Sept 2024 - Thread 10!

[SpicyMoth]

Saw we hit page 40, so figured I'd get a head start on the next thread just in case!!

Oh gosh, I just thought, there may not be very many more of these threads - I wonder if this one may even be the last?!

HUGE congrats to @MudandMoet on their gorgeous wee one!!
Best of luck on your way home this afternoon/this evening, I'm desperate to ask all about what it was like but I'll avoid that as I don't want anyone to get nervous/anxious about what's to come!!

Super glad you're feeling mostly okay and so so SO happy for you! <3

I’ve got these swaddles for indie and definitely rate them. They’re tight on the arms with the Velcro so her arms don’t escape but lose on her legs so she’s free to kick.

Indie also had the proper scream crying around 10 days - 17 days. Was a tough week, she constantly wanted to be on my boob in the evening. I spoke to a few breastfeeding friends and they said they also had the same around that time and it was because baby was upping/regulating supply. The first few weeks are so hard breastfeeding but they said it began to get easier around 6-8 weeks

I was also going to add ..... That Esme has gone from 8 b 6oz to 7lb 8oz so I suppose cluster feeding/being constantly attached isn't a bad thing because maybe she isn't quite getting enough and is hungry.... Sounds about right @Emmaev ? Xx

Forgot to attach the swaddles I have for indie

I have heard that babies fed to get into their percentile line. Inds was 7lb 2oz at birth and went down to 6lbs 8oz it took her 13 days to get back to birth weight and she was feeding like crazy once my milk came in so I think she was just catching up. Since she’s reached birth weight she has calmed down a little although she still feeds every 2/3 hours but she’s much more settled between feeds now

@TripleESept24 we had a few fussy periods like that when his tummy seemed to be at him - a warm bath and poonamis straight after. The older he gets the less he struggles with it though.

Also seems to help if I drape his arms over my shoulder and kind of gentle jog him around the kitchen. Seems to stretch his tummy enough for all the wind to come up but definitely looks odd. It's so deregulating when they're having crying fits, really hope it settles for you soon!

@Decaffe if he loves the movement of the bassinet would you try one of the rockit tools that move the buggy while they sleep in it? I don't have one myself but have seen it work magic on my friends baby. She took every nap in the buggy for a year and slept like a trooper.

@BakeOffRewatch loving seeing their bond start to grow!! And my eldest is pretty calm about it all now 3 weeks in. 🙌 But definitely finding it tough how much I miss having unlimited one on one time with him. Considering giving up breastfeeding tbh because between missing my first DS and mastitis it just doesn't feel worth it right now. Going to wait until the hormones settle a bit more before making a call though. And I haven't done drop off yet but crèche pick up has gone smoother than I thought it would. Too nervous to leave baby in the car so have popped him in a sling for it. I'm doing drop offs later in the week so 🤞🏻 they won't be an unholy mess when eldest DS realizes the baby gets to go home with me.

Anyone else struggling with crying?! Past couple of days it's got me.. not all day but once it starts I can't stop. I don't even feel sad. Then I feel guilty as Ruby is so tiny and reliant on me. I think it's the poor sleep, having to sit down so much and feeling overwhelmed/trapped

I have those exact swaddles @Emmaev !! Defo trying tonight.......

@WinsandSam yes!! Been crying all afternoon and just cried now after dinner. I just feel so overtired and I actually feel quite alone because I have no family around :( I said to health visitor today I need parent and baby groups to make friends and meet other mum's!!

@TripleESept24 My baby isn't here yet so I can't say how they'll be doing with these, but I have swaddle sacks from Ergo baby. The arms have little poppers so you can swaddle them when they're little and then when they start to roll over you can bring the arms out.

@kc92 yes, the 121 time! I did my first day alone with them both and found the time went so slowly. I couldn’t sit down and do a time consuming activity with toddler like we usually would. Between feeds and nappy changes each hour crawled by, even though I left the house a few times for playground and shop. I think it’s cos I’m so tired. That’s lovely to hear your DS and baby have such a strong bond already! I’m sorry to hear about the mastitis, have you tried got/cold therapy? I have these microwave bead bags, but I think any hot water bottle would do. I also find hand expressing under hot shower helps. Hope it goes away for you soon, it can be so painful! lansinoh.co.uk/products/therapearl-3-in-1-breast-therapy-pads Boots and John Lewis stock online.

@WinsandSam yes I cried at a Netflix romcom ending today

@TripleESept24 def give them a try they’re great for indie because it stops her getting startled and waking herself up. But she’s free to kick her legs around. I’ve only just started using them in the last week but wish I’d started sooner. I pop a little cellular blanket over her too and tuck it into the sides, the material is quite thin on the swaddles. Then I pop her white noise on, and she settles after boob for a couple of hours. It did take a few attempts to get her to settle like this though. Best of luck

@TripleESept24 I get that, especially if you don't have family around. Must be so so hard. Even with a great partner it's tough
I've called on my mum to come over tomorrow and stay. Just to give me a chance to do some bits around the house (for my sanity) and give my arms a break. Our health visitor has referred us for a baby massage group too. Maybe as yours about local groups?
I have really bad back pain/sciatica which isn't helping as I can't go for walks which would help me.
Hopefully tonight you can get a bit of sleep with baby being swaddled and some white noise

@WinsandSam it is so hard with no support circle. Didn't realise how hard it would be 😣

I am about an hour and a half into trying to lay her down in her crib, she's fed for an hour on and off and the first time I laid her in the crib in her swaddle she looked cosy, but as before didn't last longer than ten minutes! She's back on the boob now, I honestly feel drained and am not even holding out much hope that this swaddling or white noise is going to make any difference just seems within 10 mins of lying down flat she is unhappy/uncomfortable!

