeds - hope Marcy is better soon?

Big waves to everyone else
xxx

rainbowdays · 13/03/2009 10:01

Ready, MrsMc and Rah - could we have a list of your due dates please!!!!! Mrs is 25 weeks, Rah is 24 and Ready is 22 weeks by my vague memory, is that right?

Fettle - how are you doing with the difficult decision on whether to move up north now or not?

Chooster - any news on the job situation?

OK ladies I need advice AGAIN!!!! As you know there is only 15 months age gap between my ds and dd, but I am having difficulty as my dd is more advanced academically (as girls generally are) than my ds. For example: My ds is still learning basic phonics while my dd is already able to read Peter and Jane books with relative ease, despite being younger than him. How do I handle this situation. I want to encourage both of them with reading, but do not want to damage ds' confidence when he sees dd doing things so easily. How do you all handle sibling jealousy/competiveness etc?

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Chooster · 13/03/2009 11:30

wow, i'd forgotten those 3 ladies were so close together. . very exciting . Just waiting for my cousin to pop now - she 3 days late and each time my phone beeps I think its her... Its got to come out soon though .

Fettle, I'm a mixture of both those things really. I would be pretty excited to be a SAHM, especially as the timing would be perfect with max starting school - I could do all the pick ups / drop offs and really be there to help him settle in - and then I'd get loads of time with Theo. But we would worry about money, DH's job is not that steady so some months are good, some not so good so that may put pressure on us for the mortgage. Our plan B was always to sell the 2 flats we have in London if I lost my job but of course the property prices are crap at the moment and I'd hate to get rid of them at such a low price. I guess I'll find out soon enough... .

Rainbow - I can't help you too much as my boys are equally as slow . Greedy may be in a similar boat though. However there must be areas where your DS is more advanced than DD. Its just probably best to explain that all people learn things at different speeds, whether its academic or physical, but it all usually balances out in the end and make sure your DS gets just as much praise for learning something new academically as DD. How is jak?

Minxi - How is baby Lewis? can we see some pics .

greedygreedyguzzler · 13/03/2009 17:44

hello!

rainbowdays - is your dd in reception already then? i dont really have the same problem as you cos my ds isnt a typical boy (might have mentioned that before!) and he is actually a bit of a girly swot so still well ahead of dd. she hasnt started any reading at nursery yet, only what i do with her at home so she just knows basic phonics and easy stuff. her writing is much much neater than his though, but i think that is a girl thing. sorry, cant help much!

marcy is still ill! i have never felt this tired in my life! she hasnt slept properyl since saturday night. no more than 2 hours consecutive sleep for her (or me!). she keeps screaming out in pain and has only eaten 3 cheeses strings and a few blueberries ( and loads of milk! )since sunday. hopefully she is on the mend now cos she has been relatively normal this afternoon. i said that the other day though and then she was still a nightmare that night! tonight will tell!

bit of a bugger really with her timing cos we were meant to be going to wales this weekend for a 90th birthday party, but we have had to cancel.

anyway.............off to try and get them all into bed early so that i can have some wine and then follow them to bed! ( see! however tired i am , i STILL find time for wine!!)

rainbowdays · 13/03/2009 21:18

Chooster - Jak is much better now, he is back to eating better and getting his energy back. I have difficulties finding anything that my ds is better than dd at! She is a good all-rounder, ballet, football, music and academically, she is very liked by all she meets. Whereas ds is not great at physical tasks, average academically and due to having intermittent hearing problems is more of a loner, rather than a social lad. Still he is still able to hold the "I am older than you" card with her!!!!
Sorry to hear that job situation is a bit stressful for you and dh at the moment, I hope you manage to work it out.

Greedy - nope, dd is not at reception yet, I do send her to a playschool, but what she is learning is from her pestering me to help her. Whenever ds1 has homework, she wants homework too!!!!! Sorry to hear that Marcy is still poorly, I hope you enjoy your wine tonight and you get some sleep too.

