@LittleAcorn20 so sorry it's so late - I wrote out the response the day after you posted and completely forgot send it to you - not helpful lol. What book are you reading?
@iratepirate - I've had 3 out of 4 of mine at home - feel free to ask any questions. I've absolutely loved my homebirths. They are not for everyone but there really is no comparison between hospital and home xxx
Response to original message below xx
Other children:
My children have all been at home when I’ve laboured - however it’s been during the night so they have been asleep. My eldest has woken up at the very end each time (he was 2, 5 and 7 at the time) and has opted to stay in the room. Last time afterwards he cut the cord and dug around in the placenta with the midwife 🤢 my advice would be to either have two birthing partners in the house, or someone close by that could either take her out, or play with her in a different room and get her snacks etc if she or you needed that at that the time.
I also think it’s really important to prepare them. You need to have honest conversations leading up to Labour so there’s no surprises. Let your daughter know you might be loud, even make a game out of making the noises together so she knows what to expect (im assuming she’s about 2 rather than 15 for this one lol). She needs to know where the baby will come out of - especially if she’s little and expecting it to fly out your belly button lol. Tell her she might see some blood but it’s ok it’s not like blood from a cut so doesn’t hurt you. We have some really lovely books about home births that are for children to get prepared - I’ll dig out the names of them for you. I also watched some gentle birth videos on YouTube with my children (screen them first). It’s amazing how children just take birth for what it is - a normal part of life that needs to happen so they get their baby brother or sister. Ive honestly never spoken to anyone who’s said their child was scared or traumatised in any way. They strangely bring a calmness to the situation. I think it might be scary for them if they were in the hospital with you, but it’s their home. Where they are most comfortable, have their toys around, can watch tv, have cuddles with the other parent / grandparent / friend who ever else may be there etc. I think kids generally get scared when they don’t know what’s happening. If they are prepared then they seem to actually quite enjoy it.
Mess: In regards to mess - there won’t be any!
For my first two home births I’ve had a pool set up in a carpeted room. We covered the floor with tarpaulin and old towels. I however didn’t end up getting in it.
The third time I decided not to bother even putting it up. I always have a birthing box prepared in advanced. It was filled with cheap shower curtains - go to wilkos they are £1.25, and old towels (ask people for them - it’s amazing how many people will have that they don’t actually want anymore. When you tell them you will take their oldest ones away they act like you are doing them a favour lol). The midwife simply popped them underneath me, along with some big puppy pads that they have with them. Afterwards the midwife puts it all into a bag and takes it away and leaves you with no mess whatsoever.
Some women use old quilts or buy a few cheap ones to Labour on it in the house, but the mess is contained to where ever you are and all sorted out afterwards.
Birthing box / what to pack: I would highly recommend having a Labour box of some kind. Have everything you might need in a box all in one place, it makes things so much easier for everyone. If you’re in a pool and plan to wear a bikini top put it in, along with a t shirt or something if you want to get out and don’t want to be naked. Things like a flannel, lucozade sweets, thermometer for the pool, towels, floor coverings, tens machine if you’re using one, a torch, sieve, and mirror if you are using a pool. Your midwife will tell you what you need ready, but if just makes it more straight forward if knowone is having to ask you where x y and a is when you are 8cm and hating humans.
Also pack a hospital bag - just like you would otherwise. Put everything it in you would need for you and baby if you need to be transferred. If it comes to needing it it’s ready and waiting. If you don’t need it it’s also really handy to have at home anyway for the first few days, again so everything is together.
Transfer: I can’t comment on that aspect I’m afraid as all mine have been successfully born at home and no transfers needed during Labour or after the birth.
Generally at 37 weeks your midwife will come to your house to do a check. She will check that you have a flat clear surface like a table or changing table, even a clear kitchen side that if the baby should need resuscitating there is a place to do so. She’ll check things like parking and access to your house/ flat just so when the time comes they know what they are doing. If you plan to have a pool she will want to know where it’s going and will reenforce that you need space around the entire pool for her to move safely around (it can’t be against a wall). Some trusts bring gas and air to this appointment and leave it at your house. Others bring it on the day. However they do leave a birthing pack with you. It’s not very exciting- a bucket to dispose of the placenta, a load of bin bags, gloves, after birth notes, can’t remember what else but it’s all pretty boring stuff.
There are many plus points to a home birth.
You are In your own environment which means you are more relaxed from the get go. You don’t have to get in a car mid Labour and go to the hospital, and afterwards you don’t have to stay on the postnatal ward. You can get in your bed and not move until you are ready. Plus as amazing as post birth tea and post is - if you want to order a dominos afterwards you can 😆 you also get more attention as you will get 2 midwives all to yourself, you won’t be sharing them with anyone else, they are there for you & you only.
Even though I am considering other options this time round, I have really loved my home births. There’s honestly nothing like them, they are an incredibly special. Massive downsize is if you rent or end up moving house - the emotional attachment to your home becomes pretty strong. As a military family I’ve birthed my 3 in 3 different homes and am used to moving every few years, but leaving a house your baby was born in just hits a little different.
Sorry if I’m now repeating what you have already found out, but feel free to ask any questions that may pop up over the next few months xxx