@TripleESept24 where is the country are you based? Wondered if anyone here is local to you.
Keep trying honestly, it didn't happen for us straight away. At the beginning it was easier for my partner to put her in. She wouldn't have it with me.
Now I have the side of the next to me down. I pat/stroke her belly/chest when I put her down. Believe me, sometimes she just screams and I have to take her out again.

May be worth speaking with midwife/health visitor. Maybe she isn't feeding enough? Especially if after an hour

I'm in Nottingham......

I have the next to me side down, and I always have to lean in and stroke her tummy and she likes her face stroked, but yes settles her sometimes but sometimes doesn't, and it's normally only for 10 mins or so.

I'll speak to midwifes or health visitor. We also have a breastfeeding support group I think that's tomorrow I'm going to check!! Honestly she's been on and off my boob now non stop since about 11pm...... I think she can't be getting enough, because she's losing weight too not putting any on 😣

@TripleESept24 maybe that's the issue for her? I'm no expert as figuring it out myself too. Will she sleep/lie next to you in bed? Co sleeping might work for you

Sending hugs to everyone at the moment, between 2-6 weeks I find is the hardest with babies, they seem so unsettled and unhappy but it's quite normal. They're still very new and getting used to being out in the world, and they're bodies are still learning how to digest and work which causes them discomfort, it's hard to see them in pain with wind/constipation but it will pass. I also understand the crying (mum's not babies), it's hard going at the moment especially with sleep deprivation, we're all doing our best for our babies, that's all we can do xxx

After I said that swaddle and white noise work, I was up every hour last night with indie. And my eldest had a bad dream so was in the bed with me and I didn’t want the baby in bed as well, so she wasn’t happy being in her cot.

Just when you think you’ve cracked it, they throw a curve ball haha.

@WinsandSam she didnt settle in he crib at all last night, but yes would settle in the bed next to me and I did fall asleep with her! It seems to be the only way to get some sleep

@BakeOffRewatch thank you! ☺️ I'll give those a try - will do anything to get over it!! Had it first time round too but cleared it a lot quicker than this.

@TripleESept24 some babies just need extra support to sleep through I think. My first was a "high needs" baby, required lots of cuddles and contact to sleep, and was constantly feeding. He's still just as spirited, adventurous & determined 2 & 1/2 years later so think it was definitely his personality shining through early. It's so tough though when all you want & need is rest!!

Just on the weight loss, did you have any IV in labour? I vaguely remember being told that boosts birth weight a bit, and makes the weight loss in the first 2 weeks look more significant. As long as she's having plenty of wet & dirty nappies she should start gaining soon.

@Emmaev same here. 😂 Toddler came in at 1am to look for his water bottle and was delighted we were all having a sleep over.

& For those of you still waiting on babas October is going to be such a magic month. ❤️ Lots of tough bits in the first few weeks but so many life changing moments too.

On unsettled babies / cluster feeding…mine was like that in his first few days. In hospital, the midwives assured me that it’s all fine and normal, but I got a private midwife to visit me on day 3, 4 and 5 at home and it turned out that he’d lost too much weight (11%) and just doesn’t get enough. I now breastfeed and supplement with formula and he’s thriving and settled. Despite best efforts to increase my supply and advice from a lactation consultant, I just have insufficient milk supply and need to give formula after each breast feed. My advice would be to double check that the little ones definitely get enough. If it means supplementing with formula, so be it. A fed baby is most important IMO. Formula can always be phased out again later if there is sufficient milk supply. Mine still happily takes the breast although he also feeds from a bottle. Hang in there everyone, these first weeks are tough ❤️

@kc92 what is IV?? 🙈😭 not sure if I had it or not?

@Cinai2 I am going to a clinic next week to keep an eye on her weight ....... and going to contact breastfeeding support group because I'm concerned she's just not getting enough/my supply isn't enough! All though she is having plenty of wet and dirty nappies!! Xx

She's happy as larry now/in the daytime in her crib! Typical isn't it?!

@TripleESept24 I hear you on the lack of support network. We live abroad and have absolutely no one. My DH is very hands on when he is here but he's at work all day and also travels a lot for work (he's going on a 2 week business trip on Monday 😥) I didn't realize how much I would need someone to pop in for the afternoon and just hold the baby or something. I am overtired and overstimulated. It doesn't help we live in a hot country so we are also stuck in the house for the majority of the day and sometimes for days on end if there is a tropical storm.

I am looking into getting a helper for 2 days a week but I can't bring myself to hand over a baby this small to a stranger yet. Even for a few hours.

@HuggingAnIcePack887 it's really hard isn't it 🥺😓

@TripleESept24 I talked it up too. Ruby did an hour and then was up crying/unsettled for the rest of the night. Again only slept on me 😢 so I ended up watching married at first sight. Day time on the other hand is a doddle! She'll settle in her Moses basket and snooze most the day

Same, we have both been sleeping all afternoon!!!!! 😣😭 I have appointments tomorrow afternoon in town so have to go out properly for the first time and can't laze all day tomorrow 😭 will have to start getting ready as soon as we get up in the morning because who knows how it'll go! X