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minxi · 14/03/2009 09:03

Hello girls...have finally added pics! Just couldn't get round to it with so many visitors...
Anyway all is fabulous, loving being a third time mum and dare I say it - could actually do this all again, now I know what this 2 to 3 then 3 to 4 lark is all about, possibly because the older ones are 8 and 5.5 its even more relaxed than the first two times!
Lewis is a star and just sleeps and eats like my eldest son did, so its just lovely!
Anyway hope everyone okay - promise to catch up soon... excuse us in our pj's! x

fettle · 14/03/2009 14:31

Minxi. Beautiful!!!! Almost broody! You make it sound so easy!!!

xxx

rainbowdays · 14/03/2009 21:12

AAWWWW, Minxi, the pictures are fabulous. Made me even more broody than I already am (if that is possible ) I agree, going from 2 to 3 is so easy, I have not got as big a gap as you , but I am definitely finding dc3 easier and I am more relaxed about him. Hence why I am going in the madness of ttc#4!!!! All three of your sons look wonderful too.

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greedygreedyguzzler · 15/03/2009 10:09

lovely pics minxi!
am the only one that has found going from 2 to 3 the hardest? would have said it was easy for the first 10 months or so and then once she was on the move it became much harder. i think i am in the minority!

Chooster · 15/03/2009 22:42

Aw minxi they are all gorgeous! You look pretty fab yourself too . It kind of makes me a bit broody too, and I thought I was over all that!! My cousin had her little one this morning - a girl called Polly. Babies babies everywhere!!! .

RahRah1 · 16/03/2009 12:58

Hello all..

Many congratulations MINXI, he is absolutely gorgeous!!!! Wow 3 boys!

I hope you don't mind me coming to join you after such a long time. I'm 26 weeks this week (Thursday).

Last scan I had at 24 weeks my little girl was 1lb 6 and all looked well with placenta, blood flow, fluids, cervix etc.... so hopefully will be going a lot further this time.

First question: Movements... my consultant said that I should feel 10 movements between waking up and 4pm. Is that 10 separate movements or 10 movements all together. Any tips for counting movements? He said he feels its quite important for me to do it as it may indicate a problem and then I can go straight to his unit.

Can anyone give me a brief update on how everyone is and what they are up to.. the tread is massive!

Love Rah Xxxx

Ready · 16/03/2009 14:53

Minxi WOW. Utterly gorgeous. You look amazing too Go girl!! How is it all going?

How's everyone doing?

I am 23+4, due 9th July.

Bodkin · 16/03/2009 20:20

Hey all

Congrats Minxi - lovely pictures - your 2 older boys look pleased as punch with their little bro!

Rah - so glad to hear it's all sounding positive for you. Hmm, that is a bit confusing what your consultant said. Am sure someone here will be able to clarify...

Greedy - hope Marcy's feeling better. It's grim when they sleep badly. Isla's been rubbish since she was ill at Christmas. We are back to giving her a bottle of milk at night (path of least resistance) most nights. Grrrrr. Marcy's doing well with her teeth! There's still no sign of a canine in Isla's gob.

Fettle - sorry to hear about your DH having to go up North, followed by Afghanistan. and sorry to hear you had such a hard time with the coil. I have the copper coil (non-hormone). It's been fine, but recently my periods have started to get longer and longer (10 days+) so am not sure whether I want to carry on with it. Mind you, they were like that before i first went on the pill 13 years ago, so maybe it's me!

MrsMc - sounds like this pregnancy is being quite a tricky customer. Hope you are managing to get the odd daytime nap in when Xavier naps.

Ready - great to see you back and hear you are enjoying the pregnancy!

Hi Chooster and Honey!

Hi Rainbow - no advice on the sibling thing I'm afraid...although it may be something I have to deal with eventually... DD2 seems to grasp things very easily and is much more physically co-ordinated than DD1 was at this age. I guess also younger ones do tend to learn so much off their siblings that it is inevitable they will catch them up pretty quickly.

Hi everyone else! Not much else to report here.

greedygreedyguzzler · 17/03/2009 11:51

hello all!

marcys hand foot and mouth disease is all gone! (have i said that already?) and we are all happy bunnies here again....................apart from my first patient didnt turn up and dint let me know so i am sitting here like a lemon with nothing to do but play on the computer!!!

anyway! nice to see you rah and ready!
rah - i would say he means 10 lots of movements. so if she squirms and wriggles for a minute or so count that as 1 movement not lots of movements , and then if there is a little gap and more movement count that as a separate movement. it is a really easy thing to get hung up on and to worry about and especially in your case. from experience i would say that all babies are different anyway, my ds didnt wriggle much at all whereas both my dds never stopped moving!! if you are ever worried you arent feeling enough movements though just go and get checked out straight away to put your mind at rest. how are you feeling anyway? are you blooming?

how about you ready? i bet you are blooming arent you?

