Glass of wine at 35 weeks pregnant

[colourPink]

I had a glass of wine today at my mums funeral. The last few weeks have been awful with her dying very suddenly and being heavily pregnant.

I didn't ask for it but at the wake afterwards my husband came back with it and said one small glass won't hurt and you deserve it. I enjoyed every sip! It really did help settle me down after the service.

However, a friend made a comment at the funeral about it and I'm struggling to let it go. She said something along the lines of "no matter what I was going through I'd never have a drink while pregnant. Too many risks." She then laughed afterwards but it's bugging me.

Maybe I'm feeling especially emotional/sensitive today but since then she's worried me about having one glass. Thoughts?

@becksbeer123, get off your high horse - you claim to be someone caring - 'if I was her friend' blah blah, then continue to bang on about how, in your opinion, OP shouldn't have drunk a glass of wine. Did you actually read the OP? You know, the one where she said it was her DM's funeral? Do you still want to go on about it?

@colourPink, so sorry for the minor derail. You did absolutely nothing wrong, and assuming that your Mum felt the same way about you as you clearly feel about her, I would imagine that she would have said good for you. I'm so very sorry for your loss. Whilst I'm definitely a bit (maybe a lot!) older than you, I lost my Mum back in January. It still hurts.

You've answered your own question here. You don't have a drink to relax. Personally a glass of wine after a long or hard day is my go to. I am currently pregnant and although I haven't had a0 drink, I would absolutely love a glass of wine. A non alcoholic beer etc would be horrible for me. You say you enjoy going for dinner, again that'd be an ordeal and not relaxing for me.

She is a bitch!

And she is wrong - the baby is cooked and fine.

I would call her out on that at some point.

Oh dear, I'm going to stop feeding it now....

How is that helpful?
Some people enjoy alcohol for all sorts of reasons and not least at a hugely stressful time like the death of a parent while pregnant.

You're friend is a spiteful cow and has no idea how you are feeling!

Baby will be fine OP

Your friend is no friend. My midwife actually told me to have a small glass of wine when I finished work on mat leave as she said it helps you relax which is good for starting labour. Can’t imagine a midwife recommending it if it was a danger. Obviously don’t go overboard but also kick your friend in the shin for their stupid comment

Well alcohol is a relaxant.

It is a time honoured way of switching your brain off quickly, which many people otherwise find card to do. Humans have been at it for millennia.

A GP friend of mine says if she could prescribe it a glass an evening for stress reduction she would.

I am not much of a drinker but I don’t find the principle hard to understand.

OP I'm so sorry for your loss. It must be hugely stressful and upsetting for you and your 'friend' was completely out of line.
One glass of wine will not have done any damage and if it helped you relax it will be better overall for yours and baby's health.

You have to weigh up the danger of the stress on you vs any minuscule risk from a small qty of alcohol.

I personally had 3 or 4 alcoholic drinks over the course of each pregnancy (at events like weddings) and not because of stress just because I wanted to and I'm an adult who can risk assess and make that judgement for myself.

So sorry for your loss, it's such a tough time. As PP have said don't worry about 1 glass of wine. Your "friend" is a thoughtless twat by the way!

I do not NEED it to relax. I enjoy it to relax. Everybody enjoys differences things. Thanks for the anatomy lesson, I wouldn't have known I was growing a human without your condescending comment. Clearly the OP had one glass of wine in 36 weeks, I don't think that could be called a crux.

You had a glass of wine at your mother's wake. Not a bottle. Your baby will be fine , I'd ditch the friend though. So sorry for you loss

That's awful. It's totally fine. If there was ever a situation when you need a drink, that would be it! Sorry for your loss and good luck with the baby.

So sorry for your loss OP

I had a glass of wine in early labor to relax me. My midwife actually recommended it 😂

Where did I say I need it?

You know the OP is a real person right? Going on and on on her thread is hardly giving a helping hand.

I was going to go for complete and utter bitch.

Nobody asked and nobody cares. Your comments are clearly neither welcome nor helpful, so why are you making them? What’s your desired outcome from this unpleasantness?

So sorry about your mum, sending a handhold ♥️

I had a small glass of wine with dinner at 35 weeks pregnant at a family wedding and another at 38 weeks the evening before I was induced!

You've done your baby no harm! As for your friend, she's not a friend. Bin her off.

This isn’t a hypothetical scenario in which we are debating opinions. OP feels bad and needs reassurance. The wine has now been drunk, and whatever your feelings, it can’t be undrunk.

So, what you’re doing is repeatedly posting on a heavily pregnant woman’s thread in a manner that is deeply unpleasant and unhelpful. I’m asking you what for? Why are you doing this?