The sequel - Fab, Sparkly & often Moany 40 + : Preggie or New Mums - come say Hi!

[jeanjeannie]

We've now filled up the last thread - and the two before that! Seems that there are a lot of us old girls out there getting ourselves into trouble

So - if you've just found yourself to be with child or have a LO and you've hit (or about to hit - we'll let you sneak in just under the radar!)the big 4 0, then come say Hi!

There is always a spare comfy chair - plenty of cake and many old ladies to listen to your moans! Think of the lovely ladies knitting shreddies - only we're not sporting a blue rinse, but wearing cashmere and kitten heels

Hello regular ladies. I avoided putting FAT, F*cked or Knackered in the title - tempting as it was

When I started this internet dating malarky, I always said I'd never meet anyone who already had children (I'd just come out of a 2 year relationship with a man who had 2 teenagers and to say it was hell on earth at the end, would be a gross understatement). Anyhoo, here I am, married to a man who has his son living with him most of the time.

I think parenting itself is very hard at the best of times but step parenting is something else completely. Most of the time it's more thankless than being a birth parent. But, I knew all of this when I met him, married him etc so I cannot grumble oh, and I'm not actually grumbling as DSS is a love and I know is very fond of me and I of him Sometimes to the point where he'd rather have me than his dad. That's about the best compliment you can have I suppose?

JJ stopping/starting your wee mid flow has always been a good exercise down there and when I used to drink, an excellent party piece (j/k)

Saw a baby being born on BBC1 the other night. Usualy sends me into floods of maternal tears seeing a new, fresh one coming out but this time, nothing. Nada. Nowt. So guess it's menopause here I come

Forgot to mention about the vicky pollard character - she also smokes roll ups and has a tattoo declaring her undying love to my DH with their initials saying 'forever'. On her breast naturally. Hmm that won't come off will it? I hope this sets the imagery nicely

Happy birthday Iris xxxx

ladymac I actually grew up in Westport, not far from Darien, so I know where that is!

If all goes to plan, we'll be in Berkely for the holidays in 2009, baby in tow!

And I've promised OH drive across the Golden Gate, because he's seen it, but never been on it!

Good Morning all and a very Happy Birthday to Iris xx

I thnk that my dh was incredibly brave taking on three stepchildren, he was in his late twenties and the children were then 13, 9 and 5.

He was always wonderful with them all but certain things have stuck in my mind over the years, ds1 at about age 12 asking him about wet dreams and then about a year or so after that watching him teaching him how to shave, dd going into his office when she was about 16 to show him a dress she had just bought from Jane Norman in the sales and him and ds2 have always been very cuddly and he still snuggles up with him now at almost 12. He read all of the Chronicles of Narnia to him as a bedtime story. It took him ages .

Their Dad never wants to see them on Christmas day , I always offer, he has always refused. He really is a T**t.

So, sat nav is sorted , packed lunch is made and we should be arriving in Bucks at around 1.55. See you all then x

johnworf - wht sort of parties did you used to go to where that was your party piece? My dh can wiggle his ears but he would look very boring compared to you!!

lilibet haha. The type of party where keys get shoved in the bowl in the living room

Your DH sounds fab. And I totally agree he's done a great job if your children have been able to get so close with him Love the Chronicles of Narnia myself but I had to read them all to myself when I was a kid...but, talking of which, I'm joining the libary today for Katherine War and Peace it is then!

Reminds me of the Victoria Wood joke about going to a party where everyone put their keys in a bowl on the coffee table. She said she never found out what happened to her moped but she drove that Peugot for years...

hahahahahahaha!

mornin all

gosh you lot have been chatty!

I have caught OH's cold - out of guilt he did all the feeds last night
Interstingly he reckons several of the knowledgeable women at work told him that he probably caught his cold from the LO - how can this be if the LO hasn't been ill?

off to catch up on the chat

mrsb so sorry you've ended up with the dreaded lurgy. At least your lovely OH is helping with LO so you get to rest ((hug))

Dunno about getting it off Darragh. Sounds slightly made up to me The little fella hasn't even been ill! Not sure how he could lay out dad AND mum and still not be affected.

DH and DSS are off swimming this afternoon thereby leaving me to do a bit of online retail therapy. I'm in need I think (don't need much of an excuse ...does anyone?!) Yesterday workwise was frantic and I think it's going to be like this until after Christmas. I really cannot complain though as it's my living. I'm thinking of roping in DS#2 as a Santa's helper over xmas. What is the going minimum wage these days for a 17yo?

Sent DH to M&S this morning with the suit K was given y'day by his brother and SiL. Turns out to be worth £3! Stingy rellies or what?! Anyway, DH said he felt a right chump accepting a voucher for £3 (I was hoping for a new bra with the proceeds. Good job he'd not already picked one up for me!).

