How long was you with your partner before having a baby?

[strongmamaxo]

I mean planned pregnancies:)

We married after being together for 8 months , DS was born 10 months later , he’s now 32 , we’re still happily married

7 years but we were young. Too old to have dc with my now dh however if I’d been 5 years younger when we met it would have been decided a lot quicker

DD born almost exactly 2 years after we met. Married when she was 3. We were 38 when we met and felt like we had to make quick decisions about starting a family. DD is now 12 and we’re still all rubbing along quite happily together. 🙂

Oh dear. At one year they are still in the love and lust and excitement and best behaviour stage. Very bad idea. She is probably being a fool but it’s standard these days when the state is there to pick up the pieces and people don’t have to plan their families carefully.
Yes there can be accidental pregnancies and sometimes women get pregnant knowing they may end up alone and are happy with that. It’s just a shame that so many children have poorer chances because of casual attitudes to family planning.

A good example of when moving quickly can be the best decision.

Together 5 years, then got married, first child then born 4 years later.

18 years 😅. Met at 18, married at 33 and now finally decided to have a baby at 36. Sometimes I think we should have got started earlier but I don’t regret how much fun, carefree time we had.

We moved in after one year, engaged after two, married after three, pregnant after four and ds1 arrived almost exactly five years after we met

but at that point I was 35 so needed to get on with it

could have done stuff more quickly but pleased I didn’t. For me, getting married and buying a house was more important to do first but not everyone will see it that way.

my parents met married moved in and had me in just over a year. I think things were different in the 70s tho!

Together 5 years before getting married. Got pregnant 18 months later, not through lack of trying though. We decided to try for a baby as soon as we were married.
I do think anything less than 2 years of knowing someone is unadvisable, although I guess it depends on your age.

6 years

7 years. But we started trying after 2 and a bit years together, due to our fertility issues it took a while and lots of IVF

9 years together and married for 1. Planned pregnancy. We were together from the age of 18 and 19. Still together 26 years later and two more children.

Both! 😆

Had 3 babies inside 4 years so those 6 years were a bit whirlwind! Long time ago now.

About 5 years. Fell pregnant but lost our twin pregnancy just before our wedding day. Then got pregnant a few months after getting married.

I think everyone is different and age is relevant too. Wanting to try after knowing each other in your late 30’s is different to getting pregnant after a year when you’re 18.

I know some people who had a whirlwind romance who are still together now.

That being said, it would of been too early for me

Together for 12 years and married for 2. We did meet when we were 18 and had our baby at 30.

Together 7 years and married for 1 :)

11 years.

But a good friend started trying after 6 months with her now husband. They first met when they were both with other people, were kind of on the periphery of each others social circles for a long time so they weren't totally unknown to each other. When they reconnected they were both ready for kids and didn't want to wait.

5 years. But if we'd met when we were younger we'd have waited longer. We were having a lot of fun flying around the world and basically doing what the hell we wanted before we had kids. If we could have dragged that out a bit longer we would have. I do think valuable time spent just as a couple is so important before you create another human.

a few months,,,kinda just happened

Met got married 28 days later and first born 9 months later and now oldest is 16 and we have them right down to twins of 4. Works for some and not others I guess

18 months when we began TTC, 3.5 years when he was born

I'd never have planned a pregnancy before marriage. We got married after 18 months together and as it turned out it took us another 2 years to get pregnant. The important thing is whether they've had the boring conversations.

How are they going to organise money when she's on maternity leave. How are they going to split baby care duties to ensure no-one ends up dangerously sleep deprived. What are their views on contentious issues like infant feeding, safety, and more general parenting philosophies?

The problems start when two people who don't really know each other have a baby and then we get the threads like "AIBU to think I shouldn't be living in poverty whilst on maternity leave? I'd ask my partner but he's f'd off to the Maldives for 3 weeks," or "My baby's Dad goes to work, comes home and parks himself on the sofa, he says looking after the baby isn't his job," or "My child has just come home from a weekend with the ex and has had 23 hours of screentime," or "My partner tried to tell me I can't breastfeed in front of his family and should sit in the toilets at a restaurant,"

When eldest was born, we’d been together 8 years and married for 3. We got together when we were 20 and 22 though so we weren’t in any rush to have children

It baffles me why anyone would be selfish enough to plan a pregnancy in the current state of things, unless you're filthy rich you'd be bringing a child into an absolute mess of a world with fast dwindling prospects.