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Original poster

Mil told her daughters i am pregnant

108 replies

ThisDreamyExpert · 10/08/2026 10:31

I dont have a particularly close relationship with my mil. I dont also feel like I want to do much to get too close. Although she is nice and wonderful to my kids and sees me as her own daughter. I always had a superficial rel to her. Please try to read my previous threads to het a better understanding of me to get full picture.
i fell pregant two years ago and told her, I later dound out feom my SILs that she had told them. It came out and she at first said that in her defence, she had told them I think I might be pregnant, not that it was a certainty. She then later did apologise to me personally while in the kirchen. My husbnad had told her that it was not her place. I am still fuming at times now. My colleague told he mer mil did this and it just brought up old anger and resentment. Please help me to still maintain a decent relationship with her. She is generally lovely.

OP posts:
EveryoneUsingOutro · 18/08/2026 13:39

ThisDreamyExpert · 10/08/2026 10:45

Thank you, I see I might ve unreasonable here.

Might be? 🤣

God you sound like a petty vindictive grudge holding nightmare. It was 2 years ago and she has apologised.

Sounds like she’s trying so hard to be a good MIL and you’re just resisting all efforts at a normal relationship.

EveryoneUsingOutro · 18/08/2026 13:51

shhhh2025 · 10/08/2026 11:48

No one is this pathetic

Oh I can believe someone is! I’ve met someone like this. They were exhaustingly negative and I cut them out very quickly.

EveryoneUsingOutro · 18/08/2026 14:01

ThisDreamyExpert · 18/08/2026 12:21

Okay I see most people here think I am absurd for holding onto or even being bothered intensely by it in the first place.

Second thing, my mil is a matron, quite a strong personality and I dont always like being around her. The last few months we had a Christmas gathering and 2 birthday parties (my two small children). At the christmas party we had arranged who will bring what. I said I will do chicken, she responded to the messages (ot was a group chat) that maybe my husband can then also do lamb since he enjoys roasting and at that stage lamb was missing from the menu. He does it every year. . I got annoyed by her suggestion because I felt she was telling me what to do. She said ‘maybe your husband can do a lamb?).

at both my little ones’ separate birthday parties she baked the cakes. We had a lovely party and was only to cut the cake later on. She came to me to ask if we could cut the cake at some stage. I responded each time with ‘sure’. But felt resentful afterwards because I feel she is controlling or trying to tell me what to do. Have seeked counseling and nothing helps me see her in better light.

Maybe get yourself assessed for PDA? These requests by your MIL are completely normal and your reactions are anything but.

You are so far out the realms of “normal” thinking that only specialist counselling will help you now.

Stop posting and asking people to slate your MIL and look into some professional help.

Doesn’t your DH point out how completely unreasonable you’re being?

MyPlumHelper · 18/08/2026 14:11

The MIL noted lamb wasnt being done and asked if her DH could do it, thats controlling what people eat.

The MIL asked her if the cake was going to be cut- that's telling her what to do.

I would honestly be terrified of ever speaking to her in case I was accused of something from an innocuous request.

SleeptightEvangeline · 18/08/2026 16:57

OP, does it give you pause that all your examples are met on this thread with a 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️. Christmas was 8 months ago. Is the meat roasting thing still bugging you? What does your dh have to say about it?

MrSchubertWhiskers · 18/08/2026 16:58

ThisDreamyExpert · 18/08/2026 12:21

Okay I see most people here think I am absurd for holding onto or even being bothered intensely by it in the first place.

Second thing, my mil is a matron, quite a strong personality and I dont always like being around her. The last few months we had a Christmas gathering and 2 birthday parties (my two small children). At the christmas party we had arranged who will bring what. I said I will do chicken, she responded to the messages (ot was a group chat) that maybe my husband can then also do lamb since he enjoys roasting and at that stage lamb was missing from the menu. He does it every year. . I got annoyed by her suggestion because I felt she was telling me what to do. She said ‘maybe your husband can do a lamb?).

at both my little ones’ separate birthday parties she baked the cakes. We had a lovely party and was only to cut the cake later on. She came to me to ask if we could cut the cake at some stage. I responded each time with ‘sure’. But felt resentful afterwards because I feel she is controlling or trying to tell me what to do. Have seeked counseling and nothing helps me see her in better light.

I think these are You problems, op.

It's very clear you dislike your mother in law, as you say, but it isn't clear why. She's sounds perfectly nice.

Aiming4Optimistic · 18/08/2026 17:08

OMG, the woman suggested filling a gap in the menu and asked if it was possible to cut a cake! 8 bloody months ago and you're still festering over it!

Every comment you post makes you sound more and more like a total loon.

NotMeAtAll · 18/08/2026 23:34

Kindly, you really need professional help. Your reactions to innocuous requests are not normal.

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