What do you do for a living johnworf?

I'm self employed. I sell designer perfume/skincare etc on both Ebay shop and my website

Pays the some of the bills I guess, and keeps me off the streets!

God I would love to make my living doing that jw but I would never have the guts - would be terrified I wouldn't make enough to pay the mortgage/bills. Do you have to keep all your stock in a room in your house? That would be another problem for me - nowhere to keep stuff.

mrsb we've had our loft converted (semi converted - might get a velux window put in some time in the future).

Yeah I guess you've got to be a bit barking to do what I did - phoned my boss one day and said 'I'm leaving'. Knew it was now or never. Worked my notice and here I am. Some said it wouldn't work - new business AND spending all day with my DH.....you also have to have a certain amount of self discipline otherwise you've be sat watching Loose Women and Jezza Kyle all day. In the beginning it was a huge switch but I love it now Obviously don't miss all the office politics and the back biting but sometimes miss the interaction...then I just email old colleagues and get the low down on who has been fired and who is doing who (offices are the same worldwide!!)

It is uncertain, escpecially in current economic climate, and at first the thought of no regular income was very scary. However, when business is good and you're flying, the money is in your pocket and you can work around the kids (ok, last xmas till early hours of the morning), it has it's benefits. I remember when I worked when my oldest was very little and I'd dread that call from the nursery to say she was ill and could I come. Just remember the crap you'd get from your line manager and this time around I know that it'll be different.

So, it's pro's and con's like all work

You feeling any better mrsb?

Evening all......we've survived the birthday

Thank - you for your Birthday Greetings for the Princess Precocious Iris!!

Gosh - I'm sort of dreading this party malarky as they get older....hiring hall, goody bags etc, etc....it's exhausting.

Anyway - she had a wail of a time - got very excited at all the presents - then completely lost interest in them all - focusing all her attention on the mouse-shaped balloons! Which, quite frankly have ear likes HUGE breasts. Most disconcerting.

jw ah - internet dating - I said I wouldn't go for a married man...! DP was still married and only divorced by the skin of his teeth when Iris arrived Mind you - can't complain, I met him in the first month of my subscription so didn't have to pay for another

And don't forget, in times of recession sales of lipstick and perfume rocket!! Looks like you could be onto a credit-crisis proof business there jw

mrsB sorry to hear the lurgy has come to visit you

Awwww lilibet your DH sounds a top bloke Struck lucky there!!

tee am sooooo of Berkely. That's where I'd happily skip off to. Driving across that bridge on a sunny day - open top car - ahhhhh, it's a wonder I ever came home!!!

Right - must be bedtime surely? Did I mention Verity woke up every hour from 10.30pm till 6 last night... Next week 'operation sleep patrol' commences.

well jw apart from the lack of guaranteed pay cheque at the end of the month I reckon your pros outweigh your cons by quite some margin! I can see how it might suit the more organised individual like yourself though - I would be watching loose women and then working in the middle of the night

Glad the party went ok jj and the birthday girl had a good time -that party malarky is deffo not something I am looking forward to in the future. What's operation sleep patrol and can we join jj?

We have actually discovered a little sleepy trick - D loves his rocker and falls to sleep in it very easily. Last night we took it upstairs rocked him to sleep then popped him into bed. Worked a treat in avoiding the "I'm not tired, lets get up and go downstairs" kerfuffles that we usually have between 2am and 3am.

Still feeling a bit rough

Been on the phone to my mum this evening - she was telling me I should start giving D a bit of mashed up whatever we are eating, and clearly thinks I am a terrible wuss for adhering so rigidly to the recommended dose of formula to water. My protestations about sugar and salt levels and dehydration etc fell on deaf ears.

just thought - you must be counting your blessings at the moment jw that you are self employed - imagine if you were faced with the prospect of having to go back to an office now and leaving K in some lurgy- ridden nursery?

mrsb it would be virtually impossible for me to leave her with even a child minder. The chronic lung disease leaves her susceptible to any infection and almost certainly would land on her chest. Dread to think of the consequences of that one. Only last week my MW told me of another of her babies (not on O2) that'd gone back to PICU (paediatric ICU). Couldn't face the thought of her landing up on a ventilator again

I don't think people we know and family get the seriousness of it really. And it must be hard if you've never seen a very prem baby nor been on a NICU let alone a SCBU. It's frightening and I have to be careful that I don't wrap her in cotton wool too much. Once she gets over this first winter and she fares it well (fingers crossed) then that's the biggy out of the way. Obviously once she's bigger, stronger, and her immune system builds up, then things will be different

Glad you've found a good little trick to getting LO back to sleep. I remember when my boys were babies driving around at 4am with them in their car seat as it was the only way to get them off. MADNESS! But I do know that if someone said 'stand in a corner, touching your nose with your second toe', you'd try it

Talking of which, JJ I sent sleep thoughts to both of your little girls last night. Hopefully the pardee wore them out and you're languishing in bed as we speak (there's blind optimism for ya!)

mrsb I'm waiting as long as I can on the weaning front. Not because of current guidelines but K's system is so immature that I don't want to overload it. Half of the advice that's printed nowadays is bollocks IMHO. I understand where your mum is coming from in many ways; it worked for her bringing you up and you are perfectly fine If we believed all the hype we'd never do anything. Nanny state at work again. Sigh.

