The sequel - Fab, Sparkly & often Moany 40 + : Preggie or New Mums - come say Hi!

[jeanjeannie]

We've now filled up the last thread - and the two before that! Seems that there are a lot of us old girls out there getting ourselves into trouble

So - if you've just found yourself to be with child or have a LO and you've hit (or about to hit - we'll let you sneak in just under the radar!)the big 4 0, then come say Hi!

There is always a spare comfy chair - plenty of cake and many old ladies to listen to your moans! Think of the lovely ladies knitting shreddies - only we're not sporting a blue rinse, but wearing cashmere and kitten heels

Hello regular ladies. I avoided putting FAT, F*cked or Knackered in the title - tempting as it was

mornion tee so, you gonna find out the sex of the baby??

/blocks ears

btw what's a paci?

oh hang on - a pacifier?

Come here mrsboogie so I can smack you! And yes, a pacifier, which I have always called a binky or a dummy, but paci seems to be the word these days!

Dummy.

Not you, MrsB, I mean that's a pacifier.

We definitely DO NOT want to know the babe's sex but the radiographer at my sister's 20wk scan basically forced the info on her so we'll have to have it tattoed DO NOT TELL US THE SEX on our foreheads to be sure. I like it being 'the baby' until it comes out - because if I knew it was a girl, eg. I might start thinking of her by name, imagining all sorts of things about her etc. - instead of the babe bringing his/her personality with him/her at birth and during the next few days.

But other people want to know for all sorts of reasons; it's a very personal call. The oddest thing is when one parent wants to know and the other doesn't, so has to keep a secret for months! Whether or not you know, I think it's best for both parents to be in the same position.

oh god - I don't know how one person could keep that a secret from their partner, you would have to always remember not to say "he" or "she" instead of "the baby" . I'd let it slip I would!

It is indeed a personal choice - I wanted to find out cos I would love a girl and was worried I would build up a picture of a potential little girl in my mind for 9 months - I wanted to know so that I could be happy either way. Not that I wouldn't be happy so long as whatever it was was ok of course. That doesn't really make sense - I think I will give up trying to explain!!

The nhs sonographer never offered to tell us though - the sex was never mentioned - I thought the nhs had a policy of not telling these days?

Re dummies - I use one and its great - Darragh doesn't rely on it much at all - he will only take it if he is feeling v tired and grumpy as a comforter which then allows him to fall asleep quickly rather than crying for the sake of it. Otherwise he isn't interested in it.

hedgepig pops her head out from under a pile of leaves.....................are you finding out the sex of the baby Tee???....................she rolls up in a protective ball and hides back under the leaves

Afternoon all......resists tempatation to ask if tee* is going to find out the sex of her baby

We never wanted to know the sex as there are so few surprises in life. Plus you can always paint the nursery neutral and go all out for pink or blue stuff later!

Never went down the dummy route either....couldn't get it to stay in - no matter how hard we pushed

Like ermintrude I've not been able to listen about that poor baby. Seems to me that it's very odd that Harringay are in the firing line again. Makes you wonder who's in charge and how well it's all managed. I also wonder how protected some of these social workers feel - or how much pressure they really pile on to the no-hope families. I think boxes are often ticked on easy cases.

Talking of no hope famlies- I've just got back from a playgroup and the tattooed, teenage mums are feeding 3 month olds cake! AND I saw it for myself - a tiny baby with cola in its bottle No wonder Jamie Oliver has a tough time clearing up the mess 20 years down the line.

jw hope MW visit goes well. And that I'm a celeb line up is shocking - really haven't got a clue who most of them are! Mind you - we don't watch it - not on DPs radar!

I think most people find out what they're having these days and not finding out seems to be the trend of the minority. I'm all for minority though so well done Tee. I couldn't wait to find out though as I didn't get to find out on my first 3 (twas not an option back in the days of ye olde scan). If my DH really hadn't wanted to know, I'd not konw either otherwise I would end up telling him (even if it was to spite him during an argument )

K doesn't have a dummy as much as I tried and tried to get her to accept it. No way will she have it in her mouth - she gags. Ah well at least I don't have to try and wean her off it in a couple of years time.

