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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

2 potential fathers clear blue 1-2 weeks

103 replies

ramdom · 11/08/2022 00:24

I have found out I am 1-2 weeks pregnant on clear blue test on Monday 8/08/22

My last period was 11/07/2022

On the 21/07/2022
I slept with guy 1

On 28/07/2022 I slept with guy 2
30/07/2022 I slept with guy 2 again

Does anyone have any understanding on who the father could be by the dates and the clear blue being 1-2 weeks

It's a mess and I'm really stressed out
I have an abortion booked on Monday because I don't know for certain who father could be and I am hoping for it to be guy 2 is this too close together to hope for guy 2 ?

Please don't judge :'(

2 potential fathers clear blue 1-2 weeks
2 potential fathers clear blue 1-2 weeks
OP posts:
WonderWoop · 11/08/2022 00:34

How long are your cycles?

Pretty impossible to say
If I had to bet I would say it's guy 2. I don't think you would have ovulated to conceive in time for 21st but good to know average cycle length.

Does it change the decision in any way or you'd just prefer to know?

Original poster
ramdom · 11/08/2022 00:36

WonderWoop · 11/08/2022 00:34

How long are your cycles?

Pretty impossible to say
If I had to bet I would say it's guy 2. I don't think you would have ovulated to conceive in time for 21st but good to know average cycle length.

Does it change the decision in any way or you'd just prefer to know?

My cycle is 27days thankyou for taking time to get back to me

OP posts:
WonderWoop · 11/08/2022 00:42

So hard to say. My logic would be you likely ovulated 26th and conceived 28th.

However you could have ovulated 23rd for example and sperm from 21st caused conception.

Sorry I'm not being very helpful as it really is guesswork unless you have some sense of your ovulation date.

boxboxbox · 11/08/2022 00:45

I'm thinking guy number 2 but as PP have said, it all depends on length of cycle etc

CornishTiger · 11/08/2022 00:45

Are you in a relationship with guy 2.

I think you need to be honest from early on if you don’t have the termination.

Loopyloopy · 11/08/2022 00:51

I would guess guy 1. Sperm can survive 3-5 days. Impossible to know for sure, though.

Loopyloopy · 11/08/2022 00:53

WonderWoop · 11/08/2022 00:42

So hard to say. My logic would be you likely ovulated 26th and conceived 28th.

However you could have ovulated 23rd for example and sperm from 21st caused conception.

Sorry I'm not being very helpful as it really is guesswork unless you have some sense of your ovulation date.

I would have thought that if she ovulated on the 26th, the egg would have gone by the 28th?

hban · 11/08/2022 00:54

Really hard to say

using a conception calculator, most likely conception dates are 22nd to 27th, so guy 1 and guy 2 are just outside of this. It depends on where abouts you ovulate. Based on the dates of the pregnancy test and result it looks like it’s likely to be 25th July to 1st august, so with the combination of the above it looks more likely to be guy 2 but it’s very hard to say.

good luck with whatever you decide to do but if you have the abortion have it because you don’t want a baby, whoever the father is

Original poster
ramdom · 11/08/2022 08:48

It is hard because some of the ovulation calculators are not the same as the clear blue
And are showing different dates

OP posts:
AnguaResurgam · 11/08/2022 09:14

It’s not ‘hard’ I’m afraid, it’s impossible.

The overlap is too close and well within biological variation.

The only way you can know is via DNA test.

LionessesRules · 11/08/2022 09:23

It could be either of them. Sorry.

Okeydoky · 11/08/2022 09:28

Don't put any weight on the weeks indicator. They're notoriously unreliable.

Sadly there's no way of knowing without a DNA test.

MoodyTwo · 11/08/2022 09:31

Oh OP how awful! Could I ask if it was number 2 would you keep the baby? What is the relationship like with both men?

I would however terminate, as you'll never be 100% without a DNA test x

chasingtherainbow1 · 11/08/2022 09:31

Difficult to say. I'd be more inclined to go for guy 1 if your cycle is 27 days. Without knowing your exact ovulation day, it's hard to determine. I have a 28 day cycle and ovulate on exactly CD 14. So if I started my period on 11th like you did, my ovulation would have been around 24th. So if yours is a 27 day cycle you're more likely to have ovulated before 24th. However, this is purely guess work. Sorry I couldn't be more help

Original poster
ramdom · 11/08/2022 09:48

MoodyTwo · 11/08/2022 09:31

Oh OP how awful! Could I ask if it was number 2 would you keep the baby? What is the relationship like with both men?