JJ I had 3 months subs on my dating site and nearly didn't meet DH as by that point I'd got fed up of meeting blokes that could see the invisible sign on my forehead which naturally read 'I'm gagging for it'. Anyway DH bucked the trend so he got brownie points and I made him wait a whole 3 weeks before we did the dirty deed! Hah! Almost a lifetime these days

Wow, I must recommend internet dating to my single friend, will tell her of the very high success rate on this thread

jw I'm very impressed you made your DH wait 3 weeks. Did he have to remove your bustle and corsets in order to get at your body?

A belated Happy Birthday to Iris. Glad the party went well jj. Love the sound of the balloons with breasts. Hope you got some sleep last night, you must have been exhausted after throwing a birthday party on the amount of sleep you'd had over the past few weeks. Like mrsb, I'm intrigued to know more about 'operation sleep'. Does it mean you'll be wearing earplugs thus sleeping through any crying?

Try not to be jealous but E is just waking up now! We were at a fireworks party last night and she didn't get to bed till 11 so I was hoping she'd sleep in. Her deafness does have an upside as she was the only small child who wasn't frightened by all the big bangs!

morning I have nothing useful to say apart from uggggggggg I just got a face full of regurgitated baby milk yukkkk - off to have a wash!

hedgepig I hear that milk second time around is very good for wrinkles

ladymac not sure about high success rates. Couldn't vouch for those. Internet dating motto must surely be 'kiss a lot of toads, to find one decent frog' (forget the prince!).

FYI I made him wait 3 weeks by which time he'd found the combination code to my chastity belt This is now back in place btw - code changed

Good Morning one and all.

I'm feeling uber lazy this morning as I haven't gone to church, it's raining here and standing round the senataph in the rain, really didn't appeal to me. Then I started feeling guilty as what's standing in the rain compared with millions who died fighting? We went to the Somme on our way through France a few yers ago and it was incredibly moving, I wept my way round quite a few places but did have to stop and smile when we saw a very large English coach with a sign on the front that said "Derek's Battlefield Tours"

Glad the party went well, JJ.

Good Morning Hedgepig - it's good for the skin you know

I've had a yucky brown discharge for a few days, only a few little smears, so this morning I googled it and the top item on teh search - mumsnet!! Apparently it's normal and I'm fine.

Ermentrude - how's the sickness going? I'm feeling sick but never actually throwing up and everytime dh sympathises, I remind him of you and your wodge of loo rolll and tell him that really I'm having it very easy at the moment.

We have no plans for the rest of the day, dh has a very sore foot and can hardly walk. He has had it before and really needs to see a dr with it. Poor love is in agony .

I feel better now I know that it will get rid of a few wrinkles
Lilibet I had bleeds early on with Oliver and he is here safe and sound try not to get oo stressed. Its sunny here but we haven't made it out of the door yet.

lilibet, stop scaring your poor dh with tales of my pathetic pelvic floor! (also, never ever tell any dh or dp that someone else has it worse. milk that sympathy! ). i've had a tiny bit of discharge too but it's stopped now and all seems fine, in that i am indeed still throwing up and did so yesterday about an hour after eating anything so went to bed feeling appalling. but today i haven't actually barfed, just done a bit of dry heaving.

had your lunch yet, ladies?

i too am v impressed the internet dating success on this thread - a single friend of mine has been doing some speed-dating for arty types after which you key in to your pc for each person: Date, Mate or Collaborate (ie artistically). Three times in a row she just got a few chaps who wanted to be mates with her and is thoroughly depressed. I don't think speed dating can work unless you're gorgeous, confident and therefore unlikely to need speed dating!

ermintrude she's probably looking in the wrong place. Not sure what artistic men are looking for TBH.

Although scratch the surface and they're probably looking for the same things as the average man in the street. Men the world over are all pretty much alike; watch football, stare at huge boobs, scratch their balls when they think no one is looking (or in my DH's case not that bothered ), and enjoy sniffing their own farts (whilst grinning). Those that deny any of these are liars!

Tell her to get a good pic (no cleavage but big smile) and not to put anything in her profile that could be interpreted as 'I'm up for it'. www.match.com, www.datingdirect.co.uk, and www.friendsreuniteddating.co.uk are all good.

well, you described my OH to a t jw