Active discussions

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

Did Any Of You Choose Not To Find Out The Sex?

42 replies

chinchi · 04/08/2008 13:34

I have my 20 week scan tomorrow here in Turkey and Im so excited!

I was scanned 3 weeks ago due to severe cramping and the baby refused to let us know the sex Ever since I have kind of enjoyed the guessing game and think I have made the decision not to find out the sex tomorrow (providing he/she wishes to show us this time)!

Did any of you not want to find out the sex, but later go on to regret it? Im quite confident at the moment that I wont give in, but time will tell come tomorrow!

I have an 11 month old DS so will be quite prepared if its another boy, but not so much if Im in the pink corner!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Set a reminder
FruitynNutty · 04/08/2008 13:37

Why don't you get the Sonographer to write down the sex and put it in an envelope. If you have no will power then give it to a trusting relative/friend. That way you can have a look if you change your mind further down the line (if you're absolutely desperate)
Worked for someone I know
I don't plan to find out but I'm only 7 weeks so I might change my mind by 20 weeks!

cmotdibbler · 04/08/2008 13:37

Neither of us wanted to know the sex of the baby. It was really special when he was born and DH got to tell me what it was.

Iklboo · 04/08/2008 13:39

Neither of us wanted to find out - but I was convinced I was having a boy throughout (I was right!). Definitely didn't regret not finding out

vogue1 · 04/08/2008 13:40

Not knowing the sex of the baby makes the labour more exciting...

RhinestoneCowgirl · 04/08/2008 13:41

We didn't find out first time round (DS) and won't be finding out next week when I have 20 week scan for DC2.

I like the traditional 'it's a boy/girl!' moment when they slither out [sentimental]

cheesesarnie · 04/08/2008 13:42

i didnt with my 3.nice suprise!

meemar · 04/08/2008 13:42

We didn't mind with DS1. At the scan she asked us on the spot if we wanted to know and we were really curious, so decided to know.

We didn't want to know with DS2 and loved having the surprise. No regrets about not finding out.

Blu · 04/08/2008 13:43

I didn't want to know in advance.

I have always felt that it kind of blurs the line between unborn and born. find it relly weird when people refer to unbon babies by name or say 'he, 'she'...bu I know I am a minority with that!

I didn't want t form any opinions about what my baby ight be like - just meet him or her once he (it was!) was born.

And wanted some sort of surprise to look forward to...I think it went with my very lenti-weavery natural birth approach t pg and childbirth, too. To leave it to the rl thing to find out, rather than early scanning to tell me.

I'm not going to argue this as logical position - in fact I was very pleased to know before he was born that he had talipes and 'leg issues' - as I had found out some facts and meeting him wasn't mixed up with dealing with all that.

aGalChangedHerName · 04/08/2008 13:43

I have never known with any of my 4 dc. It's exciting to find out when they are born.

SlartyBartFast · 04/08/2008 13:43

i didnt find out, didnt want to. adds to the excitement. with ds they wouldnt tell us, different hospital different area with dds i think they knew but told them we didnt want to know.

Caz10 · 04/08/2008 13:48

Didn't find out, didn't regret it!

Had this horrible nagging thought at the back of my mind that if something went wrong, knowing whether it had been a he or she would have made things worse.

Thankfully all went well and she was a lovely lovely surprise!

Might be tempted to find out if we have no.2 though, just for keeping of pink babygros etc!

notcitrus · 04/08/2008 13:49

I didn't want to know, mainly because people keep asking like it's important and then coming out with cliches about how boys/girls do/are this/that (which are both boring and bollocks...)

However I figured that seeing as I did my PhD in embryology, I'd tell from the scan anyway, so might as well get the sonographer to confirm and point it out to MrNC, who was fretting about being able to choose a name.

I think the baby and his personality will still be a big surprise when he's born. And MrNC is still refusing to agree a name in case it doesn't suit him once he's here...

thequietone · 04/08/2008 13:50

It's one of the last big surprises in life. Don't find out - the agony of guessing will all be revealed in that magical moment after birth.

Blu · 04/08/2008 13:52

oh, god yes, other people's bollocks and cliches...even if i did know I would never have told anyone. Didn't discuss names with anyone except DP, either.

lakelandfirsttime · 04/08/2008 13:58

We've also decided to wait to find out (only 4 weeks to go now!). We thought it would add to the whole excitement and anticipation of the birth. Although I must admit I'm now desperate to meet the little one and find out whether we're having a "blue" or "pink" one!

bikerunski · 04/08/2008 14:01

I did fidn out, but I am in the minority amongst my friends and collegues. 33+6 now, so we'll know if the sonographer was right soon enough!

RhinestoneCowgirl · 04/08/2008 14:01

God the cliches - like if you know you're having a boy and you happen to mention that you're getting a lot of kicks there will be a lot of sage tooth-sucking and proclaiming of 'boys will be boys' or 'he'll be a footballer then' [yuck]

Original poster
chinchi · 04/08/2008 14:01

All of your experiences sound great and thequietone I think you have summed it up perfectly!

We already have names so thats one big hassle out of the way! My sister in law is coming with me tomorrow and I told her to find out but she is sworn to secrecy!

OP posts:
LadyOfWaffle · 04/08/2008 14:05

I didn't find out this time and I am really glad I didn't. They got it wrong with DS anyway (eventually was 'corrected' at 32 week growth scan), but it does make it even more exciting this time, although I am so 50/50 about it I rarely think about it. Everyone else seems to want a girl though! Every ache and pain apparently means (according to my mum) "ooooh, it's a girl!".

Original poster
chinchi · 04/08/2008 14:13

Ladyofwaffle

Apparently because baby bean refused to show us last time then 'that must mean its a girl', and because he/she is kicking ten to the dozen then 'it must be a boy'

I could go on with the long list of Turkish methods of trying to determine the sex! A relative took a look at my DS's belly (yes DS and not me)! and told me I was having a girl!

Another woman threw salt over my head without me knowing then asked me what I was doing (I was playing on Nintendo DS at the time) If I had answered her and scratched my nose that meant I was carrying a girl, but because I rubbed my chin when I answered, that meant it was a boy!

OP posts:
MyDingaling · 04/08/2008 14:14

I didn't find out was posiyive I was ahving a boy.
DD2 was born 13 days ago!

pigleychez · 04/08/2008 15:25

My daughter is 11 days old..

We decided not to find out the sex at all during the pregnancy.Its was lovely to have the suprise at the birth. We enjoyed the guessing and choosing both boy and girl names.
It was funny too having all the family trying to guess the sex.

In fact it was DH who discovered her sex at birth.. I was so amazed that baby was here after 27 hours of labour that i forgot to ask/discover what sex it was.

lydiathetattooedlady · 04/08/2008 19:51

we didnt want to know-but had a trainee sonographer (sp) who blurted it out! we were gutted, i cried in my hormonal state!

Califrau · 04/08/2008 19:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

fifisboys · 04/08/2008 20:29

Didnt find out with ds1 but just knew he was a boy, found out with ds2 just so i knew if i needed to keep the mountains of boys clothes etc

Swipe left for the next trending thread