Chooster · 17/03/2009 12:19

I would agree with Greedy, it would be 10 seperate 'blocks' of movement in a day. If you're worried, drink some iced water and lie down and relax for a few mins. I found this the best way to get DS 2 to do a little wriggle for me!

Good to hear from you again bodders. All sounds good for you! We may have a similar issue situation with my DS's. Theo is much bigger / sturdier than Max and he's much more into rough play. I have a feeling it will be Theo sticking up for Max at school rather than the other way round . But it will be tricky for Max as there is a 3 yr difference between them. Rainbow - I'm sure over time there will definately be something that DS1 can do that is better than DD, maybe he just hasn't found his main strengths yet . I'm sure you already do this but in the meantime is there anything you can ask for his help with that only he can do because he's taller / older. How old are your bigger 2 Rainbow? I forget.

Glad Marcy is better Greeds! I didn't realise she had HF&M.

iamamummy · 17/03/2009 16:54

hi ladies

minxi your ds is scrummy!!!! your family looks very happy. i hope you are recovering well and getting lots of rest - well as much as possible

ready and rah - so lovely to hear from you cant believe how quickly your pregnancys have flown!

hellos to everyone else not much time to post as feeling utterly shattered from doing night shifts.

morning sickness kicked in big time this morning at 12+1. still no scan date as yet but i have been referred to see a consultant as i had a PPH with ds.

can i ask you experienced ladies a question - when ds was born i had quite a bad 2nd degree tear and i am aware of lots of scarring and etc internally. he was quite a big baby too at 8lb 13oz. i know second babies are generally bigger. did any of you have worse tears second time round? do you think i will be likely to tear the scar tissue and possibly have a worse tear? or will i be more stretchy as i have done it before? i am asking because i really want to try for a homebirth again but slightly concerned of seriousness of tearing and PPH. i have discussed this with the mw and she was all for a HB and said 2nd labour shoud be much much easier but i just wanted your expert opinions

love to all xx

fettle · 17/03/2009 18:00

HI all

Great to hear from you Rah and Ready!! FAbulous to hear all is well with you and bumps. AGree with the movement monitors assessment too!

Bodders - good t hear from you as well! Isla's not got canines yet? Toby has all bar his back molars and has done for ages! DD already has her first adult tooth growing through and a loose one at the front - she's only 4! She's growing up too quickly! Bras, boobs and periods here we come......!

Iammummy - can't help with the tearing question - definitely seems easier 2nd time around, but in my case I had DD 4 weeks early and Toby had an enormous! head so I needed an epiostomy with him to stop me tearing whereas had no tears or anything with DD!

Best go and get the DC in the bath, but just wanted to pop on briefly to say that my friend who had a stillbirth at 36 weeks last year (I don't know if you remember?) anyway, she had a healthy baby girl last night - so happy for her!. After 2 mc and a stillbirth she deserved some good news!

love to all
xxx

rainbowdays · 17/03/2009 18:38

Rah - hey great to have you with us here. So excited that you are getting further along. Every day is a big bonus we know.
As for the kicks thing, it is a common request for a kick chart to be made, even in pregnancies without any issues.

There is a page about it in the Dr Miriam Stoppard "conception, pregnancy and birth" book. Some extracts from that are:"your baby will feel and be more active on some days than others, but her daily pattern of movements will become more consistent after about week 28. ... There are several ways of counting fetal movements and your antenatal clinic may give you their own "kick-chart" to fill in. .... Each day starting at 9am, count the number of fetal movements until they reach ten, then mark the tenth movement on your chart. however if the number of movements is less than ten by 9pm, fill in the actual number of movements" However, in your situation this would mean a trip to visit to check the baby out. I had a few days when I did have an unusually quiet baby and each time the midwives were able to check the baby out, and it was always ok. But it can indicate failure of the placenta if the baby goes quiet so they do need to listen to baby heartrate etc, if there is any concern.

