Things they don't tell you before you get pregnant

[AnguaVonUberwald]

I know this has been done before, and that there are lots of bad things they don't tell you before you get pregnant.

But also, everyone goes on about how once you have the baby your life will never be the same again - they don't mention that you will love the baby so much, you will really like the new way, and not mind that everything you once enjoyed about your life has changed, because you have your baby instead.

OK, and then there is:

That you might never get the second trimester energy rush, and in fact might be exhausted all the way through!

That you will get instant attention from the NHS, until you get to 36 weeks pregnant, and then they will ignore you unless you can prove you are in labour (something that is impossible to do)

That you will never see the same midwife twice

That they will make you take home your wee, clean out the tub, and wee in it again a month later!

That late pregnancy brings on insomnia. I'm getting more sleep now with a screaming baby than I did during last 3 months of preganancy.

Bleeding gums.

Heartburn - never had it before pregnancy, I've been keeping gaviscon in profit the last 4 months

That baby can bruise the underside of your ribs.

That the 1st night your baby sleeps through the night, if your brestfeeding you need a crane to lift your boobs off the bed and spend 10 mins hovering over the bath/sink trying get some of the milk out so that it doesn't hurt so bloody much

Midwifes can be horrible when you are in labour .

You can crave weird things and smells like petrol and nail varnish.

You wil cry at stupid things ATM I am crying everytime the hovis advert comes on and the Bette midler album .

You will feel sick at smells .

Twitchy legs arghhhhhhhh.

That peeing in a tiny plastic pot is easier said than done when 36 weeks pregnant.

That you have to take said plastic pot of pee back home with you and wash it out ready for next time!

that your palate can change for good. after nearly 20 years of happy taste-based vegetarianism, i now find myself eating sausages and steaks with gay abandon. i have also eaten + enjoyed maccy d's twice since giving birth

I miss being pregnant I got soooooo much attention!!!!! from colleagues, people in the street, total strangers used to chat to me ....awwwww

nobody told me that pregnancy wasn't glamourous at all.... all beautiful with a big belly and lots of attention....
nope... stay in bed, being sick, having trouble walking, feeling enormous etc etc..

That your feet might be permanently bigger afterwards - longer and wider! Although I've lost all my baby weight and more I'm now a size six shoe minimum (was 5 before) and can't wear any of the shoes I had before becoming pregnant.

That the huge baggy adjustable maternity jeans that you bought at the start may not fit your enormous 7 month arse and you may have to go out and buy more.

Prolapse nice not

That you feel really empty before your internal organs drop down again and then you feel out of kilter when you first try to walk post delivery.

That you'll eat anything in sight one-handed after delivery and not even care it's food you would have previously turned your nose up at.

That your solely bf-baby will cry when you dish up food for yourself - even if they are out of sight but not smelling range of the food.

That your partner will develop the ability to sleep through absolutely anything the moment the baby is born.

That you go from being a fairly reasonable person who doesn't mind standing in bank queues to someone who turns into a Nazi if they have to wait more than 2 minutes in a Post Office queue, and you get annoyed at the older woman in front of you who appears to have thousands of pounds to buy premium bonds but hasn't bought the right documents so that's another five minutes of my time wasted. (And I'm probably paying her state pension out of my national insurance contributions because the government hasn't/can't put enough money aside). And the fact I'm now really worried about everything especially money because I'm self employed and only have enough savings to take five months off!!!

needmorecake - yes, it's amazing how quickly DP's light sleeping/insomnia has disappeared now that the baby is here! Mind you, so has mine

loveActually
agree with you about queues - I was in the Post Office yesterday desperatly trying to cling onto my toddler whilst shuffling up the queue with shopping bags and parcels to post (currently 36 weeks pregnant) when this old lady asked to to move out of her way please so she could cut through the queue as the long way round was a little awkward !!

nearly lost it i tell you !!!

Congrats, btw, Cyteen! Weren't you on Due in 2008 antenatal thread?

Agree about queueing, standing etc - the phrases "Excuse me, I am pregnant and need to sit down", or "Do you mind if I have your seat - I'm pregnant" in a narky voice seem to spring to my lips a lot these days, especially in shop changing rooms when waiting for a cubicle - had to get someone's teenage child to give up her seat on Saturday and got daggers from both of them.

That even in the early stages of pregnancy you will wee about 100 times a day!! Go to the bathroom and 5 mins later you feel as though your bladder will burst again so you tend to stay closer to the loos.lol!!

That your bladder will play tricks on you - it will make you think you need a wee ten minutes after you last went, and then when you get there nothing will come out, then half an hour later you will wee for England.

That you will hear your stomach rumbling but not feel it - unless I have a feral growling monster baby.

Hi ruthosaurus Yes, my darling boy arrived on 1st September weighing 8lb. Pics on my profile if you want to see. When are you due? [/derail]

That you get troll feet.

That all parents will tell you to get rest/sleep while you can but in reality you'll have broken sleep from around 30 weeks (or earlier!) and can only hope to catch up in the afternoon once you're on maternity leave (assuming you're a first timer).

Also, that you can imagine how life will be once your baby arrives but you can never ever really appreciate how life will change (for the better). So just nod at well-meaning new parents, ignore them (you'll never take in/believe/understand what they are saying anyway) and enjoy your pregnancy - the reailty will come soon enough.

First timer here - gave birth a week ago!

Oh, also, that hospitals are so risk averse it's unbelieveable. They will want to admit you after 39 weeks if you so much as fart, as they are scared of being sued. trust yourself and know your own body (within reason). Don't take any risks with more serious stuff but trust yourself.

You actually get used to having a six-week period and when it finally ends, it feels odd not changing a towel every couple of hours .

[continued derailment] Hey Cyteen, pics are gorgeous! I'm due on 12th Nov and am the size of a small car. Can't wait. Is all going well with you?

Hey....

Cant make up my mind if I have found this thread funny or absolutely terrifying!!

Am 26 weeks and have experienced most things mentioned.... though I was never actually sick with morning sickness, just incredibly nautious..... I even found myself wishing I was being sick for some release!!!

Nobody ever told me about the sleep issues.... Cant get comfortable in bed without a million cushions.... which make me feel like Im cooking so still cant sleep!! Throw the covers off and am then too cold... so I lay half in half out of the covers, taking up the space of a small whale and finally feel comfortable... YEY!!! Except this is the point I normally need to pee!!!

When Im not needing to pee Im rolling around with leg cramps.... Or almost peeing the bed because my bladder has gone to sleep and that odd uncomfortable feeling is me just about to wet myself..... I realise Im about to wet myself when bb helpfully tapdances on my bladder....

Then there is the fact that if anything goes near my nipples I want to hurl... Whats that all about?! Because its certainly not going to help when breastfeeding is it?!

Oh well... it will all be worth it in the end... Just wish I could stop having very graphic nightmares about childbirth...