Due Dec 2023 - part 6

[Nclktnntt]

Follow-on from part 5 heading into delivery and motherhood.

Those of you using slings/carriers - did it take time for your little one to like it? Our LO is almost 4 weeks old and around 10.5 lbs now if not more. I tried the sling but think I had it too tight, keep trying the carrier but he hates it, I don't know what I'm doing wrong. Granted only tried it twice as it only arrived a couple days ago but just so disappointed as I was really hopeful I'd get shit done still. Today's been a bad day for us. He's not slept or eaten well at all today and it's like he's fighting his sleep. He loves his sleep. I feel like I'm doing something wrong but I don't know what 😥.

@Beans1982 so far the carrier has been a total failure , we have the ergobaby omni breeze - so far he hates it, but loves the same position just being held. So I think I might have the position wrong somehow. I'm gonna keep trying as I think it could be a familiarity thing. Finger crossed 🤞.

@Vsah22i have managed to book my scans for Friday, doubt the docs will do anything with them now till the following week but at least there's progress now lol.

@Nclktnntt look to see if you have a local sling library. They often have people who will help you with your carrier if you bring it along.

@Nclktnntt my baby is fighting sleep today too. Apparently it happens around this time as they wake up to the world and want to see everything! He slept well last night so I woke up feeling good, but now I'm exhausted after trying to get him to nap all day! I gave up and he's having a contact nap.

@Nclktnntt mine hates the sling too, we have a fabric one and a ‘proper’ one but she hates being held in that sort of position even without a carrier.

That said, if the stars align (has happened once or twice only) and you get her in it at the exact right stage of sleepiness, she will then happily nap in it for hours. It’s absolutely not guaranteed though so all the advice to ‘pop them in a sling’ is meaningless.

DD1 didn’t like being in a sling at first, she was a very colicky baby. I would try her in it for 5-10 minuets every day and eventually she was fine, and actually enjoyed being in there more than her pram! I seem to be
lucky with DD2 as she loved the sling straight away and it always gets her to sleep (but putting her down in her crib still somewhat of an issue!)

My daughter was fighting sleep all day yesterday, eventually napped at 5.30pm for 4 hours! 🥴 so we were up wide awake from 430-630am. So very tired mummy today!

Morning all! How are we all today? Thank you all for your help and generally making feel not alone 😊 So we tried again this morning with the carrier and ... SUCCESS. He's in, calmed and now sleeping. I'm scared to stand still though 😂

My LO thankfully had a really good night sleep wise, woke for a feed and nappy change every 3 hours ish and was back asleep within 30-40 mins. This morning so far is going well. I was worried the lack of sleep yesterday would have lead to a really bad night but thankfully not this time.

My LO is only 4 weeks tomorrow - should I be doing anything during his wake windows to make sure he is needing his sleep when it comes? When he's awake enough we look at black and white picture book and I talk to him mostly. I think I was missing his early sleep cues. Going to try doing better at that.

@Nclktnntt not sure I have any solid advice re wake windows but have read a few things that say babies look to the side / away from you when they’re tired / overstimulated so might be one to look out for!

does anyone else feel like they have read too many schools of thoughts re feeding, wake windows and sleep training etc?! I honestly have no idea if I should be doing what I’m doing I’ve read so many contradictory things 😩

@gurlwhaat absolutely, I’m finding it overwhelming.

we’re feeding on demand and feeding to sleep, but I’m stressed that those things are ‘wrong’ but nothing else works!

I wish I hadn’t read the books / been accosted by all the instagram algorithms because I’m happy with what we’re doing for now, just feel bad about it that I’m ‘ruining’ future sleep routines

Sorry about the lack of messages! How is everyone? I'm struggling massively with 2 but trying to get through! They're both unwell with colds and the eldest is prone to croup so that'll be fun. Meant to have baby girls 8 week jabs today but she's got a cold so seeing if they want to go ahead. Really need to start using the sling but can't get the hang of it. Hoping everyone is okay xx

@Nclktnntt @Mushroo I fed my eldest to sleep until around 18months. He's nearly 3 now and sleeps through all night! Honestly try not to worry.

@Mushroo I was feeling the same. My LO is only sleeping for 45 mins at a time at the moment other than one good 3hr sleep at the start of the nighttime. And it's killing me. I have cried, I have read every possible thing to work out why and how to help and got so confused. In the end I rang the health visitor and she told me not to worry about future routines and that I should be feeding her and cuddling her to sleep. Although she was no help with the length of sleep and just told me to keep doing what we are doing, she did stop me from feeling guilty.

@GL1987 thats really reassuring.

We get a couple of 2/ 3 hour stretches at night which is good, but from about 4am she’s pretty restless so I’m shattered.

Keep reading about these wonder babies that can do 5 hours and it sounds like a dream.

@Nclktnntt We’ve been laying him on his playmat to let him kick about which he loves and it burns energy which then helps him sleep. We’ve also used the baby bjorn carrier a few times around the house which he always nods off in. We've tried the bouncer too but it’s not obvious that he enjoys it yet so we only use that when he wants to be more upright.

One thing we’ve just bought which has helped a lot for when we put him in his bed is a bed warmer. You can get little heat mats that gently warm their bed so we put that on low before we are due to put him in it and then take it out when we are ready to put him in it for a nap or his sleep and it’s helped massively. Before then he would go to sleep on us and we would go to move him to his bed and he would then get grumpy because his bed was cold compared to us so that then woke him up again.