MW just been and gone. K did an hour off her O2 and that's the routine for the next couple of days. Saturday, all being well, she goes to 2 hours. She coped well. In fact she didn't notice it was gone! I must say I'm a bit scared now that all manner of breathing apparatus is going from her face. I've hardly seen her face without tubes/wires on it.....ooh eerrrrrr

JW great news about the O2! I would probably be scared as well. But its so wonderful that she's doing so well!

And I haven't decided about the sex thing. Knowing me, I'll want to know!

And smacks to all of you wiseasses who asked!

awww brilliant jw I suppose that's the idea - wean her off so slowly that she doesn't notice its gone. Great that its working!

omfg jj feeding cake to a three month old? how do they even manage to eat it? if we try to give D a half a spoon of gripewater he gags and chokes like he's about to expire! and worse than cake - giving them coke, oh yuk, yuk, yuk .

I was watching one of those horrorshows about some American chaps who weigh half a ton and there was one bloke who was trying to lose half his 65 stone weight - it showed his daughter with her 5 month old baby and she was feeding it from a huge quarter pounder burger held up to its face and the child was actually attempting to gnaw bits of the thing off!

Speaking of scrote mothers I see the Shannon Matthews case has begun. I really can't believe that someone would be so stupid as to think that plan would work!

Awwww JW that's good news about the O2 (want to say that in a Sean Bean voice!) and now you'll get to pinch more of her rosy cheeks And just think how better off your back will be without that stylish, over-the-shoulder oxygen tank

Oh mrsB these babies get it stuffed back in their mouths until they swallow

I was just hearing about that poor Shannon Matthews. Scrote parents indeed. I remember hearing when she was missing that people / teachers were saying that she was unhappy at home. Poor kid - that family need a slap and carting off to Outer Mongolia....mind you - isn't that near where Ladymac's son is?! Not fair to inflict them on anyone quite honestly.

Off to read the Daily Mail AND the Telegraph...hurrumph.....fume

Good Afternoon

Tee - Congratulations to you and MrTee (giggling as I write that and I now have a picture of Tee's husband in my mind!). Your post really made me smile - your american-ness came shining through. Can I be the first to ask - have you thought about finding out about the sex? [lilibet ducks!]

I have had a visit to the EPU this morning as the bit of dischrge that I was seeing when I wiped myself (sorry!) was getting more and I was finding dark red clots, albeit small ones. They scanned me and found a blob! No heartbeat but there probably wouldn't be one at this stage anyway. I have to go back next Friday, which seems an age off, when there will either be a heatbeat or nothing . I'm still bleeding, and there is nothing they can do about that.

And I've started feeling really sick, which is a good sgn

So, if you were me, would you keep my hard won appointment at the drs tomorrow?

well, if you feel up to it and nothing has changed by the morning maybe you should keep the app lilibet nothing to lose really.

how many weeks are you again? I had bleeding - similar dark red/brown and couldn't see a heartbeat 'til 8 weeks but all was ok. They say if its dark coloured its probably old blood - and therefore not a worry but you probably know that. I know how stressful it is though [hugs]

Hi lilibet gosh the bleeding is stressful isn't it.

With both Iris and Verity I bled to the point of haemorrhage I was in a restaurant the first time....awful. I was admitted to hospital both times and I just bled literally everwhere (sorry if TMI) Anyway upshot was all was fine - no pains and sometimes these things happen - esecially just after when your period would be.

Might as well go to the docs....you fought for it, might as well use it! I shall keep everything crossed for you

Thanks both of you, yes it's still quite dark and thick iykwim (yeurch!!).

The only good thing about all this is that dh is feeling so sorry for me he has come round to my boy's name . Told him that I am not talking babies again until after I have seen a heartbeat, unless of course he would like to come round to my girl's names!!

