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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

HIV test in pregnancy

101 replies

Forafriend · 16/03/2005 19:07

Am pregnant with no.3 and about to have my booking in bloods. Declined HIV test with DD2 - wasnt offered with DD1. IS it possible to have 2 healthy breastfed DD's, have been with DH (and faithful) for 8 years, we are both healthy .... could i have it and not know???
I did have a couple of partners before DH who i didnt know their sexual history totally (but then who does??)
Am i just panicing at the thought?? Or is it possible??

OP posts:

spagblog · 16/03/2005 19:10

Why decline it?
I took it and then was offered it again with DS. I asked the MV why bother and she said that since I had ventouse with DD that it was classed as a risk!

logic · 16/03/2005 19:11

I don't know, forafriend, but I just agreed to the test both times (even though I knew I couldn't be +) on the grounds that if everybody accepted it as routine then there would be no stigma attached to it. That way, the people who did have it would be picked up early.

Original poster

Forafriend · 16/03/2005 19:13

I suppose the thought of finding out i had it was too awful to contemplate ... And was told you didnt HAVE to have the test

OP posts:

aloha · 16/03/2005 19:16

You are panicking for no reason - honestly you are! However, I think this kind of panic is totally normal. I felt it, there are several threads on Mumsnet about it and friends of mine have also felt it. It's irrational but really common. I will give you my house if you are HIV+! You would certainly know by now if you had it, and it is really, really rare with non-drug using women who haven't been in Africa. You can decline the test if you want, but I found it wonderfully liberating to have all the tests and have them come back clear. I felt all clean and shiny and new!

Socci · 16/03/2005 19:16

Message withdrawn

logic · 16/03/2005 19:18

Absolutely, no-one can force you to have it. I just didn't see it as a big deal. I think I would want to know if I did have it though because if picked up early, they can stop the baby from getting it. No point in worrying about it though, it's not good for either of you

Original poster

Forafriend · 16/03/2005 19:19

Thanks Aloha!!! I think it is my pregnancy hormones!!!! I am worrying about everything. Silly thing is i never worryed with DD's 1 and 2!!!! I am focusing all my thoughts on a one night stand i had BEFORE i met DH and feeling guilty about having unprotected sex!!! Everyone i slept with before that (not many) i know their sexual history. I still see the one night stand bloke around and about ... i am sure he is a normal healthy guy!

OP posts:

Tinker · 16/03/2005 19:20

I felt exactly the same panic when I had mine. But thought that the only reasons to not have it were selfish ones. It is wonderfully liberating to get that negative. Better to know now and be treated.

Original poster

Forafriend · 16/03/2005 19:20

I keep thinking that if i had it i would know!!! Surely -DD2 was BF for 2 years and very healthy

OP posts:

Socci · 16/03/2005 19:21

Message withdrawn

aloha · 16/03/2005 19:22

Yes, you would know. But I'd still advise having the test, because it will come back negative and you will feel fantastic!

lunavix · 16/03/2005 19:22

I think the major point for having it is if you do (god forbid) they can work miracles so your lo doesn't get it too.

Twiglett · 16/03/2005 19:30

well put Aloha .. I was petrified with first pregnancy and the HIV test (anyone who has ever had unprotected sex with anyone would be, its not you or your partner, its all the people they might have slept with and all the people they in turn might have slept with) .. and when it came bck negative "I felt all clean and shiny and new!" too

also had one in 2nd pg despite only ever having slept with my DH in between the 2

WideWebWitch · 16/03/2005 19:59

I asked NOT to have it (scared, silly I know) and they accidentally tested me anyway so it was a relief when it was negative. I do know the scary feeling, totally normal.

PiccadillyCircus · 16/03/2005 20:03

I can't remember if I had the test with DS or not . So will probably have it with this one so I can also feel shiny and new

zubb · 16/03/2005 20:04

I was scared of getting the result with ds1, but thought it better to find out if I did have - like you the fear was based on something long ago. I had the test with ds2 and now in this pregnancy as well - though why they bother with 3 in 4 years is beyond me, think it's just easier to test for everything when they take the blood.

zippy539 · 16/03/2005 20:43

I was dreading it too after a couple of v stupid encounters in my youth . I didn't realise it was voluntary and probably would have refused it if I had known but I am SO glad I had it - definately feel shiny and brand new (and in a weird way makes me feel better about those dodgy one night stands - I've come over all 'born again virgin' ).

I would say grit your teeth and go for it.

dinny · 16/03/2005 21:07

Forafriend, I was totally terrified with my first pg - felt like declining but didn't as if I was the bub would need protecting. So, know am neg but I'd NEVER have been tested if not for sake of my unborn child. Pathetic or what? Don't worry, you'll be fine. My mw the first pg said all the women she'd dealt with who tested + knew deep down they'd be positive. It's sooooo scary though. Hugs to you.

norash40 · 16/03/2005 21:47

Aloha which planet are you living on. I know there might be an epidemic in Africa, but that does not mean that that is the only place that HIV is on the rise. Look for info on HIV in the UK, you will be surprised. Do you think the air in Africa is HIV polluted? is HIV airborne? Is there something you know about it that maybe the scientists have missed?

I think that the information you posted is highly inaccurate as people have beeen known to live with HIV for more than 15 years. Please get your facts right before you post such inaccurate information on such a serious matter.

Oh and by the way I am African and HIV Negative. OOOOhhhhhh I wonder how that could be possible.

ionesmum · 16/03/2005 22:14

forafriend, I had the test too and it did feel good to be able to know for sure that I was okay. Do you have smear tests? It's no different IMO, except you have the added bonus of knowing your little ones are okay too.

However, having been tested during my prengancy with dd1, I was really annoyed to find I'd been tested again with dd2 even though I'd declined it. Apart from anything else, dd1 was only 18 mo old!

Gwenick · 16/03/2005 22:19

and it is really, really rare with non-drug using women who haven't been in Africa.

Well that's must mean that my test during pg was wrong then - I've been in Africa - lived there for 2 1/2yrs - and while I was there used plenty of drugs (all 'soft' ones honest!)

sparklymieow · 16/03/2005 22:27

I didn't have the test, purely because I was scared to, silly really, Dh was my third partner and my first bf had lost his cherry to a virgin so I knew I would be ok there, second one was a silly little thing where we just had sex, and was also protected, and then DH. Also i have been with DH for 10 years this year so I figured I would have known about by now. Wish I had now, just so I could feel "shiny and new"

norash40 · 16/03/2005 22:46

Hey Gwenick I suppose we better get ourselves retested then ey!

mummytosteven · 16/03/2005 22:48

curious as to spagblog's comment that a ventouse delivery is classed as an HIV risk.

Anyone got any more info on this?

Gwenick · 16/03/2005 22:51

norash - I guess so!! Haven't slept with many guys - 4 including DH - but they' were ALL african - and all lived in Africa

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