Push Present

[BrightStork]

Would you be upset that your partner got himself present -new playstation after just brought baby home but not you?

Yep! Upset, worried and furious

Eh?

Nope not in the slightest be concentrating on my gorgeous newborn

No.

If it hasn't made much difference to the family finances (ie you can afford it) I would laugh and say to him "oh honey....you really think you're going to get chance to play that with all the sleepless nights and nappy changes?" and then hand the baby over and say "by the way she needs a new nappy right now" and take yourself off for a nap.

It would give me a massive ick

If he just bought himself a PlayStation then no, I wouldn’t be annoyed.

If he bought one to congratulate himself on becoming a father, then yes I would be annoyed.

Does he plan to spend paternity leave playing on it instead of learning to be a dad?

He sees the baby as your responsibility, treat and 'hobby' so wants something for himself too.

Infuriating.

A push present isnt a thing here, thankfully. I would be extremely worried about when he thought he was going to play on a playstation

If he has taken paternity leave he probably envisions having lots of time to indulge in his new hobby while you indulge in yours (baby). Put him straight.

This. Hilarious he thinks he will get time on it though🤣.

Were you expecting a ‘push present’ 😵‍💫?

I wouldn’t associate my DH getting PlayStation as a present to himself as such. Not that he’d ever buy such a thing for himself.
We didn’t buy anything other than baby stuff and it didn’t occur to me to expect a present for having a baby!

He is a man child. In his eyes caring for the baby should be left to the Nanny. You are the Nanny and housekeeper.

Is this real?

This has all the hallmarks of a man who thinks the baby will be your full responsibility @BrightStork
Don't fall into the trap of expecting him to 'help'. He needs to take full shared responsibility for the care of your new baby.

Well it isn't a push present because he didn't do any pushing. Did he just happen to buy it at that time?

DP and I spent quite a lot of time playing Animal Crossing when he was on paternity leave with our younger DD. It's quite easy to achieve with a newborn chilling on your lap. Harder now we have two toddlers!

I wouldn't immediately leap to anger and rage unless he isn't contributing to parenting or housework, but that is a separate issue.

I would also expect that he is still able to pay his fair and agreed amount to the household and that you have your own money to spend on things you want.

Not really, you don’t need two PlayStations, surely you can share.

What the fuck is a "push present" anyway?

It’s when mothers expect an expensive gift for birthing their own child.

What did he buy you for actually doing the pushing?

They know....

TBF I thought when I had my first baby I'd have lots of time for reading and needlework whilst on maternity leave

Hate the term "push present". I didn't push anyway! Also don't need a present from my husband for having a baby.

Not sure when he thinks he'll be playing on that PlayStation though!

Not at all, he bought himself something just the same way that you can buy yourself something. It's not like you bought him a PlayStation and he got you nothing. My husband got a very expensive gaming pc a few months beforee DS was born, made sense as he knew he wouldn't have as much time once baby had arrived.