I'm about 6 weeks now - I have only been on this thread a fortnight - how is that?? I feel like I have kown you ladies for a very long time

lilibet we have that effect on everyone

EVIL EMOTICON

lilibet I reckon your DH liked your boy's name all along!

I know - a fortnight here in MNland....bobbing along with us forty-somethings does feel like a very, very long time Or perhaps you've been here so long with us...that we're really now all fifty-something.....

Oh lordy, lordy - give me a big ra-ra and a 'you can do it' only I've just realised it's weaning in a couple of weeks (oh, not another mouth to feed emoticon)

Just looked at the weaning thread. I think I'm clearly out of fashion as I'm still planning the puree route and not this new fangled Baby Led Weaning. Yeah - I may shove a whole banana down her....I may not! I actually found the Annabel Karmel book helpful - not that I can't cook - I can (and quite well too, even if I say so myself) but I just run out of ideas. Well, that's my eve sorted....me and Annabel in perfect harmony Pureed parsnip anyone?!

if you are six weeks lilibet then your period might have been due around this time? I bled every four weeks during the second, third and fourth month. Even though it was old blood thing it still drove me mad with fretting and is the reason why I was so superstitious about not buying anything till the very end.

what's baby led weaning dare I ask jj ?

lilibet ((big hug)) I bled with Oliver at 7wks & 8 weeks amd then at 12wks (just after the dating scan) and worried myself stupid. Fingeres crossed it will be OK.
This thread is rather addictive I am finding )(and lovely too) but I have been out in the real word to baby massage today, Oliver grizzed through the whole thing I think he may be getting a cold ekkk.

baby led weaning as far as I can make out is you give the baby big chunks of food and hope they don't choke (I'm sure it is more complicated than that ) I will be doing puree, I have lots of lovely little pots for freezing food up the loft and need to get a 2nd use out of them.

aaaahh so that's what the scrote mothers shoving cake in and the large American lady feeding the 5 month old a quarter pounder are doing

I'd be very keen on feeding baby the same food as everyone else is eating but pureed (unless its pizza or chicken vindaloo or something). Surely they need to learn how to chew and swallow etc before you start giving them steak and chips?

ah another made up affair! Baby led feeding! How can a baby chew food if they have no back teeth?? It cannot possibly be right.

I'm sticking with what worked for my 3 over 17 years ago...........baby rice, then pureed veg/fruit, toast & marmite, weetabix with milk etc etc. It aint broke so I aint fixing it.

Christ, I feel like I haven't stopped today - perhaps because I haven't. DH is still laid up, MW came, orders to process, Katherine awake most of the day so squeezing everything else in. Off to drop DSS at cubs soon. I'm ready for a lie down Actually, I couldn't get off to sleep last night....think I got a bit overtired. Missed my Ovaltine though so will have some tonight.

I'm liking Deirdre Langton/Barlow/Rasheed's painting's

Awww hedgepig Iris used to loathe baby massage! All the other LOs would be cooing and she'd do her nut

Baby Led Weaning - or BLW (not to be confused with a BLT grin]) is as hedgepig says - it's giving chunks of food and rejecting all mashed or puree stuff

It gets very heated over in the weaning message board. It's all the rage!! Some MN bigwig has a website dedicated to it and she is held in high esteem as the BLW guru. Can't really see what's so great about giving hunks of food to toothless babies..? Perhaps I'm missing the point.

Also- purees give such a concentrated taste that I think you can get across more variety that way. Anyway - what do I know? I detest the word 'weaning' !

Neither of mine were madly keen on the pureed butternut squash, broccoli etc. (although stewed fruit or mashed banana always went down and stayed down). But as soon as I put a teeny roast chicken dinner into the braun mixer thingy they were madferit. So much easier to give them what you're having - and makes you cook healthier stuff too, no added salt and all that.

BLF WTF? I can't imagine giving them chunks of food when they've no back teeth and have been used to milk thus far. I bet humans in caves used to just chew up whatever they were having and feed the babe like a bird. They would't have just passed over a leg of hairy mammoth and told the infant to get on with it. Not that I have knowledge whatsoever, but I just bet you