We managed a 5 hour stint Wednesday night but he is formula fed. He’s just turned 6 weeks and we found during the day he wasn’t going down for very long in his naps at all so it was a constant cycle and really draining as it was hard to do anything especially as he wasn’t settling so we went up to 150ml a feed that night and had our best night yet.

We are still struggling with constipation though, trying massages and exercises, I’m hoping this is just a phase and it gets easier for him.

Firmly believe there’s no bad habits. If there was a secret to great sleep there wouldn’t be so many people trying to sell you a solution. My first isn’t a great sleeper he woke very frequently until around 18 months (like every 2-3hours if not less) and then just got better. Number 2 so far seems better he’s already done a 6hour stretch which my toddler didn’t do till 18months. Not doing anything different apart from stressing way less about it all and expecting it to change/ go tits up at some point.

Massively recommend Lindsey hookway and little nest on instagram if you want a bit more normal baby info rather than unrealistic expectations. Might help change up those algorithms @Mushroo

@Noname112 thank you so much, I’ll check those out!

I watch his eyebrows to know when he needs sleep! They turn red first before yawning etc. Often feed to sleep or in sling, very occasionally can self settle with dummy at night. I do what gets him to sleep. Sleep is so disturbed at this stage it feels pointless to me trying to establish anything so rigidly when it will all change again! He did 2 hour stetches in week 4. Week 5 he woke at least every hour to feed. Past few days he only did 30 min stretches in day, but slept 10-4 and 5-8 at night. Last night he was up until 11, awake by 1, sleep by 2:30, awake at 4 and refused to settle again. Then slept 3 hours in sling this morning 😅. Who knows what tonight will bring!

4am onwards is hell. Low sleep pressure and guts wake up so worst time for wind etc. They're gassy and no longer as tired. Wake ups after then usually result in hours of restlessness.

I’ve also found it really tough from 4am onwards! Baby won’t settle at all unless lay on me, and even then there is lots of grunting and wriggling!

In terms of feeding to sleep, I fed DD1 to sleep until she was 15 months old and had no problems later on with her sleep. She is now 2 and sleeps through most nights, so I wouldn’t worry about creating bad habits - just do whatever gets you through the nights and keeps you sane!

Is anyone else going through the 6 week peak fussy phase? I remember DD1 also became extremely fussy/colicky around week 6, and it looks like DD2 is following suit with non-stop crying all day, every day. DD1 was like this until she was around 3 months 😰 so bracing myself!

@LittleButtercup yes!! My daughter is 7 weeks yesterday (Friday) and peak fussiness is here 😩 she was already colicky anyway so we’re in for a treat! She cried from 6pm-10pm last night. Stopped briefly for a 15 min bath then continued screaming the house down. Could have cried! Not had a night like that in a few weeks.

The hot water bottle works a treat for us too. Especially at night.

@LittleButtercup yes! My little boy is 8 weeks tomorrow and has been a nightmare in the night for the last week or so! Went from waking every 4 hours to every 2😩 luckily, the last 2 nights haven’t been as bad so I think he’s coming out of it now!

Hi all,

I’m also in the “Sleep goes tits up from 4am, I want to sob/do sob” Club.

She’s an ok-ish sleeper besides that. Her naps are crap but I know that’s developmentally
normal, they don’t really consolidate naps until 6 months - although to be fair she does in the pram with motion, she’ll sleep more than 1 sleep
cycle in there.

We’ve started a gentle bedtime routine, and seem to get our best stretch of sleep from 8pm to 3am (With a dream feed at 11pm, which my partner does) I mean, there’s wake ups in that time but her sleep pressure is fairly high and she’s easy enough to settle.

I am a fan of sleep training. It worked wonders with my other 2, although before even considering it I always worked on sleep environment first and ensured baby was healthy and well - reflux sorted etc…

I will sleep train (If needed) When she’s old enough. For now i’m totally winging it (Besides the bedtime routine and differentiating between day and night as best as we can)

She’s a real crier!! She’s just turned 8 weeks and hates the Mamaroo, hates being put down, and just seems to hate life in general 🫣 She’s only happy on her changing station, which is obviously unsafe to leave her on! When she’s on there she’ll do a little smile, coo back to me, is really engaged etc… But that’s literally the only place she seems to like life 🤣

We are going for a tongue tie assessment on Tuesday- maybe she’ll be happier once that’s cut.

Has anyone had the 2 month check from the HV? Some of the questions…. I feel they expect an awful lot.

She asked does baby sit in her bouncer, watch TV and chuckle? No, she doesn’t. She barely smiles. It’s fleeting and occasional, but she is very vocal and it’s like she tries to talk back to me when i’m chatting to her.

Can’t help but worry if she’s where she needs to be developmentally? I had no qualms until that 2 month check!

Hope you are all doing okay? Does anyone recommend a good baby chair for day time naps (supervised downstairs). She doesn't seem very comfy in the one we have anymore and keeps waking

Hi all, new poster but have been reading for a while.

My LO is 7 weeks old and we are EBF. It's going really well which I'm really happy about as my first baby had loads of feeding issues and we were never able to BF. However, nighttime sleep doesn't feel like it's getting any better, it might even be getting worse?! He used to waken 3 times around 1, 4 and 7 which I was fine with seeing as he was only a few weeks old. However this week we haven't been able to even get a 2 hour stretch of sleep, and I keep reading on other forums etc about December babies sleeping through or only waking for 1 feed. My first baby was also doing a 5 or 6 hour stretch at this point.

I know I can't be the only one, so looking for some solidarity 😅 wondering if it's more typical with BF babies than bottle fed... or maybe it's a growth spurt?!

He also won't take a bottle so me going to bed early and leaving him with dad isn't an option either.