I would however terminate, as you'll never be 100% without a DNA test x

Ive told both men
I would keep if it is guy number 2 he is supportive and doesn't want me to get rid of the baby and has wanted to be with me for a while now he has always been saying I'm his girlfriend I just struggle with trust from previous relationship so I've always just assumed he isn't being genuine and had my guards up he doesn't know about guy 1

But guy 1 was the 1st and last time we had sex I am friends with him and he is married and I'm friends with the wife too they have 4 children he has been trying with me for 2 years just for sex and I gave in after a few drinks I am so ashamed of my actions and I've spoken to him he has said I should get rid of the baby he also knows about guy 2

OP posts:
SNWannabe · 11/08/2022 09:52

I personally would never base a decision to terminate on a relationship. If guy 2 is a decent human who knows you’ve slept with another man recently why does the DNA of the baby even matter to him? If he wanted to be in a relationship with you then to it baby should be loved and accepted by him despite biology. If he is making a condition of the relationship exist based on him being the bio father I would ditch them both and be a single mum.

Elsanore · 11/08/2022 10:45

Sorry to hear you're in such a hard situation.

Regarding your pregnancy and decision whether to continue with it, how do you feel if you take both men completely out of the situation. Imagine neither of them existed, how would you feel about becoming a single mum to your baby by yourself?

Really hard to imagine. But might help separate your feelings out from the relationships versus actually being pregnant.

Curlywurly3 · 11/08/2022 13:10

You can actually get a paternity test from 7 weeks pregnant but it is quite costly at around £700

Russell19 · 11/08/2022 13:20

It's impossible to know without a test. So sorry OP but try not to make the decision on the relationship. Consider if you were to do it solo and what you'd do.

calmlakes · 11/08/2022 13:24

I wouldn't have a baby in this situation.

It would be very difficult for the child growing up if they are the offspring of the married father of four.

Having a termination, working through why you made the choices you did and what you want going forward seem sensible to me.

If you want a baby getting yourself in a stable relationship with a decent bloke and setting yourself up for a baby seems a good start.

That said that is only my view and you need to make the choices that are right for you.

Jaaxe · 11/08/2022 14:58

Really sorry but it’s impossible to say which without knowing exactly when you ovulated and even then depending when it was it could be either as sperm can live 3-5 days. Did you use any contraception method with either? That may help narrow it down slightly?

I’m completely pro choice and completely understand you considering termination but as others have said try not to panic and base your decision entirely on not knowing who the father is and worrying it could be the guy you don’t want it to be. It may not be his. Do you want a baby? Would you be able to do it alone if it isnt the guy you want it to be’s? Do you have lots of support around you? Stable career, home etc? Try and think about the pros and cons of terminating and continuing the pregnancy in your decision too and what you want not anyone else.

Also, I know you have it booked for Monday and I’m sure it’s not something you want hanging over you if a termination is definitely what you want to do but you do have plenty of time to weigh things up and decide so don’t feel you have to rush into it. You might find the pregnancy choices forum on mumsnet helpful to discuss with other women in similar situations. The termination services also have councillors if you want to talk through your options etc beforehand. They also offer it post termination too.

Hope you are ok and sorry we all don’t have the answer x

Original poster
ramdom · 15/08/2022 16:50

Update I had my scan today for the abortion

They can't find the baby
They said I am less that 5 weeks pregnant by last period

And I shall go back in 10 days

Is this meaning I conceived later and could potentially be guy 2

Please I need some thoughts

OP posts:
Jaaxe · 15/08/2022 20:06

I think the liklihood is it’s guy 2 but I still think it could be either. You are 5 weeks today going off your period dates.

I really feel for you, from your posts it sounds like you don’t really want to terminate the pregnancy but don’t want guy 1 to be the father so don’t feel you have any other option. Have you thought through all your options and chatted with someone you trust or the counselling services the termination company offer about how you feel about keeping the baby or terminating?

Hope you are ok op x

Original poster
ramdom · 15/08/2022 20:28

Jaaxe · 15/08/2022 20:06

I think the liklihood is it’s guy 2 but I still think it could be either. You are 5 weeks today going off your period dates.

I really feel for you, from your posts it sounds like you don’t really want to terminate the pregnancy but don’t want guy 1 to be the father so don’t feel you have any other option. Have you thought through all your options and chatted with someone you trust or the counselling services the termination company offer about how you feel about keeping the baby or terminating?

Hope you are ok op x

I really don't want to terminate the pregnancy I really would like it to be guy 2 I would love to keep the baby if it was for certain guy 2

But I can't carry a baby for guy 1 as he has a family and wife I can't do that to a family and ruin and break their situation from a silly mistake

OP posts:
MissMaple82 · 15/08/2022 20:40

Impossible to tell, could be either. Literally no way of guessing it

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