It is difficult to count the movments when they are squirming I found! In terms of movements another extract from the book is:" your baby's movements - which include kicking, pushing, punching, squirming, and turning somersaults... will steadily increase as she grows reaching their maximum between weeks 30 and 32. The number of movements can range from about 100 to 700 over a period of several days.... on average, most women can feel around nine out of every ten of their baby's movements, although for some women the proportion is only six out of every ten.... whether you feel a movement or not depends on its direction and strength, and the position your baby is in when she makes it. " "If you feel her moving she may, for instance, be shifting her position because she feels like a change, or because you are sitting or lying in a potition that causes her discomfort. Or she may be trying to relocate the thumb that she had been happily sucking before she decided on a change of position." So counting an incident of movements is the way to think of it. One funny thing I found to get my Jak kicking was to rock in my sister's rocking chair!!!!! With my dd it was going somewhere noisy!!!!! Different children, different tactics!

"if you notice any significant change in your baby's movements .... contact your doctor or the hospital. If you don't feel any movements at all in one day, contact your doctor or hospital immediately. Even if your baby's movements seem to have ceased altogether, don't panic. Your doctor can quickly assess your baby with ultrasound and electronic fetal monitoring and decide whether any intervention is necessary."

It is important to note any change in movement pattern more than how you actually do it. Once the baby has had a good wriggle at one point they will often settle down for a sleep and it may be quite some time before you get another jab to remind you they are there! There are ways to get them moving, laying down and drinking icecold drink often serves the trick.

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rainbowdays · 17/03/2009 18:56

iamamummy - I had second degree tear with ds1, but dd was about 9oz lighter and I still got a 2nd degree tear with her, but it was along the same tear line the midwife told me. Then with Jak who was 2 lbs HEAVIER I got no tear at all!!!!! I did use EPO prior to Jak birth as I had heard that it softens up the cervix. Whether this was the cause of a much better birth despite much heavier baby I don't know. Or whether it was because it was a homebirth?!?!?! I guess it is one of these things that you will not be able to predict. But I would definitely advice go for homebirth again if you can!

Ready - so good to have you back with us too. You are working at the momentment still aren't you? When will you plan stopping?

Fettle - I remember when your friend lost the baby, such good news to hear that she has a lovely baby girl now.

Well got to go get children into bed now.... catch up again soon.

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iamamummy · 17/03/2009 19:17

thanks rainbowdays - when you say EPO was that for perineal massage? and when did you start using it? i am pretty certain i shall go for a homebirth again although it does depend on the consultants ok on monday.

iamamummy · 17/03/2009 19:20

fettle - huge congratulations to your friend, how wonderful after all of that sad news to finally have her little baby. sorry to hear your dh is off to afghanistan and now working away from home too. i dont know how you cope, if my dp is away for a day we are both on the phone constantly to each other - maybe we are just needy

Chooster · 17/03/2009 20:29

Great news fettle!!!! Thats a lovely outcome for your friend . Hopefully that will help with some of her memories.

I never had a tear with either of the boys so I can't really help - homebirth sounds fab though again! Can't believe you are so far on .

rainbowdays · 18/03/2009 10:57

Iam - I found a link previously on mn, but can't find it again, this is fairly much what I remember quoted from others here "Taking EPO encourages your cervix to do thses things, it is also good for softening the perineum as it makes things stretchy, so less likely to tear.
Recommendations are to take 1/2 capsules orally 2/3 times daily and 1/2 capsules vaginally of an evening, put it in and up before you go to bed and it will melt away inside you, like a pessary would.
Get pure EPO though, not ones with added vitamin A, it should be vitamin E." and "Evening primrose oil is an excellent source of prostaglandins, which prepare your cervix for labour. It can be taken orally as soon as 34 weeks, and can be applied directly to the cervix at 36 weeks. The general recommendation is two 500mg capsules per day until week 38, at which time you increase to 3-4 per day. Applying directly to the cervix is optimal, but the beneficial ingredients are absorbed through the external skin of the stomach as well." I definitely think it made a difference for me. I had been having contractions for weeks but cervix not doing anything. Took the epo 3 capsules orally and one vaginally at night the following day I got massive show, took it again the following night and gave birth the following day!!!! I think it worked to soften my cervix AND made the perineum more stretchy, hence the lack of tearing. I think it is worth a go. I would definitely use it again, if I was pg again.

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